Not that I have ever been married or know how it is at all, but I do know that relationships only work if the two people communicate a lot, especially when they are frustrated or hurt by the other. It seems that the communication, when it has been there, has been all negative and blaming and just hurtful. If you two can't get together and have a real conversation without all the insults and blaming, it seems that if you want to save the marriage, you two should see a mediator or counselor. I don't know how you two can be together without both apologizing to the other and working out your problems, which does not seem to be happening. It is really sad to see it all come to this. I'm sorry about everything that happened. And I hope that it all is resolved in whatever way is best.
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