just like a pill...

[true_image]

i'm sure it's been well over a month since i've updated. i don't know, i just don't care anymore. about anything. i mean, i'm not going to say that i haven't had any spectacular or fabulous times this summer, because i certainly have. i don't know what's going on with me and i don't want it to be this way

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[riseupsinging]

i don't know if i act too childishly about it or too "adult," but it bothers me. i personally think you're just right. i really admire that you don't drink, or smoke, or whatever. you're mastering sober lucidity, and that's a real talent. i think you're too good for that honestly. i don't drink normally, and when i do i always drink too much and end up falling asleep or being stupid. smoking cigarettes is dumb. none of those things make me cool. and pot just makes me SO irritating to other people. believe me baby, it's better to have people love / hate you for who you are when you're not on drugs of any kind then it is for people to love / hate you for who you are when you are on drugs, because it's so hard to keep track of why someone feels the way they do about you. as for sex, yeah it feels good but only AFTER you figure out that you're allergic to condoms, semen, birth control makes you crazy, your boyfriend doesn't really love you, you have another yeast infection, oh no am i pregnant, someone's cheating on you, your

[true_image]

thank you, emily. thank you for everything. i know that we haven't really hung out very often in the past, but i feel like i can say that, without you, things would be harder for me. you're someone that i can talk to and not worry about being judged in any way, and you give such reassuring advice. as soon as i get my car fixed and i have the time to get to your house, i'm going to because i miss you! how are nicky and your other sister (i feel awful, but god help my i can not remember her name)? anymore pictures being developed soon?