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So my Dad sent this to me....probably because I complained too much about the occasional attractive girl who ends up being dragged to the gun show by her boyfriend....an occurrence happening more and more frequently....which I find annoying, since come on, put yourselves in my shoes, an attractive girl who also likes guns, enough to spend an entire weekend morning walking around a convention center looking at various weaponry? I mean, that's a no brainer for me, but for a girl? And again, a seemingly cute and cool one to boot? .... It's like trying to adamantly denounce the existence of ghosts, while living in a haunted house; all you want is a quite evening playing video games, but damned if the tv is currently floating out of the room....I mean, what the fuck?
(well, whatever, tearing this apart should make me feel better....)
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10 surprises about single gals
By Dave Singleton
Men often ask the question, “What do women want?” A wise person once answered, “If you want to know what women want, ask them… one at a time....and get ready to hear what they think you want to hear....or some form of repulsion, either verbal or physical." Actually, seriously though, no, that does work....as long as the girl views you as a non threatening friend type; for all she cares, you may as well be gay. Case in point, the instant a guy gets interested in a girl, he acts different, goes all feral, and the girls can pick up on it....usually negatively so, since the guy generally is out for a hot piece, and the girl wants to be treated well and respected....go figure....yet I truly wonder how much of that is stereotyping? Are girls REALLY that dumb? To say, go out with a guy because they act nice, when really they are the very definition of wolf in sheep's clothing? When, by contrast, I know many guys (albeit shy, awkward, or disillusioned) who would do well by a girl. Yet, women seem, some and/or at times, to be singularly drawn to the attractive, charismatic asshole that plays the game, blatantly so I think, but then, maybe the girl doesn't see it? Or chooses obvious fantasy over reality? Who knows. It's about the only way I can explain some of the guys I've seen walking around with seemingly attractive, interesting girls....and the guys....man, I just don't get it. Not at all....sometimes....other times it makes perfect sense. Regardless though, it all seems to be much too much a game, or a dance, moving the right way based on how they move....tch, it's stupid, and I refuse. If something can't be gained through natural process, then by what definition does it have purpose and meaning, outside of simply ones choosing? And I make a lot of bad decisions anyway....too many....all the time.
(but, this looks like it'd be fun to tear apart, so let's get to it)
Since that’s an impossible task for any man no it's not, I've done it! maybe not all of them, but enough of them, and sure, girls from Mozambique might think a little differently, but due to locational constraints, I only have to focus on the shallow ass tricky bitches girls we have here in the states. And within a society, the general viewpoints of most on a small scale tend to reflect the big picture. Plus, dating pools share commonality. , I asked several single ladies to share what men really don’t know about them and what they look for in a date. Guys, you might find their answers surprisingly myth-busting in some instances, while others might validate what you already believe. Either way, hopefully these ten insights will give you the inside track on understanding women better and improving your dating skills. Moving on....
1. You risk it all if you wait forever to reach out to a woman who interests you. “Supposedly, men and women are on different timelines when it comes to making contact,” says Mary L., 38, a resident of Washington state. “Guys take their own sweet time to call us for a date and follow up afterward. But the older we get, the less tolerant we are of the waiting game. Guys, wait too long to get in touch - or be inconsistent in how often you’re in contact with us - and we will lose interest. Patience has more of a shelf life than you realize.”
Ok, well, this is obviously just a misunderstanding between the younger mentality which favors more game playing, ie. the hot, young chick that all the guys are after may want to play games, or might even be out dating multiple guys so as then not have the time for more frequent connection....as opposed to the 38 year old single woman who's played the field, maybe a few, and still kicks it alone each night....this question should be invalidated based on age. The only other thing I can think of is that older guys, having likely established a career or prior family that she may still have ties to (children), may not themselves have the time later on in life to drop everything and devote themselves to one person, especially after having been alone for so long. Plus, the older guys get, the less active and party focused we become, and we like things to be casual. A woman who wants to jump into something and move too fast seems desperate more than affectionate. Perhaps it's less that "men don't understand women" and rather that the sexes assume the same for both, and as a result, continually operate of different wavelengths?
2. Not all women who date are looking for a serious relationship. “Guys think we’re all on the same ‘dating for a relationship’ track. But sometimes, we just want to date casually,” says Los Angeles native Marcie R., 29. “We’re just happier being upfront about it. Guys seem to have a harder time admitting that’s what they want right now. That leads to hot and cold behavior, which women hate.” Not looking to get serious? Send those signals out from day one. Don’t start seeing a woman and then back-pedal like crazy when things get heavy. It’s much better to find a girl who’s OK with casual dating, too.
I admit, I just don't get this concept. It's like catch and release fishing....the fun is NOT sitting there with your line in the water and getting a sun burn while watching a bobber that rarely moves....sure, the fight on the line is enjoyable (ie, sex), but when you finally reel them in, the benefit is, now you have a fish! You go home and you eat the hell out of that fish! .... Yet with catch and release, uh, well, the fish usually dies 8 times out of 10 from being handled roughly and yet ignorantly set back into the water, just as fine as it was when you hooked it, tired it out, drug it through the mud, man handled it, and tossed it back to its watery grave....right? Same thing, with many similarities....guys will view it just as a girl will, but at 29, maybe she feels she has many more catch and release sessions in her future....but how long til no one goes fishing? A cold reality, but one none the less....especially again when matched with the male counterpart. If we really want to fish forever, we can; all it takes is money/power. Don't like it, do something about it....or at least ignore that it happens all around you consistently.
3. You’d be surprised about what women find to be genuinely sexy in a man. Guys, do you think you’re dazzling women with your bravado, squeaky-clean look and manly stubbornness? Well, maybe. But guess what? Women think that a man dressed in a plain t-shirt and a pair of hot jeans is truly sexy, so avoid anything too trendy, loose or ill-fitting - the classics are fine. Women love it when you ask for their advice. (OK, except when it comes to directions... that’s why you have a GPS in the car. At least one of you needs to know where you’re going on dates, right?) And if you are fixing, building, making, or cooking something specifically for a woman, the chance that you’ll get lucky just went up exponentially.
Ok....despite what many profess, clothes don't make the man. At least, I would assume the guy wearing the clothes is what women are attracted to. Or does a candy bars wrapper really make the chocolate and more or less sweet? Besides, you get right down to it, sex usually involved nudity, and nudity means no clothes....frankly, I for one would rather a hot naked girl, rather than one who looked good dolled up....again, that's just me....though I do have to admit ones attire speaks more deeply of how one views them self, so looking at it that way, there is some validity. And apparently girls only want you to ask their advice of frivolous things that don't matter, got it! Ok, now girls need to also realize that men are both expected and enjoy using their minds, all the time, in fact, it ties directly to the male ego. Women may perceive a guy to not care about them, because they never ask their opinion about something, however from the the guy point of view, they may feel like they have to decide, plan, and otherwise THINK of everything so that the girl is impressed with him/has use for him. It is just as important for a guy that he be as intelligent as he is strong; think of it as the girls form of "being required by society to be beautiful". So, when a guy doesn't perhaps consider a girl, he actually does so out of affection or protection. Not to say it's correct, and perhaps both sides could learn from such knowledge....but as for "getting lucky" from doing something specifically for a girl?....this makes me want to vomit....to think that a girl would have sex with a guy, that she was presumptively not going to have sex with before, all because he did something for her? Ok, that just doesn't make sense! Like, do I really consider sex to be even more meaningful than your average girl? Seriously...."oh, honey, you cooked dinner, here, let me give you a blowjob"....um....what!? That ranks up there with some of the dumbest things I've ever heard....especially so for me, since I've done many a nice thing for girls, and never had such an outcome. Of course, I don't go DOING nice things because I want something in return, so hopefully that has everything to do with it. And for the record, and girl that would succumb to "giving it up" as a compromise....you're a fucking idiot, and deserve the asshole you're with.
4. Being a cheapskate is a deal-breaker for women. There’s plenty of debate about who should pay for a date. Some people think that men should always pick up the tab, while others opt for a more practical “let’s take turns” approach. Regardless of who pays, a man who comes off as being cheap is persona non grata in a woman’s world. “Cheapness is the kiss of death for me,” says Linda W., 37, from Virginia. Focusing on how much the date costs, handing coupons to a waiter or refusing to tip service people adequately can make a bad impression on anyone and will usually nix your chances for a second date.
Hahahahahaha! I am the most non-cheap person I know, and I can say that both because of my actions and because of the guilt which prohibits me from being otherwise. However, I am also the only single person I know. By contrast, maybe of my friends think on much more fiscal levels than I do all the time, and yet they are all married. Damn, I was really hoping this was going to provide me with at least something I could consider, but nope, so far it's been the same old difference between what a group says, and what that group does. Just like politics....somehow it's accepted that politicians are two faced liers, but whenever they prove that fact to us, we're shocked and hurt....it's called choices people, we make them all the time, every day....of course, specifically to this question, it should also be noted that my casual philanthropy directly turns off a girl. Sure, they may think it's cool that I pay for everything to start, but if she decides that I'm of real interest to her, than me, and mine....and my money, would then be hers. Of course, when I continue to piss away money and not care, she is faced with not only a decrease in doting on her, but looking at it from a marriage standpoint, I'm obviously not good with money. However, one who is good with money, budgets well, and who might otherwise be considered "cheap" is a much better choice of mate....which is why I think people need to first realize why it is that they do things before they make decisions as to how things can be better....
5. Women struggle to make a connection while remaining independent, too. First dates can be like visiting an amusement park; at first, you’re thrilled with the flashy, colored lights and the sense of anticipation. As things progress, you find yourself alternating emotionally between rip-roaring excitement and the onset of dating burnout. You might feel a pressing need to just chill out at home and get a sense of normalcy by going through your regular, single-life routine. So, men, relax and realize that you’re not alone - women ride the same emotional rollercoaster that goes along with dating someone new. Like you, they vacillate between wanting to be in a relationship and craving independence. Finding the right balance is the key to satisfying these needs, regardless of who you are. Nobody healthy and sane wants to be defined by his or her relationship, and these days, women are more independent than ever before.
And this is a big mystery? Oh wow, men and women of the same species act similar in a similar situation....holy shit, go figure! Next....
6. For women, intimacy is the greatest foreplay. “Women grow up hearing the old adage that ‘Men don’t just want sex, they need it,’” says Stacy F., 31, a New York resident. “We get it. It’s right up there with food and sleep as a basic need. We like sex, too. But here’s the other side of the story that men need to understand: Women don’t just want intimacy. We need it. If you’re going to date us, pay attention to that.” Sound confusing? It’s really not; achieving true intimacy with a woman simply means that she feels comfortable being open and honest with you in order to establish a shared sense of trust and mutual respect. Once you’ve bonded emotionally, physical intimacy can be deeply satisfying.
Men don't need sex, they need focus. It is easier and more gratifying above many other things (however frankly, I'd still rather just get intoxicated to hell, as it doesn't effect anyone else, and doesn't involve ongoing anything....besides, if anything it's like weed, not really addictive, but that's not to say you don't want it all the time....) to have sex, but in and of itself, it's not really needed. Sure, I masterbate on occasion, but aside from that it's been over 2 1/2 years for me. It is possible to distance yourself from sex or the need of another person in your life, albeit lonelier and perhaps not as fun. However it still can be done, and is thus not a need. And just to more directly oppose this, men, being the decidedly more cognitive of the sexes (as decided, if nothing else, by every girl who throws her hands in the air and frustratedly exclaims "i'm just not good at math"....), feel they don't need to develop the same emotional bond that perhaps women do. Guys assume they've pretty much figured their girl out, whether they have or not, and this assumption is usually the cause of such miscommunication. The problem is, the girl gets upset with the guy for assuming incorrectly, and may not even do anything to correct him, whereas the guy, having only his assumptions to go on, can't figure out why suddenly his girl is acting totally out of character and freaking out on him. I'm not saying it's good that the guy operates on this level, but they do, and the only way I can think of to get around it would be for girls to communicate more. We all feel like if we wish for something really hard, that even though we don't tell anyone and no one could possibly know, we want so much for whatever it is to just magically manifest without effort....though usually, it doesn't. Girls, you can't go getting upset with your guy for not picking up on something you've only ever kept within you, however guys, realize that you DON'T always have the right answer and know what's going on, and to say "I don't know" is a huge thing....not so much for me, since I'm an ignorant shit, but pretty much for any guy I know, you could stand a bit more humility....we all could, but especially you guys.
7. They don’t call it women’s intuition for nothing. Women have great instincts. Yes, this is a stereotype, but stereotypes often contain a grain of truth. So, men, it’s better not to lie or become emotionally distant when she questions you about things like dating each other exclusively or what you did last weekend. Chances are she’ll know something is amiss, even if you think you’re sparing her feelings by lying. Even if you fool her once, you’ll have to keep your story straight, which isn’t always easy to do. And once a woman thinks she can’t trust you, it’s the kiss of dating death.
The reason for this, I believe, is for the same reason it is said that "women are better at multitasking, whereas guys are better at focusing". What does that mean in a real sense? Men can take a thing, a subject, and delve into to nearly every level, and the smart ones can retain much of this information. On some level I wonder if guys aren't driven by a need to be something, to define themselves by their knowledge and capability. If that is the case, I have more of a feminine outlook on this....however I lack the multitasking strength. That is, women seem to take interest in a great many things, and perhaps to not as deep of a degree. Is that maybe why men can drone on and on about the same boring shit, generally with other men, and women usually tend to politely remain quite or go elsewhere? True, men are also louder and usually more commanding in their speech, but perhaps "guy groups" form for completely different reasons. It does seem like the girls I've known what to go out and do many different things, whereas I have trouble coming up with anything I want to do. My reasons tend to be that I play through whatever it is in my mind, and if it sounds like more work than entertainment, I 'm inclined to not want to go. Girls probably think quickly on something, think it sounds fun, don't prejudge it the way men do (based on experience, girls should know that it is not simply an irrational disinterest, there are always reasons for the things guys do, in fact, that's what makes them easy to figure out. You observe a guy, and ask yourself "why are they doing that". then think of reasons, and see which one is correct. after a while you build a pattern, and you can start to learn what a guy is thinking AS he's thinking; it's fun. Not to say girls are any harder, just being less linearly structured they require more observation, but the principle is the same. case in point, when men disagree with something, realize you're entering the realm of logic and reasoning, and they will fight with facts, as well as past experiences; this is huge. the experiences a person has dictates their security in predicting the future, however I think men, again feeling like they need to be the thinkers, are effected by this more, if nothing else the pressures of living in a patriarchal society....if a guy doesn't feel inferior to women by perception, he does so to men who better prove themselves; everyone is under a gun, 'just depends on which one.)....and would like to do whatever such thing. However, to bring it back to the question some, I believe it is this multitasking ability to feel many aspects of the world around them that grant women their general intuition....combined also with a certain factoring in of a mans bravado in a situation, which directly diminishes observation to any degree. Women then, especially at certain times of crisis when a man might be frantically trying to figure out a solution to something, would maintain a better perspective of the situation, and thus have more actual options, if not solutions. It's nothing magical, in fact, by definition, it's quite sexist. And, with a little understanding, it becomes less sexist, and simply more stereotypical, since then a guy could learn to edge off sometimes (admittedly sometimes, as it doesn't come naturally) and look at a thing for all that it is. Just a girl, of course, as many do, focus exhaustively about a particular subject or interest. We are, after all human, and prone to be frighteningly....similar.
8. No woman wants to be your mother (or a carbon copy of her own). Women and men alike have grown up hearing that, in the words of the famous Al Jolson song, a guy wants a “gal just like the gal that married dear old Dad.” But smart single women, as much as they may adore their own mothers (and will grow to loves yours, too!) are not looking to be anyone’s mommy when it comes to dates. They know the difference between a man who lovingly respects his own mother and one who requires around-the-clock babysitting, emotionally or otherwise. Parenting another adult implies major control issues no matter who is doing it - plus it’s just plain creepy.
Yeah....yeah. I may not be able to take care of myself always, but I'll be damned if anyone else does....save a real parent, but he's my Dad, and he keeps track of me....but otherwise, yeah, how could there be an emotional equality there if one is subservient to the other? I don't know, I've felt like girls have leaned a bit on me in past relationships, which is the way it should be, until they stop even trying at all and get right up on your back....then you're enabling if you let it continue. And mom's? Hahahaha! Oh no, there's no thought in my head that I want a girl like my Mom. Don't get me wrong, I do love my Mom, but true be told, it's the love of a grandparent or cousin. Heh, yeah, no, in fact, I would say I actually want a girl that more closely resembles the opposite of my Mom....not exact opposite necessarily, but you get the idea. This question's boring; thank God this is almost through....
9. It’s the little things that matter when it comes to impressing a woman. If you want a woman to feel like she’s special, really pay attention to her; notice the small things, however unremarkable. Women will grown more attracted to you if they realize you are genuinely interested in who they are as individuals and the things that matter to them, no matter how trivial. Remembering something minor about her appearance, interests, lifestyle or behavior - whether it’s her favorite flower, preferred drink or what color dress she was wearing on your first date - all add up to win you big points in the game of love.
Again, this isn't specific to girls. Just like guys only really, really....really want sex, women only really, really, really want attention. Oh yes, I realize it sounds silly to any normal, healthy minded human being, but how many marriages out there end up being nothing more than codependency out of necessity? Neither party care to find someone else, or feels they can't, so they tolerate living with the other. It happens more often then you'd think. Look at the divorce rate, and as high as it is, it's only really that way in recent years because it's becoming more socially acceptable. In years prior, you just flat didn't get a divorce, period. To live with that? Hey, it's also generally why the respective sexes are said to cheat in a relationship....go figure. Maybe the sexes DO need their individual things to keep them happy. I don't know, I'm not a good one for this question, since I actively always try to pay attention to the little things, and again, not in a position to speak directly to the point in terms of their being much success there, but that's really because I was either focusing on the wrong thing, or putting too much emphasis on something she didn't really care about. I don't know, it makes sense after the fact, of course....finally, the last question.
10. Women are slower to end relationships than men, even short-term ones. “If a new relationship isn’t working out, we’re less likely to dump you without warning,” says 28-year-old Trish C. from Virginia. “When men do that and run off, we think less of them. Even from a short-term relationship, we extricate ourselves slowly to make sure we’re respectful, ready and not making a mistake. But the signs that we’re planning to leave are usually there if you pay attention.” So, guys, if your gut tells you that things aren’t working out, you’re probably right. If you decide to end things first, though, give her the same courtesy she’d give you by telling her in person and avoid the vanishing act. You might think you’re being kind by sparing her the dreaded breakup discussion, but in reality, she’d rather hear the truth
ssion, but in reality, she’d rather hear the truth.
Unless they lose interest in you, in which case you're lucky to even be informed. I would say the only difference here is that women tend to become more attached to their love interest than guys. There are possible biological, societal, psychological, etc. reasons for why this is, but the general outcome usually remains that way. Not to say there aren't millions of heart broken guys crying their eyes out for lost loves long since over with, but to them there are a billion women, so....you know....besides, that goes into the stuff near the beginning about how guys can just buy younger women if they want to later on, and women needing to hopefully settle down with one before than happens. Bullshit, mother fucking society, yet that's how it goes, until further notice.
Anyway, we're done, thank God, as I got bored with this like days ago....having only started earlier this morning. Alright, bye.