i have faith in the hannah. keep experimentin until youre excited. if you get too frustrated, dont push. take a break, do something crazy. come back. ps i was on your old street in pasadena yesterday and missed you guys :(
Typically, with my many and neverending lives I seem to be accumulating, I've always gone through deconstruction which leads to reconstruction, which -you're right- is a terribly beautiful and ugly organic process. It, for me, has included leaving many things I held comfortable and embracing things I'd lusted after, but stayed away from.
Everyone around me seems to know exactly what and how to make what they see and it's so frustrating... I try not to blame them or react to it because it's not their fault. I just tell myself that whatever I've got in me will be something greater than what I think it is, that's why it's so difficult to find.
Quarter-life crises are the absolute worst, right? I know you have lots of online friends you follow, and your life in real life to tend to - and I say this only to say I have no clue if you keep up with me or not! - but I've had some tough weeks to months, and maybe a year as well. You play house as a kid and imagine what it must be like to be as old as your parents are when you're that young. My parents were - duh - parents (two times over!) and homeowners at my current age (25). I am only a sophomore in school, unemployed, mooching off of boyfriend - just waiting, waiting, waiting for life to wake me up (knowing full well I've got to wake up myself). And you draw and I write, and I'd like to think the arts follow the same regime, but it's hard to find the motivation sometimes, and I wonder if that's what you're feeling, too. Like, I want to be Tina Fey (as you might have read, tl;dr!), but it's tough to just DO IT sometimes. I need to write but it's tough to do when you don't want to be bad at it
( ... )
That's one of my favorite paintings. Everything from the movement to the color choices are perfect. It's hard living up to that.
I definitely sympathize with you. I wish I could create something worthwhile. I feel like my graphic design degree is useless and now at 22 I'm going to get my masters in art history. I'm pretty sure I've lost it, but I'm hoping that by looking and studying the history behind everything I'll somehow be inspired to work even harder. Kind of like Motherwell, but not because I'll never be that brilliant.
You should keep working! It's easier said than done, I know. Try some master studies (Hello, Caravaggio!) and work on compositions that you enjoy. There's nothing wrong with toothy girls. John Currin makes a fortune from them. ha! Your photographs are beautiful. Maybe try a few sketches from them. You've got so much talent, Hannah! Just keep at it. People give up all the time and they miss out on the rewards. It just takes time and lots of work. You're definitely capable of it.
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ps i was on your old street in pasadena yesterday and missed you guys :(
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Everyone around me seems to know exactly what and how to make what they see and it's so frustrating... I try not to blame them or react to it because it's not their fault. I just tell myself that whatever I've got in me will be something greater than what I think it is, that's why it's so difficult to find.
<3
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You play house as a kid and imagine what it must be like to be as old as your parents are when you're that young. My parents were - duh - parents (two times over!) and homeowners at my current age (25). I am only a sophomore in school, unemployed, mooching off of boyfriend - just waiting, waiting, waiting for life to wake me up (knowing full well I've got to wake up myself).
And you draw and I write, and I'd like to think the arts follow the same regime, but it's hard to find the motivation sometimes, and I wonder if that's what you're feeling, too. Like, I want to be Tina Fey (as you might have read, tl;dr!), but it's tough to just DO IT sometimes. I need to write but it's tough to do when you don't want to be bad at it ( ... )
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I definitely sympathize with you. I wish I could create something worthwhile. I feel like my graphic design degree is useless and now at 22 I'm going to get my masters in art history. I'm pretty sure I've lost it, but I'm hoping that by looking and studying the history behind everything I'll somehow be inspired to work even harder. Kind of like Motherwell, but not because I'll never be that brilliant.
You should keep working! It's easier said than done, I know. Try some master studies (Hello, Caravaggio!) and work on compositions that you enjoy. There's nothing wrong with toothy girls. John Currin makes a fortune from them. ha! Your photographs are beautiful. Maybe try a few sketches from them. You've got so much talent, Hannah! Just keep at it. People give up all the time and they miss out on the rewards. It just takes time and lots of work. You're definitely capable of it.
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