XD
i dreamt i aborted a child two days ago..and i was traumatised the morning of yesterday..very traumatised..i cried..and if just a dream made me that way..imagine what it would be like in real life..it was so scary..i don't even know how i got pregnant in that dream..but the whole dream went against my morals..firstly, i do not agree with pre-marital sex! and i don't think i was married to the father of the child so BLEARGH..secondly, i am superbly against abortions. so this dream is impossible..stupid dream..i bet it will get stuck in my head for the rest of my life..like those other traumatic dreams i had when i was younger..like the one where surgeons were cutting me up to experiment or something..and i was wide awake! and then there was the one where clemence was threatening to throw me out the window (i actually thought this dream was real until i cleared it up with my mom 2 months ago..imagine the horror..for the past don't know how many years, i was so freaked out by clemence. afraid that he would really do it to me cuz' in my dream he was lifting me up and hanging me out of the window and i was screaming for help while my older sister watched and laughed..i don't think my younger sister was born at that time..)and there were others..which for a long time i thought were real too..and those which have remained in my memory for years..
so at church yesterday..i was staring at a snakeskin bag (not sure whether it is real or not) and crying..i'm weird..i know..and i was thinking of becoming vegetarian..XD but i won't! cuz' i'm a carnivore..lalala~ and then i came home..and i think i cried somemore..
on another note! clemence is currently in his room with NADIAH and he locked his door! XDDD *wonders what they are doing inside* haha! ah well..he says it's homework..and i would probably understand i guess..considering that i locked my door when my friends came over on saturday..it's all because of my annoying little sister! argh......i don't think i ever want friends to come over anymore..well him locking the door ain't going to give them much privacy..cuz' at the moment..my younger sis is hanging out at the door..peeping through the crack at the bottom and trying to listen to their conversation..adding her little snippets here and there..ah well! boo to annoying little sisters..
and then..w-inds. is coming up with a new single! yay! and boo at the same time..my christmas money going to it..=.=''' ah well..w-inds. is good! *nods head* i love them! XDD haha..
anyway, i seem to want people to hate me with the way i have been acting recently..i think about 5 people want to kill me now..i think this has something to do with it being the holidays period..cuz' i was something like that too during the june hols..and the march hols..=.=''' i deserve to be shot..*bang* haha..that would be fun..i wanna go for op again you know..it's so fun..i wanna go i wanna go i wanna go! *pouts* haha..ah well..better go get my sister away from clemence and nadiah before clemence flares up? bye..
so at church yesterday..i was staring at a snakeskin bag (not sure whether it is real or not) and crying..i'm weird..i know..and i was thinking of becoming vegetarian..XD but i won't! cuz' i'm a carnivore..lalala~ and then i came home..and i think i cried somemore..
on another note! clemence is currently in his room with NADIAH and he locked his door! XDDD *wonders what they are doing inside* haha! ah well..he says it's homework..and i would probably understand i guess..considering that i locked my door when my friends came over on saturday..it's all because of my annoying little sister! argh......i don't think i ever want friends to come over anymore..well him locking the door ain't going to give them much privacy..cuz' at the moment..my younger sis is hanging out at the door..peeping through the crack at the bottom and trying to listen to their conversation..adding her little snippets here and there..ah well! boo to annoying little sisters..
and then..w-inds. is coming up with a new single! yay! and boo at the same time..my christmas money going to it..=.=''' ah well..w-inds. is good! *nods head* i love them! XDD haha..
anyway, i seem to want people to hate me with the way i have been acting recently..i think about 5 people want to kill me now..i think this has something to do with it being the holidays period..cuz' i was something like that too during the june hols..and the march hols..=.=''' i deserve to be shot..*bang* haha..that would be fun..i wanna go for op again you know..it's so fun..i wanna go i wanna go i wanna go! *pouts* haha..ah well..better go get my sister away from clemence and nadiah before clemence flares up? bye..