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(Untitled)
Alcohol is literally poison, but I'm not against occasionally poisoning myself.
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(Untitled)
When my mom gets upset she regresses. Twice this week she's responded to unexpected events with, "No no no no No! No!" It is hilarious but odd and explains a lot about the way my littlest sister responds to conflict or things not going her way. Today the little one came crying and screaming into the middle one's room because she couldn't figure ( Read more... ) -
nothing
Thursday didn't happen for me. Slept all day, dreaming of run-down small towns on road trips that lead us to you. When I travel on dream highways I see an aerial view, do you? Sometimes I drive though I don't know how and sometimes my legs just decide to give out. They're paralyzed by sleep and it seeps into my dream, slowing me down.
Through ( Read more... ) -
I need you
What little girl doesn't love boys and typography?
I wrote his name all over
My books
Trying to stuff obsession where
I couldn't find love
In my heart for this boy
I thought that love was
A shoulder to cry on
His sister provided
Amply but
Her heart was for boys and
Jesus
My heart remains forever yours
Back then it was a
Feminine question mark
Somehow shaped ( Read more... ) -
talk
She says she forgives me because I have a personality disorder. My personality is out of order. That hasn't been my diagnosis in a long time, and I don't believe in it, but we don't talk about that now. She is kind but she tells me I am broken and that nothing can be my fault because I don't make my own decisions. This is wrong, but I let her tell ( Read more... ) -
Thinking on white
When I do get married - for I know I will, or at least strongly feel I am destined to, marry Ms. Right when the time is right - I have two wishes. I wish to be married almost anywhere other than a church, because I don't agree with the practice. My second wish is pretty conventional: I want to look like a princess. What could be more beautiful than ( Read more... ) -
Backlock
When you cut your own hair and there's that one slightly overlong lock that you missed because it sits in the dip at the nape of your neck? I fucking love that. My own haphazard haircut happened to have the same feature, as I felt when I reached back afterwards. It seems the most protected lock is the softest, and I must stop myself from winding it ( Read more... ) -
diablo
Our insides start to resemble our outsides. Insecurities and complexes weigh our heads down. Shoulders bowing, necks leaning, we shrink. Your pallor and extra weight betray your lack of caring. My pallor and lack of tone, my shoulder bones, are my weakness and fragility becoming apparent. Sometimes your smile reminds me of The Devil, a character I ( Read more... ) -
Omnomnomnombabies
Can I please put off the joys of womanhood for now and go into heat once I've reached the financial stability to handle a family? My body is yearning for bellyfruit and sending me signals every day about it. This is the age when I should be having young, the time when I should be healthiest. What my body doesn't realize is that even health-wise I ( Read more... ) -
Stillness
I still want to be torn down.
Looking down on others has become my preset lately. I am not humble. Others see me as condescending. It is my anger leaking out in ways that I'm not even aware of.
'I didn't mean it that way,' I protest when confronted. I didn't mean you were stupid, I meant that human beings are stupid. I meant that I hate everyone in ( Read more... )