Catch and Release: Chapter 4
Chapter Four
Alice had fifteen minutes to get ready for the most important night of her life. Fortunately, she was a planner and already knew what needed to be done. She flew around her room, tidying up and changing her sheets, bundling everything into the hamper in her bathroom. Stripping off her flannel pajamas and turning on the shower, she soaped and shaved like a girl possessed. She dried herself with one hand and brushed her teeth with the other, so distracted that she tossed her toothbrush into the hamper.
She realized her mistake, but chose to ignore it, concentrating instead on brushing her hair. She swiped on a coat of mascara and some lipgloss, then ran back to her bedroom to struggle into sheer black underwear, finding it difficult to dress with still-damp skin. She had been saving them for the occasion, and once they were on, she felt sexy. Over that, she put jeans and a fitted shirt, wrestling the last button into place only moments before the doorbell rang. Pausing for one last look around the room, she breathed deeply before flying downstairs, wiping a bead of nervous sweat from her brow as she answered the door.
Jasper stood outside, more nervous than he ever thought he would be. The first things he saw as the door swung open were Alice's bare feet. Somehow, in all the years he'd known her, he'd never noticed them. Feet had never been high on his list of a woman's most attractive features, and yet he found hers curiously endearing. They were small and well-shaped, with purple nail polish so dark it looked almost black. That detail was surprising; the thought of his good girl having a secret Goth side made him smile to himself, and wonder what else she might be hiding.
Without saying a word, he allowed his eyes to slowly wend their way up the rest of her body, appreciating everything along the way. Her legs seemed longer than usual tonight; when his gaze encountered their sweet junction, he knew he'd have to move on quickly or the evening would end sooner than intended. Her hands pulled nervously at the hem of her shirt, alternately hiding and revealing the curve of her waist. Her breasts rose and fell in tempo with her rapid breathing; he imagined what it would be like to touch them and closed his eyes for a moment to steady himself against the longing he felt, brushing his now-damp palms along the sides of his jeans.
He opened his eyes again, seeing the pulse fluttering hard at the base of her neck, and it occurred to him that she must want this in the same way he did. He looked at her lips-the same ones he'd kissed dozens of times now, reveling in their softness, their taste-and marveled as the corner of her mouth trembled with her effort to remain still under his gaze. When his blue eyes finally met her hazel ones, he could not have stopped the smile that spread across his face even if he had wanted to.
Despite his youth, Jasper was an old soul. He'd kept his virginity in the face of every urge to do otherwise, wanting it to mean something. With his previous girlfriend, he had always stopped short of actually having sex, thinking it was more a matter of poor timing than a poor match between them. Alice had proven the latter case to be true all those weeks ago, the moment he saw her on Tyler's lap.
For Alice, the way the porch light illuminated Jasper's hair reminded her of a halo, and the way he looked at her made her feel wanted and real, right down to her bones. She could not have said how he did it, but somehow he touched her with every glance, making her feel feverish and adored and anxious all at once. She wondered that such innocent thoughts could co-exist with the carnal ones that made her ache for him.
All Alice could think about were his hands against her skin, in her hair, finally touching her. She wanted him to feel the same way, so she returned the favor, trailing her gaze from the tips of his toes to the top of his head. He was wearing the same kind of clothes he'd always worn, faded Levi's and ancient motorcycle boots, but tonight he'd swapped the bowling shirt out for a faded black Henley with long sleeves. It looked soft, and that drew her in, making her want to run her cheek over it, to feel the ephemeral barrier it made over his warm, smooth skin.
She noted the way the shirt clung to his shoulders, flexing along with the muscles of his arms as he shoved his hands deeper into his pockets. She didn't know it, but he'd put them there because it was hard to hold back the urge to touch her, and he wanted to go slow. This was new for them both.
When he didn't make the first move, she forced herself to stay still, waiting to see what he would do. By the time he closed his eyes, she was ready to burst into flames herself.
"Come inside," she said, throwing the door open wide with a loud crash in her excitement. He grinned at her eagerness, letting it wash over him.
When she moved back to let him in, he wanted to rush at her like the starving man he felt like, but forced himself to move slowly. Keeping his hands in his pockets, he stepped forward.
Alice leaned against the door, crossing her hands behind her. The heavy steel was cold against her wrists, cooling the blood that raced through her veins. Jasper had been in her house many times before, but never with that look in his eyes. She swallowed, looking down for a moment to compose herself once more.
They had never lacked for words before, and the silence between them was fraught with tension. Neither wanted the other to see just how anxious they truly were, which only made things worse. She wanted to make a joke, but bit her tongue at the thought she might offend him or drive him away. The light seemed too bright, and she wished they were upstairs already, in her room. But how to get them there without seeming too eager? Stumped, she decided to give in to her desire and see where it led.
Alice raised her eyes to see Jasper leaning against the newel post at the foot of the stairs, one leg cocked to meet the other at the ankle. Along the way, he'd taken off his boots, and she was charmed to see a small hole in his sock. When she reached his face, his grin was cocky, but his eyes were soft. "Why are you still way over there?" he asked.
"I don't know," she said, looking down as she scuffed the floor with her toe.
"We don't have to do this," he said, trying not to sigh as he shoved his hands even deeper into his pockets.
Her head flew up. "No-I want to," she said. "I just... want to be good for you."
Touched by her nervousness, his heart swelled, leaving no room for doubt or hesitation. It was time for him to take charge of the situation, and to reassure her once and for all. "As long as you're with me, how could it be anything but good?" he said.
Her answering smile was tremulous, but grateful. Pushing off from the door, she moved forward tentatively and carefully, as if walking a tightrope, her eyes never leaving his.
Jasper watched her, realizing she was both composing herself and committing to him with every step. He wanted her to be certain of herself, so he waited, shifting to stand evenly on both feet.
When she stopped, their toes were touching, and he was struck once more by the difference in their sizes as they both looked down. They had been the same height when they first met. Their similarity was part of what had made her brave enough to approach him in the first place, and him brave enough to risk being hassled about befriending a girl. But things were different now. He nudged her foot with his, urging her to look at him.
She sighed softly, reaching for valor as she lifted her chin once more. Leaning toward her, he brought his face near hers, pausing to gauge her reaction. Up close, she was even prettier, and smelled so good. His breath ghosted over her cheek, touching her lips before his own did, a promise of the kiss to come. She shuddered delicately, pushing back her lingering nervousness.
He closed the remaining distance between them, brushing his lips against her forehead and then each of her closed lids in turn. Skating his nose down to the tip of her own, he came to rest with his brow against hers, pausing again. "Alice," he breathed, "stop hiding from me."
They were so close now that she felt her lashes brush his skin when she opened her eyes. She wanted, needed-as anxious to merge with him as if this were a reunion of parted souls. With nothing but an intense expression, he willed her to claim him, once and for all.
Wanting to meet him as an equal, she rose on tiptoe, thinking as always that her height was a disadvantage. (That Jasper found her delicacy alluring was something she had not yet learned.) She pressed her lips to his, gently at first, but more insistently as a spark of lust flared, igniting her blood. She stretched out an arm for balance, resting her fingertips against the wall.
He took her bottom lip between his own, gently prising it from the top one with a soft clicking sound. The tip of his tongue traced just inside her upper lip, and she moaned softly at the taste of his mouth, letting him in.
Their kiss was too much for Jasper, and yet touching her with only his mouth was not enough. Finally, he drew his hands from his pockets to cup her shoulders, holding her in place as he kissed her. Walking one hand to the center of her back, he splayed his fingers wide. His other arm slipped around her waist to lift her off the ground.
Though Alice felt weightless, it had less to do with her physical position than the state of her heart. She had wanted this moment for years, first with only a girl's vague idea of romance, then with the certainty of a young woman who wanted all that life had to offer.
She wrapped her arms around his neck, declaring her need for him. He felt her decision as if she had spoken aloud, and turned, heading for the stairs. As they climbed, she turned her face into the curve of his shoulder, whispering things he could not hear but understood anyway. They were young, but each of them knew that this thing between them was deep and serious.
As they climbed, Alice was far from passive. When her heel banged against the riser of the stairs, she took it as a cue to lift her legs and wrap them around Jasper's waist. He was hard against her, and hot, even through their clothes. She had never been so focused on anything before.
At the top of the stairs, he turned left, moving toward the open door at the end of the hall. The warmth of the low light streaming from the room beckoned him, and he swallowed hard at the enormity of what they were about to do.
Reflexively, Alice squeezed her legs a little tighter, wanting to feel more of him. She felt somewhat removed despite the excitement she felt-almost like a scientist reviewing experimental data or as if she were floating above the surreal moment-but then Jasper groaned, bringing her back to reality with a thud.
She jerked herself closer to him, pressing her mouth to the base of his throat with a soft cry of her own. The sound made his knees wobble, and he found himself bearing her against the wall for stability. With her arms and legs twined around him for support, she made him feel strong and weak all at once. A powerful urge to claim her struck him and he leaned into her, throwing his head back as she gently nipped at his neck.
Though the warmth of her made it difficult for him to think clearly, he knew they either had to slow things down again or finish them in the hallway. Deciding this was too special, he lifted her away from him, setting her on her feet once more. Remembering her earlier hesitance, he sought to reassure her that he wasn't changing his mind.
He put a finger beneath her chin and tilted her head up, reading her face. Her eyes were closed again, but this time she looked almost drugged-her cheeks were flushed and her breath came heavily. Satisfied that she wasn't second-guessing him or where they were headed, he bent to kiss her once more, tasting her, feeling the soft flutter of her lashes against his face. When her eyes opened, they smiled at each other as she took his hand, tugging him down the hall.
For Jasper, entering Alice's room was literally walking into the light, yet nothing was brighter than the glow in her eyes when she looked at him. It occurred to him that she'd always looked at him in that way, even when he'd been too blind to see it, or to realize that he loved her, too. But none of that mattered now. It was time to move forward, to stop looking back.
He turned her to him, taking her face in his hands in a way that belied the urgency he felt. "Alice," he said, kissing her softly.
She reached for his shirt, wanting to finally see and touch what the Henley had hidden. He was tall enough that she needed his help to remove it. While it still covered his face, she launched herself at him, partly as an excuse for touching, but mostly to hide her embarrassment.
Dropping his shirt to the floor, he took one of her hands in his and kissed each of her fingertips before returning her hand to his chest. "I'm glad we don't have to hurry," he said.
Now that she had him in her room, Alice grew bold, urging him on with her roving hands and deep kisses. Her fingers were everywhere, memorizing the feel of his skin and the contour of muscle and bone. For every inch of him she touched, she wanted him that much more. The feeling of addiction made her head spin.
Watching her face, he anticipated what she might be wearing beneath her clothes. Her skin was pale and soft, and he wondered how she would taste. Something to look forward to, he thought. And then her shirt was open and he found himself staring. Before, he'd always considered a bra to be a hindrance, but the one Alice wore was a contradiction. The fabric invited his fingers, the pattern revealing just enough of her skin to drive him mad. He couldn't wait to remove it, but was dying to know what it felt like at the same time.
Almost in slow motion, she watched his hand slip beneath her shirt, sliding it aside. She held her breath, hoping he would touch her there. Impatience got the better of her and she moved to open the front clasp, but he stilled her hands with one of his own. "Let me do this," he said.
So she waited, but not for long. Warm from his pockets, his fingers felt hot against her cool skin, and she shivered, hypersensitive with wanting him. Her eyes followed as he traced the line of her bra, then moved to cup her in his palm. When his other hand came up to mirror the first, her head lolled back, a too-heavy flower on the delicate stem of her neck. He'd barely touched her, and already she was overwhelmed.
Her reactions were fascinating to him; every motion of his hand brought a new response. Though the fabric of her underwear was silky, her skin was even more so. He fumbled for a moment with the clasp, but was rewarded when she spilled into his hands. Wanting never to release her, he struggled for a moment at how to remove her clothing otherwise. He settled for pleading with his eyes for help, as he wasn't sure he could even speak.
Alice complied, slipping the offending clothes from her shoulders and dropping them to the floor. The cool air of the room made her shiver, but his eyes were warm with approval. Tentatively, he moved his thumb, gently rubbing as he watched her reaction. His other hand caressed her, soon slipping around her back to pull her in for a kiss. Soft as they were, the sounds she made drove him on, wanting to see what else she would do.
Her hands smoothed over the hot skin of his chest, appraising the results of the years he'd spent running and working out. His breath hitched when she brushed his nipple, and she smiled against his mouth, loving the feeling of power his reaction gave her. She broke from his mouth to follow her fingers' path with her tongue, tracing his ribs around to his back, where she fanned her fingers out like wings over his shoulder blades before kissing her way down his spine. Touching him like this was intoxicating. Her arms slipped down to wrap around his waist, crossing over his stomach as she pressed herself against him.
Jasper basked in her warm touch, welded in place as she marked him indelibly as hers. He began to pull her around where he could see her again, but she resisted, drawing one hand from his. She reached quickly, intent on his zipper, but he was quicker and caught her in time. "Not yet," he said, though having her hand on him was something he'd dreamt of for weeks. Her hands were small, and it would probably take two of them to grip him tight enough... He groaned, pushing the thought aside as he tried to focus.
Placing her hands at his waist, he turned in her embrace before scooping her up and heading for the bed. "Alice first," he whispered in her ear, making her shiver and gasp. He wanted to make her feel good before giving in to any distracting lust of his own.
Setting Alice on her feet once more, Jasper moved to stand behind her. He leaned down to nuzzle her neck while gliding his fingertips up and down her arms. The gooseflesh he raised made him smile, until his attention was drawn by more immediately enticing parts of her form. He covered her with his hands once more, circling and teasing until she threw her head back with a sigh. Her responses made him bold once more, despite the lingering traces of nervousness he felt. Nuzzling her neck, he drew an excruciatingly slow line from her shoulder to her jaw, then followed the shape of her ear with his nose.
She was panting now, and too focused elsewhere to notice his hands at her waist. Unzipping her jeans, he parted them with his thumbs and moved around in front of her to finish the job. He dropped to one knee, pooling the pants around her ankles, and helped her to step out. Smiling softly, she touched his cheek in thanks. He stayed where he was, appraising her loveliness, reaching up to run his fingertips from her shoulders to the soft skin of her stomach, settling with his palms on her hips.
Alice was ticklish. Though she was squirming inside, she forced herself to remain still so as not to distract Jasper from what he was doing. But whatever the name of this feeling, she loved it. Even more astonishing was the trust she felt while standing mostly naked before him, with no barriers or obstacles between them. She had expected to feel more nervous, but a sense of comfort and peace stole over her instead. Alice supposed this was intimacy, something she had once thought meant sex exclusively.
Jasper felt her quake beneath his fingertips, but attributed it to nerves. He'd expected her to be skittish, despite her eagerness, but this visible sign of her emotions was sobering. He stood, and drew her close, loving the feel of her softness against him. "You're beautiful," he said, "and I'm the only one who's seen you this way."
His words made her bashful, but she faced him anyway, knowing he deserved no less than her full attention. Overcome, she kissed him hard, moving her hands over him to let him know that he was beautiful, too. "Thank you," she said, clinging to more than his words.
Walking backward, he drew her toward the bed, sitting when he reached the edge. He pulled her into his lap, moving her legs to span his thighs. "I've wanted to do this so badly," he breathed, finally touching and tasting the soft skin of her breast. Though he'd been hard for what felt like hours, her wordless cries amplified the sensation until it was nearly painful. When she hitched herself forward, he almost shouted in relief, pulling her hard against him and shifting them both as he continued to adore her with his mouth.
In that moment, their leisurely journey became a headlong dash on a runaway train, sweeping them both along without regard for gentle feelings. Alice pushed Jasper back on the bed, urging him to scoot closer toward the headboard. She removed his socks, one by one, kissing and sucking at the spot on his arch she'd glimpsed through the hole in his sock. Her hands moved to his fly, releasing him from the buttons almost before he knew what had happened. This time she was determined, pulling at his waistband and dragging his jeans and underwear down and off before he could stop her.
She paused for a split second at the foot of the bed to look at Jasper, awed by his masculine form. He had always been lean and well-made, but the contours of his adult body were breathtaking. She wanted to memorize every inch of him with her mouth and hands. His head was thrown back and his eyes were closed, waiting for Alice to return. Under her gaze, his erection strained, desperate for her touch. Obliging their mutual longing, she moved up to settle next to him on her knees.
"Jas," she said, "open your eyes for me. I want to see you."
Blinking rapidly, he focused on the progression of her hands as they moved to soothe the part of him that ached most. Her fingertips were soft against him, tracing his outline before slipping around him fully. When her second hand joined her first, gently squeezing and sliding, he grabbed the comforter instead of clutching her roughly. "More," he said, his voice little more than a croak in the quiet room. She complied, and his hips nearly shot off the bed, thrusting into her grip once and again. It was all that he wanted and more than he could take, all at once. Alice, he thought, this was Alice touching him, making him feel like this. He would give her anything if only she wouldn't stop.
Stop... he remembered his plan to make Alice feel good first, knowing that their first time would be better for him than for her. Blindly, he reached for her, drawing her up to lie on him before rolling them both to their sides. He kissed her, fighting the urge to hitch up her leg and push inside, thinking of puppies and kittens and old, wrinkled grandmothers to bring himself down as he stroked the soft skin of her neck and shoulder.
The silky hardness of him in her hands was amazing-familiar and yet like nothing else. Drunk on heady lust, she wanted to laugh in triumph when he strained against her palms, but she slowed her strokes and squeezed him tighter, drawing out the moment. Though she had no idea of what she was doing, it just felt right.
When he was calmer, he guided her over to lie on her back, moving her legs down to rest on the bed. He removed her underwear, leaning back to look at her. Alice naked was the sexiest, loveliest thing he had ever seen. She reached out to rub his calf with her bare foot, then parted her legs in silent invitation, reaching for his shoulders at the same time. Though she wanted him closer, he was dying to discover new ways to eclipse the passionate sounds she had made.
Her eyes were wide as she watched him lean down to kiss her, worrying about things that had no importance until he reached his destination. At the warmth of his mouth, a wave of stimulation swept over her, something she'd hardly dared to fantasize about. Alice forgot to be rational then, giving in to her senses as his fingers and tongue drove her onward. He was gentle at first, and then insistent, urging her to respond to his wordless demands. She met him head-on, first whispering, then whimpering for release, crying out in frustration when she felt that she couldn't reach her climax without him inside her.
Jasper could no more resist Alice's pleas than she could resist his, and moved up to cover her body with his own. They were protected, so his only consideration was that it might hurt her. Years of gymnastics had done part of the job, so it would only be a matter of her becoming accustomed to his size, or so he hoped.
"Please, Jas," she said, her voice trailing off as she softly bucked her hips against him.
"Look at me," said Jasper, moving against her in readiness. There would be no going back after this. Slowly, he slipped inside, her tight wetness making him want to thrust in, hard. But this was Alice, whom he loved. He wanted her to feel good, too.
He eased forward, bringing his fingers to her, rubbing soft circles to bring her along. She clung to him, inside and out, moving with him until he filled her, unable to look away from the concentration that knit his brow. The discomfort soon gave way to pleasure, and tracing his cheek with her fingers, she smiled, letting him know she felt good, urging him to continue with a push of her hips. She gasped when he moved in further, hardly believing how good it felt, despite a fading wash of pain from the unfamiliar invasion. When he said her name, she was lost.
They moved together, rolling like the tide against a shore, soft and slow at first, but picking up speed along with their racing hearts. When he knew he wouldn't last much longer, he redoubled the efforts of his fingers, stroking and teasing her as she cried out again and again. She clutched him and stiffened beneath him, clenching her eyes shut as she came, and he thrust twice more and followed, groaning as he slumped against her.
Alice held him close, stroking the sweat-dampened waves of his hair. He was so quiet that it almost alarmed her, but she was reassured by the feeling of his heartbeat against her. "You're beautiful," she said, "and I'm the only one who's seen you this way."
Jasper smiled against her shoulder. "Thank god we have forever."
"And that we both hate skiing," she said, smiling as she felt him stir against her once more.
Chapter Three
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