Comments | twilight20: FF: By Fearing to Attempt (1/1)

aerial312 in twilight20

FF: By Fearing to Attempt (1/1)

May 25, 2009 01:29

Title: By Fearing to Attempt (1/1)
Author: Aerial312
Rating: PG-13
Characters/Pairings: Alice/Jasper
Table/Prompt: Epsilon/Survival
Word Count: 2, 046
Summary: Alice takes Jasper hunting for the first time.
Timeline: Two days after Alice and Jasper meet in Philadelphia.

( Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt. )

Comments 3

sirenprincess May 30 2009, 05:31:31 UTC

I really liked this one. It amazes me how much our versions have in common. My Alice was a vegetarian for 28 years as well. She taught Jasper the first day. I agree completely that Jasper would be ashamed of hunting in front of Alice at first and would be VERY meticulous about blood on him.

This was my favorite part:

I bit my lip. I hated seeing him in so much pain, even though it was already a common occurrence. Jasper's pain ran deep. Much deeper than I'd realized in the visions. Even that little amount of blood had made him very anxious. I was pretty sure he didn't want me to see his hands covered in blood, regardless of its source.

I like how you acknowledge just how deep Jasper's pain is. And your Alice knows so much about Jasper, but still didn't realize the extent in her visions. I love it.

Your stories are always great. Love it.

aerial312 May 30 2009, 18:10:15 UTC

I'm glad you liked it. I love writing this super early stuff. I learn so much about the characters. I realized that 6 of my stories take place in the first month after they met, and I don't think I'm done with that time frame.

sirenprincess May 31 2009, 03:34:53 UTC

I love that time frame, too! Especially, especially from your stories!!! What I particularly like is that Jasper is forced to admit things to Alice. Later on, Alice already knows so there's no need to discuss it. Early on, sometimes they have to have discussions about things Jasper would be ashamed to admit.