On Living with Cerebral Palsy
As most of you probably know, I suffer from Cerebral Palsy (CP). It isn't something I generally talk about, but I've decided to put down in words some of my past and present experiences of living with CP. I may have mentioned portions of this before, but I think this is the first time I've actually thought through all of this.
How it affects me
I was born with brain damage to the right hemisphere of my brain and this has impaired the development and my control of the left side of my body. I can always tell my left side from my right because my left side feels "different" kind of like numbness, but not. It is kind of tingling sensation. I usually feel it strongest in my ring and little finger and my foot, but it is all over my left side.
My left leg, foot, and walking
I have no control over the toes on my left foot and very little control over my left ankle. My left foot is also noticeably smaller than my right so I just fit my right foot and live with the fact that I can't fit my left. My left leg is a different length than my right and the hip is a different position as well.
I walk with a limp, and I always have to think about walking (it isn't an automatic thing). This makes walking and doing something else somewhat difficult. I always end up looking down so I can see my feet to help prevent tripping. If I'm tired, it becomes difficult to lift the left leg and my ankle will drop my foot and I often trip on the cracks in the sidewalk since I don't know where my toe is relative to the ground. The different lengths and position of my hips means I can't stand up straight.
Walking up stairs isn't too difficult, but walking down stairs, I usually have to take one step at a time (putting both feet on each step) because otherwise, I feel like I'm going to fall over. This can make the people behind me rather impatient since I walk down stairs rather slow.
My left arm and hand
The fingers on my left hand are a shorter (by about a quarter of an inch) than the fingers on my right hand. Also, I have very little independent control over them. The only ones I can consistently independently control are my thumb and forefinger. I have some control over the middle finger and trying to move my ring finger usually moves the little finger as well. So, when I type, I really only use the thumb and forefinger of my left hand. As a result, I don't do things like IM, since typing is kind of difficult.
My left arm doesn't go straight. It locks in position about 30 degrees from being straight.
On Growing Up with CP
I was first diagnosed with CP when I was three, after I suffered a Grand Mal seizure. So, I was also diagnosed with epilepsy (which I don't suffer from anymore). So, I was prescribed phenobarbital until I stopped taking it at 16 (which I might discuss at a later date).
I spent kindergarten on crutches, since the doctors put casts on one or both of my legs (and operated on my left leg, leaving a long scar on the back of my calf) in the hopes of getting the legs to the same length. Needless to say, this was not a fun experience.
Since I had little control over my left foot, when walking it would naturally curve inwards and I would walk on the instep and side of my foot. Only after many years of physiotherapy (which I hated every minute of and cursed my therapist regularly) could I walk somewhat normally. I still walk more on the inside of my foot so I wear down that portion of my shoes first.
I also suffered from speech problems, in particular I had difficulty with the letter "s". I spent quite some time in speech therapy and now I don't have any problems with the letter "s", but I still have difficulty speaking from time to time.
Growing up, I found I had difficulty with anger management and as a result got into a few fights including one with one of my best friends. I moved part way through grade 7 and at my new school, many people decided to try and pick on me so I got into a considerable number of fights. High school wasn't any better. Note that after the move, none of the fights were actually instigated by me, but I still had anger management problems which didn't really get better until I discovered Zen.
This has been fairly long so I'll stop there.
How it affects me
I was born with brain damage to the right hemisphere of my brain and this has impaired the development and my control of the left side of my body. I can always tell my left side from my right because my left side feels "different" kind of like numbness, but not. It is kind of tingling sensation. I usually feel it strongest in my ring and little finger and my foot, but it is all over my left side.
My left leg, foot, and walking
I have no control over the toes on my left foot and very little control over my left ankle. My left foot is also noticeably smaller than my right so I just fit my right foot and live with the fact that I can't fit my left. My left leg is a different length than my right and the hip is a different position as well.
I walk with a limp, and I always have to think about walking (it isn't an automatic thing). This makes walking and doing something else somewhat difficult. I always end up looking down so I can see my feet to help prevent tripping. If I'm tired, it becomes difficult to lift the left leg and my ankle will drop my foot and I often trip on the cracks in the sidewalk since I don't know where my toe is relative to the ground. The different lengths and position of my hips means I can't stand up straight.
Walking up stairs isn't too difficult, but walking down stairs, I usually have to take one step at a time (putting both feet on each step) because otherwise, I feel like I'm going to fall over. This can make the people behind me rather impatient since I walk down stairs rather slow.
My left arm and hand
The fingers on my left hand are a shorter (by about a quarter of an inch) than the fingers on my right hand. Also, I have very little independent control over them. The only ones I can consistently independently control are my thumb and forefinger. I have some control over the middle finger and trying to move my ring finger usually moves the little finger as well. So, when I type, I really only use the thumb and forefinger of my left hand. As a result, I don't do things like IM, since typing is kind of difficult.
My left arm doesn't go straight. It locks in position about 30 degrees from being straight.
On Growing Up with CP
I was first diagnosed with CP when I was three, after I suffered a Grand Mal seizure. So, I was also diagnosed with epilepsy (which I don't suffer from anymore). So, I was prescribed phenobarbital until I stopped taking it at 16 (which I might discuss at a later date).
I spent kindergarten on crutches, since the doctors put casts on one or both of my legs (and operated on my left leg, leaving a long scar on the back of my calf) in the hopes of getting the legs to the same length. Needless to say, this was not a fun experience.
Since I had little control over my left foot, when walking it would naturally curve inwards and I would walk on the instep and side of my foot. Only after many years of physiotherapy (which I hated every minute of and cursed my therapist regularly) could I walk somewhat normally. I still walk more on the inside of my foot so I wear down that portion of my shoes first.
I also suffered from speech problems, in particular I had difficulty with the letter "s". I spent quite some time in speech therapy and now I don't have any problems with the letter "s", but I still have difficulty speaking from time to time.
Growing up, I found I had difficulty with anger management and as a result got into a few fights including one with one of my best friends. I moved part way through grade 7 and at my new school, many people decided to try and pick on me so I got into a considerable number of fights. High school wasn't any better. Note that after the move, none of the fights were actually instigated by me, but I still had anger management problems which didn't really get better until I discovered Zen.
This has been fairly long so I'll stop there.