I am posting again, cause I don't want to go back to bed. I have been by myself for so long and it's starting to effect me both pysically and mentaly. I can't remember a time when I have been by myself for this long, everyday seems to be a struggle. I don't know what to do about it. Mum is starting to worry that I might do somthing to myself if I'm ( Read more... )

I can't stand it anymore. I'm so alone. I've never been this low. no one seems to care. I don't have anything to live for. nothing to look forward to. It hurts so much.

oh god i'm lonely, I've pushed everyone away, No matter what I do I can't seem to stop myself from thinking of her, then I cry. There hasn't been a day in which I havn't. these pills don't seem to help. I have lost about 6kgs in the last month cause I'm not eating, I don't know what to do anymore and I'm scared.

I have lost the love of my life ( Read more... )

I'm glad everyone else enjoyed christmas caused mine sucked like usual. This people I hate to associate with was bad and all I got for christmas was $50 and whats worse I didn't even get drunk. I'm so glad christmas is over. I think this has to be the worst christmas ever. Even though I hated it I still hope every one else had a good one. Merry

Today was the most boring christmas eve I have ever had, I was dragged to my mums for a christmas dinner but it was so boring. even my neice's were bored. I'm so glad I'm home now, But tommorow might even be worse I am going to my sisters and I don't want to be mean but they arn't the brightest family in the world. SO I'm really looking forward to ( Read more... )

I feel like you used me, I thought it was too good to be true. I sometimes doubt u ever really loved me. If u did love me I wouldn't be writing this and you would be right here next to me. I feel that all I was to you was what u called your particular, someone that could be there for u but when things got tough you could just dump. I was always ( Read more... )

Another entry only cause I can't sleep, it's been happening for a while now. Even reading doesn't help I think I've read like 200 pages trying to fall asleep. I might clean my room to wear myself out or read a bit more. Nothing on t.v and I don't want to drag the ps2 into my room again. I prolly fall asleep sometime but I won't get much sleep I ( Read more... )

I'm still thinking as clear as I have in ages, I can't remember the the last time I could sit down and read a novel ( Read more... )

Well another entry, I think the pills are working cause I've never felt this clear in ages. I think the situation with jelva was good for me. and fuck me I really want to be friends again, you know buddys that u can share anything with. I am starting to feel good again. I am still in love her and I care a lot but I'm not in any hurry to get back ( Read more... )