Everything is fine, but I need to vent...

[tylerdurton]

I struggle a lot with holding back certain emotions. If I don't hold back I would come off as too clingy and obsessive. What reason do I have to be so insecure when everything is going fine? It is so difficult to remain confident. It feels like at times maybe I'm holding back too much, but I'm just afraid of making the same mistakes I have in the past. She is different though, I know that, that's what's so amazing about her. I can actually trust her, she has been a good friend to me for many years, so I know I can trust her even now. I guess it is more of an issue of trusting myself to trust her and to trust what we have. She means so much to me and I would do anything for her, but I can't help but wonder if she even likes me that much. Of course I don't let these insecurities show, I'm afraid talking to her about this would only bother her.

I have a bad track record that I'm trying to make up for. I want this time around to last as long as I can make it, so I'm taking it slow and watching my step. Unfortunately it's a little demoralizing watching the ground all the time.

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