I really should have told you sooner, but I had the plan with Jeff to hold it off until after prom so that the ..friction wouldn't be so bad. I really didn't want to tell you at all, I wanted her to tell you. It would have been better for her to tell you. I've made quite a few enemies over this thing, but I hope you're okay above all that. I don't want to lose a friend to keep friends with people so dishonest and selfish to those they claim to love (especially when both those were considered friends). You're still a friend to me, one I care about as I care about all of them so much. I didn't want her to hurt you. I didn't want her to be the one doing the hurting to you and herself. I didn't want her to play you like she had played the others, you're different after all--you're my friend too
( ... )
I know that with my short temper and blatant ignorance that shows up when I get mad, I shouldn't put my two cents in, but I will.
I've kept an open mind with you, and even now I'm not raising my voice (in my head as I type this, that is), but I'm curious now. Don't get the wrong idea and think that I'm being an ass, because I'm very calm at the moment.
I don't know the whole story, and I don't know what you've said to him about posting in the community, but I'm not setting out to get it, because it doesn't need to be any of my business. And, yes, maybe that biases my opinion in the wrong direction. I don't know. Regardless of whether or not it was just a venting tool, writing what you did shows that that was what was going on in your head. That's what was dwelling in you, in your heart at the time. That's what the community is for. Getting things off your chest in writing, so that at least someone can read it, even if they're complete strangers. After all, they won't say anything or think twice about it
( ... )
I'd have to disagree. Because when things are in writing, they can be open to misinterpretation. Saying that I didn't regret the kiss was one of those things. If I had explained it more, then perhaps it wouldn't have been misunderstood, but perhaps it still would have. That statement simply meant that if it had happened at another time, say before Justin and I had started going out, it would have been perfectly okay...but the timing was terribly terribly flawed. It meant that it shouldn't have happened when it did.
And as far as what I'm sorry for: I WAS PLANNING TO TELL HIM. I'm not going to got into a big huge discussion about all of that again. I refuse to. But as far as that goes, I'm sorry that it happened, not that I got caught...since I was going to tell him in the first place.
I usually don't suffer from misinterpretation. And, considering that I kinda got what you meant, read what you have now said about it, and still don't like it, means that I probably didn't misinterpret it. Why don't I like it? Because I would have never, ever, ever thought of even being with anyone, even in a before time, while I was with you. But you could. So there was something wrong there. And you can say that you were planning until your face turns blue, but no one can know it for sure. Because you didn't.
Random thoughts
anonymous
May 17 2005, 21:43:59 UTC
Hey
I don't know quite what to say as a comment to all this, but I will say this:
I think it's good that you have a definite response either "yes" or "no". There is nothing worse than waiting and wondering what someone else is deciding. And, not that it matters, but I support/agree with you in your decision. Better not to leave yourself vulnerable to any more hurt than what was already caused.
Who knows, maybe this will be a learning experience for her.
I'm sorry you had to find out like that... that has to be rough.
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There's nothing she can say to justify things, especially now.
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I've kept an open mind with you, and even now I'm not raising my voice (in my head as I type this, that is), but I'm curious now. Don't get the wrong idea and think that I'm being an ass, because I'm very calm at the moment.
I don't know the whole story, and I don't know what you've said to him about posting in the community, but I'm not setting out to get it, because it doesn't need to be any of my business. And, yes, maybe that biases my opinion in the wrong direction. I don't know. Regardless of whether or not it was just a venting tool, writing what you did shows that that was what was going on in your head. That's what was dwelling in you, in your heart at the time. That's what the community is for. Getting things off your chest in writing, so that at least someone can read it, even if they're complete strangers. After all, they won't say anything or think twice about it ( ... )
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And as far as what I'm sorry for: I WAS PLANNING TO TELL HIM. I'm not going to got into a big huge discussion about all of that again. I refuse to. But as far as that goes, I'm sorry that it happened, not that I got caught...since I was going to tell him in the first place.
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And you can say that you were planning until your face turns blue, but no one can know it for sure. Because you didn't.
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I don't know quite what to say as a comment to all this, but I will say this:
I think it's good that you have a definite response either "yes" or "no". There is nothing worse than waiting and wondering what someone else is deciding. And, not that it matters, but I support/agree with you in your decision. Better not to leave yourself vulnerable to any more hurt than what was already caused.
Who knows, maybe this will be a learning experience for her.
I'm sorry you had to find out like that... that has to be rough.
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And thanks for the support.
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