Compromise | PG | The Closer
Title: Compromise
Prompt: Boundaries were going to drive her crazy.
Fandom: Brenda/Sharon, The Closer
Requested by: imustgofirst
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1995
Disclaimer: Not mine. Wish they were. Please don't sue.
Author's Note: This is just a little something that I wrote for my valentine, imustgofirst. The prompt for this story was “jinx.” It’s been a while since I’ve written anything on my own for this fandom, so I’m a little (a lot) nervous. Comments would be greatly appreciated. Enjoy!
-
At precisely twelve minutes past noon, Brenda Leigh retrieved her cell phone from the bowels of her bottomless purse. She chewed at her lip and ignored the waxy taste of lipstick on her tongue, focusing instead on the name on her screen. Her stomach rumbled; upon further reflection, she remembered that she’d skipped breakfast again, but her current task was far more important than her daily nutritional intake. Her thumb hovered hesitantly. If this worked out, she’d be fed and in good company.
Twelve minutes-no, thirteen now- was as good as her resolve was going to get. Yesterday she had only lasted two, and she wasn’t keen on coming across as desperate.
Even if she was a little desperate.
She tapped the screen and held the phone to her ear. On the third ring, a brisk “hello” echoed in Brenda’s ear.
“Hello to you too,” she said, sitting back in her chair. She’d instantly warmed at hearing the cool, familiar cadence of that voice, even if it greeted her in a less-than-pleased tone. “How come you don’t ever sound happy to hear from me?”
There was a sigh before Sharon Raydor replied, “You know that I’m always happy to hear from you, Brenda. I’m in the middle of work.”
“It’s noon,” Brenda announced, as if it should have been perfectly obvious. “Aren’t you on lunch?”
“I’m working through lunch,” Sharon answered, and Brenda could hear the rustle of papers in the background.
“Of course you are. You need to eat.”
“I am eating.”
Brenda narrowed her eyes. “Earl Gray and a protein bar don’t count, Sharon.” There was a pause and Brenda smirked, knowing she had been correct. “I think you should let me take you to lunch.”
“As nice as that sounds, I should really use this time productively. Rusty has a chemistry test tomorrow; I promised to help him study.”
“Forty-five whole minutes isn’t gonna make much of a difference, is it?” The blonde picked at a hangnail, the sting far less unpleasant than Sharon’s rejection.
“I just don’t think it’s a good idea, Brenda.”
“Why not though? You’re not on an actual case and Rusty’s in school…”
Sharon cleared her throat. “It’s not that.” Her voice was quiet, mollifying almost, as if she were trying to gently let down a child whose heart had been set on going to the toy store.
The blonde waited, frustrated by the answering silence, her discomfort mounting. “Wanna tell me what it is then?”
“We just went out last night, Brenda Leigh. Do you really think it’s wise to have a lunch date immediately following a dinner date?”
Despite the nagging desire to point out that they ate more of each other than their dinner the night before, Brenda refrained, knowing it would only fuel Sharon’s ridiculous argument. “I’m not followin’ you, Shar. I wanna see you.”
“I know. I want to see you too, but we have plans tomorrow night. We’ll see each other then.”
Brenda gave an exaggerated eye roll. “That’s not ‘til tomorrow. If we both wanna see each other, why should we wait?” There was another pause, and Brenda could clearly picture the brunette sitting in the office that formerly belonged to her, worrying her lip and tracing the rim of her fancy tea cup. Brenda heard the clink of glass and imagined her Captain Raydor setting the cup down on its little saucer. She smiled-who brought tea cups and saucers to work?-and felt a warmth bloom in her chest. She missed the woman, and it had only been less than a day since she’d seen her. She let out an impatient sigh. “What’s really goin’ on?”
“We haven’t been seeing each other for very long. I think…it would probably be wise if we didn’t rush things.”
“I fail to see how havin’ lunch together is rushin’.”
“You don’t think we’re moving too fast?”
“No.” She caught on, frowning a little. “But you do.”
Sharon exhaled slowly through her nose. “I don’t know. We’re woman of a certain age…we shouldn’t be acting like teenagers.”
“Where are you gettin’ your datin’ tips? Dr. Phil?” She shifted in the uncomfortable chair, longing for the far more comfortable visitor’s chair in Sharon’s office. “I don’t think that this has to be something that we worry about. We’re adults, Sharon. We should be settin’ our own pace, not tryin’ to follow someone else’s.”
“I’m following my own pace, Brenda.”
“Shouldn’t my pace count too?”
“We agreed to take this slowly. If I’m setting boundaries that you’re uncomfortable with, it’s only because I care about us and want us to succeed.”
Brenda bit her cheek hard, tasting the metallic tang of blood, and swallowed the comment that had been ready on her tongue. In Brenda’s opinion, maintaining a schedule and following a certain set of rules did not a successful relationship make. The underlying implication-that Sharon cared more than Brenda did-seemed unnecessarily unfair, but the younger woman suspected that the captain’s motive was not a malicious one. She remembered how guarded Sharon had been the night prior, after they’d made love, and recalled the ever-so-subtle hesitation in the woman’s voice before she’d declined her lunch invitation.
Sharon was afraid.
Before Brenda could form a reply, the shrill ring of a telephone sounded in Sharon’s office. Sharon interjected once more. “Listen, Brenda, I’m getting a call from Chief Pope. I’ll call you tonight and we can discuss this later. I do want to see you, Brenda Leigh. I just think we should wait.”
The blonde sighed. “All right. I’ll talk-“
And Sharon hung up.
Brenda Leigh frowned, dropped her cell back into her purse, and stood. She peered around the busy lobby of the LAPD, her brown eyes catching the clock face. It was twenty-two past noon. She still had plenty of time.
-
After five minutes of listening to Chief Pope’s blathering about the appropriate use of overtime, Sharon Raydor pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. She was annoyed-with Pope, with the gnawing hunger that had not been satiated by a granola bar, and mostly with her own stubborn pride.
She had wanted to accept Brenda’s invitation. As soon as she had seen the woman’s name light up the screen of her iPhone, her stomach had coiled in pleasant anticipation at the possibility of seeing her. The reaction had been instantaneous, a sensation that was altogether new and attributed entirely to the blonde.
It wasn’t the newness of their relationship that scared her-it was the fact that she simply wanted to spend all of her free time with her girlfriend, and the very thought made her feel desperate and co-dependent. She had assumed that she had outgrown that stage of her life now that she was rapidly approaching sixty.
She had been wrong.
Sharon hadn’t always lived by her head rather than her heart, but one failed marriage and a string of disastrous relationships had forced her to rethink her approach. With Brenda, everything felt right, and that was more terrifying than anything.
No, she told herself, she had done the right thing. Boundaries were good. Boundaries were healthy.
Boundaries were going to drive her crazy.
Jumping in with both feet had always gotten her into trouble. Whether they liked it or not, she was going to ease into this relationship inch by agonizing inch.
Brandishing her reading glasses, Sharon fixed her attention back on the paperwork in front of her. Her stomach gave another rumble, as if to contribute its disapproval of her stern approach. She huffed.
A flurry of excitement outside the Murder Room barely gained Sharon’s notice; her team was no doubt returning from their lunch breaks (albeit a little early). She wouldn’t have looked up if she hadn’t heard the clacking of heels.
There was a quick rap at her door. “Hey Captain, look who I found lurking in the halls!” Tao announced, stepping aside to reveal a flushed, smiling Brenda Leigh Johnson.
“Thankfully the lieutenant here was around to let me in, or I’d have been wanderin’ around like some kind of stalker.” Brenda smiled pleasantly at the lieutenant, a paper bag crinkling where she clutched it against her chest. “I was in the neighborhood.”
“So I see,” the captain said evenly, even though her heart hammered at the sight of her. “Would you excuse us, Lieutenant Tao?”
“Of course.” He nodded. “Good to see you, Chief.”
Sharon watched as the blonde entered the office, closing the door behind her. She took off her glasses once more, setting them atop the stack of papers before her. “Brenda-“
“You said on the phone that you didn’t wanna have lunch,” Brenda quickly interrupted, stepping toward the desk to set down the paper bag, “and I respect that, but you’ve still got to eat. I grabbed you a chicken wrap and an iced tea. I hope that’s okay.”
Sharon looked at the paper bag and then up at Brenda, whose pale face was guarded and undeniably beautiful. “You didn’t have to go to the trouble,” the captain finally said.
“It wasn’t any trouble. I was down in the lobby when I called,” Brenda admitted, “only I thought you’d take me up on my offer, not turn me down cold.”
“You were so sure I would say yes?”
Brenda gave a sheepish grin. “I hoped you would. I thought I might be able to convince you…but even I’m wrong sometimes.” She quickly held up a hand. “I know-I’m admittin’ I’m wrong. Enjoy it while it lasts, ‘cause it’s not gonna happen again any time soon.
The captain smirked. “It’s not that I didn’t want to see you, Brenda. This wasn’t meant as some sort of veiled rejection.”
“I know you wanted to see me. I could hear it in your voice.” Uninvited, Brenda sat down, setting her purse in her lap before she tilted her head in consideration of the captain. “You put up a tough front, but deep down I just think you’re a little scared. This is new for both of us…but I’m tellin’ you right now, we’re not gonna jinx anythin’ by spendin’ time together.”
“You seem to have me all figured out.”
“I know you, Sharon. You’re tryin’ to stick to some sort of script because rules are comfortable, but this is our relationship. We write the script.” She smiled. “I don’t know about you, but I kinda like not knowin’ what’s on the next page.”
Sharon leaned back in her chair, observing her reaction to the other woman. Every atom in her body screamed for Brenda, ached for her-what good was setting a boundary if her heart didn’t truly want to honor it? “Perhaps you’re right.” She sighed. “I’m not ready to just…jump into this. I can be a little more flexible, but I need you to also respect whatever limits I need to set.”
“I can do that, so long as you’re settin’ limits because that’s what you need, not what you think you should be doin’.”
A knot in Sharon’s gut loosened, and a rush of exhilarating freedom immediately washed over her. “Fair enough.” It was strange, this turning off of her brain to allow her heart to take over. She wouldn’t-couldn’t-ignore it completely, but she was willing to compromise.
Brenda peered at the clock, the corner of her mouth drooping into a frown. “I should get goin’ so you can eat your lunch.”
“Already?” Sharon asked, surprising herself.
The other woman raised an eyebrow, getting to her feet. “Hey, I’m tryin’ to respect your boundaries.”
“I…appreciate that.” Before Brenda could turn for the door, Sharon said, “Brenda?”
“Yeah?”
“I assume you got yourself something to eat as well?”
Brenda patted her ubiquitous black purse. “Of course. I figured I’d eat when I got back to the office.”
“Why don’t you join me?”
“Really?”
Sharon’s smile was genuine. Without hesitation, she nodded. “Really.”
---
Prompt: Boundaries were going to drive her crazy.
Fandom: Brenda/Sharon, The Closer
Requested by: imustgofirst
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1995
Disclaimer: Not mine. Wish they were. Please don't sue.
Author's Note: This is just a little something that I wrote for my valentine, imustgofirst. The prompt for this story was “jinx.” It’s been a while since I’ve written anything on my own for this fandom, so I’m a little (a lot) nervous. Comments would be greatly appreciated. Enjoy!
-
At precisely twelve minutes past noon, Brenda Leigh retrieved her cell phone from the bowels of her bottomless purse. She chewed at her lip and ignored the waxy taste of lipstick on her tongue, focusing instead on the name on her screen. Her stomach rumbled; upon further reflection, she remembered that she’d skipped breakfast again, but her current task was far more important than her daily nutritional intake. Her thumb hovered hesitantly. If this worked out, she’d be fed and in good company.
Twelve minutes-no, thirteen now- was as good as her resolve was going to get. Yesterday she had only lasted two, and she wasn’t keen on coming across as desperate.
Even if she was a little desperate.
She tapped the screen and held the phone to her ear. On the third ring, a brisk “hello” echoed in Brenda’s ear.
“Hello to you too,” she said, sitting back in her chair. She’d instantly warmed at hearing the cool, familiar cadence of that voice, even if it greeted her in a less-than-pleased tone. “How come you don’t ever sound happy to hear from me?”
There was a sigh before Sharon Raydor replied, “You know that I’m always happy to hear from you, Brenda. I’m in the middle of work.”
“It’s noon,” Brenda announced, as if it should have been perfectly obvious. “Aren’t you on lunch?”
“I’m working through lunch,” Sharon answered, and Brenda could hear the rustle of papers in the background.
“Of course you are. You need to eat.”
“I am eating.”
Brenda narrowed her eyes. “Earl Gray and a protein bar don’t count, Sharon.” There was a pause and Brenda smirked, knowing she had been correct. “I think you should let me take you to lunch.”
“As nice as that sounds, I should really use this time productively. Rusty has a chemistry test tomorrow; I promised to help him study.”
“Forty-five whole minutes isn’t gonna make much of a difference, is it?” The blonde picked at a hangnail, the sting far less unpleasant than Sharon’s rejection.
“I just don’t think it’s a good idea, Brenda.”
“Why not though? You’re not on an actual case and Rusty’s in school…”
Sharon cleared her throat. “It’s not that.” Her voice was quiet, mollifying almost, as if she were trying to gently let down a child whose heart had been set on going to the toy store.
The blonde waited, frustrated by the answering silence, her discomfort mounting. “Wanna tell me what it is then?”
“We just went out last night, Brenda Leigh. Do you really think it’s wise to have a lunch date immediately following a dinner date?”
Despite the nagging desire to point out that they ate more of each other than their dinner the night before, Brenda refrained, knowing it would only fuel Sharon’s ridiculous argument. “I’m not followin’ you, Shar. I wanna see you.”
“I know. I want to see you too, but we have plans tomorrow night. We’ll see each other then.”
Brenda gave an exaggerated eye roll. “That’s not ‘til tomorrow. If we both wanna see each other, why should we wait?” There was another pause, and Brenda could clearly picture the brunette sitting in the office that formerly belonged to her, worrying her lip and tracing the rim of her fancy tea cup. Brenda heard the clink of glass and imagined her Captain Raydor setting the cup down on its little saucer. She smiled-who brought tea cups and saucers to work?-and felt a warmth bloom in her chest. She missed the woman, and it had only been less than a day since she’d seen her. She let out an impatient sigh. “What’s really goin’ on?”
“We haven’t been seeing each other for very long. I think…it would probably be wise if we didn’t rush things.”
“I fail to see how havin’ lunch together is rushin’.”
“You don’t think we’re moving too fast?”
“No.” She caught on, frowning a little. “But you do.”
Sharon exhaled slowly through her nose. “I don’t know. We’re woman of a certain age…we shouldn’t be acting like teenagers.”
“Where are you gettin’ your datin’ tips? Dr. Phil?” She shifted in the uncomfortable chair, longing for the far more comfortable visitor’s chair in Sharon’s office. “I don’t think that this has to be something that we worry about. We’re adults, Sharon. We should be settin’ our own pace, not tryin’ to follow someone else’s.”
“I’m following my own pace, Brenda.”
“Shouldn’t my pace count too?”
“We agreed to take this slowly. If I’m setting boundaries that you’re uncomfortable with, it’s only because I care about us and want us to succeed.”
Brenda bit her cheek hard, tasting the metallic tang of blood, and swallowed the comment that had been ready on her tongue. In Brenda’s opinion, maintaining a schedule and following a certain set of rules did not a successful relationship make. The underlying implication-that Sharon cared more than Brenda did-seemed unnecessarily unfair, but the younger woman suspected that the captain’s motive was not a malicious one. She remembered how guarded Sharon had been the night prior, after they’d made love, and recalled the ever-so-subtle hesitation in the woman’s voice before she’d declined her lunch invitation.
Sharon was afraid.
Before Brenda could form a reply, the shrill ring of a telephone sounded in Sharon’s office. Sharon interjected once more. “Listen, Brenda, I’m getting a call from Chief Pope. I’ll call you tonight and we can discuss this later. I do want to see you, Brenda Leigh. I just think we should wait.”
The blonde sighed. “All right. I’ll talk-“
And Sharon hung up.
Brenda Leigh frowned, dropped her cell back into her purse, and stood. She peered around the busy lobby of the LAPD, her brown eyes catching the clock face. It was twenty-two past noon. She still had plenty of time.
-
After five minutes of listening to Chief Pope’s blathering about the appropriate use of overtime, Sharon Raydor pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. She was annoyed-with Pope, with the gnawing hunger that had not been satiated by a granola bar, and mostly with her own stubborn pride.
She had wanted to accept Brenda’s invitation. As soon as she had seen the woman’s name light up the screen of her iPhone, her stomach had coiled in pleasant anticipation at the possibility of seeing her. The reaction had been instantaneous, a sensation that was altogether new and attributed entirely to the blonde.
It wasn’t the newness of their relationship that scared her-it was the fact that she simply wanted to spend all of her free time with her girlfriend, and the very thought made her feel desperate and co-dependent. She had assumed that she had outgrown that stage of her life now that she was rapidly approaching sixty.
She had been wrong.
Sharon hadn’t always lived by her head rather than her heart, but one failed marriage and a string of disastrous relationships had forced her to rethink her approach. With Brenda, everything felt right, and that was more terrifying than anything.
No, she told herself, she had done the right thing. Boundaries were good. Boundaries were healthy.
Boundaries were going to drive her crazy.
Jumping in with both feet had always gotten her into trouble. Whether they liked it or not, she was going to ease into this relationship inch by agonizing inch.
Brandishing her reading glasses, Sharon fixed her attention back on the paperwork in front of her. Her stomach gave another rumble, as if to contribute its disapproval of her stern approach. She huffed.
A flurry of excitement outside the Murder Room barely gained Sharon’s notice; her team was no doubt returning from their lunch breaks (albeit a little early). She wouldn’t have looked up if she hadn’t heard the clacking of heels.
There was a quick rap at her door. “Hey Captain, look who I found lurking in the halls!” Tao announced, stepping aside to reveal a flushed, smiling Brenda Leigh Johnson.
“Thankfully the lieutenant here was around to let me in, or I’d have been wanderin’ around like some kind of stalker.” Brenda smiled pleasantly at the lieutenant, a paper bag crinkling where she clutched it against her chest. “I was in the neighborhood.”
“So I see,” the captain said evenly, even though her heart hammered at the sight of her. “Would you excuse us, Lieutenant Tao?”
“Of course.” He nodded. “Good to see you, Chief.”
Sharon watched as the blonde entered the office, closing the door behind her. She took off her glasses once more, setting them atop the stack of papers before her. “Brenda-“
“You said on the phone that you didn’t wanna have lunch,” Brenda quickly interrupted, stepping toward the desk to set down the paper bag, “and I respect that, but you’ve still got to eat. I grabbed you a chicken wrap and an iced tea. I hope that’s okay.”
Sharon looked at the paper bag and then up at Brenda, whose pale face was guarded and undeniably beautiful. “You didn’t have to go to the trouble,” the captain finally said.
“It wasn’t any trouble. I was down in the lobby when I called,” Brenda admitted, “only I thought you’d take me up on my offer, not turn me down cold.”
“You were so sure I would say yes?”
Brenda gave a sheepish grin. “I hoped you would. I thought I might be able to convince you…but even I’m wrong sometimes.” She quickly held up a hand. “I know-I’m admittin’ I’m wrong. Enjoy it while it lasts, ‘cause it’s not gonna happen again any time soon.
The captain smirked. “It’s not that I didn’t want to see you, Brenda. This wasn’t meant as some sort of veiled rejection.”
“I know you wanted to see me. I could hear it in your voice.” Uninvited, Brenda sat down, setting her purse in her lap before she tilted her head in consideration of the captain. “You put up a tough front, but deep down I just think you’re a little scared. This is new for both of us…but I’m tellin’ you right now, we’re not gonna jinx anythin’ by spendin’ time together.”
“You seem to have me all figured out.”
“I know you, Sharon. You’re tryin’ to stick to some sort of script because rules are comfortable, but this is our relationship. We write the script.” She smiled. “I don’t know about you, but I kinda like not knowin’ what’s on the next page.”
Sharon leaned back in her chair, observing her reaction to the other woman. Every atom in her body screamed for Brenda, ached for her-what good was setting a boundary if her heart didn’t truly want to honor it? “Perhaps you’re right.” She sighed. “I’m not ready to just…jump into this. I can be a little more flexible, but I need you to also respect whatever limits I need to set.”
“I can do that, so long as you’re settin’ limits because that’s what you need, not what you think you should be doin’.”
A knot in Sharon’s gut loosened, and a rush of exhilarating freedom immediately washed over her. “Fair enough.” It was strange, this turning off of her brain to allow her heart to take over. She wouldn’t-couldn’t-ignore it completely, but she was willing to compromise.
Brenda peered at the clock, the corner of her mouth drooping into a frown. “I should get goin’ so you can eat your lunch.”
“Already?” Sharon asked, surprising herself.
The other woman raised an eyebrow, getting to her feet. “Hey, I’m tryin’ to respect your boundaries.”
“I…appreciate that.” Before Brenda could turn for the door, Sharon said, “Brenda?”
“Yeah?”
“I assume you got yourself something to eat as well?”
Brenda patted her ubiquitous black purse. “Of course. I figured I’d eat when I got back to the office.”
“Why don’t you join me?”
“Really?”
Sharon’s smile was genuine. Without hesitation, she nodded. “Really.”
---