Context? we don't need no stinkin context!
AliCit (11:49:02 PM): eh, i'm failing sex&death anyway
The Kingbird (11:49:26 PM): Oh?
AliCit (11:50:44 PM): yeah, I keep seeing penises where there are none
The Kingbird (11:52:08 PM): Perhaps this is a clue about a deeper problem here, Alison.
AliCit (11:52:40 PM): that the penises are following me?
The Kingbird (11:52:58 PM): Clearly.
AliCit (11:54:07 PM): i should set traps for them
The Kingbird (11:54:25 PM): You should. They work well, I'm told.
AliCit (11:55:13 PM): penis traps?
The Kingbird (11:57:23 PM): Yes.
AliCit (11:58:07 PM): how would I go about making those?
The Kingbird (11:58:23 PM): I dunno. I'm sure you can find blueprints on the Intarweb.
AliCit (11:58:39 PM): but the intarwub is for sending pictures of cats
The Kingbird (11:58:44 PM): True.
The Kingbird (11:58:49 PM): There might be cats in the blueprints.
AliCit (11:58:53 PM): good thinking
The Kingbird (11:59:10 PM): I try.
AliCit (11:59:27 PM): http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=penis+fly+trap&defid=1478037'
The Kingbird (12:01:21 AM): Interesting.
AliCit (12:02:10 AM): ok... google "penis traps blueprint".... the results have broken my brain
The Kingbird (12:02:24 AM): Oh dear.
The Kingbird (12:02:28 AM): Google image or just normal?
AliCit (12:02:36 AM): normal
AliCit (12:02:38 AM): no quotes
AliCit (12:03:14 AM): "And mind is the penis that can penetrate the penetrator"
The Kingbird (12:04:32 AM): Ack.
AliCit (12:04:44 AM): "Performing her own deft puppetry of the penis, "
AliCit (12:04:53 AM): it's just full of wonder
The Kingbird (12:05:16 AM): It is.
AliCit (12:05:21 AM): "Let's just ignore the Crazy Penis name, okay? "
The Kingbird (12:05:32 AM): "a penis penetrating the museum"
AliCit (12:05:32 AM): "This, then, is the meaning of the penis."
AliCit (12:06:09 AM): "No, wait, definitely don't wear a penis costume to a homecoming dance. "
The Kingbird (12:06:36 AM): Wow.
AliCit (12:06:44 AM): " ... The large penis. Hate leper sign. Help greet a sin. Gather in sleep. ...
"
AliCit (12:07:04 AM): ooh
AliCit (12:07:08 AM): that one's anagrams
AliCit (12:07:12 AM): hehe, i so smart
The Kingbird (12:07:37 AM): So smart.
The Kingbird (12:07:47 AM): "a friendly looking 'penis' named Testaclese"
AliCit (12:07:48 AM): Still, messed up
AliCit (12:07:52 AM): lmao!
AliCit (12:07:55 AM): "My feminists abhorred the penis, which, with its rape accusations, symbolises the stick"
AliCit (12:08:16 AM): "So we're on Mars and we have a dancing space penis.
"
The Kingbird (12:08:43 AM): Neils: "So should I be warning Derek????"
AliCit (12:09:36 AM): no, but he should be googling penis traps
AliCit (12:09:38 AM): "... like the club raised for the fatal blow, Cain's is only upright penis in the room. ..."
The Kingbird (12:09:57 AM): "Cain is my dog's name"
AliCit (12:10:00 AM): i know
AliCit (12:10:05 AM): that's what makes it even funnier
The Kingbird (12:10:21 AM): This is better than Anne Rice and William Shater
The Kingbird (12:10:24 AM): Shatner*
The Kingbird (12:10:38 AM): Or so Neils thinks.
AliCit (12:10:54 AM): it is!
The Kingbird (12:10:58 AM): Anihoo, I think I'll sign off now.
The Kingbird (12:11:05 AM): YOu should make an LJ post with some of these.
AliCit (12:11:10 AM): "written by Philip K. Cock Penis D™ Dick. "
AliCit (12:11:25 AM): yea, I'm lazy so i'll just post the last part of the convo
Some other gems that come from googling those three words are:
"Do you remember trying to pull off my penis mould? "
"the Jewish nipple, Jewish breasts, the Jewish penis and Jewish semen."
"She gathered all of Nimrod's pieces, except for his penis, which she couldn't ... "
"... The rim of the penis indicates the physical state of the brains, ..."
"escaping giant rolling boulder traps to discover penis fossils flood my mind. "
"Vagina surgical altered into a penis health care for christians not lara croft "
and the best, the product of the google "..." between search words:
"Really, I'd like to be a motorcycle cop to compensate for my small penis. ... Said a spokesman for Mothers Against Speed Trap Cops, "