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Ranting about everything ... Noel
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Don't believe the lies
November 21, 2006
NOEL GALLAGHER has seen RED over the current mania for all things GREEN.
The OASIS legend has given a landmark interview in which he passes judgement on modern Britain, politics, music and the celebrity culture which he despises.
Noel gave off enough of his own hot air to bring down the ozone layer in one interview session.
What makes Mancunian Noel most angry is the fad for Green politics and do-gooders trying to save the planet.
Guitarist Gallagher, 39, fumed: “Greens are f***ing hippies with no place in the world.
“They’ve been telling us for the last 50 years not to use aerosols or the sky’s going to fall in.
“Well - you’re the scientists, do something about it.
“How do you suggest we get 50million Chinese not to have a fridge?
“Or get 700million Americans to stop using their big stupid cars.
“The only way its going to happen is if the sky falls in.
“Until is does, these Greens are wasting their time.
“I’m glad - because in 50 years time I’ll be dead.”
Finding a rock star with such strong opinions is a rare thing these days.
But Noel more than makes up for the rest of them during this exclusive interview to promote Oasis new Greatest Hits album Stop The Clocks.
ON PARENTHOOD
By the time I’m on my death bed my daughter Anais will be some mental, axe-wielding, cyber-punk lunatic. And I’ll be horrified.
His Green opinions - like all of his thoughts - are more than just hot air.
He tries to get a rise with a controversial statement - but then backs it up.
Noel is convinced that even if the world does change for the worse, kids of tomorrow will simply adapt.
He explained: “They won't be sitting there going: ‘Dad, you shouldn't have brought me into this world.’
“Kids adapt.
“Our parents are horrified about the society we built for ourselves - drugs and sex and drink and rock'n'roll and television.
“But to us that's normal.
“So - we'll be horrified with what follows.
“By the time I'm on my deathbed my daughter ANAIS will be some mental axe-wielding cyber punk lunatic. And I'll be horrified.
Musical legends ... the boys from Manchester, Oasis
Picture: REUTERS
“I'll be glad to get out of the place! She'll have adapted quite well, I would have thought.
“The world in which we live - they always say: we have to leave a safer planet for our children.
“Well - I haven't got a car. So I'm doing my bit for the environment.
Girlfriend ... Sara McDonald
“I walk everywhere. I only live round the corner from Central London and I walk everywhere.
“That's my bit. I take public transport and I walk. So I don't clog up the roads with petrol fumes and all that stuff. That's what I'm doing.”
And Noel has utter contempt for celebrities who lock themselves away from the rest of us and refuse to ever get on the bus or just walk.
He maintains that he still goes to buy his own groceries - and people like ROBBIE WILLIAMS and ELTON JOHN who don’t, come in for a tongue lashing.
Noel said: “If I run out of milk, I go to the supermarket. And I queue up like everybody else.
“Can you imagine Elton John queuing up to by milk?
“The thing is - these stars like Robbie Williams and Elton John and all the rest of that lot - what are they afraid of?
“Are they actually afraid somebody might actually say hello to them in the street?
“There ain’t no axe-wielding celebrity murderers out there. It's not like that.
“It p*sses me off that they lock themselves off from humanity.
“And then you see these people on telly and you wonder why they're a**eholes.
“Cause they're surrounded by a**eholes who treat them like they're something special when they're not.
Strained relationship ... brother Liam
“Whereas the likes of me, when I want a taxi I queue up.”
But it does not mean that Noel will always pause to speak to people.
In fact he loathes signing autographs.
He added: “I don't give a f** about autographs. Just say no!
“I take great pleasure in that sometimes.
“People think they're slaves to their fans. No. People stop you in the street, sign this - no piss off!
“"Could you sign this, please?" No. "Why not?" Cause I'm not in the fu**ing mood, that's why. Dead simple.”
Noel - who has been described as “the wisest man in rock” is on great form.
He is celebrating a complete rebirth of Oasis since their last studio album Don’t Believe The Truth.
New bands like ARCTIC MONKEYS and KASABIAN honour him as the godfather of modern music.
It is now taken as a given that Oasis are the most influential British band of the last 20 years - probably since The Clash or Sex Pistols.
And Noel is relishing his new-found status of the elder statesman during the 11th anniversary of his own band.
The former hellraiser has calmed down on all fronts - and relaxed into a life of quiet enjoyment.
He is blissfully happy with his girlfriend SARA MACDONALD - and refuses to do anything he doesn’t enjoy.
That includes making music when it
ON DIVA STARS
I go to the supermarket and I queue up like everybody else. Can you imagine Elton John queuing up to buy milk?
doesn’t take his fancy.
He explained: “In the early days if I wasn't writing songs I was in the studio recording songs. If I wasn't in the studio I was rehearsing. I was aggressively being creative. Cause I had goals to achieve. You won't get to be the biggest band in the world sitting on your arse watching telly all day.
“Soon as we were the biggest band in the world in 1996/7 I took the foot off the gas.
“You can keep re-inventing yourself, like U2 But then - look at the clothes they wear. It's not very graceful. So - I don't get up every day and go, right, pass me the guitar.
“I really do enjoy being lazy.
“Let me see what I've done this summer. I went to Ibiza for 6 weeks. I went to Miami for 2 weeks. World Cup. Moved house. Went to Republic of Ireland to visit my mother. Been to New York. I just get around. I enjoy doing nothing.”
When Oasis blew up in 1996 at the centre of Britpop they were linked in with the rise of the Labour government.
Noel was famously photographed attending a function at No10 Downing Street and shaking Tony Blair’s hand. It is an image he does NOT regret.
Noel recalled: “I don't feel any shame about that. The picture's a bit sh*t, cause I have a glass of champagne in my hand. And I was wearing a cheap suit, and that's not f**king like me. But I have no regrets about going.
"I was only in my twenties at the time, and I thought - "wants to meet ME? Well, f**ing bring it ON!" And I can't remember the mindset I was in. But looking back now I think I probably would have just been fascinated by it all.”
Noel is no fan of Blair - but he has an interesting take on the Iraq War.
Soldiers come in for a bashing from him - for complaining about having to fight.
He continued: “Blair made an almighty cock-up about going to war in Iraq.
“But when people go on about that it's like they're suggesting that if anybody else had been in power they wouldn't have gone in with the Americans.
“Because after WW2 we always have sided with the Americans.
“Don't think for one moment David Cameron wouldn't have sent the troops in, or the other guy from the Liberals.
“And another thing annoys me.
ON IRAQ
Blair made a cock-up but don’t think for one moment David Cameron - or the other guy from the Liberals - wouldn’t have sent the troops in.
“You get a million people walking through Hyde Park, "don't send the troops", and all that.
“The troops they wanna go, all they want to do is fight! They're soldiers! They're lunatics! They're loving it until they get shot - and then they're claiming compensation.
“If you're bothered about getting shot - here's a thing - don't join the Army!”
Despite calming down on the work front - and enjoying life more - one thing has not changed.
The relationship between Noel and his singing brother LIAM remains as strained as ever.
Noel continued: “The problem with our relationship is that he doesn't like me.
ON THE FIGHTING
The troops, they wanna go, all they want to do is fight! They’re soldiers. They’re loving it, until they get shot - then they’re claiming compensation.
“I know that. I can accept that. I actually don't mind that.
“And I'm indifferent to him. I'm not bothered what he does, I'm not bothered what he says, I'm not bothered about his music, his haircut or where he lives.
“I don't actively go out of my way to antagonise him. He does actively go out of his way to antagonise me.
“But I just keep out of his way. I can't be dealing with him, he's just a pain in the a**.
“He's got a split personality. He's either got a Messiah complex. When he looks in the mirror he sees the Messiah.
“Or he's got a Caesar complex. When he looks in the mirror he sees enemies everywhere.
ON BROTHER LIAM
It’s very difficult to deal with a person who thinks he’s the centre of the universe one minute and the next minute everybody’s out to get him.
“It's very difficult to deal with a person who thinks he's the centre of the universe one minute and the next minute everybody's out to get him.”
Luckily, despite their differences Oasis are around for the long-term.
Noel has compiled the greatest hits to satisfy a contract with Sony Records.
But then the band will go it alone - and start a new album which they plan to release themselves on their label Big Brother.
Noel explained: “Record labels are places you go and borrow money to make records. We don't need to borrow money any more. That's basically it.
“Why take all that money off them, put it in your bank - and then when your record comes out, for every record sold you get 15 Pence. Why not just not take the money and when it comes out, and it sells for £ 15, you get £15 of it. That makes business sense to me.”
Noel hinted that a new studio album will be ready next year.
But for now there’s the compilation to look forward to.
Stop The Clock features 18 of Oasis’ best tunes - and will be released in the UK on November 20.
http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,4-2006540086,00.html