Comments | ukulele_player: Struggling on

ukulele_player

Struggling on

Feb 02, 2016 10:11

I guess it is all going to take time. And this isn't going to be the easiest week with a funeral today and seeing the Alzheimers nurse with my brother tomorrow. I will also be trying a bereavement group tomorrow and seeing the woman from Macmillan on Thursday so maybe that will help. It seems I am only really ok when something is exciting or ( Read more... )

Comments 10

mplsindygirl February 2 2016, 21:44:16 UTC

Gentle suggestion to set the 'should' aside. Yes, you are naming positive things that are going on in your life, but they don't determine your emotions.
I'm glad you're finding things to do gradually. It sounds like a difficult week for anyone, and more so for someone who , like you, is already deep in the grief process.
And you are, indeed, struggling on. *hugs*

ukulele_player February 6 2016, 09:43:25 UTC

Thank you, I guess I did set my expectations high there and forgot that it would indeed be a difficult week even in more normal circumstances.

froganon February 4 2016, 04:32:57 UTC

We all grieve in our own ways and time.

Positivity can become almost delusional if allowed to become out of balance.

A tough week for sure. I am here silently rooting for you.

ukulele_player February 6 2016, 09:53:43 UTC

I guess I have expected too much of myself and at the same time probably got a bit lax about making sure I have enough good things going on when I have empty time. Not that there was much this week. Well that is another week down, and plenty happening this weekend.

froganon March 26 2016, 23:24:04 UTC

I miss you.

ukulele_player March 27 2016, 20:45:01 UTC

One of the things I always appreciate is being missed as for much of my early life people just didn't notice me and so they didn't notice I wasn't around.
I have been busy trying to rebuild my life and have some work but I have started to go down hill a bit recently which could easily be down to it being Easter and the first time - well I was going to say first time in a while but I think actually the first time at all I have hit a proper time where I am reminded of how things were last year as he started to feel unwell from treatment.

froganon March 28 2016, 01:48:51 UTC

Take your time with your grief and memories. Don't let anyone tell you that you are "doing it wrong" or too long or anything.

It's a strange world out there and we have to do the best we can.

ukulele_player March 29 2016, 09:26:50 UTC

I had made up my mind that for at least the first year or two it would be just counting down the days. And for me, keeping busy and with people as I tend to need that even when things are good. At the moment I think I am realising that it is unlikely now I will ever lose this sense of loneliness. It was there before I knew Andy, it more or less disappeared in the later years, but now it is back ( ... )

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