Evangelical Christian to English Dictionary

[umczar]

Evangelical Speak to English

Fellowship: A party or any event that provides socialization.

Spiritual Gifts(Charismatic denomination): Mutant Jesus Super Powers

Spiritual Gifts(Main line denomination): Talents

Service: Short for "Worship Service"

Worship Service(Main Line denomination): Long meeting where one stands up, sits down

Comments

[snow_lynx]

"SAVED" - Running up to the altar at age 7 because all your friends did it and you want to, too, and falling down on the altar. This action absolves you from all past and future crimes.

"SATAN" - That which motivates the lives of everyone you don't like.

"REVIVAL" - A "Fellowship" which includes a barbeque, tents, and yelling at people for not being passionate enough.

"PASSION" - has nothing to do with sex and everything to do with agony and death.

"GIVE IT UP TO GOD" - Get over it.

[umczar]

Communion: commemorative Jesus snack, If you have not joined their Jesus club it is best to not partake. As one person said, "You mean they turned Jesus into a cracker?"

Saved: (what she said)... and/or joining the Jesus club. Means you no longer have to follow the old rules but the other club members will not treat you as saved unless you do follow the old rules.

[hippybear]

Hey! Nice to see you're still kicking around. Last everyone here at LJ heard, you were in the hospital.

*hugs*

[umczar]

I'm out of the hospital, but not out of the woods. Had a very good heart week and was able to do a lot more than normal.

Thank's for noticing that I'm back.