Colleges and tigers and bears, OH MY!

[undeadgoat]

As some of you may (or may not) know, the entire University of California system's application deadline is this Friday. Um. So I am finalizing my essays this weekend. I had some friends look over them on Wednesday, and have edited them substantially myself, and, well, I know I haven't been around on livejournal much, but that doesn't mean I don't

Comments

[lowfatsourcreme]

Am I the elementary school friend? Because then I would feel honored to be mentioned. But you've tightened the ending nicely since I read it last. I have some picky comments though (which are always the best):

-You have two ellipsed lists in a row, which is a little odd.
-I think there is an errant comma in the second to last paragraph
-I think there is a place you need a semicolon instead of a comma in the last one (SP1, maybe?)

But otherwise it's good. Good luck! (And congratulations on being finished with another application.)

[undeadgoat]

. . . Yes, that's you. One guess who the other three friends are. :P