[YGO fic] The One the World Forgot
※ Pairing - Angstshipping
※ Warnings - angst
※ Disclaimer - I obviously don't own it.
A long time ago writing a horrible songfic to Concrete Angel was almost as popular as Bakura beating Ryou...
ღ - ღ - ღ
She walks to school with the lunch she packed
Nobody knows what she's holdin' back
“And then Kaiba’s like, ‘Damn it mutt!’ and Joey got so mad his entire face turned red!” Tristan laughed along with the rest of his friends, with the exception of Joey Wheeler of course because to him, that wasn’t funny.
“Tristan, I thought I told you not to tell our friends.” Joey muttered into his pudding. It was lunchtime at school and the cafeteria was filled with noisy kids eating lunch and talking quite loudly.
Tristan stopped and seemed to think about it, “Oops, I thought you said to tell them.” He grinned cheekily, causing the others to laugh some more and Joey to glare.
“Oh, come on Joey.” Yugi smiled at his friend; “Don’t you remember the time Marik appeared from the Millennium Rod when Malik was standing beside Seto’s swimming pool?”
Joey grinned and turned to look at his boyfriend, “You mean the time he didn’t appear over solid ground, only water? Oh yeah, I still got the picture framed and hung in my room.” He laughed along with the others at the precious memory, well, everyone but Marik laughed. He was too busy scowling.
“I don’t remember that, when did that happen?” Ryou wondered as he looked at Joey.
Joey blinked as he thought back of the many times they’d been at Seto’s pool. “Nah man, you weren’t there. You were like sick or something.” Joey shrugged as Ryou nodded as he went back to his juice box.
“Hey,” Tristan grinned, “Remember the time we switched Kaiba’s normal hair gel with that dye?”
“Was that the time he came to school with neon green glow in the dark hair?” Ryou muttered out loud and everyone tried to stifle their laughter as they nodded. “I had wondered what had happened.” He shrugged.
“So says the kid who dyed the tips of his white hair black, that of course, includes the bangs.” Malik teased lightly, only to have Ryou stick out his tongue at him. “Don’t stick it out unless you’re planning to use it.”
“Maybe I was.” Ryou countered only to hear Bakura snort.
“Ryou, out of all your weird friends, why did you have to turn out to be the weird Goth type? Really, I would have figured it’d be Yami with all the black leather he wears.” The fiend motioned over to the pharaoh who sat down on the other side of the table.
Yami, having been listening, glared at the tomb robber, “Implying something thief?” He asked acidly.
“Oh nothing. You just wear a lot of leather Yami…not that we mind of course.” Bakura grinned wickedly and Yami only smirked. Everyone knew there was something between them.
Everyone was too busy to notice the slight scowl that crossed over the ‘weird Goth’s’ face.
Wearin' the same dress she wore yesterday
She hides the bruises with linen and lace
Ryou stormed to his next class as soon as the bell had rung. Nobody had noticed his mood however, which wasn’t new. “Weird Goth my ass.” He muttered to himself before he entered the still empty classrooms. There was still ten minutes at least before the other students would start to head back to class, Ryou just had to get away.
It was their last year in high school and he was just finding out the kind of person he was. But he wasn’t the only one who had changed.
Yugi had gotten a little taller, though he’d always be considered short, and had joined the wrestling team last year. Everyone had gone to cheer him on his first match and every match after that and so far, he was undefeated.
Joey had decided on going to university and studying law so he could become a lawyer. He wanted to work with abused kids and give the ones nobody ever listened to justice. He wanted to make a name for himself…and the money was always a nice added bonus as well.
Marik, Bakura and Yami had all decided to become ‘mortals’. They went to school and were like every other kid their ‘age’. They’re records stated that they were all 19 and had each failed a grade, not the same grade of course, but they’d failed one grade, a reason why they were all in the twelfth grade now, instead of already graduated.
Marik, who had been encouraged by Joey and Malik, had decided on going to university to study math. The guy was a whiz when it came to numbers, and as soon as everyone had realized this, they had started going to Marik for help, instead of going to Ryou. Ryou didn’t mind of course since it gave him time to finish his schoolwork and have extra time to himself.
Bakura was going to move on to study archeology. He’d wanted to learn about it ever since he and Ryou’s father had met. Ryou’s father had fully supported the idea of Bakura going onto university and he loved the idea of at least one of his ‘sons’ following in his footsteps and taking an interest in history. Ryou was pretty sure that his father had a new favourite son, but again, he didn’t mind. He knew about Bakura’s past, even if Bakura didn’t and he wanted Bakura to have a second chance at life, a good life this time.
Yami wasn’t totally set on what he wanted to do, but he knew it had something to do with computers. The pharaoh had taken a job at KaibaCorp and even though he and his boss fought like cats and dogs Seto wouldn’t know what to do without his added help with new game ideas and enhancements.
Tristan, who had always wanted to become a cop like his father, had been studying hard to get into the best police academy. The problem was that it was in America and he’d have to go next year if his grade was high enough.
Tea, as always, was practicing hard to become the best dancer she could be, and Ryou had to admit, she was very good. They’d all gone to every one of her performances and she was sure to become a star. She’d already been accepted into Juilliard in the US.
Of course there was Malik, who was planning to go to university to get a teaching degree. (Even though his dream was to become a professional track racer, but neither Isis nor Marik were too thrilled with that idea.)
And last was Ryou. He wasn’t going to be going to university, which didn’t please his father at all, but there was nothing the man could do about it. Every time his father asked what he was going to do with his life, Ryou just told him that he didn’t know. One time he’d told his father exactly what he wanted to do, what his dream was, and as soon as his father had realized that his son was serious he’d shot the dream filled with holes and had outright stated that he would not support Ryou.
That’s what Ryou minded. Though there was really nothing he could do about it now. It wasn’t a coincidence that at the same time Ryou had told him, it was the same time his father started to pay more attention to Bakura. Ryou would just always shrug the stinging pain away; after all, he was used to being ignored.
“Good afternoon Ryou.” The teacher, Mrs. Mitsu, greeted the boy as he sat down at his desk in the back row.
“Afternoon Mrs. Mitsu.” Ryou greeted politely as he slid into the desk. With that, he opened his binder and pulled out a notebook that Aneko Mitsu had seen plenty of times. It was a normal notebook that had a black cover. On the cover had been drawn several images and several quotes had been written with a whiteout pen. None of the images were what any mentally healthy teenager should be drawing and the quotes were sometimes even scary.
Mrs. Mitsu, who had been a teacher Ryou had had ever year since coming to high school, had noticed the change in one of her favourite students. He had isolated himself for some reason and had started to dress…well, different. It was little changes of course, instead of light colours; he’d started to wear a lot of black. Then he’d gotten his ears pierced and then it was his nose. Next he’d started to wear long sleeved shirts, no matter what the weather and then of course, he’d dyed his hair.
There had been no reason to worry though, since Ryou’s grades had not changed and he still seemed pretty happy. Although he seemed happy, Aneko had gone to the counselor and the man had said that Ryou was merely finding a way to express himself. It wasn’t until the boy’d slipped up one day and one of his sleeves had gotten pushed up. It had been during a test and Mrs. Mitsu had seen dark bruises and what appeared to be scratches along the pale skin.
She hadn’t said anything about it to Ryou or to anyone else, but she knew that she had to ask someone, and she knew just who to ask.
The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask
It's hard to see the pain behind the mask
Bakura entered the classroom. When he found no one else there he looked at the teacher and spoke, “I swear I didn’t do it.”
Mrs. Mitsu looked up and blinked in surprised, then began to laugh. “That’s not why I called you here Bakura.” She promised. “Now, please close the door and have a seat. I just want to talk to you.” She smiled warmly.
Truth be told Bakura liked this teacher. He didn’t have her for any of his classes, but he’d seen her around the school and she’d always been nice to him when other teachers wouldn’t. So Bakura closed the door and sat down in the front row, so she wouldn’t have to yell at him if he sat in the back.
Mrs. Mitsu got up from her chair and moved to the front of her desk so they were a little closer. She didn’t want anyone to overhear what they were going to speak about. “Bakura, I have a few questions concerning your brother.”
“Ryou?” Bakura was confused, “What’d he do?”
“He didn’t do anything. I’m just wondering…what’s your home life like?” She wondered. “I mean, nobody has a perfect family and if someone were to say that they did I’d think that there was a problem.”
Bakura shrugged, “It’s usually just Ryou and I there. Dad’s away a lot on his digs and Mom died a long time ago.” He explained.
Mrs. Mitsu sighed. She knew that it wasn’t Bakura that was hurting his brother, she’d seen him around the younger boy and he’d always been very protective and helpful. When Ryou would let him of course.
“Is there something wrong with Ryou?” Bakura’s voice brought her from her musings.
Sighing sadly to herself she sat down in a desk so she was level with the student. “Bakura, I’ve noticed some bruises on Ryou’s arms, along with cuts of some kind. I know that you haven’t done anything, but I also know that Ryou doesn’t have a problem with bullies anymore. And since there is no parent at home, that only leaves one other person who could be hurting him.” She saw Bakura pale slightly.
“Himself.” Bakura swallowed. The thought of Ryou hurting himself, hurt Bakura. As if the kid hadn’t gone through enough pain already, he had to hurt himself?
“I probably shouldn’t have said anything, but I just wanted you to be aware.” Mrs. Mitsu continued but Bakura cut her off.
“No, no…thank you. I…should have noticed myself and much sooner, but…he doesn’t talk to me like he used to.” He sighed. “I’d better get to my next class.” He muttered and got up and left the room.
Bearing the burden of a secret storm
Sometimes she wishes she was never born
“I found it.” Malik announced as he climbed out from under Ryou’s bed. He sat down on the mattress and began to flip through the book within his hands. Bakura joined him and they both read the neatly written print before them.
‘[December 21st]
I now realize what Yugi was going through when he was somewhat living in Yami’s shadow. How could he compete with a mighty pharaoh who practically has control of the Shadow Realm? He couldn’t, so he just stopped trying. Everyone noticed Yugi again because he found interest in different things than Yami.
I found myself in the same position a few months after Battle City. It was kind of weird because I didn’t think anyone would ever trust Bakura. That sounded bad. I have always trusted Bakura, even in the beginning when things were…rough. But even I admit that he did some pretty horrible things and it totally surprised me when he was welcomed within our group. Of course, with Bakura being welcomed, I guess it meant someone had to be pushed out.
That someone was me.
Now, you’d think the solution would be easy, right? Just do what Yugi did and find a few things that I like that Bakura doesn’t. Well, that’s the problem. Bakura’s never liked what I like. I must have tried everything to be noticed again, but nothing ever worked. I’m not usually one who likes attention anyway, but I did like having friends.
Bakura’s always being invited places without me and I guess I don’t mind so much, I mean, as long as he’s happy right? Technically he is a part of me, so at least a part of me is happy too. Yeah, that’s shit and I know it. After Battle City happened and Malik and Marik were accepted within the group, it was great. Malik and I had gotten really close and we’d always talk to each other and do things together, inside and outside the whole group. Now he’s been hanging out with Bakura instead of me. The closest friend I’ve ever had has abandoned me too. I think that it’s mostly my fault though so I can’t blame Malik. Whenever I get a crush on someone I’m close to I usually push them away.
Just last week while we were all sitting together at lunch Joey brought up the idea about a Christmas party for this weekend, considering Friday was the last day of school before the Christmas break. Everyone loved the idea and Yugi volunteered his place, like we’d done the year before. Tea then asked everyone if they could actually make it, knowing that Malik and Marik didn’t celebrate Christmas. She pointedly asked Joey, Tristan, Malik, Marik and Bakura.
You noticed someone’s name missing from that list too, didn’t you?
Um, yeah. Nobody said a thing to me, so I took the hint that I wasn’t invited. Bakura left here an hour ago. At least he said good-bye and hadn’t totally forgotten about me. Tomorrow I’ll probably hear all about the fun they had. Whatever.’
Bakura stopped reading out loud and looked at Malik. Malik looked sadly at Bakura and shook his head; “It’s all true.” Malik whispered as the two of them deciding to read on.
Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she's loved
Concrete Angel
‘December 25th,
Merry Christmas and all that junk. That’s all it is you know. Bull shit actually. Christmas is a stupid holiday to celebrate. It’s only a time for greedy people to get presents and for families to see each other (this would be a good thing about this time of year, if one had a family to see). Forget about the religion crap, there is no god.
I sound kinda bitter, don’t I?
Yeah well, wanna know why? Dad promised he’d come home for Christmas this year, unlike last year and the year before. And guess what! He did! My father actually made it home in time for Christmas! Hold on, that’s not even the best part! He didn’t come home to see me! Oh no, he came home to see, yep, you guessed it! Bakura!
So, last night my father took Bakura out for supper without me. Apparently they had a good time from all the happiness that was radiating from my other half when they got home, around midnight. I had spent my evening watching reruns of some stupid Christmas show about the spirit of Christmas and decorating the damned house because before my wonderful family had left, Dad had muttered something to me that went something like ‘I wonder where I went wrong’ when Bakura was out of earshot. I, however, wasn’t and it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know just who he was talking about.
So, I decorated the house to make him happy. I put up the tree with all the lights and tinsel and garland and everything! There was garland and Santas’ hanging around the doorways and on the walls and there were lights that I’d placed around the window. There were sleigh bells hung on the door and mistletoe placed above the entrance to the kitchen. I’d placed the gifts I’d gotten for Bakura and Dad under the tree.
For supper, I had a sandwich with sandwich meat and mustard and a flat coke.
When they’d finally come home I was hoping for a little credit to all my hard work. I’m not exactly tall and had to do a lot of climbing to get everything in place. My father had looked around while Bakura had gone upstairs and he’d muttered something like ‘Good enough’.
Oh gee Father, I’m so glad that you appreciate all my hard work just to please you! I love you too Daddy!
It’s no wonder I cut myself. One of these days I just might slip up and ‘accidentally’ slice my wrist open.’
“Depressed, isn’t he.” Malik muttered to himself as he flipped the page over.
“But it’s true.” Bakura muttered, ashamed.
‘December 31st,
Well, Dad and I finally had a talk today. May I mention that he’s been here since the twenty third and he’s leaving today, and this was the first conversation we held at all? You mean I didn’t? How forgetful of me.
So Dad and I talked. Well, I talked, he yelled. He wanted to know what I wanted to do next year with my life, probably just wanted to know what the son-that-had-gone-wrong was going to waste money on. I told him that I wasn’t planning on going to school and he wanted to know how I was going to support myself, because he’s ‘not going to be supporting my sorry ass for the rest of my life!’
So I told him.
I told him how I wanted to entertain people with my voice. I admit that I’m not the best, but I’m not bad. I’ve gone to enough auditions to know. I even told him that’d I’d been accepted into a punk band and that I was their lead vocalist. He laughed in my face. My own father laughed in my face. I think his exact words were ‘Oh Ryou, why can’t you be smart like Bakura?’
I wanted to tell him that I’d never be Bakura and that I would never be perfect. I almost had the urge to show him the newest addition to my extensive collection of body art, but then he’d surely look down upon me and it would just be another failure added to the ever-growing list he has for me.
You know how parents aren’t actually supposed to have a favourite child? That’s fucked up. Bakura’s my father’s favourite. Don’t get me wrong, I love Bakura as if he really were my brother, and a lot of the times I wish he were. But my father sees him as perfect and its really starting to piss me off.
Dad found out about Bakura’s…well, he walked in on Bakura and Yami making out anyway and so they talked and he was fine with it. I figured that he’d be fine with me because well hey, like Dark half, like Light half right?
I actually got his attention and he spent about an hour or two talking to me about it. It would have been nice if he hadn’t been yelling at me the entire time about how wrong homosexuality was and how I was going to burn in Hell for my sins.
Hell’s been looking better and better every day. It actually feels like I’m not loved anymore. Hell, I don’t think anyone around here even likes me; they’re probably just putting up with me because I’m ‘Bakura’s other half’. Cast into his shadow again.
But whatever, I guess that all I have now are my childish dreams of future success as an entertainer. Yeah, I admit that they are very childish and really won’t come true. But like everyone says, it’s always nice to dream.’
“Wow.” Malik closed the book, having read all that he wanted to read. Bakura only nodded in agreement. He sighed and shook his head and that’s when he noticed the third figure standing at the door.
He gasped and looked up, right into blazing chocolate eyes.
Somebody cries in the middle of the night
The neighbors hear, but they turn out the lights
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Ryou growled as he stalked over to the bed and ripped the book from Malik’s hands. “What right have you acquired that allows you to come into the only room in the house that is still mine and go through my stuff?” He spat in a yell, glaring at both of his ‘friends’.
“We were worried about you Ryou!” Bakura shouted back, not one to take anything from anyone.
“Worried?” Ryou cocked an eyebrow, “I’m truly touched that I’ve suddenly been noticed, and I hate to make you worry for nothing but I’m no longer looking for your attention, nor do I need it!” He was about to turn away when a strong hand grabbed his wrist, causing the boy to wince and hiss through his teeth at the pain. Whirling around in anger, Ryou came face to face with Malik.
The Egyptian ignored the burning glare Ryou had pinned on him as he pushed Ryou’s sleeve up, revealing grotesque black, blue, and purple skin. The dark bruises were decorated with cuts in the shapes of a language once forgotten.
Bakura glanced at the markings and recognized them as his own language. “The Forgotten One?” He questioned.
Ryou pulled away and replaced his sleeve. “It’s true, isn’t it? Everyone loves you now and somehow, I got pushed into your shadow. I minded at first but I’ve gotten used to it.” He shrugged as he placed his journal in a drawer of his dresser. “It’s just like before we moved here.” His voice was calmer now and that scared Bakura. “I’m used to being alone, remember? It was nice to have friends for a little while but I knew it wouldn’t last.” His voice trailed off, “Besides,” He turned around and faced the two of them, his expression emotionless, his eyes empty. “I have my band and a stupid dream and my other half is happy. What more could I ask for?”
A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate
When morning comes it'll be too late
“Look Ryou, we realized that you were…left out of a lot of things.” Malik began.
“Left out of a lot of things?” Ryou questioned then began to laugh. As he laughed a tear slowly slid down his face. “You don’t even have a clue, do you? None of you do.” He chuckled to himself and gently wiped the tear away, but it was soon replaced with another one. “What did you do on New Years Malik?”
“We were at Seto’s celebrating the New Year.” Malik replied, “And Bakura’s birthday of course.” He shrugged.
Ryou had stopped laughing and was now only smiling sadly to himself, Bakura didn’t even think he was aware of the smile himself. “Yeah, I heard about all the fun you guys had the day we got back to school. When’s your birthday Malik?” He wondered casually.
“September 12th, you know that.”
Ryou nodded, “When’s Marik’s?”
“The same as mine.”
“What do we hikaris share with our other halves?” Ryou crossed his arms.
Malik stopped, realizing what nobody had even thought of before. “Everything.” He whispered, staring down at the carpet.
“Yep.” Ryou continued. “I picked January 1st as Bakura’s birthday for a reason, but I guess it wasn’t important enough for anyone to remember passed the fact that it was Bakura’s birthday.” He stared at the wall, all trace of smile gone; only sadness remained. “It doesn’t actually matter. I mean, you were probably all pretty plastered, at least, by the stories I’ve heard you were. But even so, it would have been really nice to have had someone call me up and wish me a happy birthday too.”
Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she's loved
Concrete Angel
“You pushed us away too you know.” Bakura interjected. “I know that that doesn’t excuse us for letting you.”
Ryou snorted, “I know I did. After I tried all I could to break free of your shadow, I just gave up and started pushing away.” He sighed, “It hurts less when you’re completely abandoned.”
“We’d never abandon you Ryou.” Bakura growled, unable to believe that Ryou could think that.
“Oh?” Ryou looked up; “I wouldn’t be too sure Bakura. What do you thinks going to happen next year?” He asked, “Everyone is going to go off to school. Everyone but me. After graduation I’m moving out and into an apartment with Rei anyway.”
“Rei?” Malik asked.
“He’s in the band.” Ryou explained.
“You really are serious about singing, aren’t you?” Malik realized, he’d never known that about his friend. Ryou had always kept it from him.
“Yeah, I am.” Ryou shrugged, “And, as you’ve probably read, I don’t have support from anyone.”
“You have our support you idiot.” Bakura rolled his eyes.
“He’s right. We’d never make fun of your dreams.” Malik continued, then he smiled, “You’re the only one who took me seriously about becoming a track racer.” His smile turned into a grin.
“You were actually serious?” Bakura made a face.
“See?” Malik glared at Bakura. “Look, Bakura, can I talk to your brother alone?” He asked.
“Fine. But then we’re talking.” Bakura pinned Ryou with his gaze until the younger boy finally nodded. When Bakura was gone and the door was shut, Malik sat back on the bed.
“I’m sorry you know.” He said, breaking the silence that had settled between them.
“It doesn’t matter now.” Ryou shook his head.
“But it does.” Malik insisted, he sighed and motioned for Ryou to sit beside him. Sighing to himself, Ryou moved and sat down on the bed. “Look Ryou, I wish that I could change the things that have happened, but I can’t. I had never had a friend before, at least until you came along. You were everything I imagined a best friend to be. I trusted you and I told you everything, and when you started pushing away from me I got scared. I started to talk to Bakura, hoping he’d know what was up but he didn’t. I guess we got close and losing you wasn’t hurting as much anymore.” Malik sighed and closed his eyes. “I love you okay? I always have and I probably always will. You were and still are my best friend. I miss you.”
Ryou swallowed. “I…I miss you too.” He whispered, but wouldn’t look at Malik.
Malik smiled softly, “You know I’ll always be there for you. Whether it’s to listen to you rant and rave or encourage you to follow your dreams. Either way I’m not going to let you push me away again, so you’re stuck with me now.” He raised an eyebrow as he looked over at Ryou.
Ryou snorted and rolled his eyes, “I suppose I can handle that.” He replied, then grinned.
A statue stands in a shaded place
An angel girl with an upturned face
“Do we have to? We’ve been walking around this damned mall all day!” Bakura complained as he followed the others into a music store. He was only complaining for the hell of it of course, considering he knew how much Yugi wanted the new Lifehouse CD.
“Be quiet tomb robber. Complain, complain, complain. That’s all you ever do!” Yami rolled his eyes as he followed Yugi down one of the CD isles. “I swear, if I didn’t love you so much I’d-” He was interrupted as Bakura grabbed him and kissed him hard.
After pulling away Bakura smirked, “Send me to the Shadow Realm, yeah, yeah, I know.” He moved passed Yami and continued to follow Yugi down the isle.
“New Linkin Park!” Joey grinned as he picked it up and looked at the back.
Marik rolled his eyes at his boyfriend and looked around the store at all the other people. He noticed Malik over in the ‘alternative and punk’ section. Wondering why Malik would ever be in that section since the Egyptian usually just listened to whatever anyone else bought, he wandered over to Malik’s side.
“What’re you lookin’ for?” He wondered as he looked at the names. “Smashmouth? Smashing Pumpkins? Oi.” He shook his head. “Let’s go back to the sane sections.”
Malik chuckled, “You can listen to the Backstreet Boys if you want to Marik, but I’m just looking.” He laughed as Marik glared at him.
“So I happen to find Nick Carter a lot like Joey. Dumb.” Marik replied as he went back over to Joey.
Malik continued to grin as his eyes read over the titles of all the bands. He’d started at the Z’s and had finally gotten down to the F’s. That’s when he saw something that caught his eye. A new band apparently and by the number of copies that had been sold already, the band was pretty popular. He picked up the CD from the ‘Forsaken’ band.
On the CD cover was a stone statue with an angel sitting at the top. The angel seemed to be smiling at the world around her, even though the entire statue was shrouded in a shadow. He looked at the title for the album. “The One the World Forgot?” Malik questioned, then grinned as he turned around, “Bakura! I found it!” He laughed excitedly.
“Really?” Bakura quickly raced over to him, followed by their confused friends.
“Found what? Malik, you don’t listen to punk.” Yugi was confused.
“Who’s that?” Tea wondered as she and Tristan stood by Joey.
“These guys, I do listen to.” Malik grinned and handed the CD over to Bakura.
Bakura quickly flipped the back and on it everyone found a picture of the band. The one in front, and shortest amongst the others was a boy with amazing white hair. The tips had been died black, this included the bangs.
“That’s…” Joey’s eyes went wide. “Ryou?”
Bakura read through the tracks on the album. “The Forgotten One, My Other Half, Dreams Are Like Stars (Sometimes They Crash and Burn), The One the World Forgot, Cut, A Christmas to Forget, Doesn’t Daddy Love Me?, An Unhappy Birthday, To Break Free (Of Your Shadow) and To the One that Holds My Heart.”
“I still say he’s depressed.” Malik shrugged as he took the album from Bakura and went to pay for it.
Since they were done shopping, everyone decided that they’d relax over at the game shop. Not before picking up ice cream from the local store of course. Once everyone was relaxed and the ice cream was all gone, Yugi finally spoke up. “Why don’t we listen to that album you bought Malik?” He suggested and Malik handed him the CD. Yugi placed it within the player and pressed play as he looked inside the CD cover.
Sprawled on the floor, Yugi read through it with a few of the others reading over his shoulder.
“Wow, Ryou wrote all of these songs himself.” Tristan said as they read through the lyrics.
Marik winced, “Pretty disturbing if you ask me.”
Joey rolled his eyes, “Well one, we didn’t ask you. And two, you’re already disturbed.” He stuck out his tongue, only to have Marik pounce on him.
“You know…” Yami began, “This last song? ‘To the One that Holds My Heart’? It sounds awfully familiar.”
Yugi read through the lyrics, “You’re right Yami.” He said, but he knew exactly who the song was dedicated to. It wasn’t hard when you read the dedication in the Thank Yous from the band. “Hmm…‘To the One that Holds My Heart, thanks for everything you’ve ever done for me. You supported me when I didn’t even realize it and I’ll never mind being stuck with you.’ Sounds kinda sweet to me.” He grinned, his eyes straying to Malik for only a split second before turning the page again.
“Who’s he? He’s kinda hot.” Joey exclaimed as they found another member of the band.
“His name’s Rei.” Yugi said, reading through the small bio.
“Did you just call him hot?” Marik growled as he glared at Joey. “Joseph Wheeler!” He pounced again and thus began another wrestling match. Joey could only laugh.
A name is written on a polished rock
A broken heart that the world forgot
Sighing to himself as he dug for his keys, twenty-year-old Ryou yawned. He’d been on a non-stop tour since March of last year and it was finally December and the entire crew got Christmas off. The small apartment that he and Rei shared would be empty for the next two weeks as Rei had family to visit, so Ryou got the entire place to himself.
Looking forward to a hot bath and a soft bed, Ryou unlocked the door and stepped inside. Before he could reach for the light switch however, the lights came on and ‘Surprise’ was yelled in his face.
“Huh?” Ryou was more than a little confused as he glanced at all the smiling faces in front of him. “What are you guys doing here?” He wondered, glancing at Bakura and Malik for an explanation.
“It’s Christmas you idiot, why else would we be here?” Marik replied. “You’ve got two weeks, we’ve got two weeks!”
Bakura cackled as he pulled Ryou into the living room where everyone was gathered. There was music and alcohol and the entire apartment had been decorated for the season. Ryou sat back in an armchair and watched everyone with a smile. As he was watching, someone sat down behind him in the chair, pushing him forward. Unable to see who it was, Ryou was startled as a small gift was handed to him from the hands behind him. Taking the small present he unwrapped it and smiled when he opened the box.
Inside the box was a golden band. It was plain and he picked it up from out of the box, looking at the engraving on the inside. He grinned to himself as he read over the words. ‘From the One that Holds Your Heart’. He pulled the promise ring, for that’s what it was, onto his middle finger and found it to be a perfect fit. With that he settled himself against the warm body behind his and relaxed as strong arms wrapped around him.
They were a perfect fit.
Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she's loved
Concrete Angel
Author’s Notes:
So you know what exactly is happening:
She walks to school with the lunch she packed / Nobody knows what she's holdin' back
Ryou has obviously been left out of a few things and though they aren’t that important they seem to have an impact. He’s hurt but he doesn’t say anything to anyone and obviously hasn’t said anything before either.
Wearin' the same dress she wore yesterday / She hides the bruises with linen and lace
Like in the other ‘Concrete Angel’ fics out there, the reader finds out that Ryou has bruises and cuts, as if he’s being abused on his arms, and probably other places of his body. This sets up for the wonderful idea of ‘Oh! Bakura’s beating Ryou again!’
The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask / It's hard to see the pain behind the mask
In most fics the teacher just ignored what’s going on with Ryou because as the lyrics state ‘The teacher wonders but she doesn’t ask’. Mrs. Mitsu didn’t ask Ryou, but she did however speak to Bakura, because no matter how dumb a teacher is, when a student is in trouble they notice and they never just stand by and watch. *grumbles about the stupid teachers that were at her own high school*
Normally, Bakura would be the one to have caused the wounds on Ryou, but I don’t like an abusive Bakura so here, he obviously isn’t the one inflicting such horrible pain for Ryou. I did give in however and gave hints about their past together, but what really happened is totally up to the reader.
Bearing the burden of a secret storm / Sometimes she wishes she was never born
Yeah, I know, the ‘reading of the journal’ is a little over done, but I didn’t care at the time and needed a way to get Bakura and Malik to know about the pain Ryou was going through. ‘Bearing the burden of a secret storm’ represented Ryou’s feelings and how he kept them to himself.
Through the wind and the rain / She stands hard as a stone / In a world that she can't rise above / But her dreams give her wings / And she flies to a place where she's loved / Concrete Angel
I know it wasn’t mentioned until here, about Ryou’s dreams but the reader wasn’t supposed to know about it until it was revealed. Stupid concept of a dream I realize too, but I liked the idea. It’s a dream many of us have. ‘She stands hard as stone’ in away means that Ryou’s serious about the dream and ‘In a world that she can’t rise above’ means that he knows it’s still a childish dream even if he’s so serious about it.
Somebody cries in the middle of the night / The neighbors hear, but they turn out the lights
Usually this would be the part where the reader would read about how Bakura beat Ryou within the inch of his life and how all the neighbors ignored his cries for help or just his cries. Instead of that, Ryou walks in on the two reading his private thoughts and as many of us would, got upset. He yelled. They yelled. Everyone yelled. And I’m pretty sure someone heard them.
A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate / When morning comes it'll be too late
Ryou pulled away and replaced his sleeve. “It’s true, isn’t it? Everyone loves you now and somehow, I got pushed into your shadow. I minded at first but I’ve gotten used to it.” He shrugged as he placed his journal in a drawer of his dresser. “It’s just like before we moved here.” His voice was calmer now and that scared Bakura. “I’m used to being alone, remember? It was nice to have friends for a little while but I knew it wouldn’t last.” His voice trailed off, “Besides,” He turned around and faced the two of them, his expression emotionless, his eyes empty. “I have my band and a stupid dream and my other half is happy. What more could I ask for?”
He’s obviously got a lot of issues and is somewhat ‘fragile’ emotionally since he feels he hasn’t any support from those who were once close to him. ‘When morning comes it’ll be too late’ does not represent Ryou committing suicide, instead it means that he might have pushed himself so far away from them that they’d never get him back.
Through the wind and the rain / She stands hard as a stone / In a world that she can't rise above / But her dreams give her wings / And she flies to a place where she's loved / Concrete Angel
Most of the time the chorus is just stupid and annoying to work with, it was the same here. Malik (who yes, is the love interest) doesn’t want Ryou to push himself away so tells him that he’s still there for him and that he hasn’t forgotten about him and of course tells him to basically follow his dreams.
A statue stands in a shaded place / An angel girl with an upturned face
It took me a few minutes to actually come up with an idea other than the obvious. Ryou’s dead and his gravestone has an angel on it. But after some muse abuse *smiles at ChibiQuatre Muse* we came up with an idea that I hope can be considered a good one.
Instead of a gravestone, the statue was actually that, a statue. A picture on a CD cover that represented ‘The One the World Forgot’.
A name is written on a polished rock / A broken heart that the world forgot
Again, because there was no death, this had to have a different meaning. Instead of a name carved in stone marking the end of a life, there’s an idea carved in gold marking the beginning of a new life. It’s obvious that it’s Malik behind him at the end and the ring is not supposed to be a sign of marriage or engagement, it’s a friendship/promise ring of the future. Perhaps later on marriage or engagement.
Through the wind and the rain / She stands hard as a stone / In a world that she can't rise above / But her dreams give her wings / And she flies to a place where she's loved / Concrete Angel
About other stuff:
The tracks on Ryou’s album have all come out of the story from somewhere. Also, please don’t take them because they are real songs written by myself that I had decided to use.
And if you’re wondering about ‘Rei’, he wasn’t meant to be from Beyblade, or any other anime, but if you are happy thinking he is then so be it.
» table of contents «
※ Warnings - angst
※ Disclaimer - I obviously don't own it.
A long time ago writing a horrible songfic to Concrete Angel was almost as popular as Bakura beating Ryou...
ღ - ღ - ღ
She walks to school with the lunch she packed
Nobody knows what she's holdin' back
“And then Kaiba’s like, ‘Damn it mutt!’ and Joey got so mad his entire face turned red!” Tristan laughed along with the rest of his friends, with the exception of Joey Wheeler of course because to him, that wasn’t funny.
“Tristan, I thought I told you not to tell our friends.” Joey muttered into his pudding. It was lunchtime at school and the cafeteria was filled with noisy kids eating lunch and talking quite loudly.
Tristan stopped and seemed to think about it, “Oops, I thought you said to tell them.” He grinned cheekily, causing the others to laugh some more and Joey to glare.
“Oh, come on Joey.” Yugi smiled at his friend; “Don’t you remember the time Marik appeared from the Millennium Rod when Malik was standing beside Seto’s swimming pool?”
Joey grinned and turned to look at his boyfriend, “You mean the time he didn’t appear over solid ground, only water? Oh yeah, I still got the picture framed and hung in my room.” He laughed along with the others at the precious memory, well, everyone but Marik laughed. He was too busy scowling.
“I don’t remember that, when did that happen?” Ryou wondered as he looked at Joey.
Joey blinked as he thought back of the many times they’d been at Seto’s pool. “Nah man, you weren’t there. You were like sick or something.” Joey shrugged as Ryou nodded as he went back to his juice box.
“Hey,” Tristan grinned, “Remember the time we switched Kaiba’s normal hair gel with that dye?”
“Was that the time he came to school with neon green glow in the dark hair?” Ryou muttered out loud and everyone tried to stifle their laughter as they nodded. “I had wondered what had happened.” He shrugged.
“So says the kid who dyed the tips of his white hair black, that of course, includes the bangs.” Malik teased lightly, only to have Ryou stick out his tongue at him. “Don’t stick it out unless you’re planning to use it.”
“Maybe I was.” Ryou countered only to hear Bakura snort.
“Ryou, out of all your weird friends, why did you have to turn out to be the weird Goth type? Really, I would have figured it’d be Yami with all the black leather he wears.” The fiend motioned over to the pharaoh who sat down on the other side of the table.
Yami, having been listening, glared at the tomb robber, “Implying something thief?” He asked acidly.
“Oh nothing. You just wear a lot of leather Yami…not that we mind of course.” Bakura grinned wickedly and Yami only smirked. Everyone knew there was something between them.
Everyone was too busy to notice the slight scowl that crossed over the ‘weird Goth’s’ face.
Wearin' the same dress she wore yesterday
She hides the bruises with linen and lace
Ryou stormed to his next class as soon as the bell had rung. Nobody had noticed his mood however, which wasn’t new. “Weird Goth my ass.” He muttered to himself before he entered the still empty classrooms. There was still ten minutes at least before the other students would start to head back to class, Ryou just had to get away.
It was their last year in high school and he was just finding out the kind of person he was. But he wasn’t the only one who had changed.
Yugi had gotten a little taller, though he’d always be considered short, and had joined the wrestling team last year. Everyone had gone to cheer him on his first match and every match after that and so far, he was undefeated.
Joey had decided on going to university and studying law so he could become a lawyer. He wanted to work with abused kids and give the ones nobody ever listened to justice. He wanted to make a name for himself…and the money was always a nice added bonus as well.
Marik, Bakura and Yami had all decided to become ‘mortals’. They went to school and were like every other kid their ‘age’. They’re records stated that they were all 19 and had each failed a grade, not the same grade of course, but they’d failed one grade, a reason why they were all in the twelfth grade now, instead of already graduated.
Marik, who had been encouraged by Joey and Malik, had decided on going to university to study math. The guy was a whiz when it came to numbers, and as soon as everyone had realized this, they had started going to Marik for help, instead of going to Ryou. Ryou didn’t mind of course since it gave him time to finish his schoolwork and have extra time to himself.
Bakura was going to move on to study archeology. He’d wanted to learn about it ever since he and Ryou’s father had met. Ryou’s father had fully supported the idea of Bakura going onto university and he loved the idea of at least one of his ‘sons’ following in his footsteps and taking an interest in history. Ryou was pretty sure that his father had a new favourite son, but again, he didn’t mind. He knew about Bakura’s past, even if Bakura didn’t and he wanted Bakura to have a second chance at life, a good life this time.
Yami wasn’t totally set on what he wanted to do, but he knew it had something to do with computers. The pharaoh had taken a job at KaibaCorp and even though he and his boss fought like cats and dogs Seto wouldn’t know what to do without his added help with new game ideas and enhancements.
Tristan, who had always wanted to become a cop like his father, had been studying hard to get into the best police academy. The problem was that it was in America and he’d have to go next year if his grade was high enough.
Tea, as always, was practicing hard to become the best dancer she could be, and Ryou had to admit, she was very good. They’d all gone to every one of her performances and she was sure to become a star. She’d already been accepted into Juilliard in the US.
Of course there was Malik, who was planning to go to university to get a teaching degree. (Even though his dream was to become a professional track racer, but neither Isis nor Marik were too thrilled with that idea.)
And last was Ryou. He wasn’t going to be going to university, which didn’t please his father at all, but there was nothing the man could do about it. Every time his father asked what he was going to do with his life, Ryou just told him that he didn’t know. One time he’d told his father exactly what he wanted to do, what his dream was, and as soon as his father had realized that his son was serious he’d shot the dream filled with holes and had outright stated that he would not support Ryou.
That’s what Ryou minded. Though there was really nothing he could do about it now. It wasn’t a coincidence that at the same time Ryou had told him, it was the same time his father started to pay more attention to Bakura. Ryou would just always shrug the stinging pain away; after all, he was used to being ignored.
“Good afternoon Ryou.” The teacher, Mrs. Mitsu, greeted the boy as he sat down at his desk in the back row.
“Afternoon Mrs. Mitsu.” Ryou greeted politely as he slid into the desk. With that, he opened his binder and pulled out a notebook that Aneko Mitsu had seen plenty of times. It was a normal notebook that had a black cover. On the cover had been drawn several images and several quotes had been written with a whiteout pen. None of the images were what any mentally healthy teenager should be drawing and the quotes were sometimes even scary.
Mrs. Mitsu, who had been a teacher Ryou had had ever year since coming to high school, had noticed the change in one of her favourite students. He had isolated himself for some reason and had started to dress…well, different. It was little changes of course, instead of light colours; he’d started to wear a lot of black. Then he’d gotten his ears pierced and then it was his nose. Next he’d started to wear long sleeved shirts, no matter what the weather and then of course, he’d dyed his hair.
There had been no reason to worry though, since Ryou’s grades had not changed and he still seemed pretty happy. Although he seemed happy, Aneko had gone to the counselor and the man had said that Ryou was merely finding a way to express himself. It wasn’t until the boy’d slipped up one day and one of his sleeves had gotten pushed up. It had been during a test and Mrs. Mitsu had seen dark bruises and what appeared to be scratches along the pale skin.
She hadn’t said anything about it to Ryou or to anyone else, but she knew that she had to ask someone, and she knew just who to ask.
The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask
It's hard to see the pain behind the mask
Bakura entered the classroom. When he found no one else there he looked at the teacher and spoke, “I swear I didn’t do it.”
Mrs. Mitsu looked up and blinked in surprised, then began to laugh. “That’s not why I called you here Bakura.” She promised. “Now, please close the door and have a seat. I just want to talk to you.” She smiled warmly.
Truth be told Bakura liked this teacher. He didn’t have her for any of his classes, but he’d seen her around the school and she’d always been nice to him when other teachers wouldn’t. So Bakura closed the door and sat down in the front row, so she wouldn’t have to yell at him if he sat in the back.
Mrs. Mitsu got up from her chair and moved to the front of her desk so they were a little closer. She didn’t want anyone to overhear what they were going to speak about. “Bakura, I have a few questions concerning your brother.”
“Ryou?” Bakura was confused, “What’d he do?”
“He didn’t do anything. I’m just wondering…what’s your home life like?” She wondered. “I mean, nobody has a perfect family and if someone were to say that they did I’d think that there was a problem.”
Bakura shrugged, “It’s usually just Ryou and I there. Dad’s away a lot on his digs and Mom died a long time ago.” He explained.
Mrs. Mitsu sighed. She knew that it wasn’t Bakura that was hurting his brother, she’d seen him around the younger boy and he’d always been very protective and helpful. When Ryou would let him of course.
“Is there something wrong with Ryou?” Bakura’s voice brought her from her musings.
Sighing sadly to herself she sat down in a desk so she was level with the student. “Bakura, I’ve noticed some bruises on Ryou’s arms, along with cuts of some kind. I know that you haven’t done anything, but I also know that Ryou doesn’t have a problem with bullies anymore. And since there is no parent at home, that only leaves one other person who could be hurting him.” She saw Bakura pale slightly.
“Himself.” Bakura swallowed. The thought of Ryou hurting himself, hurt Bakura. As if the kid hadn’t gone through enough pain already, he had to hurt himself?
“I probably shouldn’t have said anything, but I just wanted you to be aware.” Mrs. Mitsu continued but Bakura cut her off.
“No, no…thank you. I…should have noticed myself and much sooner, but…he doesn’t talk to me like he used to.” He sighed. “I’d better get to my next class.” He muttered and got up and left the room.
Bearing the burden of a secret storm
Sometimes she wishes she was never born
“I found it.” Malik announced as he climbed out from under Ryou’s bed. He sat down on the mattress and began to flip through the book within his hands. Bakura joined him and they both read the neatly written print before them.
‘[December 21st]
I now realize what Yugi was going through when he was somewhat living in Yami’s shadow. How could he compete with a mighty pharaoh who practically has control of the Shadow Realm? He couldn’t, so he just stopped trying. Everyone noticed Yugi again because he found interest in different things than Yami.
I found myself in the same position a few months after Battle City. It was kind of weird because I didn’t think anyone would ever trust Bakura. That sounded bad. I have always trusted Bakura, even in the beginning when things were…rough. But even I admit that he did some pretty horrible things and it totally surprised me when he was welcomed within our group. Of course, with Bakura being welcomed, I guess it meant someone had to be pushed out.
That someone was me.
Now, you’d think the solution would be easy, right? Just do what Yugi did and find a few things that I like that Bakura doesn’t. Well, that’s the problem. Bakura’s never liked what I like. I must have tried everything to be noticed again, but nothing ever worked. I’m not usually one who likes attention anyway, but I did like having friends.
Bakura’s always being invited places without me and I guess I don’t mind so much, I mean, as long as he’s happy right? Technically he is a part of me, so at least a part of me is happy too. Yeah, that’s shit and I know it. After Battle City happened and Malik and Marik were accepted within the group, it was great. Malik and I had gotten really close and we’d always talk to each other and do things together, inside and outside the whole group. Now he’s been hanging out with Bakura instead of me. The closest friend I’ve ever had has abandoned me too. I think that it’s mostly my fault though so I can’t blame Malik. Whenever I get a crush on someone I’m close to I usually push them away.
Just last week while we were all sitting together at lunch Joey brought up the idea about a Christmas party for this weekend, considering Friday was the last day of school before the Christmas break. Everyone loved the idea and Yugi volunteered his place, like we’d done the year before. Tea then asked everyone if they could actually make it, knowing that Malik and Marik didn’t celebrate Christmas. She pointedly asked Joey, Tristan, Malik, Marik and Bakura.
You noticed someone’s name missing from that list too, didn’t you?
Um, yeah. Nobody said a thing to me, so I took the hint that I wasn’t invited. Bakura left here an hour ago. At least he said good-bye and hadn’t totally forgotten about me. Tomorrow I’ll probably hear all about the fun they had. Whatever.’
Bakura stopped reading out loud and looked at Malik. Malik looked sadly at Bakura and shook his head; “It’s all true.” Malik whispered as the two of them deciding to read on.
Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she's loved
Concrete Angel
‘December 25th,
Merry Christmas and all that junk. That’s all it is you know. Bull shit actually. Christmas is a stupid holiday to celebrate. It’s only a time for greedy people to get presents and for families to see each other (this would be a good thing about this time of year, if one had a family to see). Forget about the religion crap, there is no god.
I sound kinda bitter, don’t I?
Yeah well, wanna know why? Dad promised he’d come home for Christmas this year, unlike last year and the year before. And guess what! He did! My father actually made it home in time for Christmas! Hold on, that’s not even the best part! He didn’t come home to see me! Oh no, he came home to see, yep, you guessed it! Bakura!
So, last night my father took Bakura out for supper without me. Apparently they had a good time from all the happiness that was radiating from my other half when they got home, around midnight. I had spent my evening watching reruns of some stupid Christmas show about the spirit of Christmas and decorating the damned house because before my wonderful family had left, Dad had muttered something to me that went something like ‘I wonder where I went wrong’ when Bakura was out of earshot. I, however, wasn’t and it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know just who he was talking about.
So, I decorated the house to make him happy. I put up the tree with all the lights and tinsel and garland and everything! There was garland and Santas’ hanging around the doorways and on the walls and there were lights that I’d placed around the window. There were sleigh bells hung on the door and mistletoe placed above the entrance to the kitchen. I’d placed the gifts I’d gotten for Bakura and Dad under the tree.
For supper, I had a sandwich with sandwich meat and mustard and a flat coke.
When they’d finally come home I was hoping for a little credit to all my hard work. I’m not exactly tall and had to do a lot of climbing to get everything in place. My father had looked around while Bakura had gone upstairs and he’d muttered something like ‘Good enough’.
Oh gee Father, I’m so glad that you appreciate all my hard work just to please you! I love you too Daddy!
It’s no wonder I cut myself. One of these days I just might slip up and ‘accidentally’ slice my wrist open.’
“Depressed, isn’t he.” Malik muttered to himself as he flipped the page over.
“But it’s true.” Bakura muttered, ashamed.
‘December 31st,
Well, Dad and I finally had a talk today. May I mention that he’s been here since the twenty third and he’s leaving today, and this was the first conversation we held at all? You mean I didn’t? How forgetful of me.
So Dad and I talked. Well, I talked, he yelled. He wanted to know what I wanted to do next year with my life, probably just wanted to know what the son-that-had-gone-wrong was going to waste money on. I told him that I wasn’t planning on going to school and he wanted to know how I was going to support myself, because he’s ‘not going to be supporting my sorry ass for the rest of my life!’
So I told him.
I told him how I wanted to entertain people with my voice. I admit that I’m not the best, but I’m not bad. I’ve gone to enough auditions to know. I even told him that’d I’d been accepted into a punk band and that I was their lead vocalist. He laughed in my face. My own father laughed in my face. I think his exact words were ‘Oh Ryou, why can’t you be smart like Bakura?’
I wanted to tell him that I’d never be Bakura and that I would never be perfect. I almost had the urge to show him the newest addition to my extensive collection of body art, but then he’d surely look down upon me and it would just be another failure added to the ever-growing list he has for me.
You know how parents aren’t actually supposed to have a favourite child? That’s fucked up. Bakura’s my father’s favourite. Don’t get me wrong, I love Bakura as if he really were my brother, and a lot of the times I wish he were. But my father sees him as perfect and its really starting to piss me off.
Dad found out about Bakura’s…well, he walked in on Bakura and Yami making out anyway and so they talked and he was fine with it. I figured that he’d be fine with me because well hey, like Dark half, like Light half right?
I actually got his attention and he spent about an hour or two talking to me about it. It would have been nice if he hadn’t been yelling at me the entire time about how wrong homosexuality was and how I was going to burn in Hell for my sins.
Hell’s been looking better and better every day. It actually feels like I’m not loved anymore. Hell, I don’t think anyone around here even likes me; they’re probably just putting up with me because I’m ‘Bakura’s other half’. Cast into his shadow again.
But whatever, I guess that all I have now are my childish dreams of future success as an entertainer. Yeah, I admit that they are very childish and really won’t come true. But like everyone says, it’s always nice to dream.’
“Wow.” Malik closed the book, having read all that he wanted to read. Bakura only nodded in agreement. He sighed and shook his head and that’s when he noticed the third figure standing at the door.
He gasped and looked up, right into blazing chocolate eyes.
Somebody cries in the middle of the night
The neighbors hear, but they turn out the lights
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Ryou growled as he stalked over to the bed and ripped the book from Malik’s hands. “What right have you acquired that allows you to come into the only room in the house that is still mine and go through my stuff?” He spat in a yell, glaring at both of his ‘friends’.
“We were worried about you Ryou!” Bakura shouted back, not one to take anything from anyone.
“Worried?” Ryou cocked an eyebrow, “I’m truly touched that I’ve suddenly been noticed, and I hate to make you worry for nothing but I’m no longer looking for your attention, nor do I need it!” He was about to turn away when a strong hand grabbed his wrist, causing the boy to wince and hiss through his teeth at the pain. Whirling around in anger, Ryou came face to face with Malik.
The Egyptian ignored the burning glare Ryou had pinned on him as he pushed Ryou’s sleeve up, revealing grotesque black, blue, and purple skin. The dark bruises were decorated with cuts in the shapes of a language once forgotten.
Bakura glanced at the markings and recognized them as his own language. “The Forgotten One?” He questioned.
Ryou pulled away and replaced his sleeve. “It’s true, isn’t it? Everyone loves you now and somehow, I got pushed into your shadow. I minded at first but I’ve gotten used to it.” He shrugged as he placed his journal in a drawer of his dresser. “It’s just like before we moved here.” His voice was calmer now and that scared Bakura. “I’m used to being alone, remember? It was nice to have friends for a little while but I knew it wouldn’t last.” His voice trailed off, “Besides,” He turned around and faced the two of them, his expression emotionless, his eyes empty. “I have my band and a stupid dream and my other half is happy. What more could I ask for?”
A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate
When morning comes it'll be too late
“Look Ryou, we realized that you were…left out of a lot of things.” Malik began.
“Left out of a lot of things?” Ryou questioned then began to laugh. As he laughed a tear slowly slid down his face. “You don’t even have a clue, do you? None of you do.” He chuckled to himself and gently wiped the tear away, but it was soon replaced with another one. “What did you do on New Years Malik?”
“We were at Seto’s celebrating the New Year.” Malik replied, “And Bakura’s birthday of course.” He shrugged.
Ryou had stopped laughing and was now only smiling sadly to himself, Bakura didn’t even think he was aware of the smile himself. “Yeah, I heard about all the fun you guys had the day we got back to school. When’s your birthday Malik?” He wondered casually.
“September 12th, you know that.”
Ryou nodded, “When’s Marik’s?”
“The same as mine.”
“What do we hikaris share with our other halves?” Ryou crossed his arms.
Malik stopped, realizing what nobody had even thought of before. “Everything.” He whispered, staring down at the carpet.
“Yep.” Ryou continued. “I picked January 1st as Bakura’s birthday for a reason, but I guess it wasn’t important enough for anyone to remember passed the fact that it was Bakura’s birthday.” He stared at the wall, all trace of smile gone; only sadness remained. “It doesn’t actually matter. I mean, you were probably all pretty plastered, at least, by the stories I’ve heard you were. But even so, it would have been really nice to have had someone call me up and wish me a happy birthday too.”
Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she's loved
Concrete Angel
“You pushed us away too you know.” Bakura interjected. “I know that that doesn’t excuse us for letting you.”
Ryou snorted, “I know I did. After I tried all I could to break free of your shadow, I just gave up and started pushing away.” He sighed, “It hurts less when you’re completely abandoned.”
“We’d never abandon you Ryou.” Bakura growled, unable to believe that Ryou could think that.
“Oh?” Ryou looked up; “I wouldn’t be too sure Bakura. What do you thinks going to happen next year?” He asked, “Everyone is going to go off to school. Everyone but me. After graduation I’m moving out and into an apartment with Rei anyway.”
“Rei?” Malik asked.
“He’s in the band.” Ryou explained.
“You really are serious about singing, aren’t you?” Malik realized, he’d never known that about his friend. Ryou had always kept it from him.
“Yeah, I am.” Ryou shrugged, “And, as you’ve probably read, I don’t have support from anyone.”
“You have our support you idiot.” Bakura rolled his eyes.
“He’s right. We’d never make fun of your dreams.” Malik continued, then he smiled, “You’re the only one who took me seriously about becoming a track racer.” His smile turned into a grin.
“You were actually serious?” Bakura made a face.
“See?” Malik glared at Bakura. “Look, Bakura, can I talk to your brother alone?” He asked.
“Fine. But then we’re talking.” Bakura pinned Ryou with his gaze until the younger boy finally nodded. When Bakura was gone and the door was shut, Malik sat back on the bed.
“I’m sorry you know.” He said, breaking the silence that had settled between them.
“It doesn’t matter now.” Ryou shook his head.
“But it does.” Malik insisted, he sighed and motioned for Ryou to sit beside him. Sighing to himself, Ryou moved and sat down on the bed. “Look Ryou, I wish that I could change the things that have happened, but I can’t. I had never had a friend before, at least until you came along. You were everything I imagined a best friend to be. I trusted you and I told you everything, and when you started pushing away from me I got scared. I started to talk to Bakura, hoping he’d know what was up but he didn’t. I guess we got close and losing you wasn’t hurting as much anymore.” Malik sighed and closed his eyes. “I love you okay? I always have and I probably always will. You were and still are my best friend. I miss you.”
Ryou swallowed. “I…I miss you too.” He whispered, but wouldn’t look at Malik.
Malik smiled softly, “You know I’ll always be there for you. Whether it’s to listen to you rant and rave or encourage you to follow your dreams. Either way I’m not going to let you push me away again, so you’re stuck with me now.” He raised an eyebrow as he looked over at Ryou.
Ryou snorted and rolled his eyes, “I suppose I can handle that.” He replied, then grinned.
A statue stands in a shaded place
An angel girl with an upturned face
“Do we have to? We’ve been walking around this damned mall all day!” Bakura complained as he followed the others into a music store. He was only complaining for the hell of it of course, considering he knew how much Yugi wanted the new Lifehouse CD.
“Be quiet tomb robber. Complain, complain, complain. That’s all you ever do!” Yami rolled his eyes as he followed Yugi down one of the CD isles. “I swear, if I didn’t love you so much I’d-” He was interrupted as Bakura grabbed him and kissed him hard.
After pulling away Bakura smirked, “Send me to the Shadow Realm, yeah, yeah, I know.” He moved passed Yami and continued to follow Yugi down the isle.
“New Linkin Park!” Joey grinned as he picked it up and looked at the back.
Marik rolled his eyes at his boyfriend and looked around the store at all the other people. He noticed Malik over in the ‘alternative and punk’ section. Wondering why Malik would ever be in that section since the Egyptian usually just listened to whatever anyone else bought, he wandered over to Malik’s side.
“What’re you lookin’ for?” He wondered as he looked at the names. “Smashmouth? Smashing Pumpkins? Oi.” He shook his head. “Let’s go back to the sane sections.”
Malik chuckled, “You can listen to the Backstreet Boys if you want to Marik, but I’m just looking.” He laughed as Marik glared at him.
“So I happen to find Nick Carter a lot like Joey. Dumb.” Marik replied as he went back over to Joey.
Malik continued to grin as his eyes read over the titles of all the bands. He’d started at the Z’s and had finally gotten down to the F’s. That’s when he saw something that caught his eye. A new band apparently and by the number of copies that had been sold already, the band was pretty popular. He picked up the CD from the ‘Forsaken’ band.
On the CD cover was a stone statue with an angel sitting at the top. The angel seemed to be smiling at the world around her, even though the entire statue was shrouded in a shadow. He looked at the title for the album. “The One the World Forgot?” Malik questioned, then grinned as he turned around, “Bakura! I found it!” He laughed excitedly.
“Really?” Bakura quickly raced over to him, followed by their confused friends.
“Found what? Malik, you don’t listen to punk.” Yugi was confused.
“Who’s that?” Tea wondered as she and Tristan stood by Joey.
“These guys, I do listen to.” Malik grinned and handed the CD over to Bakura.
Bakura quickly flipped the back and on it everyone found a picture of the band. The one in front, and shortest amongst the others was a boy with amazing white hair. The tips had been died black, this included the bangs.
“That’s…” Joey’s eyes went wide. “Ryou?”
Bakura read through the tracks on the album. “The Forgotten One, My Other Half, Dreams Are Like Stars (Sometimes They Crash and Burn), The One the World Forgot, Cut, A Christmas to Forget, Doesn’t Daddy Love Me?, An Unhappy Birthday, To Break Free (Of Your Shadow) and To the One that Holds My Heart.”
“I still say he’s depressed.” Malik shrugged as he took the album from Bakura and went to pay for it.
Since they were done shopping, everyone decided that they’d relax over at the game shop. Not before picking up ice cream from the local store of course. Once everyone was relaxed and the ice cream was all gone, Yugi finally spoke up. “Why don’t we listen to that album you bought Malik?” He suggested and Malik handed him the CD. Yugi placed it within the player and pressed play as he looked inside the CD cover.
Sprawled on the floor, Yugi read through it with a few of the others reading over his shoulder.
“Wow, Ryou wrote all of these songs himself.” Tristan said as they read through the lyrics.
Marik winced, “Pretty disturbing if you ask me.”
Joey rolled his eyes, “Well one, we didn’t ask you. And two, you’re already disturbed.” He stuck out his tongue, only to have Marik pounce on him.
“You know…” Yami began, “This last song? ‘To the One that Holds My Heart’? It sounds awfully familiar.”
Yugi read through the lyrics, “You’re right Yami.” He said, but he knew exactly who the song was dedicated to. It wasn’t hard when you read the dedication in the Thank Yous from the band. “Hmm…‘To the One that Holds My Heart, thanks for everything you’ve ever done for me. You supported me when I didn’t even realize it and I’ll never mind being stuck with you.’ Sounds kinda sweet to me.” He grinned, his eyes straying to Malik for only a split second before turning the page again.
“Who’s he? He’s kinda hot.” Joey exclaimed as they found another member of the band.
“His name’s Rei.” Yugi said, reading through the small bio.
“Did you just call him hot?” Marik growled as he glared at Joey. “Joseph Wheeler!” He pounced again and thus began another wrestling match. Joey could only laugh.
A name is written on a polished rock
A broken heart that the world forgot
Sighing to himself as he dug for his keys, twenty-year-old Ryou yawned. He’d been on a non-stop tour since March of last year and it was finally December and the entire crew got Christmas off. The small apartment that he and Rei shared would be empty for the next two weeks as Rei had family to visit, so Ryou got the entire place to himself.
Looking forward to a hot bath and a soft bed, Ryou unlocked the door and stepped inside. Before he could reach for the light switch however, the lights came on and ‘Surprise’ was yelled in his face.
“Huh?” Ryou was more than a little confused as he glanced at all the smiling faces in front of him. “What are you guys doing here?” He wondered, glancing at Bakura and Malik for an explanation.
“It’s Christmas you idiot, why else would we be here?” Marik replied. “You’ve got two weeks, we’ve got two weeks!”
Bakura cackled as he pulled Ryou into the living room where everyone was gathered. There was music and alcohol and the entire apartment had been decorated for the season. Ryou sat back in an armchair and watched everyone with a smile. As he was watching, someone sat down behind him in the chair, pushing him forward. Unable to see who it was, Ryou was startled as a small gift was handed to him from the hands behind him. Taking the small present he unwrapped it and smiled when he opened the box.
Inside the box was a golden band. It was plain and he picked it up from out of the box, looking at the engraving on the inside. He grinned to himself as he read over the words. ‘From the One that Holds Your Heart’. He pulled the promise ring, for that’s what it was, onto his middle finger and found it to be a perfect fit. With that he settled himself against the warm body behind his and relaxed as strong arms wrapped around him.
They were a perfect fit.
Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she's loved
Concrete Angel
Author’s Notes:
So you know what exactly is happening:
She walks to school with the lunch she packed / Nobody knows what she's holdin' back
Ryou has obviously been left out of a few things and though they aren’t that important they seem to have an impact. He’s hurt but he doesn’t say anything to anyone and obviously hasn’t said anything before either.
Wearin' the same dress she wore yesterday / She hides the bruises with linen and lace
Like in the other ‘Concrete Angel’ fics out there, the reader finds out that Ryou has bruises and cuts, as if he’s being abused on his arms, and probably other places of his body. This sets up for the wonderful idea of ‘Oh! Bakura’s beating Ryou again!’
The teacher wonders but she doesn't ask / It's hard to see the pain behind the mask
In most fics the teacher just ignored what’s going on with Ryou because as the lyrics state ‘The teacher wonders but she doesn’t ask’. Mrs. Mitsu didn’t ask Ryou, but she did however speak to Bakura, because no matter how dumb a teacher is, when a student is in trouble they notice and they never just stand by and watch. *grumbles about the stupid teachers that were at her own high school*
Normally, Bakura would be the one to have caused the wounds on Ryou, but I don’t like an abusive Bakura so here, he obviously isn’t the one inflicting such horrible pain for Ryou. I did give in however and gave hints about their past together, but what really happened is totally up to the reader.
Bearing the burden of a secret storm / Sometimes she wishes she was never born
Yeah, I know, the ‘reading of the journal’ is a little over done, but I didn’t care at the time and needed a way to get Bakura and Malik to know about the pain Ryou was going through. ‘Bearing the burden of a secret storm’ represented Ryou’s feelings and how he kept them to himself.
Through the wind and the rain / She stands hard as a stone / In a world that she can't rise above / But her dreams give her wings / And she flies to a place where she's loved / Concrete Angel
I know it wasn’t mentioned until here, about Ryou’s dreams but the reader wasn’t supposed to know about it until it was revealed. Stupid concept of a dream I realize too, but I liked the idea. It’s a dream many of us have. ‘She stands hard as stone’ in away means that Ryou’s serious about the dream and ‘In a world that she can’t rise above’ means that he knows it’s still a childish dream even if he’s so serious about it.
Somebody cries in the middle of the night / The neighbors hear, but they turn out the lights
Usually this would be the part where the reader would read about how Bakura beat Ryou within the inch of his life and how all the neighbors ignored his cries for help or just his cries. Instead of that, Ryou walks in on the two reading his private thoughts and as many of us would, got upset. He yelled. They yelled. Everyone yelled. And I’m pretty sure someone heard them.
A fragile soul caught in the hands of fate / When morning comes it'll be too late
Ryou pulled away and replaced his sleeve. “It’s true, isn’t it? Everyone loves you now and somehow, I got pushed into your shadow. I minded at first but I’ve gotten used to it.” He shrugged as he placed his journal in a drawer of his dresser. “It’s just like before we moved here.” His voice was calmer now and that scared Bakura. “I’m used to being alone, remember? It was nice to have friends for a little while but I knew it wouldn’t last.” His voice trailed off, “Besides,” He turned around and faced the two of them, his expression emotionless, his eyes empty. “I have my band and a stupid dream and my other half is happy. What more could I ask for?”
He’s obviously got a lot of issues and is somewhat ‘fragile’ emotionally since he feels he hasn’t any support from those who were once close to him. ‘When morning comes it’ll be too late’ does not represent Ryou committing suicide, instead it means that he might have pushed himself so far away from them that they’d never get him back.
Through the wind and the rain / She stands hard as a stone / In a world that she can't rise above / But her dreams give her wings / And she flies to a place where she's loved / Concrete Angel
Most of the time the chorus is just stupid and annoying to work with, it was the same here. Malik (who yes, is the love interest) doesn’t want Ryou to push himself away so tells him that he’s still there for him and that he hasn’t forgotten about him and of course tells him to basically follow his dreams.
A statue stands in a shaded place / An angel girl with an upturned face
It took me a few minutes to actually come up with an idea other than the obvious. Ryou’s dead and his gravestone has an angel on it. But after some muse abuse *smiles at ChibiQuatre Muse* we came up with an idea that I hope can be considered a good one.
Instead of a gravestone, the statue was actually that, a statue. A picture on a CD cover that represented ‘The One the World Forgot’.
A name is written on a polished rock / A broken heart that the world forgot
Again, because there was no death, this had to have a different meaning. Instead of a name carved in stone marking the end of a life, there’s an idea carved in gold marking the beginning of a new life. It’s obvious that it’s Malik behind him at the end and the ring is not supposed to be a sign of marriage or engagement, it’s a friendship/promise ring of the future. Perhaps later on marriage or engagement.
Through the wind and the rain / She stands hard as a stone / In a world that she can't rise above / But her dreams give her wings / And she flies to a place where she's loved / Concrete Angel
About other stuff:
The tracks on Ryou’s album have all come out of the story from somewhere. Also, please don’t take them because they are real songs written by myself that I had decided to use.
And if you’re wondering about ‘Rei’, he wasn’t meant to be from Beyblade, or any other anime, but if you are happy thinking he is then so be it.
» table of contents «