[YGO Fic] Chibi For A Day - Part Thirty One
※ Part Thirty One: The Return of Britney
※ Warnings - None - just remember that this is the unrevised version.
※ Disclaimer - I obviously don't own it.
“Marik, settle down please.” Yami said as his troop walked through the store.
“But I wanna see Joey!” Marik replied as he took Malik’s hand and pouted.
“You can see Joey when we get home.” Seto replied as he pushed the cart filled with baby stuff and two chibis down the isle. They had been shopping for about an hour and already Marik had tried to swipe a few things. This strangely included donuts. It was Malik that put a stop to that as he threatened to cry.
Yami Bakura was content to be carried by the pharaoh, just as long as he could see his light at all times. Ryou sat in the back of the shopping cart, peering out between the metal bars. Every once in a while he’d call out to Yami Bakura to make sure he was still close by. But he was mainly happy to just lie between a diaper bag and a stuffed Red Eyes Black Dragon that had somehow ‘appeared’ when Yami hadn’t been looking.
Joey sat in the front of the cart looking at everything with wide eyes; especially a certain ‘cold hearted’ CEO. His amber eyes would watch Seto’s every move and everywhere Seto went Joey had to go too. It seemed that the infant didn’t like anyone but Kaiba.
“Aw! They’re all so cute!” A strangely familiar voice shrieked as the group rounded a corner.
Yami, Malik and Marik all yelped as a woman with fake breasts and too much makeup on rushed up to them. “Oh! Let me hold one!” She gushed and before anyone could say something she had plucked Joey out of the cart and was trying to suffocate him with her chest.
Joey immediately began to cry for Seto. His high pitched screams of horror didn’t faze the witch at all.
Angry, Seto snatched Joey back. “Who the hell are you?” He asked as he comforted the chibi, who clung to him, as if he’d just been through a life or death situation.
“Oh, I’m Britney. I know your friend here.” She explained as she pointed to Yami. “We met at a swimming pool and he had this oh-so-adorable kid with him. Come to think of it the kid looked a lot like him - oh! Two sets of twins!” She suddenly cried as she fussed over Marik and Malik. At least until Marik reminded her of the Millennium Rod. With that, she turned to Ryou, who was cowering in the cart.
Unfortunately for him he was the cutest chibi anyone had ever laid eyes on. He was pulled into the arms of Satan herself before he could think to scream. “You are the cutest little thing I’ve ever seen!” Britney babbled.
“Don’t caww me cute.” Ryou growled but was completely ignored.
“You have such cute little, well big eyes!”
“Don’t caww me cute.” He tried again.
“And such a cute little nose!”
Ryou’s ‘cute little, well big eyes’ grew wider and began to fill with tears. “Pweas don’t caww me cute?” He tried again.
“Oh and what a cute little voice!”
Scared of the psycho, Ryou looked at Yami for help, but Britney was faster when she said, “Oh! You’re just so cute I could take you home and eat you up!”
With that thought planted in his head cute little chibi Ryou began to cry.
Loudly.
This gained him the attention of everyone in the store. “I don’t wanna weave Batuwa! I don’t wanna go to yous home! I don’t wike you! Don’t eat me! Pweas! Batuwa!” He sobbed and Yami was forced to put a struggling Yami Bakura to the floor and upon hearing Ryou’s cries, Marik had pulled out the Millennium Rod (from where, Yami didn’t even want to know) and the spirit of the Rod and Malik followed the white-haired yami.
Britney, who was not only ignoring the sweet chibi’s pleas, but also the crowd’s suggestions, continued to cuddle the chibi. People had stopped to watch but nobody was sure of what to do. Even Seto stood stunned at the scene, he was just happy that it wasn’t Joey.
“Miss, maybe you should put him down, he doesn’t look very happy.” One woman suggested.
“Poor kid.” Several others muttered.
By this time Yami Bakura had had enough of hearing his light’s cries. He grabbed the golden rod from Marik and held it like a baseball bat. Yami, who was the only one watching the chibi, grinned on impulse just as Yami Bakura swung the Rod, smashing the head into the woman’s knee.
Britney was startled from the pain and let Ryou slip from her arms. Luckily Yami was faster and caught the chibi before he could hit the floor. “Shh Ryou.” Yami whispered as he checked the child over for injury and upon finding none gently wiped his tears away. “Nobody’s going to eat you.” He hushed the hiccuping chibi and Ryou slowly calmed. Exhausted from his crying he rested his head on Yami’s shoulder and slowly fell asleep.
Meanwhile Bitchy Britney had recovered from the blow to her knee and was glaring down at Yami Bakura. “What did you do that for?” She growled.
Yami Bakura (who was all sweet, innocent, shy and quiet until you messed with his other half) growled back. “You touched my Wyou! He asked but you wouldn’t wet him go! Yous is mean and if I get my powa’s back I’m gonna send yous to the Sadow Wealm!” He declared.
Britney blinked then smiled, “You’re as cute as your brother!” She patted Yami Bakura’s head causing the chibi to sweatdrop.
“Come on Bakura, it’s time to go.” Yami said as he held out his hand for the chibi to take. Yami Bakura took the offered hand and followed Yami and Seto, who had gathered Marik and Malik up near the cart.
“Dat was scawy.” Malik whispered to Marik as the two of them huddled in the back of the cart. Marik was quick to agree as he comforted his light.
Seto looked at Yami as he pushed the cart, ignoring that Joey was tapping on each of his fingers, pretending to play the piano. “I agree, that was slightly disturbing. How on earth did you meet her?” He asked.
Yami sighed as he shifted Ryou a little. “It was when Yugi was a chibi. Bakura and I took him, Marik and Malik to the pool and she saw Yugi and wanted to hold him. I told her ‘no’, but she snatched him up. Marik used the Millennium Rod to cut through her bikini top and when she realized what had happened she dropped Yugi into the water. He could’ve drowned!”
Kaiba smirked, “I’ve noticed the two of you getting closer, but I haven’t heard any…noises coming from the room you guys are staying in.”
Yami blushed, “First of all, the room we’re staying in is his grandfather’s, that’s just wrong. Second of all, nobody heard any noise when Bakura and Ryou got together now did we? And what about you and Joey?”
“Mokuba’s always in the room!” Seto snorted as he looked down at the little chibi. He’d gotten bored with playing his ‘piano’ and was now pulling on Marik’s hair.
“Ow!” Marik yelped and pulled away, ducking under the seat so Joey couldn’t reach him. “Babies awe evil!” He declared from his hiding spot.
Yami chuckled, “You’re practically a baby yourself Marik.” He pointed out.
“Am not! I’m a big boy now!” He poked his head out. Then quickly ducked back down as he saw Joey’s hand coming for him. Malik sat back and giggled, at least until Joey’s hand grabbed his Millennium Rod and tugged it out of Malik’s grip.
The Egyptian mortal gasped, “Mine!” He whined as he reached for it, but Joey was faster. The small chibi looked at the golden object curiously, then looked up at Seto. Seto was watching him carefully, and was ready to take the Rod away if it looked like Joey would hurt himself. Smiling largely, Joey stuck the tip of one of the wings in his mouth and began to suck on it.
“Eww!” Malik cried, “Joey swobba! I don’t want it back now!” He sniffled to himself, making Marik come out from his hiding spot to comfort him again.
“I think someone needs a naptime.” Seto raised an eyebrow at the small chibi, who only seemed to glare back at him through his tears.
Yami chuckled again, “I think you’re right, but Malik isn’t the only one.” He said as he felt Yami Bakura dragging behind slightly. He looked back and saw that he was right. “We’re going to pay for these and then we’ll leave, okay?”
Yami Bakura looked up at him, then blinked, “What about wunch?” He wondered as his stomach growled.
“Me hungwy too!” Marik announced.
“Me twee!” Malik followed.
Joey squealed happily as he waved the Rod around, Seto stopped him though before he could hurt someone or himself. He took the Rod away from Joey and handed it back to Malik.
“I don’t wan’ it! He spit on it!” Malik pouted as he hugged his yami. Kaiba growled lowly and Malik quickly took it. With that, Seto grabbed the Red Eyes plushie before Joey could start crying and he handed it to the baby. Joey’s eyes went wide and he hugged it tightly.
“Ba!” Joey announced, naming the plushie.
Yami raised an eyebrow, wondering if ‘Ba’ actually meant something. “Do you think you can stay awake that long?” Yami asked, still speaking to Yami Bakura.
“Uh huh.” Yami Bakura nodded, though Yami was sure he was half asleep now.
“Alright then.” Yami nodded as they walked up to a till.
Everything was rung in (there was a little difficulty with Joey’s new Red Eyes, but it was quickly returned to him) and everything was packed. As Seto called for someone to pick up the things they had bought, Yami took the older chibis into a small restaurant in the store to eat.
The frontline cashier, a woman, smiled as Yami approached. “What would you like to order?” She wondered softly, obviously having seen the sleeping chibi.
“Four kids meals, meal six and meal nine, and some applesauce and a white milk.” Yami said.
The woman rang it in. “That comes to $25.67.” Yami handed her thirty dollars. “Great, here are your cups and the drinks are behind you. Find a seat and I’ll bring your order to you, it looks like you should sit down.” She smiled and handed Yami cups, lids and straws.
“Thanks.” Yami nodded as he handed the straws to Yami Bakura, the lids to Malik and two cups to Marik.
After carefully filling the cups, Yami Bakura and Marik carrying two cups, Malik, who was a little younger, carrying one and Yami carefully carrying the other cup and a still slumbering chibi, the group made their way to a table.
Everyone had just sat down when Kaiba returned with Joey and a highchair and their food was delivered.
A movement in Yami’s arms caused him to look down. Ryou was awake again and he was looking around confused. “Food?” He looked up at the pharaoh and asked.
“Yep.” Yami nodded.
“Yay!” Ryou grinned and turned toward the table and with that, everyone began to eat.
※ Warnings - None - just remember that this is the unrevised version.
※ Disclaimer - I obviously don't own it.
“Marik, settle down please.” Yami said as his troop walked through the store.
“But I wanna see Joey!” Marik replied as he took Malik’s hand and pouted.
“You can see Joey when we get home.” Seto replied as he pushed the cart filled with baby stuff and two chibis down the isle. They had been shopping for about an hour and already Marik had tried to swipe a few things. This strangely included donuts. It was Malik that put a stop to that as he threatened to cry.
Yami Bakura was content to be carried by the pharaoh, just as long as he could see his light at all times. Ryou sat in the back of the shopping cart, peering out between the metal bars. Every once in a while he’d call out to Yami Bakura to make sure he was still close by. But he was mainly happy to just lie between a diaper bag and a stuffed Red Eyes Black Dragon that had somehow ‘appeared’ when Yami hadn’t been looking.
Joey sat in the front of the cart looking at everything with wide eyes; especially a certain ‘cold hearted’ CEO. His amber eyes would watch Seto’s every move and everywhere Seto went Joey had to go too. It seemed that the infant didn’t like anyone but Kaiba.
“Aw! They’re all so cute!” A strangely familiar voice shrieked as the group rounded a corner.
Yami, Malik and Marik all yelped as a woman with fake breasts and too much makeup on rushed up to them. “Oh! Let me hold one!” She gushed and before anyone could say something she had plucked Joey out of the cart and was trying to suffocate him with her chest.
Joey immediately began to cry for Seto. His high pitched screams of horror didn’t faze the witch at all.
Angry, Seto snatched Joey back. “Who the hell are you?” He asked as he comforted the chibi, who clung to him, as if he’d just been through a life or death situation.
“Oh, I’m Britney. I know your friend here.” She explained as she pointed to Yami. “We met at a swimming pool and he had this oh-so-adorable kid with him. Come to think of it the kid looked a lot like him - oh! Two sets of twins!” She suddenly cried as she fussed over Marik and Malik. At least until Marik reminded her of the Millennium Rod. With that, she turned to Ryou, who was cowering in the cart.
Unfortunately for him he was the cutest chibi anyone had ever laid eyes on. He was pulled into the arms of Satan herself before he could think to scream. “You are the cutest little thing I’ve ever seen!” Britney babbled.
“Don’t caww me cute.” Ryou growled but was completely ignored.
“You have such cute little, well big eyes!”
“Don’t caww me cute.” He tried again.
“And such a cute little nose!”
Ryou’s ‘cute little, well big eyes’ grew wider and began to fill with tears. “Pweas don’t caww me cute?” He tried again.
“Oh and what a cute little voice!”
Scared of the psycho, Ryou looked at Yami for help, but Britney was faster when she said, “Oh! You’re just so cute I could take you home and eat you up!”
With that thought planted in his head cute little chibi Ryou began to cry.
Loudly.
This gained him the attention of everyone in the store. “I don’t wanna weave Batuwa! I don’t wanna go to yous home! I don’t wike you! Don’t eat me! Pweas! Batuwa!” He sobbed and Yami was forced to put a struggling Yami Bakura to the floor and upon hearing Ryou’s cries, Marik had pulled out the Millennium Rod (from where, Yami didn’t even want to know) and the spirit of the Rod and Malik followed the white-haired yami.
Britney, who was not only ignoring the sweet chibi’s pleas, but also the crowd’s suggestions, continued to cuddle the chibi. People had stopped to watch but nobody was sure of what to do. Even Seto stood stunned at the scene, he was just happy that it wasn’t Joey.
“Miss, maybe you should put him down, he doesn’t look very happy.” One woman suggested.
“Poor kid.” Several others muttered.
By this time Yami Bakura had had enough of hearing his light’s cries. He grabbed the golden rod from Marik and held it like a baseball bat. Yami, who was the only one watching the chibi, grinned on impulse just as Yami Bakura swung the Rod, smashing the head into the woman’s knee.
Britney was startled from the pain and let Ryou slip from her arms. Luckily Yami was faster and caught the chibi before he could hit the floor. “Shh Ryou.” Yami whispered as he checked the child over for injury and upon finding none gently wiped his tears away. “Nobody’s going to eat you.” He hushed the hiccuping chibi and Ryou slowly calmed. Exhausted from his crying he rested his head on Yami’s shoulder and slowly fell asleep.
Meanwhile Bitchy Britney had recovered from the blow to her knee and was glaring down at Yami Bakura. “What did you do that for?” She growled.
Yami Bakura (who was all sweet, innocent, shy and quiet until you messed with his other half) growled back. “You touched my Wyou! He asked but you wouldn’t wet him go! Yous is mean and if I get my powa’s back I’m gonna send yous to the Sadow Wealm!” He declared.
Britney blinked then smiled, “You’re as cute as your brother!” She patted Yami Bakura’s head causing the chibi to sweatdrop.
“Come on Bakura, it’s time to go.” Yami said as he held out his hand for the chibi to take. Yami Bakura took the offered hand and followed Yami and Seto, who had gathered Marik and Malik up near the cart.
“Dat was scawy.” Malik whispered to Marik as the two of them huddled in the back of the cart. Marik was quick to agree as he comforted his light.
Seto looked at Yami as he pushed the cart, ignoring that Joey was tapping on each of his fingers, pretending to play the piano. “I agree, that was slightly disturbing. How on earth did you meet her?” He asked.
Yami sighed as he shifted Ryou a little. “It was when Yugi was a chibi. Bakura and I took him, Marik and Malik to the pool and she saw Yugi and wanted to hold him. I told her ‘no’, but she snatched him up. Marik used the Millennium Rod to cut through her bikini top and when she realized what had happened she dropped Yugi into the water. He could’ve drowned!”
Kaiba smirked, “I’ve noticed the two of you getting closer, but I haven’t heard any…noises coming from the room you guys are staying in.”
Yami blushed, “First of all, the room we’re staying in is his grandfather’s, that’s just wrong. Second of all, nobody heard any noise when Bakura and Ryou got together now did we? And what about you and Joey?”
“Mokuba’s always in the room!” Seto snorted as he looked down at the little chibi. He’d gotten bored with playing his ‘piano’ and was now pulling on Marik’s hair.
“Ow!” Marik yelped and pulled away, ducking under the seat so Joey couldn’t reach him. “Babies awe evil!” He declared from his hiding spot.
Yami chuckled, “You’re practically a baby yourself Marik.” He pointed out.
“Am not! I’m a big boy now!” He poked his head out. Then quickly ducked back down as he saw Joey’s hand coming for him. Malik sat back and giggled, at least until Joey’s hand grabbed his Millennium Rod and tugged it out of Malik’s grip.
The Egyptian mortal gasped, “Mine!” He whined as he reached for it, but Joey was faster. The small chibi looked at the golden object curiously, then looked up at Seto. Seto was watching him carefully, and was ready to take the Rod away if it looked like Joey would hurt himself. Smiling largely, Joey stuck the tip of one of the wings in his mouth and began to suck on it.
“Eww!” Malik cried, “Joey swobba! I don’t want it back now!” He sniffled to himself, making Marik come out from his hiding spot to comfort him again.
“I think someone needs a naptime.” Seto raised an eyebrow at the small chibi, who only seemed to glare back at him through his tears.
Yami chuckled again, “I think you’re right, but Malik isn’t the only one.” He said as he felt Yami Bakura dragging behind slightly. He looked back and saw that he was right. “We’re going to pay for these and then we’ll leave, okay?”
Yami Bakura looked up at him, then blinked, “What about wunch?” He wondered as his stomach growled.
“Me hungwy too!” Marik announced.
“Me twee!” Malik followed.
Joey squealed happily as he waved the Rod around, Seto stopped him though before he could hurt someone or himself. He took the Rod away from Joey and handed it back to Malik.
“I don’t wan’ it! He spit on it!” Malik pouted as he hugged his yami. Kaiba growled lowly and Malik quickly took it. With that, Seto grabbed the Red Eyes plushie before Joey could start crying and he handed it to the baby. Joey’s eyes went wide and he hugged it tightly.
“Ba!” Joey announced, naming the plushie.
Yami raised an eyebrow, wondering if ‘Ba’ actually meant something. “Do you think you can stay awake that long?” Yami asked, still speaking to Yami Bakura.
“Uh huh.” Yami Bakura nodded, though Yami was sure he was half asleep now.
“Alright then.” Yami nodded as they walked up to a till.
Everything was rung in (there was a little difficulty with Joey’s new Red Eyes, but it was quickly returned to him) and everything was packed. As Seto called for someone to pick up the things they had bought, Yami took the older chibis into a small restaurant in the store to eat.
The frontline cashier, a woman, smiled as Yami approached. “What would you like to order?” She wondered softly, obviously having seen the sleeping chibi.
“Four kids meals, meal six and meal nine, and some applesauce and a white milk.” Yami said.
The woman rang it in. “That comes to $25.67.” Yami handed her thirty dollars. “Great, here are your cups and the drinks are behind you. Find a seat and I’ll bring your order to you, it looks like you should sit down.” She smiled and handed Yami cups, lids and straws.
“Thanks.” Yami nodded as he handed the straws to Yami Bakura, the lids to Malik and two cups to Marik.
After carefully filling the cups, Yami Bakura and Marik carrying two cups, Malik, who was a little younger, carrying one and Yami carefully carrying the other cup and a still slumbering chibi, the group made their way to a table.
Everyone had just sat down when Kaiba returned with Joey and a highchair and their food was delivered.
A movement in Yami’s arms caused him to look down. Ryou was awake again and he was looking around confused. “Food?” He looked up at the pharaoh and asked.
“Yep.” Yami nodded.
“Yay!” Ryou grinned and turned toward the table and with that, everyone began to eat.