[Counted Stars] - It's Not My Fault! Memory Swap Event
"Water- 35 liters, carbon- 20 kilograms, ammonia- 4 liters, lime- 1.5 kilograms..."
So cheap are the components that make up the human body.
"...phosphorous- 800 grams, sodium- 250 grams, potassium- 100 grams, sulfur- 80 grams, fluoride- 7.5 grams, iron- 5 grams, silicon- 3 grams..."
Her smile was warmer than any summer day. Just the thought of being able to see her again...
It's forbidden.
"Accepting the flow, understanding it and using it to create... That's what makes an alchemist an alchemist. But the flow extends far beyond the world we know. Death and new life are all a part of that great, harmonious system. That's why we should never try to bring anyone back to life."
Your teacher's words were clear that day, but even though there seemed to be some deeper foreboding in them, you're not about to be swayed. The whole reason you and your brother even looked into finding a formal alchemy teacher is for this moment.
The books all say it. Human transmutation is something that should never be done.
But you've done the research. You've no doubt in your mind. It's possible. Your age has never been something to hold you back. You're eleven, your brother is ten. Your mother had said you had a knack for understanding alchemy. Its principles, its method and application are pretty easy to grasp, and with your teacher's not-so-traditional tutelage, you're more than certain that you have this down.
You know you can pull this off.
Alphonse dumps the last of the ingredients into the center of the ring you've set up in the basement of your house; your father's study. That grin on his face reflects your own- you're so close.
"So what's the first thing you're gonna say to mom?"
You have to laugh. "That's easy- 'Don't tell our teacher!'" She'd probably skin you both alive.
The necessary array for this and all its runes are practically etched in your mind for how much you've studied them. It seems almost too simple, drawing them now, but it's the most complex array either of you have ever worked with.
"Last but not least..."
"...part of our soul."
The pain is nothing- a quick slice across a finger, the blood wells up and then dribbles down. Alphonse extends his hand alongside yours, bright red drops falling onto the top of the mixture. This is it.
"Let's do it, Al."
"Right!"
You can't help but hold your breath- it's been several years since your mother's death. Finally, finally you'll be able to see her again. You're finally fulfilling what you've both committed to do, that day you stood by her grave. Kneeling down, your hands are placed on the edge of the circle. It doesn't take long at all. The flow of power has been established. The transmutation starts..!
...and it's working...! It's working! You can feel the energy as it rushes around you and focuses on the mound before you.
....wait.
Something isn't right. It's this creeping unease that you just can't shake. Stealing a glance at Alphonse, you can see that he's noticed it too.
"...Ed...something's wrong..!"
No! No, it can't- how could something be wrong? Your formula, everything should have been perfe- AL?!
-this isn't happening. This isn't- He's screaming, watching his arm start to vanish. He's vanishing and you can't do anything? Hell no-
What are those things grabbing at him? Black things that look...like hands?
"Al!" You throw your arm out towards him, but you can't reach! Something's holding you back, you realize- You can practically feel your heart leap up in your throat as you look down. Your leg. It's grabbing your leg. Your leg. Your leg is disappearing... Energy's surging around you like crazy. The awful realization hits you like a punch in the face.
It's a Rebound!!
"Ed!! Help me, Ed!! Please!" It's Alphonse. Your brother- he's almost gone-! It hurts, but you can't leave him- just a little closer, you can almost reach him! Al! Your hand stretches, but you're still too far. All you can do is watch the last of his fingers disintegrate before your eyes. Something cracks around you, and then suddenly the world goes black.
Not a breath later, everything explodes in a blinding white.
It's so white you can't tell where the ground is, but you're standing on something solid so surely it must be existent. There's no horizon, no concept of distance. You can't remember what was happening. Where is Al? And where are you, for that matter?
Behind you, a large stone doorway floats, carved with names and symbols that you feel should mean something to you.
And then someone speaks. You're not the only one here after all. You miss it at a glance, but someone's definitely there. Its form can barely be made out. Is it even human? "Who are you?"
"Oh! I'm so glad you asked. I'm what you all would call "the world." Or "the universe." Or "god." Or "truth." Or "all." Or "one."
"One is all, all is one." Who told you that? Those words strike a familiar chord.
"...and...I'm "You."
Those words make you shudder. You don't like this, and you don't have time for it. Alphonse is somewhere and you need to find him, but before you can say anything, you have this awful feeling of being watched. The doors have opened- you know this somehow, even though you haven't looked back, but out of the corner of your eye you catch movement; those black tendrils again, grasping at you once more to drag you through!
"Welcome...you arrogant fool."
Those words intoned as casual as its greeting, and despite having no face, it watches you as you fight to keep from being pulled in. It's a one-sided battle. Your screams do nothing. The doors soon flank you, and nothing but darkness seems to well from within.
"Hush now. This is what you've been longing for, isn't it?"
The doors begin to swing shut, and you're yanked completely off your feet, eerie words spoken just as darkness seals you in:
"I'll show you the truth."
Images flash before your eyes- and for a brief moment you wonder if you're dying. But this isn't simply your life flashing before you. Streams of scenes flood your mind; time lapses at high speed- life, death, formation and deterioration, familiar faces, your daily experiences, the things you've read and studied, even things you can't even place as from your own subconscious so much as the world. You can't look away. Your head feels like it's about to burst. Once again you start to feel yourself disappearing, taken apart fragment by fragment.
You see an eye, red and wide, expectant and staring straight through you.
And just when you think you can't take any more, you see her...
Mom...
Weakly you reach out for her, and you see her reaching back. Your arm is vanishing.
Everything goes white again, and the thick doors slam shut behind you as you find yourself whole and standing before them again, hand yet outstretched.
"How was it?"
It's that thing again. It gestures idly with its vague outline of a hand. It takes you a moment to catch your breath, to comprehend what you'd just experienced. Things slowly begin to click.
"It felt like...like all the secrets of the world were pouring into my brain... My head hurts...but somehow I was able to instantly comprehend everything..." Elation builds, and you can't take your eyes off those mysterious doors. Your hands reach for them, resting upon the cold surface. "So this is...The Truth!
"I see... My formula for human transmutation wasn't flawed...it just wasn't complete! I just need a little more time! The thing that I'm looking for is just a little further ahead! The truth about human transmutation was definitely in there!" Determination grips you again, and almost eagerly you glance back towards the other figure. "I'm begging you! Let me see it one more time! Just once mo-"
The words that cut you off are spoken so nonchalantly.
"No. No. That's all I can show you for the toll that you paid."
That doesn't sound good. "The toll?!"
The thing rises to its feet. One of its legs materializes; its left leg.
"That's right. The toll," it replies- just as your left leg vanishes below the knee. And suddenly that figure is right there beside you, and you can see it grin. Its following words are like a glacier sliding down your spine. "You remember the Law of Equivalent Exchange...don't you, alchemist?"
All you can hear is yourself screaming. The pain is immense, and you grasp futilely at the bloody stump of your left leg. The ground grows warm beneath you, darkness pooling. You shout for Alphonse, but he doesn't answer; he's not there. His clothes are haphazardly strewn about the floor. You're back in the basement, and reality has ceased to hold its breath for you.
You're alone.
"Damn! Damn it! How could this have happened? It wasn't supposed to be like this... He's...he's gone...!"
There's no one to hear your pitiful lament. No one to help you as you drag yourself across the floor, as though perhaps you'll find some sign of your brother.
"...Somebody... Help me..." So weak. You hate being weak. You're starting to feel dizzy, desperate. "Mom!!" Your arm falters beneath you and you collapse to the floor, raising your head towards the array, seeking salvation. "...mom..."
Something moves, but what you see isn't human. Ribs lie splayed like a carcass, an arm juts out, perhaps the only normal looking appendage save for its placement. The head that stares at you- you know it's staring at you, and despite the form, it is alive, and struggles to breathe. You can't look away. It can't be. It's not right. Blood spurts from its gaping mouth and the slender hand collapses amidst growing pool of crimson and long, dark locks-
You feel sick, it's more than you can bear.
...and yet, once you've heaved the contents of your stomach, you refuse to give up. You refuse to believe that this is how things will end.
"This can't be...no... this isn't...I didn't want this!" It becomes progressively harder to move, to focus for all the blood loss, but you have to. You manage to tie a tourniquet around your leg for what good it will do. Desperation and adrenaline fuel you now. "Al... It's all my fault... my fault..."
Dad's antique suit of armor goes crashing down after your efforts. Your focus is only on getting your brother back. You're not thinking of anything else. Blood is painted by your finger, another array. The seal between you and your brother, the blood that binds you as family.
"Give him back! I don't care what the toll is! Take my other leg! Or my arm! Take both of them!"
Weariness and fear have given way to anger. You'll take him back by force if you have to. Bloodied hands are lifted with what strength you have left.
"You can even have my heart!" You mean that. You mean every word, and its with every fiber of your being, every point of your consciousness that you will into your words. "Just...give him back!! He's the only family I have!!"
A circle. The flow of power. You yourself are the runes. Your hands clap together.
Once again
you
open
the
Door.