✘if it makes you less sad
Here's the deal- I feel like a piece of shit. This isn't some stupid pity entry- really, if you're going to leave me pity, I'd prefer you didn't comment. I just need to vent, and this is the best place for me to do it.
I feel like dropping from every RP I'm in, just because I don't feel like I can do anything at all justice. I want to crawl into a big dark hole and sleep for the next eternity, because I hate my writing, I hate my art, and I hate myself. I feel like a disgusting speck of dust stuck on a beautifully shimmering gem- and no matter what I do, I'll always never be good enough for anyone. I'm... a jack of all trades, master of none. I should get used to that. Because honestly? I'll probably never have a life I'll be proud of. I may as well accept that, because I can't do anything.
I have no idea what the fuck is going on with her, but apparently she couldn't give two fucks about what's happening to me so I'm too tired to argue any more.
My mum is sick, and we have no money. Our money stops coming next month. My dad still doesn't have a job, and I can't work because I'm so fucked up I can't even leave the house without someone with me. I don't even know how it happened, but I think I have a phobia of the outside world and I think I have a serious case of paranoia because I think anyone who looks at me thinks I'm just as disgusting as I feel. Waste of skin, etc- but I'm not stupid enough to commit suicide. No, that's something I'll never do because I love my mum too much to do that to her.
The pills barely work, and I hate everything I do.
I want to drop everything and just go sleep forever. I'm fed up with the life I'm living, and I can't see any way to change it.
Oh, and my laptop's broken. Sending it away for two weeks or so, so I'm at least going to have to set up hiatuses everywhere I am.
Also, this song is pretty much my anthem right now, and has been for months.
I feel like dropping from every RP I'm in, just because I don't feel like I can do anything at all justice. I want to crawl into a big dark hole and sleep for the next eternity, because I hate my writing, I hate my art, and I hate myself. I feel like a disgusting speck of dust stuck on a beautifully shimmering gem- and no matter what I do, I'll always never be good enough for anyone. I'm... a jack of all trades, master of none. I should get used to that. Because honestly? I'll probably never have a life I'll be proud of. I may as well accept that, because I can't do anything.
I have no idea what the fuck is going on with her, but apparently she couldn't give two fucks about what's happening to me so I'm too tired to argue any more.
My mum is sick, and we have no money. Our money stops coming next month. My dad still doesn't have a job, and I can't work because I'm so fucked up I can't even leave the house without someone with me. I don't even know how it happened, but I think I have a phobia of the outside world and I think I have a serious case of paranoia because I think anyone who looks at me thinks I'm just as disgusting as I feel. Waste of skin, etc- but I'm not stupid enough to commit suicide. No, that's something I'll never do because I love my mum too much to do that to her.
The pills barely work, and I hate everything I do.
I want to drop everything and just go sleep forever. I'm fed up with the life I'm living, and I can't see any way to change it.
Oh, and my laptop's broken. Sending it away for two weeks or so, so I'm at least going to have to set up hiatuses everywhere I am.
Also, this song is pretty much my anthem right now, and has been for months.