Title: the depressing fic of many more to come
Pairings/Characters: England + Australia.
Summary: She's not ready to let go, yet.
Rating: PG
Notes: Depression of the 1930's. ;~; 1932, specifically, which is when it was still at its worst. P.S. this killed me. >: And I cannot stop writing.
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It's been a while since England has visited Australia; lately, he's found himself with so little time that he can barely pull himself away from a desk of paperwork and crowds of people complaining about the lack of jobs, of income, of supplies and food - it's quite painful to watch his entire nation suffer, and there's just no opportunity for him to break away from it for anything else. So he sends who he needs over there, without so much as a word from himself - men to investigate the state of the economy over there, to demand adjustments where they are needed. His country needs the money, and she just needs to pay back her loans.
Because of the time it's been since he last walked the streets of the country, he's shocked and faintly horrified when he arrives in Sydney to see men lying on the streets, brawls outside of pubs, and people leaving the city on horseback with little more than a pack of food scraps. He knows that the Depression is bound to have an impact, but he hasn't seen the place laid to waste this badly in decades, and it makes him worry for the state of the country herself.
He finds himself hurrying to her house, and he can't help but notice along the way, the way in which people recoil from him, the doors slamming and locking; people are retreating as he walks through the street, but he doesn't have the time to care or wonder about such a thing, and he lets himself into Australia's house quickly, ignoring the eyes on his back.
He calls out for her as soon as he locks the door behind him, but there's no reply, and he can't find her anywhere downstairs. For a moment, he can't think of why she would be upstairs unless she's sleeping, but then he recalls that she has a study up there, and makes his way up the stairs to find her.
He's never seen her use her study before, and the idea of his lively colony bent over a desk and surrounded by papers is something that doesn't sit well with him; his stomach twists and knots unpleasantly, and he goes up the steps two at a time.
The door to the study is closed, but there's light slipping out through under the crack, and he opens it, a little hesitantly - he's not entirely sure what he's supposed to anticipate, but he's sure that he won't like it, whatever it may be.
He turns out to be entirely correct.
As soon as the knob is turned, he hears another click, and a scraping sound from inside the room; once the door is opened, he is met with the barrel of a handgun aimed perfectly between his eyes, and a shaking Australia holding it with both of her hands. He freezes, and she reacts similarly.
"... Australia?" he says, quietly, and the gun clatters to the floor.
"England," she whispers, wide-eyed, and it's dreadful that he can't tell whether it's voluntary, or whether she's lost her voice. "I-I didn't know it was--" And then, to his increasing horror, her shoulders tense, rise, and she recoils, stumbling away from him with an almost fearful expression, catching herself on the desk behind her. "Why're you here?"
He takes a moment to look her over, and it pains him just to see what the Depression is doing to his little girl; she's deathly pale from head to toe, but her face is utterly ghastly, and the huge black rings under her eyes just make it stand out all the more. He's not sure whether it's from his visit or from fatigue, but she's trembling violently, barely able to hold herself on her feet. There are bruises on her arms, and a particularly nasty one on her neck, and he recalls the brawling he saw on the streets with a surge of fury.
But it's gone in flash, because he remembers why he has finally come to visit her.
"You look dreadful," he says sadly, staying on the other side of the room for the moment. Her eyes are wild, and he's not sure how she'll respond if he tries to move any closer.
"Why are you here?" she repeats, louder, and he's marginally relieved to hear that her voice is still intact, if a little hoarse. He can't bring himself to tell her yet, and suddenly, her fear is mixed with anger, and her shaking increases as she's forced to come up with her own answers that he won't provide. "More debts t' collect? Going to change my economy to suit your needs again? You bloody bastard, I haven't seen you in years, and this is what you visit me for--"
"We're cutting ties," he mumbles, and her words die in her throat, coming up with a choking sound.
She stares.
"... What?" Even her voice has a tremor to it, now, but England forces himself to meet her eyes, expression carefully blank and steely.
"I regret to inform you," he says, struggling to keep his voice at a constant volume, "that Britain has reached the decision it believes is best for both economies, and will bring about an end to the Depression all the more quickly. The United Kingdom will be cutting all colonial and dominion ties with Australia within no more than a month; at that time, you will be required to pay back all loans, and you will be expected to attend a meeting in which the action will be formally confirmed."
The anger has dissipated, and all that's left is that heart-breaking mix of shock and fear. "You're..." Her hands creep up to cover her mouth, eyes wide and face gaunt. "You're... cuttin' ties with me...?" He nods, avoiding her eye again, and she barely fights back the sudden urge to retch. "Why...?"
"I just told you," he sighs, tired, and turns to leave, hand resting on the doorknob. "I'm sorry that that's all I came to visit for. I do hope you get better soon."
He should have been expecting it, but he's surprised when she latches onto his arm, and he turns, startled to see her eyes brimming with tears - and although, at first, she looks furious, it passes quickly and instead she's only desperate, scared and panicked.
"You can't!" she cries, and he opens his mouth to snap back that he most certainly can, she's his colony, but she rapidly continues, "You're lying, that's not bloody fair! You-- you stupid git, it won't be better for anyone this way - have you seen them?! They're dying, England, and I can't do anything!"
Australia's grip is strong, but he wrenches his arm free and pins her with a glare that makes her recoil. "I'm sorry that your country is in such a bad state, and I understand the difficult times you are going through, but--"
"No, you don't!" she shrieks, and he's startled, because he hasn't seen her lose her temper like this for a long time, and he's not sure what has suddenly set it off. "Apparently, y'don't understand, because if you did, you wouldn't be abandoning me! They're not just dropping dead for no reason, you twat, look at me!" She sweeps a hand down her arm, indicating the dark bruises there. "They're killing each other!! And - and Communism, and - and -" She's breaking down into hysterics, and her hands recoil; she rubs the tears from her face with heels of her palms, breath hitching and coming in shaking gasps. "And nobody knows what t' do! You can't just fucking abandon me!!"
That strikes him, finally. "Abandon you...?"
"Yes," she chokes, still scrubbing at her eyes frantically, shoulders shaking with her heaving sobs. "Y'think it's just for your money, and your Empire? I'm your colony, for fuck's sake, you're my dad, you can't just leave me like this out of th' fucking blue!"
She's on the verge of collapse, and despite that he's still shell-shocked, England turns away again and tugs the door open sharply. All he has to do is take a step into the hallway and she suddenly moves, too fast, but he can't catch what it is until it's too late; he hears the click of the pistol being cocked once again, and freezes.
"You can't," she says, voice reaching a high, whispery whine. He glances back at her, but while she's trying her best to look intimidating, all he can see is his scared little girl - the one that hid from the Englishmen invading her land, that glued herself to his side against the will of her native people, that fought him in a blind panic during the Gold Rush. Realisation comes around and hits him full force when finally, pleading, she says, "I won't allow it."
"Australia--" It's difficult to swallow past the lump building in his throat, the uncomfortable tightness of his chest, but he manages, and calmly, catches her eye and tells her, "For God's sake, Australia, put the gun down."
It's an instant reaction. Australia's fingers unwrap and her hands snap apart, and the gun hits the floor with a heavy thud. She doesn't even think about it, just obeys silently, and a thought creeps up on him that he hasn't had since the American Revolution.
He doesn't want to lose her.
The situation is oddly reversed to how it was back then, and it just makes him feel all the more nauseous. How could I do this to her?
"Please, England," she begs quietly, voice cracking with desperation. "Please, you can't - bloody hell, 'm just a kid, I'm a teenager, I don't know what I'm doing."
She's not ready for independence, and he's not even sure that he wants her to be.
It turns out that she's wasted all the strength she had left, and she keels forward all of a sudden. England whips around and manages to catch her around the middle before she can hit the floor, but she's long past the point of exhaustion, and she's not going to be getting up any time soon, so he lifts her into his arms and carries her down the hall, into her room. He lays her out on the bed, tucks the covers in and tugs them up to her chin, and then he lies beside her, and even if it won't be any time soon, he stays by her side and he waits for her to wake up, the same way he would when she was still a child, and they never had these problems between them.
He won't leave her.
Because maybe then, she'll never leave him.
Notes:
- In the late 1920's, unable to solve Britain's enormous financial problems of the time, the country put large pressure on Australia for the repayment of loans, and stories began to travel in the British capital about the lack of effective management of the Australian economy.
- There was a clash when the Bank of England sent out their own money-man to investigate the rumours, and the Labor Party leaders saw him as the 'British debt collector'. This led to a battle between the financial conservatives and the Labor Party that whipped up hysteria that was as much fiction as fact.
- 1930's marked the beginning of a quite severe depression in Australia (which had been building up since 1927), lasting until 1932; while the higher classes suffered almost no change, the average worker worked himself to the bone to scrounge up food for his family, and lived in constant fear of a retrenchment notice.
- The problem was only furthered by the fact that no lead power or intellectual seemed to be able to agree on a solution, and instead, the issue was met with many different answers.
- In 1932, Britain actually attempted to cut colonial and dominion ties with Australia -- Australia, however, was reluctant to let go, and clung desperately to a lost ideal of Empire solidarity and a new Britain in the antipodes.
- The law was quite often at war with its citizens, especially over property evictions; neighbours would fight police until their barricades were broken down and they were left bruised. In June 1931, there was a particularly bad incident that ended up involving gunfire and an hour long hand-to-hand fight, and became known as 'Bloody Friday'.
- Naturally, for every fight against evictions, and for everything else that went wrong in Australia during the 1930's, the media and the conservative politicians blamed the Communists.
- Throughout all of the 1930's, immigration to Australia decreased drastically, and racism became frighteningly more common and violent in towns, specifically, after one certain incident where an Italian killed an Australian in a bar, against Italian and Yugoslav migrants.
(~ from Australia in the 1930's by Matthew Williams)