I just want everything to stay away from me. I can't take it. It's like I'm going to explode. I have not been so close to killing myself in almost 3 years. I don't understand. I don't understand
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Jess.... I know I don't fully understand the magnitude of this Hell you're living in, I know we aren't exactly best of friends, and, yes, I know that I don't hold the key to your happiness. The truth of it is, Jess, is that you hold the key to your own happiness. I wish you wouldn't call yourself a whore or a monster these multitudes of other things I hate to know run through your mind and heart
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You inspired a poem. Go figure. It's not related to what your going through, but you'll see how you inspired it. Besides, a poem might do you some good....
“I cannot breathe”
I cannot breathe- My lungs are filled to burst with emptiness. The intake of oxygen will do worse than kill me- it will send the emptiness back to my heart where it never should have been. My broken heart still clings to broken love and refuses to allow the emptiness in. I need to breathe-I know I do- but I would rather have my lungs collapse than carry an empty heart. A dear friend whispers "Your heart was never empty. Breathe for both our sakes." And my heart skips a beat as it takes its first breath.
Im not going to try to understand whats going on. But it does sound like something bad. All I can say is that there are people that do care about you, even if you dont think so. So dont do anything to hurt yourself...just hope that whatever is going on will all end soon
jessimica, you are one of the most amazing people i know. if you ever EVER need anything, i'm here for you. you have many people who care about you that are willing to support you when it may seem that no one else does. you should have my cell number, and if you don't, i'll give it to you. ok? i promised you i'd always be here for you and i'm going to KEEP that promise. i love you so much, you are one of my very best friends, no matter how far away you are, not matter what you do, no matter how you behave.
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It's not related to what your going through, but you'll see how you inspired it. Besides, a poem might do you some good....
“I cannot breathe”
I cannot breathe-
My lungs are filled to burst with emptiness.
The intake of oxygen will do worse than kill me-
it will send the emptiness back to my heart
where it never should have been.
My broken heart still clings to broken love
and refuses to allow the emptiness in.
I need to breathe-I know I do-
but I would rather have my lungs collapse
than carry an empty heart.
A dear friend whispers
"Your heart was never empty.
Breathe for both our sakes."
And my heart skips a beat
as it takes its first breath.
Feel better, Jess. For both our sakes. =/
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<3
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you are still my friend.
<3
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