(Untitled)

[urawrd]

So, I was texting oz_the_bobble about Robert Webb taking David Mitchell's virginity, as you do, and she said 'I think this should be a meme. Mitchell and Webb's first time (and more especially first for Mitchell). LET'S WRITE THESE SUCKERS.' So, here we are.

THAT MITCHELL/WEBB FIRST TIME MEME
It can be AU, or Cambridge fic, or even just a drunken mistake, as

Comments

[onneonlights]

I CANNOT TELL YOU HOW AWKWARD AND DELIGHTFUL THE THOUGHTS THIS PUTS IN MY MIND ARE. THEY ARE SO DELIGHTFUL I FEEL THE NEED TO POST THIS COMMENT EVEN THOUGH IT ISN'T FIC OR ANYTHING. UH. SORRY. BUT *___*

[urawrd]

I'M TRYING TO WRITE IT RIGHT NOW AND IT'S ALREADY THE MOST AWKWARD THING EVER, AND THEY HAVEN'T EVEN MET. I THINK ANYTHING WITH DAVID MITCHELL HAS TO BE AWKWARD AND AWESOME.

NEVER APOLOGISE FOR COMMENTS LIKE THAT DUDE, THEY'RE STILL SO VERY WELCOME. :DDD

[onneonlights]

ALL I'M REALLY IMAGINING IS THEM BEING AT CAMBRIDGE AND GETTING DRUNK (BECAUSE I'M SURE IT MUST HAVE HAPPENED AT LEAST ONCE, EVEN TO DAVID MITCHELL) AND DAVID'S INTERNAL MONOLOGUE JUST BEING ALL, LIKE, GOSH, THIS IS DIFFERENT, I'M NOT SURE I DID THE WISEST THING DRINKING ALL THAT PUNCH ALTHOUGH IT DIDN'T TASTE ALL THAT ALCOHOLIC AND WHERE ON EARTH DID ROBERT'S TROUSERS GO, ANYWAY, THEY WERE CERTAINLY ON HIS LEGS LAST TIME I LOOKED, AND IT'S PROBABLY A BIT ODD THAT I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS LONG, ACTUALLY, BETTER LOOK AWAY. OH, LOOK, THERE THEY ARE ON THE FLOOR. HOW STRANGE.

[urawrd]

...*___________________________*

TELL ME MOAR.

[urawrd]

EEEEEE I AM SO PLEASED! \O/ ALSO, THE THOUGHT OF ROB PUSHING DAVID UP AGAINST A WALL? NNNNNNNGH.

(CAPSLOCK IS SO THE BEST THING EVER. I <3 IT VERY MUCH.)

[urawrd]

I have joined! Yay you for creating it! \o/\o/\o/! I'll post as soon as I'm approved! :D

lol awkward (titles are not my speciality) part 1

[urawrd]

It starts when David gets dragged to a party that he really doesn't want to go to. Everyone tells him that he absolutely has to be there, and that it'll be the party of the century and, "You have to go, David, it's Saturday night! No-one stays in on a Saturday night!" After the last remark, David had cast a longing look at the pile of books beside his bed, and opened his wardrobe to get ready.

He settles on a blue shirt that his parents sent to him a few weeks ago, and pairs it with a dark pair of jeans. Nobody bothered to tell him the dress code for the party, so he hopes that his outfit isn't too formal. Or too casual, depending on the party goers. The thought strikes him that oh, God, it might be one of those parties, and in that case, he'd be wearing far too many clothes no matter what. Then, of course, the rational part of his brain (the one that sounds like his mother) kicks in and tells him to stop being an idiot

lol awkward (titles are not my speciality) part 2

[urawrd]

Somehow, he finds himself in what he assumes is Robert's room. He vaguely remembers Robert saying, "Come back to mine with me," after a lot of kissing, and his head saying no but his mouth (and his cock) saying yes, so that probably had something to do with the situation. He doesn't really care that much though, because they're kissing again, but this time Robert is grinding against him, and it's probably the best thing he's felt since he discovered masturbation.

Robert moves his mouth away from David's - which David thinks is a really bad idea because apparently the noises he could hear where coming from him - and leans up to growl, "I wanna see your pretty little mouth on my cock

lol awkward (titles are not my speciality) part 3

[urawrd]

David doesn't even have to think about his reply. "Well, I'm not going to refuse that."

"Good," Robert says. He leans in and kisses him again, then moves down the bed, brushing his hands over David's ribs until he reaches the button on his jeans. He pops that open and takes both them and his underwear off, throwing them away from the bed.

David is suddenly terrified, and it must show on his face, because Robert presses a kiss to the inside of David's thigh and says, "Stop worrying so much, you're about to get your cock sucked. Enjoy it!"

And then.

Oh, and then David is actually getting his cock sucked, and it's pretty much the best thing in the world. Robert's mouth is hot and wet, and he really knows what he's doing with his tongue, and fuck, David really isn't going to last long. He tries to tell Robert this, but what comes out is a strangled moan. Robert groans around him, and David fists his hands in the bed sheets, accidentally thrusting up into Robert's mouth

Re: lol awkward (titles are not my speciality) part 3

[notpoetry]

EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS AMAZING

I seriously busted out in a big giant grin at this line:

"I've seen you around, asked a few people. You know, the regular things you do when you like someone."

BECAUSE AW, YES. Robert! Picking up David because he likes him! And he wants David's first time to be special!

AGH SO FANTASTIC.

(Also god I love your awkward wee Cambridge virgin!David. I WANT TO KISS HIS STUPID FAAAACE, god, so adorable.)

Fic: Cheap

[notpoetry]

David exits the men's room, and enters the main room of the pub to whoops and laughs. He checks downward where he's been wiping his hands dry on his trousers, then looks up again -- the laughs weren't directed at him, he realizes, but at Brydon, holding court.

"So no, Lee," Rob finishes, sweeping a hand at the man giggling near-hysterically into his pint. "Under no circumstances, including one in which you had transformed magically into a seven-breasted virgin dancer girl," and David has to laugh at that one, coming up behind the table to slide into the seat between Tara Palmer-Tompkinson (why he thinks, fucking Mack is the one who invited her, desperate to get her to take off her shirt, the cock) and Rob Brydon, "would I ever contemplate the idea of taking you to bed

Re: Fic: Cheap (pt 2)

[notpoetry]

The door's unlocked when he gets there -- he has a key, but Robert always unlocks it for him when David texts ahead. "Hello," he says to Robert, who's sitting at the kitchen counter with a bottle of beer and the newspaper. "Bit late for that, isn't it? I mean, it's literally yesterday's news, at this point

Re: Fic: Cheap (pt 2)

[urawrd]

YOU ARE A WONDERFUL PERSON AND YOU SHOULD FEEL HAPPY ABOUT THE DECISIONS YOU MAKE IN LIFE.

I mean, um. ♥___♥

(Also, your Rob Brydon voice was spot on. Woah, he was good.)

Re: Fic: Cheap (pt 2)

[notpoetry]

HOORAY! I AM HAPPY! \o/

And aw, yay, I'm glad you liked my Brydon!!

(Personally, my favorite part is Tara Parker-Tompkinson and her two stupid, stupid lines. She is like a Greek chorus of dumb and I love her.)