Twelfth Night...

[urbankazoos]

So here it is, ya'll--Chapter 9. It's definitely one of my favorites and there's a reason. Watch our for the perspective here in the beginning. It's important! Thanks so much for your feedback. Hope to see a bit more of it, maybe. But if not, I hope you're still reading, at least. It would be a shame if I was just writing this for myself...and my

Comments

[shala54]

Loved it! I'm officially in LOVE with Kat. And that was no shocker with Robin. What a little bitch lol. Can't wait for the next update. :)

[urbankazoos]

While I'm a little concerned that you're now in love with a rather strange fictional character, I'm glad you liked the chapter. And yeah, Robin's definitely bad news. Let me know how everything works out between you and Kat ;)

Star

[anonymous]

I Adore You. it definitely is an amazing work, keep up, can't wait for an update. you just got this meticulous way of writing characters, like shaping complex sculptures, and breathing in them spirit and flavor. you just make one hungry, so terribly hungry for something exceptional. each chapter is some chic, alive organism. you hit such subtle targets that to common eye aren't even visible and that is the true work of someone vulnerable. someone who not merely concocts it's characters, but "FEELS" them.

Ashley Evening

Re: Star

[urbankazoos]

Wow. That's quite a lot of compliments wrapped up in one deceptively innocent paragraph! I really, really appreciate you taking the time to read and respond, and I'm very happy that my mission is being recognized. That mission being to create the most realistic dialogue possible, while maintaining the depth of each character in the paragraphs in between. And I trust your opinion considering how much of a writer your feedback reveals you to be. Thanks again, and PLEASE, keep reviewing.

[befri44]

I KNEW I HATED ROBIN FOR A REASON!!!
Gah.. throw her off a cliff next chapter yes?
And I'm glad that she's a good enough aquaintance to look out for the girl.
And the thing Spencer said is what Ashley wrote in her Yearbook isn't it?!?!
And she doesn't remember that it's Ashley, but well obviously Ashley will know it's her quote.
Oh Lord this is getting more perfectly suspenseful as we go! haha
What made you decide to put this in Kat's POV?
I liked the change though. Getting inside her crazy ass head and understanding her and Ashley's relationship better.
Can't wait for the next one. =D

[urbankazoos]

I wasn't exactly planning to throw Robin off a cliff for the next chapter, but I'll see what kind of edits I can make. :)

Ashley definitely recognized the quote, and Spencer repeating it to her is probably doing all sorts of crazy things to her right about now. We'll get the inner-workings of her process in the next chapter.

I chose to put this chapter in Kat's perspective because we're about mid-way through the first part of this story and I wanted to pull back a bit and throw in a more narrative perspective. I think it's important to know what all of this is coming across like to an "outsider" and how obvious the things are that both Spencer and Ashley might not see as obvious, you know?

Thanks a lot for taking the time to shoot me a review and I'm glad you liked it!

brilliant

[willowon3]

omg! kat's pov is brilliantly written. a good insight of what a true friend she is to ashley despite her bluntness. maybe I need to be like her n not be too reserved. I'd prolly be more at ease with myself. I dunno, just musing.

anyway, spencer quoting ashley's words from the yearbook is priceless. and the reference of M night shyamalan is just clever. like u, I like this chapter too. now we're going somewhere. I hope robin wld come clean with spencer and end it. kat is not only a good friend to ashley, but to spencer too. man! I love her. you crack me up writing kat

ok its official, kat is my rock! I want one like her. as a friend that is hihi.

oh btw, u finally let us in on jonica's deal with ashley in prev chapter. knew u wld finally come to that. thanks for that :)

Re: brilliant

[urbankazoos]

I think we all need a friend like Kat. Obviously I've always wanted one because this character has to exist in my brain for a reason, right?

M. Night is...man, I don't know about that guy. I've wanted to reference him for awhile (for some reason) and so that was a dream realized. If it was anywhere close to an accurate description than I achieved my goal. And yes, Spencer using Ashley's quote is a huge reveal. We now know that whatever it is that Ashley wrote was both read by Spencer and significant to her.

You're welcome to borrow Kat for awhile as long as you promise to bring her back in time for the next chapter. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

[nautic187]

I've said it before but I love how differently you're able to write your perspective shifts, there's never any doubt in my mind when it occurs or who the first person is. Who else but the amazing Kat would inner dialogue a line like: ...because in the human interaction quilt, the patches are literally covering something up and the seams are lies and romantic relationships frolic in the chaos like innocent children in a field of land mines.?

And I love how she brought some celery over to her intervention, haha. This is intriguing and kind of heartbreaking: “Why would she be jealous of me?” she asks. It’s sincere-not even a pathetic fish for compliments. It pains me to realize just how pure she was meant to but couldn’t be. We only had Ashley's explanation about what happened at the beginning because it's the thing that Spencer won't, probably can't talk or think about about without breaking, but it's a nice reminder that there's more going on under the surface than even just the serpentine high-school crush storyline

[urbankazoos]

I always count on you as my compass for how well I'm succeeding in my chapter by chapter writing goals. In fact, as I was writing the first paragraph of Kat, I thought, "If nautic immediately picks up on the fact that this is a new perspective, I'll consider it mission accomplished." And so you did. Yay me :)

Oh--and of course you noticed the celery. Just a bit of continuity.

So yeah, there are a lot of underlying issues still. As a ff writer, I can hopefully draw those out and deal with them in a pace that fits the story realistically. Both Spencer and Ashley are ignoring these really big parts of themselves in the present, as well as historically. Breaking the characters down so that they can deal with that through inner and outer monologue/dialogue will be the challenge to me--and I'm very excited about it.

Is Spencer tagging along for the HMB trip? And if so, how many eyerolls will Kat NOT suppress? These are questions that will be answered with the next chapter.

[nautic187]

Well, you kinda tipped it off in the beginning with that "watch out for the perspective" thing, but the point is you don't really need to. On the other hand, I just saw someone admit to being confused about an obvious flashback segment (written all in italic) in another story, and have seen people ask for script style writing because it was apparently too hard for them to decipher first person perspective in another, so, um, yeah...

Also I totally forgot to mention but Jena Fucking Malone. I loved her in Donnie Darko and Saved, but yeah, haven't really seen much of her lately.