(no subject)
Uuuuuuugh I am so mad. I had my whole wonderful entry and then I screwed up and exited out of livejournal instead of google. Grr. So now I must remember everything I complained about and retype it. Woo. Effin. Hoo.
Okay,
Numero One- Screw this whole "Friends Only" crap. Whoever wants to read my livejournal, GO FOR IT! HAVE FUN!!
Numero Two- MY NECK IS SUNBURNED!!! ARRRRGH!! Figures when I actually have enough time to get a burn (which will turn into a tan) I am at a concert where I can't wear a swimsuit. So, tomorrow after I do my stupid history project I have to go lay out and try and even out my burn. That should be fun.
So I don't know if I mentioned this before, my parents are getting divorced yet again, yes the fourth time!! And we thought third was a charm. So yea. I kind of want them to get divorced. In a way. It is so much easier just to deal with one parent at a time rather than two. But then that means I have to switch houses (well actually house to apartment) all the time. Which I HATE. I don't like living in apartments with my mom. Too crowded. I will also have to share a room with my brother. So, I don't know I mean I think that I would rather have them be divorced. I mean they can barely stand each other. The only reason they kept getting back together all the time was because "we want you and your brother to grow up with two normal parents" (and if my mom quit drugs). Screw that. I mean, I don't care if they are divorced or not. I just find it stupid that they feel the need to stay together because of their kids. I am miserable living with both of them because all they do is fight and yell. Then they are both all pissy and take it out on me. Never Jeff, me. More things that bug me: they are making me see a counselor. Ugggh, I am fed up with them. Why the hell do I need a freaking counselor?? My mom's excuse was "Well, Jeff thinks it's unfair he has to go to one and you don't, so you're going too." Well, who is the one that writes poems about killing kids? Sure as hell NOT me. Ugh.
Okay, enough on that topic. Time to move on. Boys. Boys are so confusing. I don't even think they know they are, they are that confusing. Anyways, the point I was making with this is I think I like someone, but I know I don't like him. If that made any sense at all. I mean I know I don't like him cause lust is overall stupid. But then I like him because I love lust. And I know I don't like him because I just, well, can't. But then I like him because I like attention. But seriously people, guys give EVERY half way decent (even less in my case) girl attention. So, I don't like him. I don't even want a boyfriend. Wait, that's a half lie. I do, kinda, and don't, kinda. I want someone who understands I just can't emotionally be in a relationship right now because I am not ready. Well, I am READY, just it is too much right now. At least until school gets out. I want someone who knows that I'm not ready for a relationship right now, but will love me anyways. And only me. I am so selfish. But honestly right now I don't care. I really don't.
Okay, I think that is enough for tonight. It is 2:30 AM, and I am wide awake. So it is time to go in my room before my dad wakes up for work and gets pissed at me for being on the comp.
Good night<3