My first entry
Другие записи: День 2010.07.20, Точное время 13:49:00 | День 2010.10.10, Точное время 18:40:00 | люди | День 2029.01.14, Точное время 23:12:00
I had a live journal like five years ago, but I I had to make a new one for privacy reasons and because I couldn't remember my password lol.
I have sever journals in hand write in, but most of the time I feel like writing on the computer. Sometimes it is easier and other times I like to get some feed back. I am the type of person, were I have so much in my head and I can't organize it or put it into perspective by myself. I have learning disiblilties and ADD so I can't always word everything right and my spelling sucks ass!!! Myright click is broken so I can't always spell check which sucks. I use easier words a lot of the time because of that. It is really frusterating ( can't figure out why that is misspelled) to have what I have. With the careers that I want to,which shall remain nameless, it makes it hard to get through. I picked it because I love it and I am really good at it, the problem is there are four exams I have to to get my license and I can't pass the main one yet. I have taken it twice and I have had tutoring, taken classes and have a prep book on it. I can't freaking pass the thing. I have spent 4 years on this, I will be graduating this summer with my BA. For my program I need one year of grad school and the exams before I get the whole degree. So I have one more year to go total. I am so damn fed up with never being able to freaking do anything with out having a problem. I know that anything worth having is worth fighting for,but I have had to fight for EVERYTHING in my whole life. I am tired and want a little break for once. I want this so bad and have sacrifced a lot to get this far, I want my whole degree damn it! Life is hard and for me it is even harder. When everyday is a stuggle it really sucks when bull crap stands in your way. I know it sounds like I am saying poor me, feel bad for me, but I am not. I know that everyone has problems , that I am not a lone and that other people have to work really hard because of one thing or another. I know that! I am just telling you what I am feeling, I can't help what or how I am feeling, I have tried. I have gone to therapy and all of that. That is not what I need... I need to write what I am feeling and have my story be told from my point of view. That is what this for isn't ? Don't get me wrong, I am not depress, I am very thankful to be alive!!! I have a great family, friends and a great boyfriend who loves me and I love him too. It's just for the past 21 and a half years I have been in school and it has been hard from day one. Just ask my mom if you don't believe me.