Perspective

[destiny_hearts]

Characters: Roxas and Sora (destiny_hearts), Axel (nobodywatchthis)
Setting: A cliff overlooking the harbor
Time: Friday evening
Description: Axel takes Roxas out for a birthday picnic. But when Roxas falls asleep, Sora wakes up, and gets a very rough surprise.
Style: AIM
Warnings: Boys doing somewhat more immoral things to each other.


Axel had asked Sora to ask Roxas to be ready to go out around seven, and he hoped he'd actually remembered the pass along the message since he was late actually getting up to their apartment. If they lost more time, they'd probably never get where he wanted to go by the time he wanted to be there. He tightened the straps on his backpack slightly and knocked on Roxas's door.

Sora had actually been very careful to tell Roxas this time, with a note in the journal and another on the fridge. But Roxas almost missed the time anyway. He was still hurriedly fixing the spikes in his hair as he opened the door. "Hey," he said. He looked happy enough to see Axel, but... distracted? Tired?

"You all right?" Axel asked as he leaned down and pressed a kiss to Roxas's cheek. He sounded a little worried; he didn't want to try to drag Roxas out into the woods while it was getting dark if he wasn't feeling up to it.

"Fine." Roxas leaned his forehead against Axel's shoulder, like he was drawing energy from the touch. And he did look a little better when he looked up. "I'm fine. Let's go."

"I wanted to drag you out into the woods," Axel said uncertainly. "If you're not feeling good, we can stay in..."

"No, please, let's go," Roxas said. "Somewhere I won't see anyone sounds great. And then distract me."

Axel gave a brief laugh, then motioned for Roxas to follow him downstairs as he started off down the hall. "I think I can manage that. And happy birthday."

"Thanks." Roxas fiddled with his hair some more as he followed Axel down. "Did Sora tell you about Florian?" There was no harm in it, they were shouting his name all over the islands.

Axel looked over his shoulder and raised an eyebrow. "No, I didn't really get a chance to talk to him for long. What's wrong?"

"He got kidnapped. Someone just kicked his door open and grabbed him. It's been three days."

Axel let out a long breath and said, "Oh. Yeah, I just... I thought you meant there was... something new that happened with it."

"We got a description of the kidnapper. I've been walking around town all day trying to spot her..." Roxas shook his head. "Never mind. Let's talk about something else, okay? Distract me."

Axel quirked an eyebrow, surprised that it was a woman, and wanted to ask what the description was, exactly. But if Roxas didn't want to talk about it, he didn't want to make him - at least not tonight. So he found something else to talk about as they headed out the back door of the building and away from the hospital.

As they got further away from anywhere people lived, Roxas walked closer and closer to Axel, until he was walking with his shoulder against Axel's arm. And as they hiked up a hill along the shoreline, Axel finally got Roxas to laugh.

When Roxas laughed was when Axel finally decided that he was probably in a good enough mood to be a little more casual with him, and he reached down and took his hand. "You know, now that you're sixteen, I guess I can stop feeling like such a filthy pervert. What's that rule? Divided by two plus seven?"

"Heh, you'll always be a filthy perv to me. At least you won't get arrested now, though."

"Hey, we haven't done anything even remotely arrest-worthy," Axel said flippantly.

"Yet."

Axel drew a somewhat sharp breath, and he forced himself not to look at Roxas, hoping to keep Roxas from seeing how red his face was turning. "Yeah. Not yet," he mumbled.

Roxas suddenly felt awkward. "I'm not trying to... push or anything. It's just - that's where this goes, isn't it? It's not just noodles and making out forever. That stuff was great, but I've been, y'know. Thinking."

"You have?" Axel exclaimed, pulling Roxas to a stop simply because he wasn't sure if he could walk up an uneven slope and think about this particular subject at the same time. "I mean... okay, pretend I didn't sound that shocked. I just... you're not pushing. At all. But I worked through most of my... issues... a long time ago. You know? And I guess I thought that you... probably... hadn't. Yet."

Roxas blinked. "Did you think... Axel, I hit puberty three years ago on a tropical island where 'play clothes' means 'swim trunks.' It's not like I never noticed before. I mean, I still don't know what I'm doing, and I guess I'm still not used to feeling okay about this stuff, but the thinking part is not completely new."

Axel rolled his eyes a little, and mostly at himself, but he was smiling as he said, "Well, I know you think, who doesn't, but... you know. Or you don't. I don't know. Forget I said anything." And a moment later, he was kissing Roxas like maybe that would make him forget he said anything.

Roxas laughed into the kiss. But he waited until Axel came up for air to mumble, "I didn't mean you should jump me right now. Weren't we going somewhere?" And he gave Axel another long, slow kiss before letting him answer.

Axel sighed slightly when he pulled away, smirked, and said as he turned and pulled Roxas off in the same direction they'd been headed, "That's not jumping you. You'll know when I jump you."

"Maybe I should jump you," Roxas mused. He wasn't serious - well, okay, he was a little, but he wasn't thinking about doing it right away or anything. "Maybe then you'll stop pushing and dragging me all over the place."

"Is it really my fault you're so cute and portable?" Axel asked. His face was still a little flushed as he glanced over at Roxas.

"Stop calling me cute," Roxas grumped. "You make me sound like a stuffed cat."

Axel grumbled, "All right. Since it's your birthday, I'll admit that cute isn't actually the first word that springs to mind when I think of you. It's just what I tone down my opinion to."

Roxas imagined what the original word might have been, and felt the back of his neck getting warm. "Perv," he muttered. "Are we almost there? I've been walking all day."

"I think so," Axel said, giving Roxas's hand a little squeeze. He hadn't actually walked out here before; he'd just seen the spot from a distance and thought that it looked nice. But as it turned out, it was only a couple more minutes before the trees began to thin out and Axel realized they were almost to the top of the hill. Fortunately, because the sun was just starting to set.

It was a cliff above the inner shore of the island, maybe part of the rim of the original volcano. The still tropical-blue of the harbor shimmered below the red sky, and in the distance Roxas could see lights coming on in the town on Caventou. "Not bad," he admitted. He took a seat on the edge of the cliff, dangling his sneakers over the edge.

"Yeah, it's... a change from my couch." Axel was actually rather afraid of heights; he always had been. But he was also the sort of person who overcompensated in order to hide fears, so he sat down next to Roxas and tried not to tremble as he put his feet over the edge, or as he took hold of Roxas's hand again and pretended it wasn't because he was nervous.

Roxas slid right up next to Axel, and squeezed his hand. "This is the part I never thought about," he said.

"The part of what?" Axel asked. He'd been watching the sun, but he looked over at Roxas now, raising an eyebrow.

"The... you know. When I was thinking. Especially before I met you. I thought a lot about sweaty and strange and touching and no shirts on, but... not this." He squeezed Axel's hand again.

Axel grinned and moved his left foot over to hook under Roxas's right so that their legs were crossed. "I don't think most people lie awake in bed fantasizing about holding hands. Except maybe... Mormons or something, I dunno. I think it's nice, though. Or at least something good to go between the 'nice to meet you' and the no-pants part."

Roxas leaned his head on Axel's shoulder. The height difference was just about perfect, from this perspective.

Axel was silent for a few minutes, just enjoying the warmth of Roxas and the setting sun, but then he reached over for his backpack and, with a bit of difficulty using one hand, got it open and pulled out a smallish wrapped box. "Don't drop this," he said as he offered it to Roxas. "It's breakable and it's a long way down."

Roxas had to pull his hands free for this. He set the package in his lap and peeled the wrapping off.

The box was small because the camera Axel had picked was compact. He'd agonized for a while at the store about what kind to get, since he'd already decided that money wasn't an object, but in the end he'd gone for something relatively simple, portable, and red. The color had turned out to be something he considered important. "I really hope you can figure out something fun to do with that."

"A camera? You... got me a camera?" Roxas was intrigued, but also confused - it seemed so random. "How did you come up with this? Or was it Sora's idea?" Axel had asked him what to get Sora, but he knew Roxas better. Roxas hadn't been sure if he'd asked Sora the same question or not. Sora hadn't mentioned it, but he wouldn't.

"It was Sora's suggestion," Axel admitted. "I told him if he didn't give me a better idea, I was going to buy you underwear. He said you wouldn't be happy about that."

You didn't start a shoving match at the edge of a cliff, but Roxas was tempted. "This... would work a little better than descriptions in a journal," he mused. "And then... I dunno." That wasn't quite right, it was more that there were too many half-formed thoughts to articulate. Roxas turned the box over and over, thinking. Finally, he pulled up his feet and pushed himself well back from the edge, so he could open the package and take the actual camera out.

When he realized Roxas was going to open the box, Axel leaned back on one elbow to look at him and said, "Hey, if you don't think you really wanna use it, I have the receipt. I just suck pretty hard at picking out gifts."

"Don't be an idiot," Roxas said absently. He figured out how to power the thing up, and studied the screen and buttons for a couple seconds. Then, without warning, he picked it up and took a quick snap of Axel.

Axel got his hand up to block the lens too late to stop the picture. "Ugh, I probably look like a complete tool, you jerk," he grumbled. "And I'm pre-empting you implying that I always look like a tool."

"Yeah, I bet you look awful in pictures," Roxas agreed absently, trying to figure out how to look at his shot.

Axel narrowed his eyes a bit, then humphed and sat back up to watch the sunset, leaving Roxas to fiddle with the camera.

"When you smile on purpose it looks terrible. Like you're angry, or like the person you're talking to is an idiot. I've seen you do it at work. You're always going to look like crap in posed pictures." He finally found the key he wanted. "Here, look." He turned the camera so Axel could see the picture. The light was funny and the frame was crooked, but Axel could make out his face - a curious, uncertain half-smile, and an oddly powerful warmth and focus in his green eyes.

"The people I'm talking to are always idiots," Axel insisted, looking at the photo reluctantly. "Yeah, I look like crap," he grumbled, but the way he kept staring at it didn't make it seem like he really meant it. Actually, he didn't really think he looked like himself in the picture. Something about... hm. He wasn't sure. He looked strange.

Roxas smirked a little. Everyone else got the go-away-you-idiot smile. He got this. And suddenly it came to him - this was how he'd tell Sora. This picture. That was what would make it make sense. This is what I see - get it?

The camera came with a little fake-leather traveling pouch. Roxas slipped it inside, zipped it carefully, and put the whole thing in his pocket. "Thanks, Axel," he said.

"No problem," Axel replied, feeling extremely self-conscious. Maybe this was why he had trouble picking out gifts - he found giving them a little embarrassing. Like having to tell someone exactly what you thought of them. "Take lots of pictures of yourself and send 'em to me or something. Happy birthday."

"What else is in that bag?" Roxas asked. "Because Sora reminded me three times you said not to eat before you came."

"Mostly sandwiches. And some other junk I threw in there. You can look," Axel replied. "I wanted to take you out, but... I'd feel pretty shitty if I did and then got fired and sent home. And that's kind of an understatement."

"I need to not be your patient anymore, that's all," Roxas said. He dug into the bag and pulled out a sandwich. "Huh, what's on this?" he mused, but took a bite before Axel had a chance to answer.

"Tomato, mozzarella, and basil," Axel answered anyway, even though it didn't really matter anymore. "I thought I'd make you something pretentious."

"Wow." Another bite. "Feel free to pretense again some time."

"Just for you, Roxas." Axel took a sandwich for himself, even though he wasn't feeling particularly hungry. He tended to eat a lot of the ingredients when he was making food.

"I thought sandwiches were just easy," Roxas said between bites. Apparently you had to know what things to use... "Remind me to ask you what groceries to buy sometime. Ours never taste like this."

"I'll take you to the store sometime." Axel couldn't keep from smiling. He didn't consider himself a particularly brilliant cook, but Roxas made him feel like he could win Iron Chef. All he had to do was keep complimenting Axel and he'd be set on meals for life.

Roxas caught the smile. "Maybe I just have low standards now, though. It's been ages since I ate Mom's cooking. I guess I don't remember what really good food tastes like, now, so I settle for this."

And once again, Axel's eyes narrowed slightly. "Thanks, Rox. You really know how to compliment a guy."

Roxas grinned. His sandwich had already disappeared, and he reached for another one - there was, in fact, another one.

Axel went rather quiet and worked on his own much more slowly as he watched the sun sink below the horizon. It was, he considered, turning out to be a bit of a strange evening, and he wasn't entirely sure why.

Roxas moved up next to Axel, and went back to the same position as before, feet dangling off the edge, head on Axel's shoulder. This time Roxas' free hand was wrapped around his waist.

Even though Axel reciprocated by wrapping his own arm around Roxas, he was quiet for a minute more. Then, without warning, he suddenly leaned over and bit Roxas's ear.

Roxas squawked, and the end of his sandwich slipped out of his hand. It tumbled end over end and hit the water with a splash they couldn't hear at this height. "That's it," Roxas growled. He twisted, got a knee under him, and pushed Axel back down onto the grass. Roxas straddled him and pinned him down by his shoulders. He took a moment for an appraising look and a grin, and then leaned in to kiss him.

"Mmph." Axel's hands were almost immediately in Roxas's hair, pulling him in to deepen the kiss after just a few moments. He thought he'd shown admirable restraint this evening, especially compared to, say, last week, when he'd burned dinner because he'd been too busy making out with Roxas against the counter next to the stove. But as soon as Roxas pushed him onto his back, it became abundantly clear that that restraint had just gone right off the cliff as well.

Roxas was actually remembering the same night. Had his mouth not been busy, he'd have pointed out that when he had Axel pinned against something, nothing caught on fire. Instead, he tried applying some of the things he'd learned about tongues...

Axel ended up exceedingly glad that he'd remembered to bring a blanket - even if only a thin one - once they'd lost their shirts. The ground probably wouldn't have been exactly fun to be lying on after that, and he didn't want to stop. That wasn't to say that he didn't, though. He did finally pull back to catch his breath, and he was beginning to suspect that they'd probably gone far enough for now.

Roxas let his head fall onto Axel's shoulder - a very convenient spot, he decided. He was panting. Axel's hands were getting more adventurous lately, and he hadn't really argued this time. At least they'd only been adventuring on the outside of his pants. "Thanks," he mumbled. It was sort of a tradition by now.

Axel had given up on telling Roxas to stop thanking him. Now he just laughed softly, letting his hands come to rest on the small of Roxas's back and turning his head just a bit so that their cheeks were pressed together. And it was right there, really, so he bit Roxas's ear again, more playfully this time.

"Umm. Don't start that again." Roxas' hand rubbed softly at Axel's ribs, keeping clear of the ticklish spots he'd just found. Making him squirm was fun, but not when Roxas was just getting comfortable. He closed his eyes.

"I'm not starting anything," Axel murmured. "I wasn't starting anything before, either. This whole thing was all your fault..."

"Biting me is starting it," Roxas answered, though only someone whose ear was three inches from Roxas' mouth would have understood. "You were trying to get me to jump you. While I was eating. Again."

"It was still your choice to actually do it," Axel insisted. "And I'm pretty sure you enjoy it, so don't complain."

Roxas didn't answer. He focused on the warmth of Axel's hands on the skin of his back. Too bad there wasn't something like a camera for the sense of touch.

Axel realized, after a minute, that he was in immediate danger of falling asleep, and the irony in that was that he was feeling way too happy and complacent to even stop himself.

Roxas gave Axel's cheek a last, sleepy nuzzle, and then went still. It was dark now, but still warm. There was a breeze off the sea. Roxas thought he could hear Axel's pulse...

Axel felt him twitch, as though he'd been started awake by something. Then he twisted away, scrambling like a crab. "Wha - Axel? What are you doing?"

Axel had only been dozing, so his eyes flew open immediately and he sat up. "I didn't do anything!" he exclaimed before he realized what, exactly, he was being asked and by whom. It was a reflex answer more than anything. But then realization slowly dawned on his face. "Oh, shit."

"Where's the shirt?!" Sora's breathing was fast, shallow - panicked. "What did you do to Roxas?!"

Axel looked completely mortified, but he grabbed Roxas's shirt from his other side and held it out to Sora. To his credit, he still managed to answer, "I didn't do anything to him!"

Sora snatched the shirt away, and then backed up another five feet. "Then what the hell was that? Treating him for hypothermia? You're a pervert!"

Axel scowled, and he grabbed his own shirt and pulled it back on. Even if Roxas said that word teasingly now, he was still rather sick of hearing it. "I'm not," he snapped. "I don't do any more than he wants. He jumped me."

Sora looked even more confused - but at least he stopped shouting. "What? You mean he just randomly thought it would be fun to jump on you and pull your shirt off and..." Some of that flush was embarrassment now as well as anger. "… do stuff?"

Axel rubbed his face with one hand, trying to think of how to phrase this. "It wasn't random. We've been... um. It's been a while. We didn't... we were going to... he was going to tell you."

"You're lying," Sora said, though for some reason his voice didn't sound certain in his own ears. "Roxas tells me everything. We have to tell each other everything. He wouldn't have kept it secret." Sora would... shade the truth, sometimes, or keep a secret to make a surprise. But he'd never just completely hide something this huge. And Roxas wouldn't either. Right?

"You've been under too much stress already," Axel said quickly, realizing maybe he'd said the wrong thing and that Roxas might be pretty angry at him later. But it was too late now, so he added, "Look, Sora. I like Roxas a lot. I care about him. I'm the reason he dyed your hair, because I wanted to see him, so I'm pretty sure he must like me a lot too. I'm not a pervert."

Sora's hand felt at his Roxas-ish spikes. "It was your idea?" It should have been Sora's idea. He should have done it himself and let Roxas wake up to it as a surprise, but it had come from Axel. And Roxas had complained about the hair so much, he had to love it. "You're really boyfriends?"

"Yes," Axel sighed, slumping forward now that he was pretty sure Sora wasn't going to lunge for his throat. "And before you ask, I haven't done anything to him yet." Well, it was Sora's business. It was his body too.

Sora sat down. "I can't believe he didn't tell me. How could he not tell me?"

"He wanted to wait until you had less on your mind." Axel was running his fingers through his hair now, trying to comb it out a little but mostly just because he was tense. "And maybe he didn't know how you'd take it. I don't know."

"What, because you're a guy? Who cares about that, compared to this?" Sora's hands made fists. "If we don't talk to each other, we don't have a life. We're just two strangers with messed up memories." Tighter fists. "If we don't talk to each other, we are crazy."

"He does talk to you!" Axel exclaimed. "You've gotta give each other some space, don't you? Maybe he wasn't ready to say anything yet. Maybe you just needed to let him have some time for us to... I don't know, work this out." He thought it'd been pretty well worked out for a while, but... well, Sora didn't know that.

"What space? There's no distance between us, Axel. There is no space. I could have hurt you, just now. I almost did. What if I met a girl and she didn't know about Roxas, and she caught you? What if he was really tired or something and I switched in during instead of after?" Sora's hands were shaking. "I need to trust him, and he's lying to me."

"We were planning to tell you," Axel insisted. "We've been careful. I can be careful since I know about you. I just... made a mistake falling asleep now. I wasn't thinking, but it won't happen again." It honestly hadn't occurred to him before. He was just now realizing that he'd never be able to fall asleep with Roxas, and he found the thought rather depressing.

"You don't know what it's like," Sora said. "When half your life just isn't there. I'd look up and not know where I was. People would be mad at me for things I was sure I'd never done. Things would move around my room. The days didn't go in order. I knew there were seven of them, but the calendar didn't make sense because I knew time didn't work that way. The world was crazy. I was crazy. The only thing that stopped it was the journal. Because we told each other everything."

"You still do!" Axel was beginning to worry that Sora was going to be really upset by this and stay really upset by it. "He just wanted to wait a little while. Nobody else knows, Sora. We've been careful not to... not to even leave any bruises, so nobody will guess. It's not like he doesn't think of you."

"What was he waiting for?"

"For things with all of your friends to calm down, so you wouldn't have more to worry about," Axel muttered. At least, that was what Roxas had said. That was what Axel wanted to believe, because he wanted to think if there was something more, Roxas would've told him. He wondered if that made him a hypocrite.

Sora chuckled darkly. "No wonder he waited so long. Sync, then Ion, then Karol, then Florian..."

Axel nodded. "Exactly. So please don't be pissed at us. Or if you have to be pissed, be pissed at me, but not him."

"You didn't do anything wrong," Sora said softly. "It wasn't your job."

"Well, maybe I should've asked you first," Axel said. He suddenly felt compelled to find some reason to take the blame. "You know, like... 'Hey, I think your other half is really hot, mind if I feel him up on the couch?'"

Sora snickered. "That would have been a little weird..." Not nearly as weird as this had been, though, obviously. Maybe Axel had a point.

"I think this whole thing is gonna be a little weird," Axel said, making a sort of circular motion with his finger as though there were actually three physical people there to indicate. "It's already weird. Do you know what it's like seeing my boyfriend but having it be you? I've been worried I'd give you some kind of look and you'd think I was trying to get in your pants."

"I... sort of wondered," Sora admitted. "If you liked guys, I mean. I figured even if you did you were just joking around with me. It was weird but I didn't think you really meant it."

"Well, I mean it with Roxas," Axel said. "I do. I guess if you're gonna stress, at least don't stress about that. I'm crazy about him, so... you don't have to be protective."

"You're important to him, too," Sora said. He was still speaking very softly. "I knew that much. I thought you were his best friend, and I was happy for him because he'd always just gone along with my friends before."

"So this is gonna be okay, then?"

"Yeah," Sora said. "But if Roxas is going to fall asleep hugging you with no shirt on, we need new habits about switching."

"It's okay," Axel said quickly. "We can just not fall asleep when we're... um. When we're done." He wouldn't have minded having them switch the way they did things, because he did want to be able to have Roxas sleep when he was over, but what if they accidentally slipped into old habits? If he and Sora ever woke up more than shirtless together, Sora would have a coronary. Axel too, maybe.

Sora shook his head. "It's a bad habit, really. We shouldn't ever switch by accident."

"If you think you can do it, I, um, wouldn't mind," Axel admitted.

Sora nodded absently. He pulled the shirt on, finally, and looked around. Axel had picked a pretty spot, anyway. Sora looked at the lights of the town and tried to figure out exactly where they were.

"We're a while away from the back of the hospital," Axel said. "I can walk you back now."

Sora almost offered to switch back. He opened his mouth to say it... and then he wondered, for a moment, if he'd wake up again not knowing where he was. "Thanks." He rolled easily to his feet. "Let's go, then."