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[bleedblack222]

Kind of a random post here...but did Ian ever make you feel inadequate or guilty

Comments

[lamia_adastra]

I think part of his manipulation is making us feel inadequate. He tried it with me and for a long time I was sorta immune to it, but the more I fell for him the stronger the feeling got until I felt like I wasn't good enough. He tried talking me out of going to college, then he talked me out of finishing school. You're not the only one he behaved like this towards. Maybe it makes him feel better or something.

[omoisugoshi]

I had left pretty much everyone in my life of my own volition by the time I met Ian, so he didn't have much fuel, but he found some. My guess is that it's one of the ways he makes himself more appealing. You'll notice pretty fast that he's got problems, but thinking back, you'll think how much worse everyone else was (if he's successful). It seems to be something he does to draw the next girl in; alienate her from those around her. A common trait among abusers. Take her from everything and everyone she knows. I felt a little safer going to meet him because my best friend of many years lived 30 minutes away. I saw her a total of twice in over 8 months because Ian didn't like her and I relied on him for money to go anywhere, seeing as he'd spent all mine.

[whiteteardrop]

Yes, I would feel mostly inadequate. Guilty was over the letter that I sent him before his trip. Do you know the story? I think I put part of it up when I did my story in the very beginning. If not, let me know and I can tell you because for the little bit he said, I had a massive amount of guilt for many days that was unbearable

[kinethra]

He definitely did. When I was first talking to him all he did was make me feel like I was Intelligent and such, and then after he built it up, and got me attached. He started tearing it down.

Every little thing. He definitely alienated me from me family. My sister, who I had gotten along with the best, I no longer wanted her around, because neither did he. I just stayed in my room all the time playing games and talking to him.

I went through the time of thinking I should listen and follow and become everything he said. At this point I had to realize what isn't complete bullshit and what is. So even the change I've made in myself, some comes from him, but I changed it from bad to good.

[tiny_muse]

I noticed it too. I can't disagree with any of the other comments so far; they've got the reasons for doing it and the method of doing it pretty well covered.