First to Leave
Rating: PG
Prompt: #032 - Sunrise
Claim: The Time War
Table: Here
Spoilers: None
Pairing: Koschei/Theta
Summary: Neither of them will change their mind.
Note: Probably a bit pointless. Anyway, it might not seem to have anything to do with my claim before the last line.
He always loves him more in the morning.
-
He leaves the bed and regrets it. He wishes he could stay a little longer, beside him, inside him, with him. He lingers in bed longer than he should.
-
He gets up, dresses in silence so as not to wake him and is gone. They meet again around noon. They talk, they laugh, they are in love. There is a shadow of things said the day before hanging over them. They can ignore it for a while. Minutes. Hours. They don’t want to fight.
-
The days are long.
-
Eventually things will be said. He doesn’t know why Theta keeps bringing it up. It isn’t worth discussing, but it is him who refuses to see reason. That’s what Theta says. Always blaming him. Always insisting on being right.
He isn’t.
-
Koschei knows as well as him that their fight is pointless. Neither of them will give in. It was their similarity that attracted them in the first place - similar in intellect, similar in mind and hearts. Both of them want to change the universe. Theta wants to make it better. Fight injustice. They have the means to do good, he says. They should use them. They have to use them.
-
Morals are so boring.
-
They are highly intelligent, they are advanced and powerful. With them ruling everything, Koschei argues, the universe will be better. They can destroy everyone who could threaten the peace they will bring to all.
It doesn’t work that way, Theta says.
-
Neither of them will change their mind.
-
It started innocent, with a question: Where do you want to go? And Koschei answered, said where he’d go, what he’d do, stupidly, because the right answer would have been so much simpler: Anywhere, if it is with you.
He didn’t say that.
Theta laughed, believing him to be joking when he told about his plans for the universe. Then he stopped.
And Koschei couldn’t - still can’t - see the problem. It’s how it should be. It’s how it has to be.
It’s how it will be.
-
Theta is too naïve, too innocent. He doesn’t see the universe for what it is. He can not survive out there.
-
But he will not accept that he is wrong, and neither will Koschei. Wherever they will go, they can’t go together. And they know it. It’s what makes them so angry, keeps them fighting and yelling. By nightfall they don’t talk to each other anymore, both too angry, too frustrated, and desperate not to acknowledge the truth.
Already their time is ending.
-
The nights are filled with curses and nails and teeth. They don’t speak. Everything has been said during the day to be repeated the next, over and over, until they can leave their world and go and see who was right.
-
But in the morning, when Koschei is woken by the first rays of sunlight, he does not think of all that. He simply holds Theta a little closer for another moment and does not know that soon he will do it for the last time. Theta is still sleeping, peacefully, calm, content and in his arms, and Koschei loves him without fear or anger. The moment is fragile and he never wants to break it but he always does.
-
Ages later these moments will be black and white in the movie theatre of his memory.
-
It was a stupid question that started it all, a stupid answer, a discussion not worth having. If Theta had never asked they would still be happy and Koschei could go on for a little longer without knowing that eventually Theta would chose the lesser species over him.
-
What are the lesser species to a Time Lord but toys in a giant playground?
-
Their last day comes and he doesn’t know. It is Theta who leaves first. Trying to change the world by doing good. Doing good never changed anything.
He leaves in the evening. Without a word.
-
And Koschei makes a bet with him, one Theta shall never know of until it is over. But that day, the day the Doctor realises that he should have never left him the Master will look down on him and laugh, and say: I won. And they will stand in the ruins of the universe, the last of the lesser species cowering at their feet.
It is a simple bet: I’ll prove to you that kindness can never change and shape and devastate the cosmos as much as the desire for power.
-
He never suspects that he will lose.
-
- October 1, 2007
Prompt: #032 - Sunrise
Claim: The Time War
Table: Here
Spoilers: None
Pairing: Koschei/Theta
Summary: Neither of them will change their mind.
Note: Probably a bit pointless. Anyway, it might not seem to have anything to do with my claim before the last line.
He always loves him more in the morning.
-
He leaves the bed and regrets it. He wishes he could stay a little longer, beside him, inside him, with him. He lingers in bed longer than he should.
-
He gets up, dresses in silence so as not to wake him and is gone. They meet again around noon. They talk, they laugh, they are in love. There is a shadow of things said the day before hanging over them. They can ignore it for a while. Minutes. Hours. They don’t want to fight.
-
The days are long.
-
Eventually things will be said. He doesn’t know why Theta keeps bringing it up. It isn’t worth discussing, but it is him who refuses to see reason. That’s what Theta says. Always blaming him. Always insisting on being right.
He isn’t.
-
Koschei knows as well as him that their fight is pointless. Neither of them will give in. It was their similarity that attracted them in the first place - similar in intellect, similar in mind and hearts. Both of them want to change the universe. Theta wants to make it better. Fight injustice. They have the means to do good, he says. They should use them. They have to use them.
-
Morals are so boring.
-
They are highly intelligent, they are advanced and powerful. With them ruling everything, Koschei argues, the universe will be better. They can destroy everyone who could threaten the peace they will bring to all.
It doesn’t work that way, Theta says.
-
Neither of them will change their mind.
-
It started innocent, with a question: Where do you want to go? And Koschei answered, said where he’d go, what he’d do, stupidly, because the right answer would have been so much simpler: Anywhere, if it is with you.
He didn’t say that.
Theta laughed, believing him to be joking when he told about his plans for the universe. Then he stopped.
And Koschei couldn’t - still can’t - see the problem. It’s how it should be. It’s how it has to be.
It’s how it will be.
-
Theta is too naïve, too innocent. He doesn’t see the universe for what it is. He can not survive out there.
-
But he will not accept that he is wrong, and neither will Koschei. Wherever they will go, they can’t go together. And they know it. It’s what makes them so angry, keeps them fighting and yelling. By nightfall they don’t talk to each other anymore, both too angry, too frustrated, and desperate not to acknowledge the truth.
Already their time is ending.
-
The nights are filled with curses and nails and teeth. They don’t speak. Everything has been said during the day to be repeated the next, over and over, until they can leave their world and go and see who was right.
-
But in the morning, when Koschei is woken by the first rays of sunlight, he does not think of all that. He simply holds Theta a little closer for another moment and does not know that soon he will do it for the last time. Theta is still sleeping, peacefully, calm, content and in his arms, and Koschei loves him without fear or anger. The moment is fragile and he never wants to break it but he always does.
-
Ages later these moments will be black and white in the movie theatre of his memory.
-
It was a stupid question that started it all, a stupid answer, a discussion not worth having. If Theta had never asked they would still be happy and Koschei could go on for a little longer without knowing that eventually Theta would chose the lesser species over him.
-
What are the lesser species to a Time Lord but toys in a giant playground?
-
Their last day comes and he doesn’t know. It is Theta who leaves first. Trying to change the world by doing good. Doing good never changed anything.
He leaves in the evening. Without a word.
-
And Koschei makes a bet with him, one Theta shall never know of until it is over. But that day, the day the Doctor realises that he should have never left him the Master will look down on him and laugh, and say: I won. And they will stand in the ruins of the universe, the last of the lesser species cowering at their feet.
It is a simple bet: I’ll prove to you that kindness can never change and shape and devastate the cosmos as much as the desire for power.
-
He never suspects that he will lose.
-
- October 1, 2007