some of my favorite Futurama quotes [Season 1]
[Amy attempts repeatedly to retrieve the keys to the ship out of the crane-pick-up machine]
Bender: Come on! It is just like making love. You know, left, down, rotate 62 degrees, engage rotor...
Amy: I know how to make love!
Bender: Of all the friends I've had… you're the first.
Kif: Shall I fire on them now, sir?
Zapp Brannigan: Not yet, Kif. In the game of chess, you can never let your adversary see your pieces.
- - -
Zap Brannigan: Want the rest of the shampagan?
Leela: It's pronounced champagne.
[Fry starts playing an audio tape recording of Sir Mix-a-Lot's "Baby Got Back."]
Leela: Fry, you can't just sit here in the dark listening to classical music.
Fry: I could if you hadn't turned on the light and shut off my stereo.
Fry: That's the saltiest thing I've ever eaten…and I once ate a big heaping bowl of salt!
Bender: There was nothing wrong with that food! The salt content was 10% less than a lethal dose!
Dr. Zoidberg: Uh oh. I shouldn't have had seconds.
- - -
Fry: It's just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns and also he got a racecar. Is any of this getting through to you?
[After watching an online movie on the solution to the garbage problem in New York.]
Fry: Wow, you got that off the Internet? In my day, the Internet was only used to download pornography.
Professor Farnsworth: Actually, that's still true.
[In the movie]
Female Scientist: Now that the, uh, garbage ball is in space, Doctor, perhaps you can help me with my sexual inhibitions?
Male Scientist: With gusto.
- - -
Mayor Poopenmeyer: I now award you with the Academy Prize, which was confiscated from Dr. Wernstrom after it became apparent that he was a jackass.
- - -
Fry: Hey, just as long as you don't make me smell Uranus. [Laughs]
Leela: I don't get it.
Professor Farnsworth: Sorry, Fry, but astronomers renamed Uranus in 2620 to end that stupid joke once and for all.
Fry: Oh. What's it called now?
Professor Farnsworth: Urrectum.
Fry: Do you know how to play the fiddle?
Leela: No, but I used to play the drums. They're sorta similar.
Professor Farnsworth: But what about your super intelligence?
Gunther: When I had that, it was too much pressure to use it. All I want out of life is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit. Thats why I've decided to transfer to business school.
Professor Farnsworth: Noooooooo!
Zapp Brannigan: When I'm in command, every mission's a suicide mission!
- - -
Zapp Brannigan: If we can hit that bull's-eye, the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate!
Leela: Hey, what's behind that door?
Glermo: Nothing.
Leela: Is it the secret ingredient?
Grunka Lunkas: Grunka Lunka dunkity dingredient, you should not ask about the secret ingredient.
Bender: Okay, okay! We get the point!
Leela: I was just curious because of the armed guards…
Grunka Lunkas: Grunka Lunka dunkity darmed guards-
Bender: Shut the hell up!
source: Wikiquote
Bender: Come on! It is just like making love. You know, left, down, rotate 62 degrees, engage rotor...
Amy: I know how to make love!
Bender: Of all the friends I've had… you're the first.
Kif: Shall I fire on them now, sir?
Zapp Brannigan: Not yet, Kif. In the game of chess, you can never let your adversary see your pieces.
- - -
Zap Brannigan: Want the rest of the shampagan?
Leela: It's pronounced champagne.
[Fry starts playing an audio tape recording of Sir Mix-a-Lot's "Baby Got Back."]
Leela: Fry, you can't just sit here in the dark listening to classical music.
Fry: I could if you hadn't turned on the light and shut off my stereo.
Fry: That's the saltiest thing I've ever eaten…and I once ate a big heaping bowl of salt!
Bender: There was nothing wrong with that food! The salt content was 10% less than a lethal dose!
Dr. Zoidberg: Uh oh. I shouldn't have had seconds.
- - -
Fry: It's just like the story of the grasshopper and the octopus. All year long, the grasshopper kept burying acorns for winter, while the octopus mooched off his girlfriend and watched TV. But then the winter came, and the grasshopper died, and the octopus ate all his acorns and also he got a racecar. Is any of this getting through to you?
[After watching an online movie on the solution to the garbage problem in New York.]
Fry: Wow, you got that off the Internet? In my day, the Internet was only used to download pornography.
Professor Farnsworth: Actually, that's still true.
[In the movie]
Female Scientist: Now that the, uh, garbage ball is in space, Doctor, perhaps you can help me with my sexual inhibitions?
Male Scientist: With gusto.
- - -
Mayor Poopenmeyer: I now award you with the Academy Prize, which was confiscated from Dr. Wernstrom after it became apparent that he was a jackass.
- - -
Fry: Hey, just as long as you don't make me smell Uranus. [Laughs]
Leela: I don't get it.
Professor Farnsworth: Sorry, Fry, but astronomers renamed Uranus in 2620 to end that stupid joke once and for all.
Fry: Oh. What's it called now?
Professor Farnsworth: Urrectum.
Fry: Do you know how to play the fiddle?
Leela: No, but I used to play the drums. They're sorta similar.
Professor Farnsworth: But what about your super intelligence?
Gunther: When I had that, it was too much pressure to use it. All I want out of life is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit. Thats why I've decided to transfer to business school.
Professor Farnsworth: Noooooooo!
Zapp Brannigan: When I'm in command, every mission's a suicide mission!
- - -
Zapp Brannigan: If we can hit that bull's-eye, the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate!
Leela: Hey, what's behind that door?
Glermo: Nothing.
Leela: Is it the secret ingredient?
Grunka Lunkas: Grunka Lunka dunkity dingredient, you should not ask about the secret ingredient.
Bender: Okay, okay! We get the point!
Leela: I was just curious because of the armed guards…
Grunka Lunkas: Grunka Lunka dunkity darmed guards-
Bender: Shut the hell up!
source: Wikiquote