a long one

[vaultingschizo]

I think i might actually like who i am now. i realized i dont give a fuck about what people think about me. i realized i have a natural high from life and always am happy simply by choosing to be. i now know i am more enlightened then a majority of the people i know, thankfully i rarely hang out with people i know. i realized i chose this life and

Comments

[kriscoll]

I am proud of you josh, and you are a great friend :-) you definitely deserve someone who makes you this happy and to be this happy!!! <33

[vaultingschizo]

lol thanks. i wouldnt necessasarily consider myself a great friend but the compliment made me smile. i also know for a fact Brie is way out of my league, and she deserves better than me, so i thank God for everyday i have with her

[teen_waste]

first off, COOL. ^^

second off, so the other bank is fucking closed. sorry that you are ALWAYS working. its like a disease.

and third... this entry made me cry. you can use my name and shit i guess, but please dont make me seem like such a bad person. you dealt your fair share of it, and when it comes down for it, i did a lot of shit for you too and you know it, even if you wont admit it.

and for what its worth. i hope we can talk for real sometime soon, theres a lot i want to say.

[vaultingschizo]

thanks for always being there (to guilt trip me). i am not trying to make u seem like a bad person, i am simply throwing out whats been going on. ps: u always say u did a whole lot for me, name one thing u did? if u read this whole thing u'd notice and maybe even remember that u DID choose weed over me, i was only 2nd best, and u never made any changes for me.
we wont be talking "for real" anytime soon. u had plenty chances to say stuff to me from frosh to senior year and u never took that opportunity. dont expect me to feel any sympathy for u just because u might be having it rough now. like i say: u choose who u want to be, and we choose our own destinies.

[vaultingschizo]

this is kind of boring. i expected more angry responses lol. but whatev, its all good

[teen_waste]

im not angry josh, im just fucking sad. that you wont even give me the decency to hear me out, after we have been best friends for like years, it just doesnt seem to fit. im not trying to guilt trip you, make your relationship with brie change, or anything. i just miss having you around and if you dont feel even a twinge or remorse, if you dont have any of that going on at all, then i guess the guy i spent 3 years with never truly existed.

[vaultingschizo]

u start acting like someone who wants to hang out with me, make a few changes, be the kind of person who doesnt make me feel like shit, then i will hear u out. at this point u havent offered me a single reason to be ur friend again. we argued night and day and now ur worse then u were before. what makes u think i want to go to that?

[vaultingschizo]

im not trying to argue.... can we just talk about this in person sometime? thats all im really asking for here.

no stings attatched, i mean, its just a talk. when was this ever a problem for us before?

[youkilledfranky]

did you really have to write that huge thing about kate? I mean honestly, everybody already knows your history, so basicly you did it to hurt her. That's really cruel, and i know your mad at her, but come on now? You shouldn't go out of your way to hurt her, and writing something like that, for everyone to see, is just mean.

And by the way, kate is just fine. Her life isn't "fucked up" and she didn't "ruin it for herself." She's doing fine, and she's an amazing person, you really don't need to try to make her seem like such an awful person.

[vaultingschizo]

if her life isnt fucked up and ruined then tell her to stop bitching about it to me. and actually i did this for the few who are on my case about how "horrible" i treat kate for "no reason". she is not so amazing seeing as how she cant listen (read the last thing she said and the last thing i said). u disapointed me tho. i thought u'd be better than kate and just stay out of my life. and i dont want to hear any bullshit how ur sticking up for ur friend. kate's a big girl now and needs to learn to take care of herself.

[youkilledfranky]

stay out of your life? Because i'm such a disease that brings you such pain whenever i talk to you? Bullshit josh, "out of your life" you know i'm always going to be here. We also know people who know eacother so i'll never be totally out of your life. I am sticking up for her, because i love her, and no matter how old she is, or "how big of a girl" she is, she's still my best friend and when she's getting put down, i'm obviously going to stick up for her. "You disapoint me Ashley" like your my father or something? If i haven't already done that, which, i know i have, because i'm sure a failure to you. Listen Josh, i just didn't think it was really a needed thing to put that in there. I mean you chould just talk to the people, putting it all out in the open is just mean, and you did it to hurt her. Maybe it wasn't your only reason to write the stupid entry, but i know it was one of them, and she doesn't deserve it, so can you please not do anything like it again?

[vaultingschizo]

lol. i did talk to them. but people like u dont give a shit. so here. nobody wants to listen and actually hear the truth (not her version of it) then i am putting that out there in public and in ink so my opinion and the truth is well known. ive told people like u, but ur gunna take her side no matter how wrong she is. this wasnt to put her down. if i wanted to do that i could do so much more and it wouldnt be on the computer. she wants to talk to me face to face i could easily do it then. and since i am such an evil cunt it would be easy for me right? and who do u know that i hang out with? and i doubt even if there is someone, that u will be there with them 24/7 so i cant have a single chance with them without u.

[teen_waste]

gee whiz. if we ever hung out, i WOULDNT argue with you. of course i cant show you that until i get a CHANCE to.

ughhh WHY CANT WE ALL JUST GET ALONG??

seriously? i wanna be drama-less.

[vaultingschizo]

u wouldnt argue with me, true. but once we became buddies again we would. its inevitable. now listen up kate. take the fucking shit out of ur ears and actually listen. lets observe this: we argued in the past because why? u smoked pot, cut urself, drank, etc etc etc. now thats the past. now lets look at the present. ur still doing that shit. so thusly, we would still argue, i would still feel like shit about u, and u have totally not changed one bit since u dumped me last, hurt me last, and i left u.

why cant we all get along? if ur asking that still then u r the dumbest shit in the world. if u cant understand STILL what i have been saying then u have seriously fried ur brains to shit.

want to be drama-less? i have been avoiding u aka avoiding the drama. u keep bugging me. who is creating all this fucking drama?

[teen_waste]

you wouldnt know if i have changed. like i keep saying, i have not been given one chance.

[vaultingschizo]

uve had plenty chances. and actually i do =-P some of ur friends (and urself in ur own live journal) have big mouths and i know all about how u still smoke, and drink. so tuff titty