Comments | vaznetti: FF/SPN: Xinwuwei Docks

vaznetti

FF/SPN: Xinwuwei Docks

Aug 21, 2006 17:03

Blessings against the Thunder
Xinwuwei Docks, 1
by Vanzetti
FF/SPN
John/Zoe

Thanks to musesfool and rez_lo for beta-reading, and to the_grynne for help with Chinese language.

Earlier parts:
Eurydice Settlement
Caieta Port
Xú Landing, 1
Xú Landing, 2

( in which we have a family reunion and the hints of a plot arc )

fanfic, crossovers, blessings_against_thunder

Comments 40

rez_lo August 21 2006, 18:59:51 UTC

Your small tweaks really did sharpen up the picture. (I sort of forgot how small changes can do that, having most recently blundered through a very long beta). This is a really solid pivot, IMO. We get the crossover connection without strain and in a way that underscores the family stories on both sides. I'm really enjoying this.

Speaking of River, did I mention that I loved this in particular? They were going to come for you, but the pretty girl died and you disappeared. Your brother kept you safe. Strange how the simplicity is also ominously echoic or reverberant and also very beautiful. Looking forward to more of your River...

rez_lo August 21 2006, 19:25:05 UTC

(Ack. I missed a typo. there's Simon is saying ...)

vaznetti August 21 2006, 21:30:39 UTC

Not yours -- that was part of a change I made, and I must have left an extra word in. Thanks for catching it!

vaznetti August 21 2006, 21:34:39 UTC

I'm glad you liked that line of River's -- I liked it too, because you can shake it out a bit and it just gets creepier and creepier. And I'm glad the story works with the little revisions.

Will write more, in response to your comments.

phantomas August 21 2006, 19:42:48 UTC

squees like a squeeing thing that squees. Loudly.
I'm loving this. How genially simple, to mesh River and Sam's gift/curse. Love your Dean. :)
Love John's "Eyes, Dean." *laughs*
Dean doesn't yet know that River and Simon are siblings, right?
And Mal, ah, Mal, looking out for his crew/family and for one knowing when to keep his mouth shut *g*

More! More! :D

vaznetti August 21 2006, 21:37:30 UTC

Love John's "Eyes, Dean." *laughs*

Yeah, that's Dean.

Dean doesn't yet know that River and Simon are siblings, right?

Oh, drat. I thought I'd made that clear to him (and the reader!), but you're right, I hadn't. Well, if he hasn't figured it out yet, he'll know it by morning.

I'm so glad you're enjoying this! Yay for Dean and Sam, I feel.

phantomas August 21 2006, 22:08:27 UTC

I think that what made me doubt Dean knew was Zoe introducing Simon and River by their first names only, as if she wanted to hide their being related...I possibly overinterpreted?

Yay for you! and this crossover! me says.
And for more John/Zoe sex, too.
Because..uh..yes :D

phantomas August 21 2006, 22:15:38 UTC

Zoe, trailing a little behind, wonders if they know that they've matched their steps, how they keep close without actually touching.

forgot to tell you how beautiful this line is, how much it says (about Zoe, how observant she is, and of course about father and son) without actually 'saying it', without spelling it out, like, uhm, lesser writers would ;)

vaznetti August 22 2006, 08:11:49 UTC

Oh, I'm pleased that you liked that detail!

I don't think that Dean can stay mad at John for long, once they're actually spending time together. Even though John is an infuriating person.

phantomas August 22 2006, 08:39:59 UTC

I like when they are mad at each other, because, as you say, you can see i's not gonna last long at all, and they both know it, imo, lol

Oh, see? you get John *g*

vaznetti August 22 2006, 09:31:54 UTC

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. To know him is to want to beat him to death with a blunt instrument.

the_grynne August 21 2006, 22:38:15 UTC

Simon-Dean and River-Sam! I don't even watch SPN and I'm gleeing all over this. Hee.

"Not sure I recall. Blue something -- Blue Star, maybe?"

Bit out of touch there, Dean? *smirk*

vaznetti August 22 2006, 08:12:40 UTC

Bit out of touch there, Dean? *smirk*

Dean has a kind of tight focus -- there are things he pays attention to, and then there's everything else. Including major corporations.

ellipsisblack August 22 2006, 10:10:16 UTC

"Metaphor, Dean," Sam says.

:D :D I just love the whole exchange around this. Dean wanting to KILL STUFF MAN and Sam being all I AM A GEEK and Dean all, STFU YOU ARE MY BITCH. :D Yes, I read subtext. Haha.

Still loving your Firefly/Supernatural 'verse to a really dysfunctional degree.

vaznetti August 22 2006, 12:45:58 UTC

I love the way you've translated that conversation between Dean and Sam, because basically, yes. That's exactly what they're saying.

So glad you're still enjoying this!