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i feel so blue tonight even after having a great week and weekend with her. why? why? why? tonight she wants to stay alone on her couch she says, maybe visit her ex-boyfriend for giving him some money for a concert they will attend next week. well, i could come along with she said but doesn't it occur to her that it would feel weird for me, since
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x e xe
it was my thoughts 4 years ago
when I went out of system that drained me emotionally
and 3 years I was loyal to this mantra
but
xe xe
there is always this but comming at the end
now I am at this apartment
with person that tell me stories about polyamoria
and tell me systematically about his lack of ability to
be loyal to one person
and show me how much relationship is just a crap for weak ppl
and I stuck again
and I reject good ppl
ppl who are much caring worth and capable
and I am here
and I know I am waiting my time and feelings
and I know there is no way to change another person
why?
Coz there is hope baby
and there is smth about ambitions of coz
we need this high level of adrenalin in blood
otherwise the game is not worth this
otherwise its like compromise
and compromise is painful shit
sounds familiar?
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