Comments | velellavelella: Normal

velellavelella

Normal

Feb 23, 2007 20:36

I'd like to know how people would treat me if I was able to act normal ( Read more... )

Comments 7

snarkyshark2 February 24 2007, 08:18:00 UTC

Your co-workers are probably lame.

velellavelella February 24 2007, 22:31:52 UTC

I'm trying to refrain from evaluating them right away - and I know Bobby and her boyfriend will probably go bowling with us when you visit. I think they also play a wicked game of air hockey. And I think that at least a few of them seem receptive to friendship.

I guess I just know I'm quirky and I want the ability to control it in certain situations -
I'm curious what normal would be. I don't necessarily want to be normal, I just want to know what it would be like....

Probably impossible....

I'm looking forward to your visit!

snarkyshark2 February 24 2007, 23:35:01 UTC

Well, to put it simply, normal = boring, and I WILL CRUSH THEM AT AIR HOCKEY!

To thine own quirky self be true! lightling February 24 2007, 18:37:59 UTC

I think you should let your quirky self shine through. You will attract those who like that aspect of you. And the others... who cares? Don't stress so much on how you should behave.

For a while it's just been Garrett and me together, and I really just get to be myself around him. So I find socializing much harder after falling into old patterns.

Maybe you should try going out more? Force yourself to go out and meet new people - even if you just go to a coffee shop or a park or anywhere there's a group of people... socializing will become easier and easier over time (trust me, habituation works!). Plus, you might meet some great people!

I know people at my new job are trying to figure me out, and well, it's hard.Help them figure you out. If you know that you are being confusing, explain yourself (this is different than justifying yourself). Humor is a good way to do this... "I'm kind of an odd bird when it comes to the way I...." If you make an effort, chances are, they will too ( ... )

Re: To thine own quirky self be true! velellavelella February 24 2007, 22:49:01 UTC

Thanks, I'm not sure that I could hide the quirky if I tried. But I feel like I'm back in high school with this group...popularity doesn't matter to me, I just don't want any metaphorical swirllies. I became a little more nervous when I called in to find out when I would work next and the girl who checked (I think K ) gave me the wrong date. And then never owned up to it. Because she didn't say her name when I called on the phone, I couldn't be certain it was her, and told my boss - B, her boyfriend, I was not sure who I talked to. I also had to talk to the big boss about it. Bleh....I made a point not to apologize. The work dynamics are so difficult there. And really, Bb and H say no one really cares if they are late, and it has always been mass chaos. I am no longer bothered by it, but it does make me wonder what happened. I even talked to B the day he made the schedule, and he told me he'd let me know if he put me on extra days.

I love getting to know people. This part of the job has been fun for me.

_elle_ February 26 2007, 07:36:31 UTC

It's all trial and error. I think your type, like mine, takes a while to warm up to people. Some people are always the same, no matter where they are or who they are with. I wish I could be like that. I get better at being like that... and you will too:)

Friendships are tricky in the sense that there is alot more that goes into them than people realize... chemistry for one. It takes time to bond.

When I have these types of questions, I ask myself, if I had more 'self-esteem' or 'confidence' etc, would I still feel this way?

I want to be friends with the type of person that is honest, likes themselves, works on themselves (growing) and has a good sense of humor.

burntbythesun02 March 14 2007, 12:46:10 UTC

I often wonder the same thing. I can tell you a couple of things I tried that weren't that helpful: 1) The Landmark Forum (too hard to explain, but kind of like a psychological checkup and self-assessment weekend); 2) Career Coaching (although that may be a function of the coach). The latter interviewed a few friends and mostly told me stuff I already knew (e.g., that I was very fair, but I need to consider other people's feelings more often). But you could try one that would meet with you in person more often and give you feedback on your body language and mannerisms. If you find one that works, let me know. They charge a lot per hour, but more is not necessarily better ( ... )