Oh...Wow. I just read that three times. It was delicious, in a sinful way, like eating a whole red velvet cake (and then screwing the calories away?). The language you used was absolutely brilliant - he wasn't mad, he was offended especially, but there were several other times were you really emphasized the nuances of certain words to convey the contrasts between Richard-Clare, Clare-Jack, Jack-Richard. It was truly brilliant and incredibly clever. I'm a sucker for great wordplay.
They went home that night and as she lay beside him in their white bed. It’s a bed she made and she feels the need to remind herself of this fact. Without exaggeration, that is one of my favorite lines in a story, ever. I can't even fully explain it, but after the description of their time in the Louvre and such, and the whole rest of the story, it just...it just floored me. So brilliant, so true to life.
This was a beautiful, beautiful piece of work. Thank you so much for sharing it, it was wonderful and I'll definitely be coming back to reread.
Ah, thank you, I am immensely flattered that you liked it and managed to grasp everything that I was putting out there.. Wordplay is something I strive to acheive but this piece was easier than most. (That line is one of my personal favourites as well)
(*grins* You got my prompt! It would be a lie to say I didn't emit a slightly excited squeak when I saw that. :) Anyway. I'll actually read it now!)
Like this? Any words I can currently think of are an understatement; that one most of all.
This was...so, so far beyond anything I had imagined when I submitted my prompt. It was delicious and had just the right touches of everything. I apologize for the lack of any real "constructive praise," but I'm simply too overwhelmed.
I do most definitely second what kateinslacks said, though. I'm a huge sucker for word play, and you are a genius at it.
I'm most definitely memming this, and I honestly think I might print it out so I can read it any time I like.
Reading your work feels like falling. The adrenalin rush of seduction, the sweet fear of suspecting what's at the end, but never being certain when it's going to come, and not to mention the wind on your face feeling created by the glimpses into the characters' past.
It's all the joy of flying but without the pressure of having to go somewhere instead of seeing where the end finds you.
I have no idea if any of this made sense, but you left me slightly in awe.
“I thought you wanted to be Goya,” he whispers in her ear, leaning under the pretext of pouring her a drink, “Not Bovary.”
This line made me adore you more than I have any right to. You get extra points for inspiration by T.S. Elliot.
Thank you so much- this is possibly one of the best comment's I've ever gotten on my work.I'm delighted that you liked it - and that you picked up on the nod to Eliot, who is as you know my favorite poet.
This is so, so elegant. There is a certain timeless and old-time glamour attached to the entire story - so much so that I actually said "oh" when you mentioned something like Magnolia bakery and realized that this is present-day. That's a good thing; I like that you are able to tie the Old World with the New in such an effective manner.
Well done, my dear! You paint quite the evocative picture.
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They went home that night and as she lay beside him in their white bed. It’s a bed she made and she feels the need to remind herself of this fact. Without exaggeration, that is one of my favorite lines in a story, ever. I can't even fully explain it, but after the description of their time in the Louvre and such, and the whole rest of the story, it just...it just floored me. So brilliant, so true to life.
This was a beautiful, beautiful piece of work. Thank you so much for sharing it, it was wonderful and I'll definitely be coming back to reread.
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Reread? You're too kind.
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Thank you , so much! I'm tentaive with scenes like that I don't want them to fall flat so I'm delighted that it worked for you.
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Like this? Any words I can currently think of are an understatement; that one most of all.
This was...so, so far beyond anything I had imagined when I submitted my prompt. It was delicious and had just the right touches of everything. I apologize for the lack of any real "constructive praise," but I'm simply too overwhelmed.
I do most definitely second what kateinslacks said, though. I'm a huge sucker for word play, and you are a genius at it.
I'm most definitely memming this, and I honestly think I might print it out so I can read it any time I like.
Thank you so much! You're phenomenal. ♥ ♥
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Thank you and I'm glad that the word delicious comes to mind!
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It's all the joy of flying but without the pressure of having to go somewhere instead of seeing where the end finds you.
I have no idea if any of this made sense, but you left me slightly in awe.
“I thought you wanted to be Goya,” he whispers in her ear, leaning under the pretext of pouring her a drink, “Not Bovary.”
This line made me adore you more than I have any right to. You get extra points for inspiration by T.S. Elliot.
Reply
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This is so, so elegant. There is a certain timeless and old-time glamour attached to the entire story - so much so that I actually said "oh" when you mentioned something like Magnolia bakery and realized that this is present-day. That's a good thing; I like that you are able to tie the Old World with the New in such an effective manner.
Well done, my dear! You paint quite the evocative picture.
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Thank you for reading and for letting me know that you liked it. It means so much coming froma person whose work I adore.
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