the jokes i know off the top of my head

[vellum]

a kid asks his dad what the difference is between confident and confidential. the dad answers, "you're my son. of that, i'm confident. your friend timmy is also my son. that's confidential

Comments

[vellum]

\o/ only a year and a half late! not too long...

[aimless_glee]

a jewish guy calls his mom. he says, "mom, how're you doing?" she says, "horrible, i haven't eaten in 32 days." he goes, "why haven't you eaten in 32 days?" she answers, "i didn't want my mouth to be full in case you called."

ELAAAAINE. ♥

[vellum]

? got the joke off of studio 60, but if it made you capslock, i'll go for it.

[aimless_glee]

LOL, sorry!! I guess Sorkin really meant it when he said "Good writers borrow from other writers. Great writers steal from them outright"! :D

This is actually from Nichols and May's most famous sketch Mother & Son. The original line is: "I sat by that phone all day Friday, all day Saturday, and all day Sunday...your father said to me, 'Phyllis, eat something, you'll faint.' I said, 'No, Harry, no, I don't want my mouth to be full when my son calls me.'"

[vellum]

the more i know!

[hinazuke]

MY GOD THESE ARE SO BAD. :D