Ha ha ha OW ha! Well, I'm writing PETS.
That meme did the trick. I'm 1000 words into the next chapter of Pets and going strong.
Those of you whose smut requests I haven't gotten to yet, I have not forgotten them. I'll do them, but you may need to wait a little. In the mean time, here are the "drabbles" I completed.
For dragontrap, Ed/Envy/Roy/Ling, Kink -- Candy Cane
TITLE: May the Best Man Win.
"You are wondering," said Ed, "Why I gathered you all here."
Ling cocked his head and looked over at Roy. Roy smirked and crossed his legs at the knee sitting back. Envy snorted.
"The truth is, you all want me. Admit it."
Ling raised his eyebrows innocently. Roy snorted. Envy muttered, "As if."
"Well," said Ed. "You know what… I'm tired. I'm tired of being constantly chased down and harassed by the three of you. Ling, I'm tired of you mooching off me. You want me to date you, ask me OUT. Mustang, quit raping me with your eyes and get off your ass. You never know until you ask. I might say YES. And Envy. God. Enough with the whole "I hate you" thing. That is just so second grade. You think I'll notice you if you pull my braid? Well I'll notice you a hell of a lot more if you use you put your hands on an erogenous zone. I assume you know what that word means… you are supposed to be a couple of centuries old."
Ed grinned. For once FINALLY the three of them were stunned into silence.
He pushed on, "I'm tired of this whole charade. If you think I'm so darned cute, prove it to me. Right here, right now. Whoever gets me off gets to keep me."
Ling pounced first, taking command of Ed's mouth. Envy followed using those hands to strip the clothes off Ed in a way that was both possessive and slightly uncomfortable.
Roy hung back.
The heck? Ed frowned… He was so sure that Mustang lusted after him. But no, there he sat on the chair watching them with a slight smirk. Then he reached into a voluminous pocket and pulled out a candy cane. Slowly he stripped the plastic wrapper off and in a show of almost casual indifference he put it into his mouth, sliding it in and out with a slow leisurely movement.
Ed found himself ignoring Ling's lips on his nipples and Envy's teeth on his back as Roy sat there, eyes fixed on his, licking the candy cane with an agile pink tongue. Then finally he stood.
"Are you offering me candy," Ed asked, breathlessly. Envy was pushing him down to the floor.
"In a manner of speaking," said Roy.
"What if I don't want to eat it." It was hard to breathe with Ling mouthing his balls and Envy working to detach his automail arm.
Roy knelt down, pushing a way between his rival suitors by sheer presence alone. "I wasn't thinking of having you eat it," Roy said.
Envy tossed the arm aside and crawled after Ed's leg. Ling was preoccupied with Ed's cock.
Ed hissed in when he felt the hard cold and decidedly sticky intrusion. "You can hold it," Roy whispered, "But I plan to eat this myself."
For Kytyngirl2 Roy/Ed/Al Kink = Infantilism.
A/N: I admit it, this isn't proper Infantilism, because the real deal with that kink is too silly and embarassing to take seriously, and not in my mind at all sexy. This is more like humiliation and domination pretending to be infantilism.
TITLE: Whatever it Takes
Al rolled his eyes when the other two weren't looking. He'd put up with a lot for his brother, but this was by far the weirdest thing Ed and his lover had ever asked of him. Yes, he knew he was intruding on their relationship. He was the third wheel in their perfect, if somewhat stormy affair. He was pathetic and lame and odd man out. The truth was that he was willing to do pretty much ANYTHING not to be left in the cold.
Still, three days, three days of this and they still hadn't gotten tired of this game.
Al wailed, because it was what they insisted on doing. He was a little surprised when he was able to actually get tears to form in his eyes. God help him, the two of them wanted that, too.
"I think the baby's hungry," Roy said.
Al was because they hadn't fed him since the night before, and they absolutely ignored him if he used his words. Gesturing was out. They had him firmly tied to his chair to prevent him from using his hands in an "unbabylike" manner. The diaper was by far the most demeaning part of it, but perhaps more than anything else, that's what got Roy off.
Roy, Al decided, was a sick, sick, sick man. But Ed loved him. And if this is what it took to keep Ed, Al could even break with toilet training.
Ed fed him while Roy watched. Al obediently opened his mouth for each bite spoonful of oatmeal. Feeling the spoon caress his cheeks and chin after each pass. Finally Al turned his head to signal he was full. Roy chuckled.
"Take him out of his chair, Ed," Roy directed stroking his crotch. "It's tummy time."
One of these days, Al vowed, he would steal Ed away from Roy. Until then… whatever it took. Whatever it took.
For sky_dark, Roy/Ling/Ed/Al (flesh) Kink = Tattoos.
A/N: Don't know what happened to me here. I failed. I suppose this kind of disappointment happens to everyone.
TITLE: Three Musketeers
"We could be like the three musketeers," Al said enthusiastically.
Ling rolled over onto his stomach, and regarded Al somewhat skeptically. "But there are four of us," he said.
Roy grunted and yawned, "Could you two keep it down, some of us are trying to sleep." He rolled over and grabbed Ed who was truly down for the count in a tight embrace. Ed didn't even move.
"Well, there were four musketeers, too, really," said Al. "But one of them came in later. Like me. I'm so totally D'Artagnan. You'd be Aramis, Roy is Athos, and Ed is Porthos. You all were tight with each other while I was armor and couldn't do anything, but now I'm flesh again, I'm like joining in. All for one and one for all."
"But what does that have to do with getting matching tattoos?" Ling asked.
"Um…." Al paused and reached for a second, getting nothing. "'Because tattoos are cool?" he suggested, lamely.
For Circe67 Envy/Roy Kink = Knife/Bloodplay.
A/N: Whew... an actual PAIRING instead of a foursome, thanks Circe!
TITLE: A Deal's a Deal.
Envy looked down on the captive. Mustang wasn't looking too happy. No not at all. Well, wasn't that just tough luck. It was his own damn fault for being such a blabber mouth. Really, the man should know better than to tell on Wrath. Wasn't descretion and tact something that the military required in its officers?
"Let me go," Roy said. "Let me go and I won't kill you the way I did Lust."
Envy sighed. "You can't kill me the way you did Lust. I'm older and stronger than her. And you are just one weak pathetic man." A notion made his lips quirk up. "Still, I could let you try."
Roy raised an eyebrow.
Envy looked around and found a short metal bar, a piece of scrap from something left discarded in a corner. He tossed to the ragged looking alchemist. "How about this. We fight. If you win, I'll let you go. If I win, you will spread your legs for me - willingly."
"Screw you," Roy said. "I won't do any such thing." But he grabbed the bar and launched himself at Envy nonetheless.
Envy transmuted his right arm into a blade and caught Roy's arm as he passed, True metal skittered against false, striking very real sparks. Envy stepped to the side, then reached out in a smooth movement to grab Roy by his waist with one hand and bring the blade up to his throat.
Roy froze.
"That was too quick," pouted Envy. "But it's ok." He brought the knife down, sliding it between the layers of Roy's uniform, cutting through the thick fabric all the way down to the skin, leaving a trail of blood behind.
Roy's breath hitched in. Envy continued the long cut, down the shirt, through the thick belt, skirting to the side of the zipper and ending up at Roy's crotch. Roy hissed.
"You fought me, Roy. You lost." Envy grinned. "A deal is a deal." Envy touched the blade against Roy's scrotum. "Now spread 'em."
For forgottonlover: Fury/Kimbley/Ling/Russell Kink = Bloodplay and snuff. Fury on top.
A/N -- Way to make this tough on me, FL! But hah, I'm pretty proud I was able to do this. After all these people NEVER meet each other in the Manga or the Anime and their personalities don't exactly lend themselves to a dogpile.
TITLE: Top
Fury slowly blinked his eyes open. He felt a bit woozy and sore. It took a moment to get his bearings. The first thing he saw was the missing prince. Fury's heart skipped with exitement, but then he took in the man's condition…. Naked, blindfolded, and tied up in an elaborate way.
Fury scanned the room and noticed another body, a tall blond man, curled in the corner. Fury wasn't sure who he was. Perhaps once he'd been handsome, but burnmarks and bruises made it difficult to tell. Although he wasn't restrained in any way this blond made no move, lying on his side with dull eyes staring out into nothing.
Fury got the idea that he was in a very bad place. Very very bad indeed.
"So the star of the show has woken up," came a voice behind him. Fury looked up and saw the whipcord lean features of the legendary mad alchemist. Crimson. Kimbley. Fury had never met the man before, in fact he thought that he was dead, executed after the Ishbal war. Clearly that intelligence was wrong.
"What…" was all Fury could get out of his mouth.
"How old are you, soldier?" Crimson asked in a way that seemed almost friendly.
"Eighteen." Fury wondered what his age had to do with anything.
"Wonderful, you'd be at your sexual peak then wouldn't you."
Fury's eyes opened as wide as they could go. He started to shake involuntarily.
"We're going to have a bit of a game here, soldier," Crimson continued. "You see, that dark haired toy is too proud to play along, and Russell, my first pet, well, he's too broken these days. Almost time to put him out to pasture. But you, you look like you might be willing."
"What - game?" Fury gasped out.
"It's called topping. And it's really simple to play. All you have to do is fuck someone until you come. If you win, well, you know, coming is its own reward I think. But to give you a little incentive, should you lose, I think I'll practice my explosives on Russell here. He's really not good for much else anyway."
Crimson stood up and kicked the blond. Russell let out an ooph, and curled into a tighter ball, but otherwise did nothing.
"Top…" said Fury.
Crimson smiled. "First me. Then Ling. Then Russell."
Fury's had never felt less turned on in his life. Being asked to come three times in short succession, under such stressful circumstances, it was impossible.
"I don't think I can."
"Well then… I think I'll start by blowing up Russell's foot."
Crimson showed Fury the alchemical circles on his hands, then leaned down towards the blonds legs.
"I'll do it!" said Fury. He wasn't sure how, but somehow he would. Somehow he'd figure a way to placate this monster long enough to think, long enough to devise a way to escape.
"Excellent." Crimson stood and unbuckled his pants. "Let's get started."
For hallidae, Hughes/Roy/Havoc Kink= cigarettes burning.
A/N, this is actually something of a fandom cliche... the whole Hughes passing a horny emotionally needy Roy off to Havoc. As interpersonal dynamics go, it's utterly absurd -- as if one person could substitute for another this way. But as Smut goes... hey, it has potential.
TITLE: Smoke and Ashes.
Hughes pulled his wedding ring off and tucked it into the pocket of his jacket. Then he patted himself down, long fingers searching for cigarettes that weren't there. Gracia must have found the pack and removed it. Hughes tightened his jaw and looked over at Havoc.
"Could I borrow a cigarette?"
"I thought you gave up smoking," Havoc said sitting stiffly on the corner of the hotel room bed. "When you got married."
Hughes winced. He didn't need another reminder of the more legitamate part of his life. Not right now. But Havoc was young and he wouldn't necessarily understand the convoluted and unhealthy dynamics of his and Roy's and Gracia's relationship.
"Gracia doesn't like the smell of cigarettes," Hughes said. "So I keep it down, but I still occasionally smoke… on special occasions. Roy expects it. He needs it."
Havoc handed him the cigarette but was surprised when Hughes didn't light it. He took out one for himself and reached for his lighter, but Hughes caught his hand. "No."
Havoc frowned. Hughes knew he was confused. Willing, yes, but confused. Havoc would do what was best for the country, and what Amestria needed was Roy relaxed, on his game and ready to pull off his strategic magic… not stressed, tense and distracted. But Hughes just couldn't do it anymore. He had to choose between Roy and Gracia. His heart couldn't take being pulled in opposite directions any longer.
"Havoc," said Hughes. "Next time... it will just be the two of you."
Havoc nodded. "I understand."
The door opened and Roy walked in. He looked exhausted and a bit disheveled. Hughes lifted up the cigarette and Roy smiled, snapping his fingers. The cigarette lit up, and Hughes took a deep drag, then pulled Roy close and kissed him, blowing the smoke from his lungs, and sharing the bitter, vibrant flavor of the nicotine.
Then he pointed Roy at Havoc and watched as Roy repeated the ritual. They undressed in silence. The cigarettes, hardly tasted were left in the ashtray by the bed.
Later, before Roy was done, but past the point where Hughes's vows broken, the eldest of the trio withdrew. Hughes dressed quietly so as not to distract the others, turning his back on the amourous noises. He paused to take one last drag of the cigarette, before snubbing it out and put his wedding band back on finger.
Those of you whose smut requests I haven't gotten to yet, I have not forgotten them. I'll do them, but you may need to wait a little. In the mean time, here are the "drabbles" I completed.
For dragontrap, Ed/Envy/Roy/Ling, Kink -- Candy Cane
TITLE: May the Best Man Win.
"You are wondering," said Ed, "Why I gathered you all here."
Ling cocked his head and looked over at Roy. Roy smirked and crossed his legs at the knee sitting back. Envy snorted.
"The truth is, you all want me. Admit it."
Ling raised his eyebrows innocently. Roy snorted. Envy muttered, "As if."
"Well," said Ed. "You know what… I'm tired. I'm tired of being constantly chased down and harassed by the three of you. Ling, I'm tired of you mooching off me. You want me to date you, ask me OUT. Mustang, quit raping me with your eyes and get off your ass. You never know until you ask. I might say YES. And Envy. God. Enough with the whole "I hate you" thing. That is just so second grade. You think I'll notice you if you pull my braid? Well I'll notice you a hell of a lot more if you use you put your hands on an erogenous zone. I assume you know what that word means… you are supposed to be a couple of centuries old."
Ed grinned. For once FINALLY the three of them were stunned into silence.
He pushed on, "I'm tired of this whole charade. If you think I'm so darned cute, prove it to me. Right here, right now. Whoever gets me off gets to keep me."
Ling pounced first, taking command of Ed's mouth. Envy followed using those hands to strip the clothes off Ed in a way that was both possessive and slightly uncomfortable.
Roy hung back.
The heck? Ed frowned… He was so sure that Mustang lusted after him. But no, there he sat on the chair watching them with a slight smirk. Then he reached into a voluminous pocket and pulled out a candy cane. Slowly he stripped the plastic wrapper off and in a show of almost casual indifference he put it into his mouth, sliding it in and out with a slow leisurely movement.
Ed found himself ignoring Ling's lips on his nipples and Envy's teeth on his back as Roy sat there, eyes fixed on his, licking the candy cane with an agile pink tongue. Then finally he stood.
"Are you offering me candy," Ed asked, breathlessly. Envy was pushing him down to the floor.
"In a manner of speaking," said Roy.
"What if I don't want to eat it." It was hard to breathe with Ling mouthing his balls and Envy working to detach his automail arm.
Roy knelt down, pushing a way between his rival suitors by sheer presence alone. "I wasn't thinking of having you eat it," Roy said.
Envy tossed the arm aside and crawled after Ed's leg. Ling was preoccupied with Ed's cock.
Ed hissed in when he felt the hard cold and decidedly sticky intrusion. "You can hold it," Roy whispered, "But I plan to eat this myself."
For Kytyngirl2 Roy/Ed/Al Kink = Infantilism.
A/N: I admit it, this isn't proper Infantilism, because the real deal with that kink is too silly and embarassing to take seriously, and not in my mind at all sexy. This is more like humiliation and domination pretending to be infantilism.
TITLE: Whatever it Takes
Al rolled his eyes when the other two weren't looking. He'd put up with a lot for his brother, but this was by far the weirdest thing Ed and his lover had ever asked of him. Yes, he knew he was intruding on their relationship. He was the third wheel in their perfect, if somewhat stormy affair. He was pathetic and lame and odd man out. The truth was that he was willing to do pretty much ANYTHING not to be left in the cold.
Still, three days, three days of this and they still hadn't gotten tired of this game.
Al wailed, because it was what they insisted on doing. He was a little surprised when he was able to actually get tears to form in his eyes. God help him, the two of them wanted that, too.
"I think the baby's hungry," Roy said.
Al was because they hadn't fed him since the night before, and they absolutely ignored him if he used his words. Gesturing was out. They had him firmly tied to his chair to prevent him from using his hands in an "unbabylike" manner. The diaper was by far the most demeaning part of it, but perhaps more than anything else, that's what got Roy off.
Roy, Al decided, was a sick, sick, sick man. But Ed loved him. And if this is what it took to keep Ed, Al could even break with toilet training.
Ed fed him while Roy watched. Al obediently opened his mouth for each bite spoonful of oatmeal. Feeling the spoon caress his cheeks and chin after each pass. Finally Al turned his head to signal he was full. Roy chuckled.
"Take him out of his chair, Ed," Roy directed stroking his crotch. "It's tummy time."
One of these days, Al vowed, he would steal Ed away from Roy. Until then… whatever it took. Whatever it took.
For sky_dark, Roy/Ling/Ed/Al (flesh) Kink = Tattoos.
A/N: Don't know what happened to me here. I failed. I suppose this kind of disappointment happens to everyone.
TITLE: Three Musketeers
"We could be like the three musketeers," Al said enthusiastically.
Ling rolled over onto his stomach, and regarded Al somewhat skeptically. "But there are four of us," he said.
Roy grunted and yawned, "Could you two keep it down, some of us are trying to sleep." He rolled over and grabbed Ed who was truly down for the count in a tight embrace. Ed didn't even move.
"Well, there were four musketeers, too, really," said Al. "But one of them came in later. Like me. I'm so totally D'Artagnan. You'd be Aramis, Roy is Athos, and Ed is Porthos. You all were tight with each other while I was armor and couldn't do anything, but now I'm flesh again, I'm like joining in. All for one and one for all."
"But what does that have to do with getting matching tattoos?" Ling asked.
"Um…." Al paused and reached for a second, getting nothing. "'Because tattoos are cool?" he suggested, lamely.
For Circe67 Envy/Roy Kink = Knife/Bloodplay.
A/N: Whew... an actual PAIRING instead of a foursome, thanks Circe!
TITLE: A Deal's a Deal.
Envy looked down on the captive. Mustang wasn't looking too happy. No not at all. Well, wasn't that just tough luck. It was his own damn fault for being such a blabber mouth. Really, the man should know better than to tell on Wrath. Wasn't descretion and tact something that the military required in its officers?
"Let me go," Roy said. "Let me go and I won't kill you the way I did Lust."
Envy sighed. "You can't kill me the way you did Lust. I'm older and stronger than her. And you are just one weak pathetic man." A notion made his lips quirk up. "Still, I could let you try."
Roy raised an eyebrow.
Envy looked around and found a short metal bar, a piece of scrap from something left discarded in a corner. He tossed to the ragged looking alchemist. "How about this. We fight. If you win, I'll let you go. If I win, you will spread your legs for me - willingly."
"Screw you," Roy said. "I won't do any such thing." But he grabbed the bar and launched himself at Envy nonetheless.
Envy transmuted his right arm into a blade and caught Roy's arm as he passed, True metal skittered against false, striking very real sparks. Envy stepped to the side, then reached out in a smooth movement to grab Roy by his waist with one hand and bring the blade up to his throat.
Roy froze.
"That was too quick," pouted Envy. "But it's ok." He brought the knife down, sliding it between the layers of Roy's uniform, cutting through the thick fabric all the way down to the skin, leaving a trail of blood behind.
Roy's breath hitched in. Envy continued the long cut, down the shirt, through the thick belt, skirting to the side of the zipper and ending up at Roy's crotch. Roy hissed.
"You fought me, Roy. You lost." Envy grinned. "A deal is a deal." Envy touched the blade against Roy's scrotum. "Now spread 'em."
For forgottonlover: Fury/Kimbley/Ling/Russell Kink = Bloodplay and snuff. Fury on top.
A/N -- Way to make this tough on me, FL! But hah, I'm pretty proud I was able to do this. After all these people NEVER meet each other in the Manga or the Anime and their personalities don't exactly lend themselves to a dogpile.
TITLE: Top
Fury slowly blinked his eyes open. He felt a bit woozy and sore. It took a moment to get his bearings. The first thing he saw was the missing prince. Fury's heart skipped with exitement, but then he took in the man's condition…. Naked, blindfolded, and tied up in an elaborate way.
Fury scanned the room and noticed another body, a tall blond man, curled in the corner. Fury wasn't sure who he was. Perhaps once he'd been handsome, but burnmarks and bruises made it difficult to tell. Although he wasn't restrained in any way this blond made no move, lying on his side with dull eyes staring out into nothing.
Fury got the idea that he was in a very bad place. Very very bad indeed.
"So the star of the show has woken up," came a voice behind him. Fury looked up and saw the whipcord lean features of the legendary mad alchemist. Crimson. Kimbley. Fury had never met the man before, in fact he thought that he was dead, executed after the Ishbal war. Clearly that intelligence was wrong.
"What…" was all Fury could get out of his mouth.
"How old are you, soldier?" Crimson asked in a way that seemed almost friendly.
"Eighteen." Fury wondered what his age had to do with anything.
"Wonderful, you'd be at your sexual peak then wouldn't you."
Fury's eyes opened as wide as they could go. He started to shake involuntarily.
"We're going to have a bit of a game here, soldier," Crimson continued. "You see, that dark haired toy is too proud to play along, and Russell, my first pet, well, he's too broken these days. Almost time to put him out to pasture. But you, you look like you might be willing."
"What - game?" Fury gasped out.
"It's called topping. And it's really simple to play. All you have to do is fuck someone until you come. If you win, well, you know, coming is its own reward I think. But to give you a little incentive, should you lose, I think I'll practice my explosives on Russell here. He's really not good for much else anyway."
Crimson stood up and kicked the blond. Russell let out an ooph, and curled into a tighter ball, but otherwise did nothing.
"Top…" said Fury.
Crimson smiled. "First me. Then Ling. Then Russell."
Fury's had never felt less turned on in his life. Being asked to come three times in short succession, under such stressful circumstances, it was impossible.
"I don't think I can."
"Well then… I think I'll start by blowing up Russell's foot."
Crimson showed Fury the alchemical circles on his hands, then leaned down towards the blonds legs.
"I'll do it!" said Fury. He wasn't sure how, but somehow he would. Somehow he'd figure a way to placate this monster long enough to think, long enough to devise a way to escape.
"Excellent." Crimson stood and unbuckled his pants. "Let's get started."
For hallidae, Hughes/Roy/Havoc Kink= cigarettes burning.
A/N, this is actually something of a fandom cliche... the whole Hughes passing a horny emotionally needy Roy off to Havoc. As interpersonal dynamics go, it's utterly absurd -- as if one person could substitute for another this way. But as Smut goes... hey, it has potential.
TITLE: Smoke and Ashes.
Hughes pulled his wedding ring off and tucked it into the pocket of his jacket. Then he patted himself down, long fingers searching for cigarettes that weren't there. Gracia must have found the pack and removed it. Hughes tightened his jaw and looked over at Havoc.
"Could I borrow a cigarette?"
"I thought you gave up smoking," Havoc said sitting stiffly on the corner of the hotel room bed. "When you got married."
Hughes winced. He didn't need another reminder of the more legitamate part of his life. Not right now. But Havoc was young and he wouldn't necessarily understand the convoluted and unhealthy dynamics of his and Roy's and Gracia's relationship.
"Gracia doesn't like the smell of cigarettes," Hughes said. "So I keep it down, but I still occasionally smoke… on special occasions. Roy expects it. He needs it."
Havoc handed him the cigarette but was surprised when Hughes didn't light it. He took out one for himself and reached for his lighter, but Hughes caught his hand. "No."
Havoc frowned. Hughes knew he was confused. Willing, yes, but confused. Havoc would do what was best for the country, and what Amestria needed was Roy relaxed, on his game and ready to pull off his strategic magic… not stressed, tense and distracted. But Hughes just couldn't do it anymore. He had to choose between Roy and Gracia. His heart couldn't take being pulled in opposite directions any longer.
"Havoc," said Hughes. "Next time... it will just be the two of you."
Havoc nodded. "I understand."
The door opened and Roy walked in. He looked exhausted and a bit disheveled. Hughes lifted up the cigarette and Roy smiled, snapping his fingers. The cigarette lit up, and Hughes took a deep drag, then pulled Roy close and kissed him, blowing the smoke from his lungs, and sharing the bitter, vibrant flavor of the nicotine.
Then he pointed Roy at Havoc and watched as Roy repeated the ritual. They undressed in silence. The cigarettes, hardly tasted were left in the ashtray by the bed.
Later, before Roy was done, but past the point where Hughes's vows broken, the eldest of the trio withdrew. Hughes dressed quietly so as not to distract the others, turning his back on the amourous noises. He paused to take one last drag of the cigarette, before snubbing it out and put his wedding band back on finger.