My first HP fic.
TITLE: It's Just Her Nature...
FANDOM: Harry Potter
PAIRING: McGonagall + Hagrid, implied Harry x the rest of his Quidditch team.
WARNING: Um... wrongness? Godawfulness? Worksafe but not Brainsafe.
RATING: Strangely enough, PG.
CHALLENGE THAT INSPIRED THIS: Harry/oviposition/orgy -- blame Haec Teris, not me.
"But," said Hagrid with a frown, "She couldn't help it." He curled one hand over the oversized insect's head in a tender caress. "She's a Siren Cicada -- It's her nature to deposit her eggs in other creatures. She didn't mean any harm by it, did you sweet-ums? And in any case now that she's laid them, she's not long for this world. She'll never do it again."
The six foot tall cicada began singing again, a noise that reminded McGonagall of violins. For a moment she closed her eyes and just listened to its alluringly sensual sound. She remembered tender moments with her husband when she was young…. And this must be how the rascally creature had lured Gryffindor's entire Quidditch team into decidedly adult activity.
McGonagall blushed slightly and coughed. "That's doesn't change the fact that Madam Pomfrey had to dig that creatures eggs out of seven students, and three of them needed emergency contraceptive potions. Harry was so upset and distracted by his behavior that he actually walked into a wall in my office. Really, I thought you were close to him, how could you let such a thing happen?"
Hagrid slouched down. "The kids are all right now, aren't they?"
"They'll be in class tomorrow." She stood up to leave Hagrid's shack. "Please keep better track of your animals, Hagrid. This school has already taken enough of a hit to its reputation, what with the murders, curses and petrifications. The ministry is not going to be happy about hearing that wild student orgies have occurred here as well."
Hagrid nodded, his eyes downcast. He patted the insect's head. It sang back happily, oblivious to the trouble it had caused. "I'll keep my animals in order, don't you worry." He opened his mouth one more time, but then shut it with a sigh. Now was probably not the time to mention the rest of the Siren Cicada colony coming to maturity out in the woods… somewhere.
FANDOM: Harry Potter
PAIRING: McGonagall + Hagrid, implied Harry x the rest of his Quidditch team.
WARNING: Um... wrongness? Godawfulness? Worksafe but not Brainsafe.
RATING: Strangely enough, PG.
CHALLENGE THAT INSPIRED THIS: Harry/oviposition/orgy -- blame Haec Teris, not me.
"But," said Hagrid with a frown, "She couldn't help it." He curled one hand over the oversized insect's head in a tender caress. "She's a Siren Cicada -- It's her nature to deposit her eggs in other creatures. She didn't mean any harm by it, did you sweet-ums? And in any case now that she's laid them, she's not long for this world. She'll never do it again."
The six foot tall cicada began singing again, a noise that reminded McGonagall of violins. For a moment she closed her eyes and just listened to its alluringly sensual sound. She remembered tender moments with her husband when she was young…. And this must be how the rascally creature had lured Gryffindor's entire Quidditch team into decidedly adult activity.
McGonagall blushed slightly and coughed. "That's doesn't change the fact that Madam Pomfrey had to dig that creatures eggs out of seven students, and three of them needed emergency contraceptive potions. Harry was so upset and distracted by his behavior that he actually walked into a wall in my office. Really, I thought you were close to him, how could you let such a thing happen?"
Hagrid slouched down. "The kids are all right now, aren't they?"
"They'll be in class tomorrow." She stood up to leave Hagrid's shack. "Please keep better track of your animals, Hagrid. This school has already taken enough of a hit to its reputation, what with the murders, curses and petrifications. The ministry is not going to be happy about hearing that wild student orgies have occurred here as well."
Hagrid nodded, his eyes downcast. He patted the insect's head. It sang back happily, oblivious to the trouble it had caused. "I'll keep my animals in order, don't you worry." He opened his mouth one more time, but then shut it with a sigh. Now was probably not the time to mention the rest of the Siren Cicada colony coming to maturity out in the woods… somewhere.