Fic: Searching For... ... - Chapter 8B
Title: Searching for... ... - Chapter 8B
Author: vic_sim
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone, anything, except for the plot.
Characters: Super Junior + Henry, Zhou Mi, DBSK
Category: General
Rating: PG-13
Archive
Zhou Mi could not stop the gasp from escaping, his hand reaching over to comfort his hyung, only to have Sungmin pull his hands back. Zhou Mi looked at Sungmin with pain-filled eyes and guilt for not being there. Sungmin blinked, looking away. Even though it occurred almost 3 years ago, the memories were still fresh in his mind.
“Sungmin…”
Zhou Mi stood up, walking round the table. He sat next to Sungmin, pulling the smaller man into his arms. He knew that the rest of the conversation was not to be held here. Zhou Mi felt Sungmin’s hands grabbed onto his shirt, twisting the cloth. Zhou Mi looked up at the ceiling, refusing to let the tears fall. No words were exchanged.
The two did not notice the figure that stood at a distance from their table, a bittersweet smile on his face, frozen in his steps. The figure turned, resolutely walking away, without a glance back. Was I never enough?
The world continued to move around them - students joking with each other, laughing, giggling.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hankyung did not know whether to feel happy - for he had at least found another person from the same orphanage as Ryeowook - or feel upset that Jaejoong, too like Ryeowook, was an orphan.
His immediate reaction was to apologise like the reaction of everyone else when they first heard bad news, but he remembered what Ryeowook had told him when they first met.
“I don’t like it when people apologise. It only serves to remind me that they are dead.”
Jaejoong saved Hankyung from reacting to the news.
“It was a long time ago. To be honest, I don’t remember them much.”
Jaejoong shrugged as he made his way to the desk with his bag. His real parents died when he was very young and he had grown up with his current family. They were his family and that was that.
Hankyung followed behind, taking a seat across Jaejoong.
“I was one of the few lucky ones who were adopted after only a few months at the orphanage.”
Jaejoong begun, a faraway look appearing in his eyes as he remembered the times when he looked forward to the weekends for that were when couples came and children were adopted.
“Is that why you didn’t know about that?”
Hankyung pointed vaguely in the direction of the computer.
Jaejoong shook his head. “I knew instinctively that something was not quite right in the orphanage. The older kids - those past the age of ‘likely to be adopted’ - always disappeared somewhere at the same time everyday.”
He turned, a haunted look appearing.
“And some never came back.”
An ominous shadow engulfed Hankyung’s body. Is that what happened to Li Xu’s brother? Hankyung shuddered at that thought. It made him that slightly bit glad that he did not tell Ryeowook about this.
“Why are you interested in the article? Are you doing a research on something?”
Jaejoong asked, not wanting to think of the past any longer. The only desirable memory he had before his adoption was his dongsaeng - whom you cannot even remember the name!
Hankyung startled at the question. He looked at Jaejoong. Hankyung knew that it was not really his secret to tell about Ryeowook’s adoption, but if he wanted to find Ryeowook’s brother, he would probably require Jaejoong’s help.
“You probably have guessed at some point of time that we are not blood brothers.”
Jaejoong nodded. Hankyung and Ryeowook were different - Hankyung and his parents looked distinctly Chinese, while Ryeowook had a more petite structure and looked more Korean. And the fact that Hankyung spoke with a characteristic accent that was absent in Ryeowook gave the fact away. However just like how Donghae and Kibum were different from each other, everyone knew that they were brothers in every sense except blood.
“Ryeowook’s from the orphanage.”
Hankyung looked pained at having to say those words, causing Jaejoong to reach over to squeeze Hankyung’s hands.
“Ryeowook lost his memories when he was younger. It was only recently that he realised that he had a younger brother. And he wants to find him.”
Hankyung could not explain why his heart clenched at that thought. Jaejoong squeezed Hankyung’s hand tighter. He knew how Ryeowook felt, for he was doing the same thing - searching for his dongsaeng who was not even his blood dongsaeng.
But Jaejoong had also seen the looks on his sisters’ face when he mentioned going back to the orphanage when he was younger. They always seemed to fear that he would just leave them which confused him for it should be him fearing that they would leave him.
“Will you help me?”
Jaejoong nodded, admiring Hankyung’s courage and love for Ryeowook. “I’ll help you.”
Just then, the alarm on Jaejoong’s watch rang.
“I’m late!” Jaejoong jumped up, grabbing his bag. He flashed a worried look at Hankyung, who smiled, waving him away.
Jaejoong looked at his watch, and he knew that he could not afford to miss this lecture. Squeezing Hankyung’s shoulder once more, Jaejoong left.
“He won’t leave you.”
Hankyung turned, only to see Jaejoong speeding towards the door of the library. A small smile appeared on his face.
“Hello, I’m Han Geng.”
Hankyung said shyly, sitting down next to the younger boy. His parents were mingling with the new neighbours and had told him to go make friends with the child. He was hesitant for the other kids always made fun of his accent, but the loneliness made him seek out a friend.
The younger boy lifted his head slightly before ducking further away from him on the bench.
Hankyung sighed, knowing that this kid would react the same way as the rest. He hopped off the bench, moving to the bed of flowers in the garden, trying to entertain himself with the colourful flowers.
As he tried to remember the flower which his mother loved, a hand snuck into his line of vision. Hankyung blinked, looking at the purple flower before following the hand to its owner. It was the younger boy who smiled shyly at him.
“For me?”
The boy shook his head, turning slightly to point.
“For my Ma Ma?”
The boy nodded.
Hankyung smiled brightly, taking the flower into his hand. “What’s your name?”
“Ryeowook.”
Hankyung smiled widely, suddenly standing up and grabbing Ryeowook’s hand.
“Ma Ma! Ma Ma!”
The adults turned towards him, startled to see Hankyung running towards them with Ryeowook in tow.
“Ma Ma! Look! Li Xu got this for you!”
His mother kneeled down, gently taking the flower from Hankyung’s hand.
“This is beautiful. Thank you Li Xu.”
Ryeowook blushed, trying to hide behind Hankyung. Hankyung’s mother smiled and proceeded to shoo them off to play. Hankyung nodded, still holding onto Ryeowook’s hand as he made his way towards the playground.
“Hyung…”
Hankyung stopped in his steps. “Are you calling me?”
Ryeowook nodded. Hankyung felt a bubble inside him. It was the first time someone called him ‘Hyung’.
“Who’s Li Xu?”
Ryeowook corked his head to the side.
Hankyung laughed. “That’s you silly. Ryeowook is Li Xu in Korean.”
Ryeowook giggled slightly at Hankyung’s explanation which did not quite make sense.
And that was the beginning.
“Li Xu!”
Hankyung called out. “Li Xu! Where are you?”
The house was dark and empty. Hankyung knew that he should not have let Ryeowook escape from his sight. But his mother told him that Ryeowook needed some time on his own. Now he regretted listening to his mother.
“Li Xu! Ryeowook!”
Hankyung continued to call out, as he switched on the light. The living room was empty.
“Li Xu!”
Hankyung shouted as he moved up the staircase. Opening every door to the rooms, checking all the closet, Hankyung still did not manage to find Ryeowook. He let out a sigh of frustration, running his fingers through his hair. Then it occurred to Hankyung that there might be this one place where Ryeowook would be at.
Dashing out the house and banging the door behind him, Hankyung ran with all his might, ignoring the cold wind blowing against him, towards the playground where they first met. Panting as he neared, Hankyung spotted the person he had been looking for.
“Li Xu!”
Hankyung called out but Ryeowook made no indication that he had heard Hankyung. Hankyung stopped next to Ryeowook, trying to regain his breath. He kneeled down in front of Ryeowook, almost pleading for Ryeowook to look at him, instead of staring blankly out.
“Ryeowoook. Look at me. Please.”
Perhaps it was the pleading in Hankyung's voice that broke through the haze, but whatever it was, Hankyung was thankful.
Ryeowook looked at Hankyung, tears finally falling from his eyes as he fell from the swing into Hankyung's arms.
“Why?”
Hankyung felt the tears falling as well, wrapping his arms around Ryeowook.
“I don't know Li Xu. I don't know.”
And that was the day Ryeowook moved into Hankyung's house.
Hankyung persuaded his parents to adopt Ryeowook, knowing that they were the only people that Ryeowook knew outside his parents and Ryeowook had no one else. His parents agreed, but before they could rejoice at the new family member, Ryeowook fell sick - very sick. Hankyung and his parents spent the next week worrying over Ryeowook, praying and waiting for their new family to recover.
And his prayers were answered. Ryeowook recovered, but be it from the illness or from the stress; Ryeowook had forgotten everything that occurred before he met Hankyung. His doctor said that it could be the mind's way of dealing with the lost of a second set of parents that caused the memories of his first set to be sealed away deep in his mind. Ryeowook might one day regain his memories, or he might die without remembering a single thing.
Hankyung did not want to think about the future if Ryeowook discovered the orphanage. He did not want to lose his brother. Some part of him was glad that Ryeowook remembered the wrong name and believed that his brother died for it meant that Ryeowook would stop looking for his brother and would remain as Hankyung's dongsaeng - as much as Ryeowook was very upset about the news about the fire.
It was an unreasonable fear - that Hankyung knew - but he wanted Ryeowook to remain as his dongsaeng.
Hankyung sighed, returning the cd back to its original position on the shelf. Picking up his bag, Hankyung headed out of the library, his heart wishing for someone to be there with him.
“Yah! Hankyung! Where were you?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kyuhyun sat on one of the plastic chairs that were filled with people, all waiting in line. He had just come out of the doctor’s office and was waiting to collect his medicine and to pay for the bill. He was the picture of calm and poise as opposed to the slight groaning that were emitting from the other patients around the room.
“Cho Kyuhyun-sshi?”
Kyuhyun snapped out of his day dreams, making his way towards the counter. He watched as the pharmacist mechanically explained to him the different bottles of medicine and how he should take them. He wished that he could be as detached as the pharmacist about his whole situation.
Nodding at the appropriate places, Kyuhyun picked up the bag of medicine and left the hospital. Blinking slightly as the sun shone down brightly, Kyuhyun wondered what he should do now. His feet wandered, taking him down the streets of the city he never explored. His eyes moved from side to side, absorbing all the sights and sounds of the bustling city - the laughter, the car engines, the birds tweeting, the giggling, and the occasional shouting of profanities.
His aimless wandering led him to an amusement park. He stood in front of it, watching the children running and chasing each other with the parents watching with a fond look from afar, occasionally asking the children to be careful. He yearned to know how that felt like.
Taking out his wallet, Kyuhyun bought a ticket and entered, even though he knew that he really did not have that much to spend. That was one of the reasons why he did not go for his appointment. Kyuhyun knew that it was Brian who had been paying for his medical bills which despite the subsidies still amounted to a phenomenal amount over the years. He was grateful but Kyuhyun could not bring himself to express it to Brian. He knew - it was the way of life - that Brian would leave him once more. Everyone did.
Kyuhyun walked further into the park, marveling at the different machines - from the pirate boat, to the bumper cars to the roller coasters. He saw the huge smiles plastered on every single person’s face, all enjoying their day at the park. Briefly Kyuhyun wondered why there were so many people on a school day, cleaning forgetting the fact that it was a school day for him as well.
Kyuhyun stopped in front of a large roller coaster track, listening to the screams as the train came zooming down the track. He memorised the facial expressions of the girl, the boy, the teenagers, and the adults, etching them in his mind. Would I look like this as well?
His fingers curled tightly around the handle straps of the bag as he stood there, just watching.
“Kyuhyun-sshi?”
Kyuhyun turned around, startled.
“Kibum-sshi?”
Kyuhyun was shocked to see Kibum at the amusement park as well. The sound of plastic rustling reminded Kyuhyun that he was still holding his medicine in his hand. Swiftly, he pretended that he was searching for his phone in his bag and dumped the plastic bag in. Just then, his phone did ring.
“Hello?”
“How was it, Kyuhyun?”
Kyuhyun stiffened, knowing that Kibum was watching him.
“It’s still the same.”
“Don’t lie to me.”
Kyuhyun stilled his voice.
“I’m not, Brian-sshi.”
There was silence across the line. Kyuhyun knew that he had hurt Brian with what he had just called him, but he could not bring himself past the barrier to call Brian ‘Hyung’.
“Take care of yourself, Kyuhyun.”
Kyuhyun nodded, ending the call. He glanced back at Kibum, and saw that Kibum gave him the privacy to answer his call.
“Kibum-sshi, what are you doing here?”
Kibum’s answer was just to point at a figure running towards them. Kyuhyun squinted before realising who it was. A soft smile appeared on Kyuhyun’s face as the figure approached.
“Kibummie! I thought I told you to wait for me! Why - Kyuhyun? What are you doing here?”
Donghae stopped in mid-sentence as he noticed Kyuhyun’s presence.
“I’m just walking around, Donghae-sshi.”
“Just call me Donghae! We are the same age after all!”
Kyuhyun was about to inject something but Donghae cut him off.
“You can join us! No one should be alone in the amusement park. Come!”
Donghae proceeded to grab Kibum’s and Kyuhyun’s hands, dragging them towards the stalls.
Donghae only released their hands when they arrived at the stall. He wanted to try his hand at knocking over the stack of cans. The prize attracted him.
“Kyuhyun-sshi?”
Kibum asked, noticing that Kyuhyun was looking a little pale from their fast walk to the stall. Kyuhyun shook his head.
“Just call my hyung his name or you’ll get him repeating it to you every single time.”
Kibum chose to believe Kyuhyun for now.
“I think I’m younger though.”
Kibum frowned. “I thought your birthday’s in February?”
“How did you know that?”
Donghae was completely engrossed in his game, not hearing a single word of the conversation behind them.
Kibum fought to hide the blush that appeared. He had heard someone mention it somewhere. It was unintentional. Those people were talking too loudly.
Kyuhyun was famous in his own way in the campus. Besides being the transferee scholar, his boyish looks easily attracted the attention of the girls, even some boys in the university. Add the allusive behaviour and the fact that Kyuhyun only seemed to interact with them - it was a mystery that the rest wanted to solve.
“Er.. I heard it from some girls.”
Kyuhyun looked confused at Kibum.
“Hyung is born in October. He should be younger than you.” Kibum tried to re-direct the conversation.
“But I am younger.”
Kibum was now definitely confused. “Huh?”
“What?”
Donghae threw the ball, startled at his dongsaeng’s loud voice. He spun around swiftly.
“What’s wrong?”
All Donghae saw was Kibum staring incredulously at Kyuhyun.
“Congratulations Sir!”
“Huh?”
Donghae turned back to the stall owner, only to have his jaw drop. The stack of cans was no longer there.
“You’ve won yourself a prize! What would you like?”
Donghae was still trying to recover from his shock. I was not even aiming! He pointed to the monkey at the corner of the stall, knowing exactly where he was going to put it in his room.
“Does it mean you’re my dongsaeng?”
Kyuhyun nodded at Kibum’s question, laughing slightly at Kibum’s expression. Kibum’s face turned red as thoughts raced through his mind. Donghae bounced up to the pair, still oblivious of the conversation that had occurred.
“Look!”
Donghae happily showed off his new monkey.
“I’m going to name him… Kibum? Why are you so red?”
Kibum shook his head vigorously, trying to hide from Donghae’s hands.
“Nothing. I’m fine. It’s just the sun. I’m going to the toilet.”
Kibum dashed off, trying hard not to run.
He has a nice laugh.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Zhou Mi left Sungmin’s room, his mind still swirling with the information he had just received. Zhou Mi had tucked Sungmin into bed after Sungmin had cried himself to sleep. He wanted to stay in there with Sungmin, but first he had someone to find.
Zhou Mi stormed towards the practice room, knowing that he would be there at this time of the day.
“Shindong!”
Shindong glanced up from his punching and then turned back. He knew what was coming up since the afternoon.
“Gear up.”
Shindong said as he continued punching.
Zhou Mi did as he was told, a furious expression on his face. Both of them climbed into the ring, facing each other.
They stared at each other for three seconds, before the first punch was thrown.
“How could you - ” Zhou Mi threw his fist out to the left. “- let him go alone?”
Shindong ducked, and blocked the kick that came from the right.
“Do you know what happened to him?”
Zhou Mi screamed as he rained punches and kicks on Shindong. And all Shindong did was block and duck.
“What were you doing?”
They continued to bounce in circles around the ring with one attacking and the other on defence. Shindong saw the furious look in Zhou Mi’s eyes, and felt his own anger grew. He timed his punch perfectly, left hooking Zhou Mi on the face.
Zhou Mi fell to the floor, hand rising to wipe off the blood that trickled from the corner of his mouth.
“Do you think that I don’t feel guilty about it? Do you think I don’t think about it every day at night? How it would be different if only I didn’t have remedial? If I didn’t help Sungmin convince the boss? If I was there?”
Shindong threw another punch as Zhou Mi tried to stand, knocking the other back to the ground.
“You don’t know what we’ve been through, ‘cos you weren’t there.”
Shindong spat out the blood in his mouth from the punch Zhou Mi managed to plant on him, leaving the ring.
Zhou Mi was left alone in the room, lying flat facing the ceiling and panting from the exertion. Shindong had hit the crux of his anger.
Why wasn’t I there for them? For him?
Zhou Mi stared at the ceiling, thinking why he was not there the whole night, with Sungmin’s tearful face at the front of his mind.
A/N: Sorry for the late update! My laptop died on me and I had almost completed the chapter on it… So I had to re-type. This is the time when I’m grateful for the fact that I like to scribble some of my plot with pen and paper. Still the good old invention of the past. The next chapter might not be on so quickly as I can only type at work (yikes) until I get a new laptop (maybe) or when my laptop is fixed.
Hope you enjoyed the chapter!
Author: vic_sim
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone, anything, except for the plot.
Characters: Super Junior + Henry, Zhou Mi, DBSK
Category: General
Rating: PG-13
Archive
Zhou Mi could not stop the gasp from escaping, his hand reaching over to comfort his hyung, only to have Sungmin pull his hands back. Zhou Mi looked at Sungmin with pain-filled eyes and guilt for not being there. Sungmin blinked, looking away. Even though it occurred almost 3 years ago, the memories were still fresh in his mind.
“Sungmin…”
Zhou Mi stood up, walking round the table. He sat next to Sungmin, pulling the smaller man into his arms. He knew that the rest of the conversation was not to be held here. Zhou Mi felt Sungmin’s hands grabbed onto his shirt, twisting the cloth. Zhou Mi looked up at the ceiling, refusing to let the tears fall. No words were exchanged.
The two did not notice the figure that stood at a distance from their table, a bittersweet smile on his face, frozen in his steps. The figure turned, resolutely walking away, without a glance back. Was I never enough?
The world continued to move around them - students joking with each other, laughing, giggling.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hankyung did not know whether to feel happy - for he had at least found another person from the same orphanage as Ryeowook - or feel upset that Jaejoong, too like Ryeowook, was an orphan.
His immediate reaction was to apologise like the reaction of everyone else when they first heard bad news, but he remembered what Ryeowook had told him when they first met.
“I don’t like it when people apologise. It only serves to remind me that they are dead.”
Jaejoong saved Hankyung from reacting to the news.
“It was a long time ago. To be honest, I don’t remember them much.”
Jaejoong shrugged as he made his way to the desk with his bag. His real parents died when he was very young and he had grown up with his current family. They were his family and that was that.
Hankyung followed behind, taking a seat across Jaejoong.
“I was one of the few lucky ones who were adopted after only a few months at the orphanage.”
Jaejoong begun, a faraway look appearing in his eyes as he remembered the times when he looked forward to the weekends for that were when couples came and children were adopted.
“Is that why you didn’t know about that?”
Hankyung pointed vaguely in the direction of the computer.
Jaejoong shook his head. “I knew instinctively that something was not quite right in the orphanage. The older kids - those past the age of ‘likely to be adopted’ - always disappeared somewhere at the same time everyday.”
He turned, a haunted look appearing.
“And some never came back.”
An ominous shadow engulfed Hankyung’s body. Is that what happened to Li Xu’s brother? Hankyung shuddered at that thought. It made him that slightly bit glad that he did not tell Ryeowook about this.
“Why are you interested in the article? Are you doing a research on something?”
Jaejoong asked, not wanting to think of the past any longer. The only desirable memory he had before his adoption was his dongsaeng - whom you cannot even remember the name!
Hankyung startled at the question. He looked at Jaejoong. Hankyung knew that it was not really his secret to tell about Ryeowook’s adoption, but if he wanted to find Ryeowook’s brother, he would probably require Jaejoong’s help.
“You probably have guessed at some point of time that we are not blood brothers.”
Jaejoong nodded. Hankyung and Ryeowook were different - Hankyung and his parents looked distinctly Chinese, while Ryeowook had a more petite structure and looked more Korean. And the fact that Hankyung spoke with a characteristic accent that was absent in Ryeowook gave the fact away. However just like how Donghae and Kibum were different from each other, everyone knew that they were brothers in every sense except blood.
“Ryeowook’s from the orphanage.”
Hankyung looked pained at having to say those words, causing Jaejoong to reach over to squeeze Hankyung’s hands.
“Ryeowook lost his memories when he was younger. It was only recently that he realised that he had a younger brother. And he wants to find him.”
Hankyung could not explain why his heart clenched at that thought. Jaejoong squeezed Hankyung’s hand tighter. He knew how Ryeowook felt, for he was doing the same thing - searching for his dongsaeng who was not even his blood dongsaeng.
But Jaejoong had also seen the looks on his sisters’ face when he mentioned going back to the orphanage when he was younger. They always seemed to fear that he would just leave them which confused him for it should be him fearing that they would leave him.
“Will you help me?”
Jaejoong nodded, admiring Hankyung’s courage and love for Ryeowook. “I’ll help you.”
Just then, the alarm on Jaejoong’s watch rang.
“I’m late!” Jaejoong jumped up, grabbing his bag. He flashed a worried look at Hankyung, who smiled, waving him away.
Jaejoong looked at his watch, and he knew that he could not afford to miss this lecture. Squeezing Hankyung’s shoulder once more, Jaejoong left.
“He won’t leave you.”
Hankyung turned, only to see Jaejoong speeding towards the door of the library. A small smile appeared on his face.
“Hello, I’m Han Geng.”
Hankyung said shyly, sitting down next to the younger boy. His parents were mingling with the new neighbours and had told him to go make friends with the child. He was hesitant for the other kids always made fun of his accent, but the loneliness made him seek out a friend.
The younger boy lifted his head slightly before ducking further away from him on the bench.
Hankyung sighed, knowing that this kid would react the same way as the rest. He hopped off the bench, moving to the bed of flowers in the garden, trying to entertain himself with the colourful flowers.
As he tried to remember the flower which his mother loved, a hand snuck into his line of vision. Hankyung blinked, looking at the purple flower before following the hand to its owner. It was the younger boy who smiled shyly at him.
“For me?”
The boy shook his head, turning slightly to point.
“For my Ma Ma?”
The boy nodded.
Hankyung smiled brightly, taking the flower into his hand. “What’s your name?”
“Ryeowook.”
Hankyung smiled widely, suddenly standing up and grabbing Ryeowook’s hand.
“Ma Ma! Ma Ma!”
The adults turned towards him, startled to see Hankyung running towards them with Ryeowook in tow.
“Ma Ma! Look! Li Xu got this for you!”
His mother kneeled down, gently taking the flower from Hankyung’s hand.
“This is beautiful. Thank you Li Xu.”
Ryeowook blushed, trying to hide behind Hankyung. Hankyung’s mother smiled and proceeded to shoo them off to play. Hankyung nodded, still holding onto Ryeowook’s hand as he made his way towards the playground.
“Hyung…”
Hankyung stopped in his steps. “Are you calling me?”
Ryeowook nodded. Hankyung felt a bubble inside him. It was the first time someone called him ‘Hyung’.
“Who’s Li Xu?”
Ryeowook corked his head to the side.
Hankyung laughed. “That’s you silly. Ryeowook is Li Xu in Korean.”
Ryeowook giggled slightly at Hankyung’s explanation which did not quite make sense.
And that was the beginning.
“Li Xu!”
Hankyung called out. “Li Xu! Where are you?”
The house was dark and empty. Hankyung knew that he should not have let Ryeowook escape from his sight. But his mother told him that Ryeowook needed some time on his own. Now he regretted listening to his mother.
“Li Xu! Ryeowook!”
Hankyung continued to call out, as he switched on the light. The living room was empty.
“Li Xu!”
Hankyung shouted as he moved up the staircase. Opening every door to the rooms, checking all the closet, Hankyung still did not manage to find Ryeowook. He let out a sigh of frustration, running his fingers through his hair. Then it occurred to Hankyung that there might be this one place where Ryeowook would be at.
Dashing out the house and banging the door behind him, Hankyung ran with all his might, ignoring the cold wind blowing against him, towards the playground where they first met. Panting as he neared, Hankyung spotted the person he had been looking for.
“Li Xu!”
Hankyung called out but Ryeowook made no indication that he had heard Hankyung. Hankyung stopped next to Ryeowook, trying to regain his breath. He kneeled down in front of Ryeowook, almost pleading for Ryeowook to look at him, instead of staring blankly out.
“Ryeowoook. Look at me. Please.”
Perhaps it was the pleading in Hankyung's voice that broke through the haze, but whatever it was, Hankyung was thankful.
Ryeowook looked at Hankyung, tears finally falling from his eyes as he fell from the swing into Hankyung's arms.
“Why?”
Hankyung felt the tears falling as well, wrapping his arms around Ryeowook.
“I don't know Li Xu. I don't know.”
And that was the day Ryeowook moved into Hankyung's house.
Hankyung persuaded his parents to adopt Ryeowook, knowing that they were the only people that Ryeowook knew outside his parents and Ryeowook had no one else. His parents agreed, but before they could rejoice at the new family member, Ryeowook fell sick - very sick. Hankyung and his parents spent the next week worrying over Ryeowook, praying and waiting for their new family to recover.
And his prayers were answered. Ryeowook recovered, but be it from the illness or from the stress; Ryeowook had forgotten everything that occurred before he met Hankyung. His doctor said that it could be the mind's way of dealing with the lost of a second set of parents that caused the memories of his first set to be sealed away deep in his mind. Ryeowook might one day regain his memories, or he might die without remembering a single thing.
Hankyung did not want to think about the future if Ryeowook discovered the orphanage. He did not want to lose his brother. Some part of him was glad that Ryeowook remembered the wrong name and believed that his brother died for it meant that Ryeowook would stop looking for his brother and would remain as Hankyung's dongsaeng - as much as Ryeowook was very upset about the news about the fire.
It was an unreasonable fear - that Hankyung knew - but he wanted Ryeowook to remain as his dongsaeng.
Hankyung sighed, returning the cd back to its original position on the shelf. Picking up his bag, Hankyung headed out of the library, his heart wishing for someone to be there with him.
“Yah! Hankyung! Where were you?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kyuhyun sat on one of the plastic chairs that were filled with people, all waiting in line. He had just come out of the doctor’s office and was waiting to collect his medicine and to pay for the bill. He was the picture of calm and poise as opposed to the slight groaning that were emitting from the other patients around the room.
“Cho Kyuhyun-sshi?”
Kyuhyun snapped out of his day dreams, making his way towards the counter. He watched as the pharmacist mechanically explained to him the different bottles of medicine and how he should take them. He wished that he could be as detached as the pharmacist about his whole situation.
Nodding at the appropriate places, Kyuhyun picked up the bag of medicine and left the hospital. Blinking slightly as the sun shone down brightly, Kyuhyun wondered what he should do now. His feet wandered, taking him down the streets of the city he never explored. His eyes moved from side to side, absorbing all the sights and sounds of the bustling city - the laughter, the car engines, the birds tweeting, the giggling, and the occasional shouting of profanities.
His aimless wandering led him to an amusement park. He stood in front of it, watching the children running and chasing each other with the parents watching with a fond look from afar, occasionally asking the children to be careful. He yearned to know how that felt like.
Taking out his wallet, Kyuhyun bought a ticket and entered, even though he knew that he really did not have that much to spend. That was one of the reasons why he did not go for his appointment. Kyuhyun knew that it was Brian who had been paying for his medical bills which despite the subsidies still amounted to a phenomenal amount over the years. He was grateful but Kyuhyun could not bring himself to express it to Brian. He knew - it was the way of life - that Brian would leave him once more. Everyone did.
Kyuhyun walked further into the park, marveling at the different machines - from the pirate boat, to the bumper cars to the roller coasters. He saw the huge smiles plastered on every single person’s face, all enjoying their day at the park. Briefly Kyuhyun wondered why there were so many people on a school day, cleaning forgetting the fact that it was a school day for him as well.
Kyuhyun stopped in front of a large roller coaster track, listening to the screams as the train came zooming down the track. He memorised the facial expressions of the girl, the boy, the teenagers, and the adults, etching them in his mind. Would I look like this as well?
His fingers curled tightly around the handle straps of the bag as he stood there, just watching.
“Kyuhyun-sshi?”
Kyuhyun turned around, startled.
“Kibum-sshi?”
Kyuhyun was shocked to see Kibum at the amusement park as well. The sound of plastic rustling reminded Kyuhyun that he was still holding his medicine in his hand. Swiftly, he pretended that he was searching for his phone in his bag and dumped the plastic bag in. Just then, his phone did ring.
“Hello?”
“How was it, Kyuhyun?”
Kyuhyun stiffened, knowing that Kibum was watching him.
“It’s still the same.”
“Don’t lie to me.”
Kyuhyun stilled his voice.
“I’m not, Brian-sshi.”
There was silence across the line. Kyuhyun knew that he had hurt Brian with what he had just called him, but he could not bring himself past the barrier to call Brian ‘Hyung’.
“Take care of yourself, Kyuhyun.”
Kyuhyun nodded, ending the call. He glanced back at Kibum, and saw that Kibum gave him the privacy to answer his call.
“Kibum-sshi, what are you doing here?”
Kibum’s answer was just to point at a figure running towards them. Kyuhyun squinted before realising who it was. A soft smile appeared on Kyuhyun’s face as the figure approached.
“Kibummie! I thought I told you to wait for me! Why - Kyuhyun? What are you doing here?”
Donghae stopped in mid-sentence as he noticed Kyuhyun’s presence.
“I’m just walking around, Donghae-sshi.”
“Just call me Donghae! We are the same age after all!”
Kyuhyun was about to inject something but Donghae cut him off.
“You can join us! No one should be alone in the amusement park. Come!”
Donghae proceeded to grab Kibum’s and Kyuhyun’s hands, dragging them towards the stalls.
Donghae only released their hands when they arrived at the stall. He wanted to try his hand at knocking over the stack of cans. The prize attracted him.
“Kyuhyun-sshi?”
Kibum asked, noticing that Kyuhyun was looking a little pale from their fast walk to the stall. Kyuhyun shook his head.
“Just call my hyung his name or you’ll get him repeating it to you every single time.”
Kibum chose to believe Kyuhyun for now.
“I think I’m younger though.”
Kibum frowned. “I thought your birthday’s in February?”
“How did you know that?”
Donghae was completely engrossed in his game, not hearing a single word of the conversation behind them.
Kibum fought to hide the blush that appeared. He had heard someone mention it somewhere. It was unintentional. Those people were talking too loudly.
Kyuhyun was famous in his own way in the campus. Besides being the transferee scholar, his boyish looks easily attracted the attention of the girls, even some boys in the university. Add the allusive behaviour and the fact that Kyuhyun only seemed to interact with them - it was a mystery that the rest wanted to solve.
“Er.. I heard it from some girls.”
Kyuhyun looked confused at Kibum.
“Hyung is born in October. He should be younger than you.” Kibum tried to re-direct the conversation.
“But I am younger.”
Kibum was now definitely confused. “Huh?”
“What?”
Donghae threw the ball, startled at his dongsaeng’s loud voice. He spun around swiftly.
“What’s wrong?”
All Donghae saw was Kibum staring incredulously at Kyuhyun.
“Congratulations Sir!”
“Huh?”
Donghae turned back to the stall owner, only to have his jaw drop. The stack of cans was no longer there.
“You’ve won yourself a prize! What would you like?”
Donghae was still trying to recover from his shock. I was not even aiming! He pointed to the monkey at the corner of the stall, knowing exactly where he was going to put it in his room.
“Does it mean you’re my dongsaeng?”
Kyuhyun nodded at Kibum’s question, laughing slightly at Kibum’s expression. Kibum’s face turned red as thoughts raced through his mind. Donghae bounced up to the pair, still oblivious of the conversation that had occurred.
“Look!”
Donghae happily showed off his new monkey.
“I’m going to name him… Kibum? Why are you so red?”
Kibum shook his head vigorously, trying to hide from Donghae’s hands.
“Nothing. I’m fine. It’s just the sun. I’m going to the toilet.”
Kibum dashed off, trying hard not to run.
He has a nice laugh.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Zhou Mi left Sungmin’s room, his mind still swirling with the information he had just received. Zhou Mi had tucked Sungmin into bed after Sungmin had cried himself to sleep. He wanted to stay in there with Sungmin, but first he had someone to find.
Zhou Mi stormed towards the practice room, knowing that he would be there at this time of the day.
“Shindong!”
Shindong glanced up from his punching and then turned back. He knew what was coming up since the afternoon.
“Gear up.”
Shindong said as he continued punching.
Zhou Mi did as he was told, a furious expression on his face. Both of them climbed into the ring, facing each other.
They stared at each other for three seconds, before the first punch was thrown.
“How could you - ” Zhou Mi threw his fist out to the left. “- let him go alone?”
Shindong ducked, and blocked the kick that came from the right.
“Do you know what happened to him?”
Zhou Mi screamed as he rained punches and kicks on Shindong. And all Shindong did was block and duck.
“What were you doing?”
They continued to bounce in circles around the ring with one attacking and the other on defence. Shindong saw the furious look in Zhou Mi’s eyes, and felt his own anger grew. He timed his punch perfectly, left hooking Zhou Mi on the face.
Zhou Mi fell to the floor, hand rising to wipe off the blood that trickled from the corner of his mouth.
“Do you think that I don’t feel guilty about it? Do you think I don’t think about it every day at night? How it would be different if only I didn’t have remedial? If I didn’t help Sungmin convince the boss? If I was there?”
Shindong threw another punch as Zhou Mi tried to stand, knocking the other back to the ground.
“You don’t know what we’ve been through, ‘cos you weren’t there.”
Shindong spat out the blood in his mouth from the punch Zhou Mi managed to plant on him, leaving the ring.
Zhou Mi was left alone in the room, lying flat facing the ceiling and panting from the exertion. Shindong had hit the crux of his anger.
Why wasn’t I there for them? For him?
Zhou Mi stared at the ceiling, thinking why he was not there the whole night, with Sungmin’s tearful face at the front of his mind.
A/N: Sorry for the late update! My laptop died on me and I had almost completed the chapter on it… So I had to re-type. This is the time when I’m grateful for the fact that I like to scribble some of my plot with pen and paper. Still the good old invention of the past. The next chapter might not be on so quickly as I can only type at work (yikes) until I get a new laptop (maybe) or when my laptop is fixed.
Hope you enjoyed the chapter!