(no subject)
stolen from Sodo cause it's funny :P
Bolded - Applies to me
Italics - Applies to my mother
Underlined - Applies to my family and me
· You unwrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can save and reuse the wrapping (and especially those bows) next year.
· You only buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50%off.
· When there's a sale on toilet paper, you buy a hundred rolls and store them in your closet or in the bedroom of an adult child who has moved out. <-my mums stacks in the foyer and it's incredibly embarrassing when friends come over
· You have a vinyl table cloth on your kitchen table. <- we don't even have a table. hehe
· Your stove is covered with aluminum foil.
· Your stove has a sticky film of grease over it.
· You have stuff in the freezer since the beginning of time. <- we actually had to get a new fridge because it was just soooo gross, and that ice was taking over the freezer part and the fridge.
· You use the dishwasher as a dish rack. <- dishwasher became so grotty that was chucked out too.
· You've never used your dishwasher. (don't have one)
· You keep a thermos of hot water available at all times.
· You boil water and put it in the refrigerator.
· You eat all meals in the kitchen.
· You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers.
· You use grocery bags to hold garbage.
· You always leave your shoes at the door. <- my mother still does this, everyone else just wears their shoes inside, so i don't know why my mother bothers.
· You have a piano in your living room.
· Your parents know how to launch nasal projectiles.
· You iron your own shirts.
· You play a musical instrument.
· You pick your teeth at the dinner table (but you cover mouth).
· You twirl you pen around your fingers. <- i had to practise doing this for all of high school until i got it, it doesn't just come naturally for me ;)
· You hate to waste food...
a) Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away the leftovers on the table, you'll finish them.
b) You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing.
· You don't own any real Tupperware--only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars.
· You also use the jam jars as drinking jars as glasses. hahaha, just looking around the kitchen, that's almost all we have
· You've eaten a red bean popsicle.
· You bring oranges (other produce) with you as a gift when you visit other people's homes.
· You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottles that you take every time you stay in a hotel.
· The condiments in your fridge are either Price Club-sized or come in plastic packets which you save or steal every time you get takeout or go to McDonald's.
· Ditto paper napkins.
· You never order room service.
· You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (and travel means any car ride longer than 10 minutes)...
These travel snacks are always dried. As in not just dried plums, dried ginger, and beef/pork jerky, but dried cuttlefish (squid).
· You own a rice cooker. <- doesn't everyone not asian also own one? i seriously thought they did.
· You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it.
· You spit bones and other food scraps on the table. (That's why you need the vinyl tablecloth.) (not spitted but they do end up there)
· Your parents vehemently refused the sack of gold coin oranges that their guests brought just to be courteous.
· You fight over who pays the dinner bill.
· Your Dad thinks he can fix everything himself.
· You majored in something practical like Engineering, Medicine, or Law.
· When you go to a dance party, there are a wall of guys surrounding the dance floor trying to look cool.
· You live with your parents, and you are 30 years old (and they prefer it that way). Or if you're married and 30 years old, you live in an apartment next door to your parents, or at least in the same neighborhood.
· You don't use measuring cups.
· You feel like you've gotten a good deal if you didn't pay tax.
· You beat eggs with chopsticks.
· Your parents' house is always cold.
· You have a teacup with a cover on it.
· You reuse tea bags.
· You have a drawer full of old pens, most of which don't write anymore.
· If you're under age 20, you own a really expensive Walkman. If you're over 20, you own a very expensive camera.
· Your mom drives her Mercedes (or any expensive car) to the Price Club.
· You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since calling Information costs 50 cents.
· You tip Chinese delivery guys/waiters more.
· You're a wok user.
· You only make long distance calls after 11 p.m.
· You know all the waiters at your favorite Chinese restaurant.
· You like Chinese films in their original undubbed versions...
a) You love Chinese Martial Arts films.
b) Shao-Lin and Wu-Tang actually mean something to you.
· You have acquired a taste for bittermelon.
· You like congee with thousand-year-old eggs.
· You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached--it means they're fresh.
· You never call your parents just to say "hi".
· You always cook too much.
· If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.
· Also, if you don't live at home, your parents always want you to come home.
· Your parents tell you to boil herbs and stay inside when you get sick.
· When you're sick, they also tell you not to eat fried foods or baked goods because they produce hot air ("yeet hay" in Cantonese) a sick diet consists of porridge or soupy noodles how exciting <-they say not to eat fried foods but for completely other supid reasons.
· You e-mail your Chinese friends at work, even though you only sit only ten feet apart.
· Your parents never go to the movies.
· Your parents sent money to their relatives in the Far East.
· You use a face cloth.
· Your parents use a clothesline.
· You're always late. <-i'm only ever late because i wait for my mother who's always being late.
· You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table.
· You starve yourself before going to all-you-can-eat Sushi.
· You've joined a CD club at least once.
· You know someone who can get you a good deal on jewelry or electronics.
· You never discuss your love life with your parents.
· Your parents are never happy with your grades.
· You save your old Coke bottle glasses even though you're never going to use them again.
· You keep used batteries.
· You own your own meat cleaver and sharpen it.
· You keep most of your money in a savings account.
· You know that MJ means. (tis chinka game)
· You've been on the love boat or know someone who has.
· Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin.
have i bitched about bill bailey being cancelled yet? tis not fair :( i was looking forward to something after my dynamics exam. oh well, get to see muse in 1 week. *swoooooons*
Bolded - Applies to me
Italics - Applies to my mother
Underlined - Applies to my family and me
· You unwrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can save and reuse the wrapping (and especially those bows) next year.
· You only buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50%off.
· When there's a sale on toilet paper, you buy a hundred rolls and store them in your closet or in the bedroom of an adult child who has moved out. <-my mums stacks in the foyer and it's incredibly embarrassing when friends come over
· You have a vinyl table cloth on your kitchen table. <- we don't even have a table. hehe
· Your stove is covered with aluminum foil.
· Your stove has a sticky film of grease over it.
· You have stuff in the freezer since the beginning of time. <- we actually had to get a new fridge because it was just soooo gross, and that ice was taking over the freezer part and the fridge.
· You use the dishwasher as a dish rack. <- dishwasher became so grotty that was chucked out too.
· You've never used your dishwasher. (don't have one)
· You keep a thermos of hot water available at all times.
· You boil water and put it in the refrigerator.
· You eat all meals in the kitchen.
· You save grocery bags, tin foil, and tin containers.
· You use grocery bags to hold garbage.
· You always leave your shoes at the door. <- my mother still does this, everyone else just wears their shoes inside, so i don't know why my mother bothers.
· You have a piano in your living room.
· Your parents know how to launch nasal projectiles.
· You iron your own shirts.
· You play a musical instrument.
· You pick your teeth at the dinner table (but you cover mouth).
· You twirl you pen around your fingers. <- i had to practise doing this for all of high school until i got it, it doesn't just come naturally for me ;)
· You hate to waste food...
a) Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away the leftovers on the table, you'll finish them.
b) You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing.
· You don't own any real Tupperware--only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars.
· You also use the jam jars as drinking jars as glasses. hahaha, just looking around the kitchen, that's almost all we have
· You've eaten a red bean popsicle.
· You bring oranges (other produce) with you as a gift when you visit other people's homes.
· You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottles that you take every time you stay in a hotel.
· The condiments in your fridge are either Price Club-sized or come in plastic packets which you save or steal every time you get takeout or go to McDonald's.
· Ditto paper napkins.
· You never order room service.
· You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (and travel means any car ride longer than 10 minutes)...
These travel snacks are always dried. As in not just dried plums, dried ginger, and beef/pork jerky, but dried cuttlefish (squid).
· You own a rice cooker. <- doesn't everyone not asian also own one? i seriously thought they did.
· You wash your rice at least 2-3 times before cooking it.
· You spit bones and other food scraps on the table. (That's why you need the vinyl tablecloth.) (not spitted but they do end up there)
· Your parents vehemently refused the sack of gold coin oranges that their guests brought just to be courteous.
· You fight over who pays the dinner bill.
· Your Dad thinks he can fix everything himself.
· You majored in something practical like Engineering, Medicine, or Law.
· When you go to a dance party, there are a wall of guys surrounding the dance floor trying to look cool.
· You live with your parents, and you are 30 years old (and they prefer it that way). Or if you're married and 30 years old, you live in an apartment next door to your parents, or at least in the same neighborhood.
· You don't use measuring cups.
· You feel like you've gotten a good deal if you didn't pay tax.
· You beat eggs with chopsticks.
· Your parents' house is always cold.
· You have a teacup with a cover on it.
· You reuse tea bags.
· You have a drawer full of old pens, most of which don't write anymore.
· If you're under age 20, you own a really expensive Walkman. If you're over 20, you own a very expensive camera.
· Your mom drives her Mercedes (or any expensive car) to the Price Club.
· You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since calling Information costs 50 cents.
· You tip Chinese delivery guys/waiters more.
· You're a wok user.
· You only make long distance calls after 11 p.m.
· You know all the waiters at your favorite Chinese restaurant.
· You like Chinese films in their original undubbed versions...
a) You love Chinese Martial Arts films.
b) Shao-Lin and Wu-Tang actually mean something to you.
· You have acquired a taste for bittermelon.
· You like congee with thousand-year-old eggs.
· You prefer your shrimp with the heads and legs still attached--it means they're fresh.
· You never call your parents just to say "hi".
· You always cook too much.
· If you don't live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.
· Also, if you don't live at home, your parents always want you to come home.
· Your parents tell you to boil herbs and stay inside when you get sick.
· When you're sick, they also tell you not to eat fried foods or baked goods because they produce hot air ("yeet hay" in Cantonese) a sick diet consists of porridge or soupy noodles how exciting <-they say not to eat fried foods but for completely other supid reasons.
· You e-mail your Chinese friends at work, even though you only sit only ten feet apart.
· Your parents never go to the movies.
· Your parents sent money to their relatives in the Far East.
· You use a face cloth.
· Your parents use a clothesline.
· You're always late. <-i'm only ever late because i wait for my mother who's always being late.
· You eat every last grain of rice in your bowl, but don't eat the last piece of food on the table.
· You starve yourself before going to all-you-can-eat Sushi.
· You've joined a CD club at least once.
· You know someone who can get you a good deal on jewelry or electronics.
· You never discuss your love life with your parents.
· Your parents are never happy with your grades.
· You save your old Coke bottle glasses even though you're never going to use them again.
· You keep used batteries.
· You own your own meat cleaver and sharpen it.
· You keep most of your money in a savings account.
· You know that MJ means. (tis chinka game)
· You've been on the love boat or know someone who has.
· Your toothpaste tubes are all squeezed paper-thin.
have i bitched about bill bailey being cancelled yet? tis not fair :( i was looking forward to something after my dynamics exam. oh well, get to see muse in 1 week. *swoooooons*