Fic: A Thousand Things Forbidden (Lamb, Lilly) R

[sadiekate]

Title: A Thousand Things Forbidden
Author: sadiekate
Characters/Pairing: Lamb, Lilly
Rating: R for language
Word Count: 1,057
Summary: Dreams about dead girls are such a cliche.
Spoilers/Warning: Takes place just post season-one. Spoilery for that.
Author's Note: About to be x-posted all over the damn place (as in, veronicamarsfic and fic_from_mars). Written for the dream

Comments

[kibarika]

Lovely as always. Kinda wish I could SEE it though. My brain is not satisfactory at transferring your brilliant words to the pictures I like to have; it would be ideal if I could see the dialogue and then read the in betweens all at the same time. C'mon, brain, work with me here!

I like your Lamb. I want to see him on TV. Because there can never be enough of him.

[sadiekate]

Spin-off!

I have trouble visualizing this story too, actually. I might have made it too dense or something with the dreaminess. I could have made it more visually accessible.

[kibarika]

I intended it not as a criticism.

[sadiekate]

Oh, I know, darlin'. But I had been thinking that my ownself. I tend to go back and read stuff a day after I've posted it and realize all I could have done to make it BETTER.

[lila82]

Oh, wow. So damn goooooooood! Writing a story within a dream, and making it work with canon AND seem realistic, was quite a challenge, and you did an excellent job. I don't like Lilly, but I adore Lamb and I loved your peak into his subconscious and the guilt he'd never admit to having, but you know he has to be feeling about Lilly's murder and the multiple ways he screwed up. You have the voices nailed, great dialogue, and very good insight into Lamb's head.

I have to say, given my phobia about sharks, this part gave me the chills:

"And now he’s freezing cold all over, and she’s not kissing him anymore, and he’s not beside the ocean, he’s in it, and there’s blood in the water all around him, and the sharks are closing in and he can’t breathe and

Ouch, poor Lamb. Blood and sex and death all mixed together, and still no resolution to the guilt.

Great job. And thanks again for the rec.

[sadiekate]

Oh gosh, no problem. I am always happy to rec great fic.

And dude, I totally freaked myself out writing the shark parts. I am terrified of sharks. Like, I won't even go into a swimming pool at night, because I'm afraid somehow a shark's going to bust in.

Thanks for your lovely and thoughtful feedback.

[mosca]

I really like your Lamb, his sort of impotent snark and his resistance, when Lilly is so right. I absolutely believe that this is how he experiences those dead-girl dreams that everyone gets: Every night the bitch comes up with a new way to kill him, and even though he’s awake, he could swear that he hears her laughing. This is brutal and very funny, and I enjoyed it a lot.

[sadiekate]

Wow, thanks. I like the "brutal and funny" - I think it's a new combo for me.

[anonymous]

Whoaaa...

You own Lamb. I don't think anyone else has the same grip on him as you. Can't wait to see more from your Big damn table!

[babsonite]

Hi, this was me. I don't know why that happened...

[sadiekate]

Hee. Hello!

*OMGlovesyouricon*

[babsonite]

*Jimmy Lovers Unite*

[kuromatic]

This has a very nice ebb and flow. I particularly liked:

"Lamb thinks back to his Intro to Psych class he took freshman year of college. This is probably a manifestation of his guilt, or something. Or it means he’s going to die. Or it means he’s worried about sexual inadequacy. Or maybe Lilly is supposed to represent his mother."

It's the mental equivalent of taking a ride in one of those spinning tea cups. Just the kind of chain-reaction writing I like best :)

[sadiekate]

Aww, thanks so much! I'm glad you enjoyed. The writing of this did feel kind of ebb and flow as I was doing it - I think because of the whole dream thing.