Cut the cards, cut the deck
I've always dreamed of living in the suburbs. TV makes it seem so awesome. You know, the sitcoms, the mini-van commercials, cartoons. Hell, even the slasher flicks make it all look good until the killing starts. Growing up in the shadow of skyscrapers makes you wanna see something blue. Something green. Something, you know, alive.
I can still hear my momma. "What's the big deal, Bobby? You still sleep in a bed and shit in a toilet. All the rest is just for show." She wasn't too thrilled when I moved away, either. Twenty years of breaking by back as my apartment's maintenance guy and I finally had the cash saved up to buy my own little piece of heaven.
Now, I'll be honest. It was the dumpiest house on the block, but dammit, I was gunna make it shine. If I could keep an over-populated rat hole of an apartment building functioning, then this little two floor gem would be no sweat. There was a dead tree in the yard that would need to go, shutters that'd need stripping and repainting, and the gutters would all need to be replaced. Even so, I loved its dull red paint and gray roof. By next summer it would be perfect.
Inside, the house was alright. The knotty wood floors creaked under my boots, but I thought it gave the place some character. There was an unfinished, cold basement that was begging to become a game room. Some windows were cracked, the plaster walls had a few chips, and the lights flickered a little, but the repairs would all be easy.
The real challenge was out in the backyard, or what little you could see. The house sat on the edge of this rocky and steep hill that dropped to a wooded creek fifteen feet below. God, the view was beautiful from inside, but when you'd open the back sliding glass door, all there was was this huge, rotted deck. If it had even been finished and stained, it was impossible to tell. The wood sagged all dull and molded and I could hear the supports groan in the wind. The back railing was missing, along with a chunk of the back right corner. It looked like someone just gave up on the whole thing and left it for lost.
I was so excited to get started on fixing it. It'd take a lot of work, a ton of lumber, but when I could finally sit on that deck and crack open a beer, it would be worth it. Besides the deck, there was no real usable land behind the house. I owned a portion of the creek and all the rocks under the deck, but that was it.
I had all my shit moved in by the end of the week, not that I had a lot to move. By the next week, I had the lights fixed and the windows replaced. I even got the shutters sorted. The next month me and some pals managed to cut down, chop up, and haul away the dead tree out front. Once it was gone, I spent the day seeding the lawn, weeding the empty flower beds, and planting new bushes out front. By time night came I was exhausted.
So, when I saw some guy on the deck staring in at me through the sliding glass door, I told myself I was just seeing things. While I might really enjoy a good horror movie, I knew ghosts didn't exist and no one would be dumb enough to climb up onto that rickety deck just to peek in on me. A good hot shower would clear my mind.
The water was heaven, thanks to the adjustments I made to the water heater. Just as I was really starting to relax, I heard it. Just above the sound of the running water was the heavy groan of wood. Worried that the deck might finally be collapsing, I turned the water off and listened again for the sound. This time it was loud and clear. Not outside, not in the hall, the groan was within the bathroom. The deep sound was mixed with the chirp of a crack as the floor tiles' grout began to crumble and break apart, starting near the tub and running out towards the door.
"What the fuck?" I reached for my towel and moved my foot to step out of the tub. The moment my skin touched the tile, I felt it all fall away. Tile and chunks of wood tumbled into the basement below. The curtain came down with me as I jumped back into the tub. Wooden moans and shattering tile was soon joined by the metallic whine of pipes straining behind the walls and floor.
"Shit, shit, shit!" I had to get out of there. The hole my foot had made before was growing and it quickly swallowed the sink, the whole fixture tumbling into the darkness below. Then the nose of the tub dipped. Gripping onto the edge, I struggled out of the end of it, onto the toilet, and then made a leap for the door. My chest slammed against the jagged and splintered edge of the hallway as I struggled to grab onto the door frame and pull myself up. It took everything in me, but I managed to rake myself up and over that painful edge.
My bathroom was a hole, the pipes now part of some horrible fountain that poured freely into my basement. Once I peeled my eyes from the carnage, I looked at my cut and bleeding chest and stomach and began to pick the thick chunks of wood and tile from my skin. I might have begun to try to reason how this could have happened if I didn't hear the groans again.
Despite the pain, I was on my feet. I had to get out of the house. There wasn't time to even think about getting dressed. Stumbling, I rounded the corner but froze in the hallway at the sight of a man standing in the living room, blocking my path to the front door. He stood on two feet that were mangled to the point that toes faced toes beneath him. His clothes were too filthy and too blood stained to tell where any of the injuries were, and his face- white sunken skin cut and scrapped all to hell, the tip of his nose missing completely.
"You said it was safe," he managed past the gargles of fluids he could not swallow. One twisted foot stepped ahead of the other. "You swore."
"I-I. I don't know what you're talking ab-" Before I could finish, a shower of plaster rained down over the man. Seconds after, my bedroom fell on top of him, taking him and my living room to the basement.
There was no other way to run. The kitchen was beginning to bow and dip, the ceiling above me beginning to break apart. So I ran to the only place my panicked mind could think of: the deck. In fear of a wall falling on me, I staggered to the middle of it and fell to my knees. It was all falling apart. I knew I should still be trying to get my ass to safety, but I couldn't force my body to move as I heard what was likely my kitchen falling away to join the rest of my house in the basement.
There is was again. A long, gurgling breath just behind me. "I trusted you."
I turned around and struggled a few inches back against the rough wood. "I don't know who you think I am, but I didn't do anything to you!"
"I thought you knew what you were doing. You said you had done it before." He took a step forward and I moved further back. The whole deck swayed and groaned and I froze, suddenly remembering where exactly I was.
"M-My name is Robert Gain! I j-just bought this house! Please don't hurt me!"
Still, he moved forward. "You saw me fall. I wasn't-" It faltered, fluids leaking from his mouth and splattering on the wood. "-dead before you hid my body."
I tried to move back a bit further but felt my hand slip from the edge of the deck. Faster than I could even grasp, I was falling.
When I woke up, I was in a hospital room. My momma was there, insisting that she move in to keep an eye on me. Story was, I had passed out in my front yard while planting one of my new hydrangeas and a neighbor called an ambulance for me. When I got home, I was relieved to find everything in place, all the floors and ceiling where they should be.
Then, I did something crazy. I started to dig around the in the rocks under the deck. It only took me a day to find the decayed remains of the previous owner who had gone missing shortly after getting a handy friend of his to put in his brand new deck.
I think I'll get a professional to do the work, after all.
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