Present Tense (oneshot)
Title: Present Tense
Pairing: Jongkey
Rating: PG-13
Genre: fluff/angst
Word count: 600ish
Summary: The past and the future are irrelevant. Nothing else matters but right now.
A/N: This is my way of dealing with weird things going on in my life right now. I tried to capture these feelings as best I could. I think it turned out okay. ENJOY!
Even though Kibum knows how terrible it is, he still can’t resist that initial embrace; lying down, head tucked in against Jonghyun’s neck and arms wrapped around his waist. In those moments, he really starts to believe that these actions won’t have any repercussions. What he’s doing is perfectly fine. Nothing bad will come out of it. It’s a fucking cuddle, for christ’s sake. Everybody needs a good cuddle. The soft material of a sweatshirt moving along his arms, the rhythmic breathing against his chest, his eyelashes barely touching Jonghyun’s skin as he blink his eyes.
It’s innocence in its purest form. But it’s deadly.
Kibum doesn’t think about the past. All of the tabloids with Jonghyun’s name plastered all over them, stories of the singer’s new girlfriend running on all of the entertainment news shows. Kibum doesn’t think about walking in on them kissing backstage last week, and he definitely doesn’t think about the look that crosses Jonghyun’s face whenever she’s mentioned.
He forgets all about how alone he’d felt that night when the news broke. He hadn’t known beforehand; in fact, nobody had. He doesn’t remember sitting in the dark, staring at the television screen with hot tears welling in his wide eyes.
How can he, when the only boy he’s ever been in love with is currently nuzzling the side of his neck with the top of his nose? Kibum laughs; a low cheerful sounding laugh that carries loudly through the silent room. Jonghyun shifts and their bodies slide easily against the cotton sheets. The younger boy stares at the singer now currently hovering above him with a softness in his eyes that he reserves specifically for Jonghyun. The two boys stay like this for a few moments until falling leaves catch their eyes from outside the window.
A cold breeze comes in and blows over them, causing Kibum to shiver slightly. With a smile, Jonghyun lowers himself and wraps his limbs tightly around the younger boy, making sure he’s as warm as possible. The dancer embraces him tightly, sighing quietly as the singer starts to place open-mouthed kisses along the side of his neck.
Kibum doesn’t think about the future. He doesn’t think about what will happen if the rest of the members find out, let alone the media. He doesn’t consider what will happen when Jonghyun visits her later tonight for their private date. Kibum doesn’t think about how hurt he’ll be the moment Jonghyun walks in the door with that satisfied smile on his face. If he even comes home at all. The aspect of sitting alone in his bunk at night waiting for the front door to open doesn’t cross his mind once.
That doesn’t matter right now. Nothing matters right now. How can it, when Kibum can feel the faint thump of his muse’s heart on his chest, when a puff of minty breath glides across his cheek, when deft hands work down his torso? The dancer keeps his eyes shut, letting his other senses paint a picture of what’s before him. Light lips press a kiss on top of his closed eyelids, and Kibum can practically feel the smile forming on Jonghyun’s face.
He’ll regret this soon, but to Kibum, there is nothing better than right now. As their warm bodies move together underneath the white sheets, Kibum memorizes this moment and locks it away deep inside himself. He’ll bring it out when the world feels dark and empty, and he’ll cherish it.