A Different Kind of Shine (Part Five)
Title: A Different Kind of Shine
Author: Jenn
Rating: R?...could go up in later chapters.
Length: 1689 for this chapter
Spoilers: All of Season One
Summary: Quinn is a laid back surfer type. Rachel is... well, Rachel. Inspired by this Prompt at rq_meme
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Brittany bounced into their dorm with a huge grin on her face. She dropped her stuff on her desk and then turned to Rachel’s bed and skipped across the room. Rachel laughed and put her book on the table beside her as the dancer snuggled under the comforter, her head on Rachel’s shoulder. The brunette had begun staying awake on the nights that Brittany would go out with Santana but not stay at her apartment. The first time she’d done it, she had been worried because Brittany hadn’t called but then the tall blonde had been so excited that Rachel had waited up for her that she began to do it every time.
Initially, Rachel was put off because she felt that she needed the proper amount of rest each night to be able to function proficiently the next morning. One happy smile from Brittany and she had quickly changed her mind.
“Did you enjoy your date, Britt?”
Rachel felt the grin on the blonde’s face as she nuzzled further into her shoulder and clutched her waist. “I did! San took me on a picnic in the park across from campus! Rach there were ducks in the pond!”
The brunette laughed and returned the squeeze around her waist. “That sounds wonderful, Britt. I am so happy the two of you are doing so well.”
Brittany sighed happily. “So how was your date with Quinn?”
“It wasn’t a date, Britt. We’re just friends.”
The dancer frowned and propped her chin up on her palm. “But you like her.”
Brittany’s brow was drawn down in confusion and possibly distress. Rachel knew Britt hated when she was sad so she often made sure to reassure her best friend with bright smiles and hugs. “I’m happy we’re friends, Britt. I could have liked Quinn, but we are both very different and want different things. She doesn’t like me the way that I might have liked her.”
Brittany continued to frown for a moment before sighing and returning her head to Rachel’s shoulder. “I think she does, Rach. You’d be like the best girlfriend ever and if I didn’t totally like Santana, I would be your girlfriend. I’m glad you’re my best friend though, I get to keep you forever, no matter what.”
Rachel turned her eyes to the ceiling and once again thanked whomever was responsible for bringing her Brittany. She had never felt so much love and care from another person and thought that whatever reservations she ever had about UCLA and California were completely insignificant if it meant having the dancer as her best friend. “I’m glad you’re my best friend too, Britt. And you will have me no matter what, forever and ever.”
Brittany smiled and pulled the comforter up higher. “Night. Love you, Rach.”
Reaching beside her, she turned off the lamp and then pressed a kiss on the blonde head beneath her chin. “Love you too, Britt.
*****
Brittany’s infectious laughter brought an instant smile to both Quinn and Rachel’s face. The four of them were sitting around a bright, crackling fire as people milled all around them. Brittany had dragged them all down to the beach for a party around sunset and the other three had finally managed to get the tall blonde to sit down and enjoy the fire.
Quinn watched Rachel scowl at her roommate playfully as Brittany recounted a story about their first night in the dorm together. The brunette’s face was lit up in happiness even as the glow of the fire chased shadows across her face. It had taken Quinn by surprise how easily she had fallen into a friendship with the singer, especially since her motives had been less then platonic to begin with.
Just last night, Santana had questioned her again about the nature of her intentions. Again, Quinn reiterated that she wanted to know the brunette and see if she could get the driven girl to relax and have fun. Sleeping with Rachel was still something Quinn was interested in but she found herself just enjoying being around her as well. It was actually a notion that made her nervous.
Quinn realized quickly that Rachel wasn’t opposed to fun in the slightest, she just had certain restrictions that she seemed absolutely unwilling to give on. There was something holding her back, Quinn was sure but Rachel wasn’t keen on sharing things about her past. She had told Quinn that she had one serious boyfriend in high school, was unpopular, and had two dads.
So it was obvious that Quinn would have to offer up part of her past to sway Rachel into confiding. The problem with that plan was twofold. One: Quinn didn’t like to talk about or think about her past at all. Two: Quinn actually wanted to talk to Rachel about her past.
Rachel was quickly becoming someone Quinn valued and mixing that idea with the feelings of attraction she harbored did not bode well for her commitment to keeping it simple. It was a tightrope that she had decided to walk, however.
Noticing the brunette rubbing her temples, she leaned closer. “Headache?”
Rachel nodded and Quinn stood, offering her hand. “Want to go for a walk?”
Rachel hesitated, she had been trying to avoid intimate situations that left her alone with the blonde. Walking together on an empty beach under the brightest stars she’d seen since moving to California certainly qualified as intimate. Taking a breath, she steeled herself against those kinds of feelings and let Quinn pull her up.
They were quiet as they walked, the voices and music from the party fading to a muted echo. As the waves licked at their feet, Rachel bit her lip and asked a question she’d wanted to since first seeing the blonde. “Why do you surf, Quinn?”
The blonde turned and tilted her head slightly. “Why?”
Rachel nodded. “What do you like about it?”
Quinn bobbed her head and then shrugged, glancing out into the night. “To be honest, at first I only did it because I figures that’s what you did if you lived by the ocean.”
“And now?”
Quinn breathed deeply and then glanced over at Rachel. “Now, I guess I like the way I feel when I’m out there. The ocean is so wide and deep you know? It’s kind of one of those unfathomable things. It’s cold and salty, it can be a tempest and destroy almost any manmade creation, yet it sustains life and things thrive beneath its surface. But for a few moments, the tide comes in and a wave forms and you can ride it. It’s exhilarating.”
Rachel had stopped and was listening to Quinn carefully, hanging on her every word. Quinn nearly blushed under her gaze. She smiled and then turned to begin walking again, Rachel following silently. The blonde was trying to come up with a way to start the conversation when Rachel did it for her, albeit in a slightly different way than she planned.
“Quinn, you don’t have to answer me, but I’m just curious. How do you live the way you do, so care free and without regret?”
Quinn knew part of that question was in reference to her ‘keep it simple’ take on relationships but decided not to focus on that part. Sighing, she tugged Rachel over and took a seat on the sand, just far enough that the surf could still tickle their toes.
“Rach, I don’t often talk about this stuff, but I don’t want you to think I’m reckless or careless. I do. I care about you and Brittany and Santana. My friends are important, I just don’t get close enough to make many.”
Rachel nodded but stayed silent as Quinn continued. “I suppose I try to be care free and live without regrets because I’ve lived a lot of my life extremely carefully and already have so many regrets.”
Quinn turned her eyes back out onto the ocean, focusing on the rippling reflection of the moon in the waves. “I lived in a conservative, small town in Georgia. My parents are the well to do type. My mom was the model wife and my dad couldn’t have been happier with his two perfect daughters. I was captain of the cheerleading team and president of the celibacy club. I went to church every Sunday, made straight A's and was one of the most popular girls in school. Santana was my second in command. I was also a bitch, vain, unkind, and selfish. I secretly hated myself because of the things I was doing and how I was treating people.”
Taking a deep breath, she turned back to look at Rachel. “I had questioned my sexuality in secret for almost a year when Santana came out to me. I was horrible, Rachel. I isolated my best friend and treated her like dirt because I thought I had no other choice. I kept her secret but the damage was done. She hated me and I hated myself. So one night when I was sixteen, I got drunk and had sex with a boy on the football team.”
Quinn had begun to tremble slightly and Rachel grabbed her hand. The blonde squeezed it and smiled before telling the final part of her story. “I hit rock bottom. I had no one once everything fell apart. I decided to keep the baby and put her up for adoption. When my parents found out, they gave me an ultimatum. I could either get rid of it or leave. In the heat of the moment, I told them the truth about me, about everything. My dad gave me thirty minutes to pack.”
Rachel gasped and held the pale hand in hers tighter. Quinn blinked back a few tears. “Santana took me in after I showed up on her doorstep. I begged her forgiveness and she just rolled her eyes and then pulled me into a hug. I stayed until the baby was born and then left Georgia completely. I came out here, became an emancipated minor and got my GED. Santana joined me as soon as she graduated. I haven’t spoken to my parents or my sister since.”
Quinn was silent for a bit before shaking her head and chuckling at the levity of the moment. “Not quite the answer you expected, I bet.”
The brunette bit her lip and then smiled, shrugging. “I think I understand.”
“I am finally living my life for the first time and I won’t let anyone’s perceptions or beliefs dictate the way I do it ever again.”
Rachel nodded again. “You’re very brave, Quinn. How were you able to afford it?”
“My mom’s father always favored me. He hated my dad and the way he treated me, so he started a trust in my name. When he passed away while I was pregnant, he left all his money to me. My parents didn’t see a dime.”
The brunette frowned. ‘What do you mean how your dad treated you?”
Quinn turned away and sighed. She really hadn’t planned on sharing so much with Rachel, but it felt like the floodgates had opened and she might drown from all the repressed feelings pouring out of her. “He was abusive, physically and verbally. That’s really all I want to say. I’m sorry.”
Rachel shook her head emphatically. “No, Quinn. Don’t apologize. I understand. I do however, find myself relieved that your father resides so far away, I’m afraid I wish physical harm on the man and doubt I could stop myself from striking him.”
Quinn smiled down at the brunette and shook her head, pulling her into her side. “I appreciate the thought, Short Stack.”
Rachel huffed but wrapped an arm around the blonde’s waist and smiled.
*****
Santana smirked at the other brunette from across the table. Rachel was ardently avoiding the scene at the front counter of the café where they were eating. The four of them were once again out to lunch and Santana could easily see a shift between her best friend and the singer. She knew that Rachel had been told about Quinn’s past and the confession seemed to bring them closer together.
The Latina shook her head as Rachel glanced up at the counter and then back down at her salad just as quickly. Quinn was leaning on the counter top, smiling and laughing with the red head behind the cash register. Santana watched her friend reached out to twine a strand of red hair around her finger. Rachel swallowed and the Latina sighed.
She knew Quinn wouldn’t settle down, but her behavior with Rachel was on a whole other level. Santana had never seen her friend work so hard to be around and get to know someone as she did with Rachel. It was obvious that she was feeling more than just lust and attraction for the singer. What wasn’t obvious was whether or not Quinn even realized it or was just actively denying it.
Santana knew the whole thing would end badly, though, of that she had no doubt.
Author: Jenn
Rating: R?...could go up in later chapters.
Length: 1689 for this chapter
Spoilers: All of Season One
Summary: Quinn is a laid back surfer type. Rachel is... well, Rachel. Inspired by this Prompt at rq_meme
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Part Four
Brittany bounced into their dorm with a huge grin on her face. She dropped her stuff on her desk and then turned to Rachel’s bed and skipped across the room. Rachel laughed and put her book on the table beside her as the dancer snuggled under the comforter, her head on Rachel’s shoulder. The brunette had begun staying awake on the nights that Brittany would go out with Santana but not stay at her apartment. The first time she’d done it, she had been worried because Brittany hadn’t called but then the tall blonde had been so excited that Rachel had waited up for her that she began to do it every time.
Initially, Rachel was put off because she felt that she needed the proper amount of rest each night to be able to function proficiently the next morning. One happy smile from Brittany and she had quickly changed her mind.
“Did you enjoy your date, Britt?”
Rachel felt the grin on the blonde’s face as she nuzzled further into her shoulder and clutched her waist. “I did! San took me on a picnic in the park across from campus! Rach there were ducks in the pond!”
The brunette laughed and returned the squeeze around her waist. “That sounds wonderful, Britt. I am so happy the two of you are doing so well.”
Brittany sighed happily. “So how was your date with Quinn?”
“It wasn’t a date, Britt. We’re just friends.”
The dancer frowned and propped her chin up on her palm. “But you like her.”
Brittany’s brow was drawn down in confusion and possibly distress. Rachel knew Britt hated when she was sad so she often made sure to reassure her best friend with bright smiles and hugs. “I’m happy we’re friends, Britt. I could have liked Quinn, but we are both very different and want different things. She doesn’t like me the way that I might have liked her.”
Brittany continued to frown for a moment before sighing and returning her head to Rachel’s shoulder. “I think she does, Rach. You’d be like the best girlfriend ever and if I didn’t totally like Santana, I would be your girlfriend. I’m glad you’re my best friend though, I get to keep you forever, no matter what.”
Rachel turned her eyes to the ceiling and once again thanked whomever was responsible for bringing her Brittany. She had never felt so much love and care from another person and thought that whatever reservations she ever had about UCLA and California were completely insignificant if it meant having the dancer as her best friend. “I’m glad you’re my best friend too, Britt. And you will have me no matter what, forever and ever.”
Brittany smiled and pulled the comforter up higher. “Night. Love you, Rach.”
Reaching beside her, she turned off the lamp and then pressed a kiss on the blonde head beneath her chin. “Love you too, Britt.
*****
Brittany’s infectious laughter brought an instant smile to both Quinn and Rachel’s face. The four of them were sitting around a bright, crackling fire as people milled all around them. Brittany had dragged them all down to the beach for a party around sunset and the other three had finally managed to get the tall blonde to sit down and enjoy the fire.
Quinn watched Rachel scowl at her roommate playfully as Brittany recounted a story about their first night in the dorm together. The brunette’s face was lit up in happiness even as the glow of the fire chased shadows across her face. It had taken Quinn by surprise how easily she had fallen into a friendship with the singer, especially since her motives had been less then platonic to begin with.
Just last night, Santana had questioned her again about the nature of her intentions. Again, Quinn reiterated that she wanted to know the brunette and see if she could get the driven girl to relax and have fun. Sleeping with Rachel was still something Quinn was interested in but she found herself just enjoying being around her as well. It was actually a notion that made her nervous.
Quinn realized quickly that Rachel wasn’t opposed to fun in the slightest, she just had certain restrictions that she seemed absolutely unwilling to give on. There was something holding her back, Quinn was sure but Rachel wasn’t keen on sharing things about her past. She had told Quinn that she had one serious boyfriend in high school, was unpopular, and had two dads.
So it was obvious that Quinn would have to offer up part of her past to sway Rachel into confiding. The problem with that plan was twofold. One: Quinn didn’t like to talk about or think about her past at all. Two: Quinn actually wanted to talk to Rachel about her past.
Rachel was quickly becoming someone Quinn valued and mixing that idea with the feelings of attraction she harbored did not bode well for her commitment to keeping it simple. It was a tightrope that she had decided to walk, however.
Noticing the brunette rubbing her temples, she leaned closer. “Headache?”
Rachel nodded and Quinn stood, offering her hand. “Want to go for a walk?”
Rachel hesitated, she had been trying to avoid intimate situations that left her alone with the blonde. Walking together on an empty beach under the brightest stars she’d seen since moving to California certainly qualified as intimate. Taking a breath, she steeled herself against those kinds of feelings and let Quinn pull her up.
They were quiet as they walked, the voices and music from the party fading to a muted echo. As the waves licked at their feet, Rachel bit her lip and asked a question she’d wanted to since first seeing the blonde. “Why do you surf, Quinn?”
The blonde turned and tilted her head slightly. “Why?”
Rachel nodded. “What do you like about it?”
Quinn bobbed her head and then shrugged, glancing out into the night. “To be honest, at first I only did it because I figures that’s what you did if you lived by the ocean.”
“And now?”
Quinn breathed deeply and then glanced over at Rachel. “Now, I guess I like the way I feel when I’m out there. The ocean is so wide and deep you know? It’s kind of one of those unfathomable things. It’s cold and salty, it can be a tempest and destroy almost any manmade creation, yet it sustains life and things thrive beneath its surface. But for a few moments, the tide comes in and a wave forms and you can ride it. It’s exhilarating.”
Rachel had stopped and was listening to Quinn carefully, hanging on her every word. Quinn nearly blushed under her gaze. She smiled and then turned to begin walking again, Rachel following silently. The blonde was trying to come up with a way to start the conversation when Rachel did it for her, albeit in a slightly different way than she planned.
“Quinn, you don’t have to answer me, but I’m just curious. How do you live the way you do, so care free and without regret?”
Quinn knew part of that question was in reference to her ‘keep it simple’ take on relationships but decided not to focus on that part. Sighing, she tugged Rachel over and took a seat on the sand, just far enough that the surf could still tickle their toes.
“Rach, I don’t often talk about this stuff, but I don’t want you to think I’m reckless or careless. I do. I care about you and Brittany and Santana. My friends are important, I just don’t get close enough to make many.”
Rachel nodded but stayed silent as Quinn continued. “I suppose I try to be care free and live without regrets because I’ve lived a lot of my life extremely carefully and already have so many regrets.”
Quinn turned her eyes back out onto the ocean, focusing on the rippling reflection of the moon in the waves. “I lived in a conservative, small town in Georgia. My parents are the well to do type. My mom was the model wife and my dad couldn’t have been happier with his two perfect daughters. I was captain of the cheerleading team and president of the celibacy club. I went to church every Sunday, made straight A's and was one of the most popular girls in school. Santana was my second in command. I was also a bitch, vain, unkind, and selfish. I secretly hated myself because of the things I was doing and how I was treating people.”
Taking a deep breath, she turned back to look at Rachel. “I had questioned my sexuality in secret for almost a year when Santana came out to me. I was horrible, Rachel. I isolated my best friend and treated her like dirt because I thought I had no other choice. I kept her secret but the damage was done. She hated me and I hated myself. So one night when I was sixteen, I got drunk and had sex with a boy on the football team.”
Quinn had begun to tremble slightly and Rachel grabbed her hand. The blonde squeezed it and smiled before telling the final part of her story. “I hit rock bottom. I had no one once everything fell apart. I decided to keep the baby and put her up for adoption. When my parents found out, they gave me an ultimatum. I could either get rid of it or leave. In the heat of the moment, I told them the truth about me, about everything. My dad gave me thirty minutes to pack.”
Rachel gasped and held the pale hand in hers tighter. Quinn blinked back a few tears. “Santana took me in after I showed up on her doorstep. I begged her forgiveness and she just rolled her eyes and then pulled me into a hug. I stayed until the baby was born and then left Georgia completely. I came out here, became an emancipated minor and got my GED. Santana joined me as soon as she graduated. I haven’t spoken to my parents or my sister since.”
Quinn was silent for a bit before shaking her head and chuckling at the levity of the moment. “Not quite the answer you expected, I bet.”
The brunette bit her lip and then smiled, shrugging. “I think I understand.”
“I am finally living my life for the first time and I won’t let anyone’s perceptions or beliefs dictate the way I do it ever again.”
Rachel nodded again. “You’re very brave, Quinn. How were you able to afford it?”
“My mom’s father always favored me. He hated my dad and the way he treated me, so he started a trust in my name. When he passed away while I was pregnant, he left all his money to me. My parents didn’t see a dime.”
The brunette frowned. ‘What do you mean how your dad treated you?”
Quinn turned away and sighed. She really hadn’t planned on sharing so much with Rachel, but it felt like the floodgates had opened and she might drown from all the repressed feelings pouring out of her. “He was abusive, physically and verbally. That’s really all I want to say. I’m sorry.”
Rachel shook her head emphatically. “No, Quinn. Don’t apologize. I understand. I do however, find myself relieved that your father resides so far away, I’m afraid I wish physical harm on the man and doubt I could stop myself from striking him.”
Quinn smiled down at the brunette and shook her head, pulling her into her side. “I appreciate the thought, Short Stack.”
Rachel huffed but wrapped an arm around the blonde’s waist and smiled.
*****
Santana smirked at the other brunette from across the table. Rachel was ardently avoiding the scene at the front counter of the café where they were eating. The four of them were once again out to lunch and Santana could easily see a shift between her best friend and the singer. She knew that Rachel had been told about Quinn’s past and the confession seemed to bring them closer together.
The Latina shook her head as Rachel glanced up at the counter and then back down at her salad just as quickly. Quinn was leaning on the counter top, smiling and laughing with the red head behind the cash register. Santana watched her friend reached out to twine a strand of red hair around her finger. Rachel swallowed and the Latina sighed.
She knew Quinn wouldn’t settle down, but her behavior with Rachel was on a whole other level. Santana had never seen her friend work so hard to be around and get to know someone as she did with Rachel. It was obvious that she was feeling more than just lust and attraction for the singer. What wasn’t obvious was whether or not Quinn even realized it or was just actively denying it.
Santana knew the whole thing would end badly, though, of that she had no doubt.