Title: Have Faith in Me
Pairings: Ian/Anthony, Anthony/OFC. Minor Mari/Sohinki, Joven/Lasercorn.
Ratings/Warnings: M; Slash, language, smut, parent!Ianthony
Summary: A night of passion between the Smosh boys and a strangers results in something...unexpected.
A/N: School's got me really busy. I'm sorry. But here's chapter 3!
Previous chapters:
Prologue Chapter 1 Chapter 2 “Are you coming, Anthony?” Ian yelled to Anthony, throwing Audrina’s diaper bag over his shoulder.
Anthony fumbled out of his room, frowning. “Coming where?”
Ian picked up Audrina and placed her on his hip. “To Babies’R’Us.”
Anthony frowned. “Babies’Ru’Us? Fuck no.”
Ian smiled slightly. “Look, it’s either you come with me or you stay here with Audrina. Your choice, man.”
“Why don’t I just stay here and you take Audrina with you?” Anthony asked, folding his arms over his chest.
“Because,” Ian explained, “I have a really long list and I can’t watch Audrina and shop at the same time. If you come, you can put stuff into the buggy and I’ll watch her. If you stay here, you’ll have to watch her alone.”
Anthony sighed. “And why should I agree with anything at all you say?”
Ian grinned. “Because I’m your best friend and you love me.”
Anthony gritted his teeth, defeated. He sighed before sliding his black Converse onto his feet. “Okay fine, you douche. But it’s just to get you off of my back. I know you’ll persist until I agree.”
“And you love me,” Ian chuckled.
“Yeah,” Anthony replied, “whatever. I love you.”
As Ian opened the door, his heart fluttered a little. Anthony had, after all, just said that he loved him.
You’re taking this way out of context, Ian thought to himself. Just focus on the baby, idiot.
“Hey!” Anthony exclaimed, chasing after Ian.
Ian stopped, turning around. “Huh?”
Anthony shut the door. “What are we supposed to take her in?”
“What do you mean?” Ian asked, frowning.
“I mean,” Anthony said, “that we don’t have a carseat. Nor do our cars have four doors.”
Ian sighed and looked down. To his utter surprise, there on the sidewalk sat a baby’s carseat. He looked up at Anthony, who
was hiding a grin.
“I guess Kara didn’t want to lug it into the house.”
***
Ian lifted Audrina into the child seat of their shopping cart. He frowned slightly at how apathetic she still looked. He looked up
at Anthony to see that was frowning, too, hands jammed in his pockets.
Anthony will come around, Ian thought to himself, I just really need to figure out what’s wrong with Audrina.
“What do we have to get?” Anthony grumbled, snapping Ian out of his thoughts.
“A lot of stuff,” Ian replied, “so we’re probably gonna need two buggies.
Anthony sighed, but he turned around headed back toward the front of the store to get another one.
Ian smiled to himself before he let his eyes trail back to the baby girl in front of him. “I’m sorry he hasn’t been very nice to you.
He’s just confused…and scared. Pretty soon, he’ll come around, I promise. You’re gonna like living with us.”
To his dismay, Audrina never smiled, she only watched him intently.
What the hell does this mean? He asked himself. It looked like he needed to buy a parenting book.
He scribbled parenting book onto his über long list as Anthony returned with another shopping cart.
“All right, fucker,” Anthony sighed, “what’s first on the list?”
Ian gave Anthony a dirty look. “Don’t use the F word in front of Audrey.”
Anthony rolled his eyes. “Stop being such a daddy, Ian.”
Ian looked down at his feet and muttered, “diapers. Lots of diapers.”
The taller man strolled over with his buggy to where a huge supply of different diapers were. He picked up a box of Luvs and
Ian shook his head.
Anthony frowned. “Why?”
“Because,” Ian replied, “Luvs are plastic-y. We want Huggies.” He pointed to the red packages.
Sighing, Anthony grabbed a box and threw it into the cart. “How do you know so much about diapers, anyway?”
Ian shrugged. “I have little cousins, dude. And we’re gonna need a lot more than that.”
Surprisingly, Anthony grabbed an armload of diaper packages and dropped them into the cart with no complaint.
Ian smiled, eyes drifting back to the list. “Food, clothes, toys, wipes, cream, a crib, a stroller, bows, books-“
“Hold on!” Anthony exclaimed, “can we afford all of this shit?”
“Language!” Ian snapped, “and yes, we can. We have to, for Audrey’s sake.”
Anthony opened his mouth to retort, but he was interrupted by a woman who appeared to be in her late forties or perhaps early fifties. Her hair was frosted blond and in a stylish bob. She was clad in what appeared to be an expensive pink sweatsuit and clean white Nikes. She wore a huge diamond ring and gold band on her left hand and had snow white sunglasses
perched on her head; the epitome of a California housewife.
“Excuse me,” she said, smiling at Ian, “I know this probably sounds strange, but you’re such a cute family!”
Anthony’s head snapped toward her and he frowned, but Ian beamed immediately. Before Anthony could clear up the benighted woman’s delusions, Ian had exclaimed, “thank you!”
“How long have you been together?” she asked, quizzically.
“We’re not-” Anthony went to say, but was interrupted by Ian’s quick exclaim.
“About ten years! But we’ve known each other longer,” he smiled largely at Anthony who only glared back.
The woman then turned her attention to Audrina, who had been watching intently. She grinned down at her and said, “she’s beautiful! How old is…What’s her name, dear?”
“This is Audrina Iris Hecox-Padilla,” Ian replied. “And she’s six months.” He grinned, playing absentmindedly with one of her pigtails.
She smiled, turning back to Ian. “She’s absolutely precious! Now, I stopped to ask you an important question, actually. My son is also gay and he and his partner want to have a child, too. What process did you two choose? He’s been debating between adoption and a surrogate.”
Ian shot Anthony an amused glance. “Well, we opted for a surrogate. Adoption takes a long time. Although, I will say that there are millions of children that need homes. It’s whatever works for your son, ma’am.”
She took one last look at Audrina before saying, “well, I must be going. But thank you so much for your help. My daughter’s son’s birthday is this week and I need to find him a gift. You have such a beautiful family.”
“Thank you,” Ian replied, “have a nice day!”
Once the crazy woman was out of earshot, Anthony attacked Ian. “What the hell was that, Ian?”
Ian chuckled. “She thought we were gay and it was funny so I played along.”
Anthony glared at him. “Dude, I have a girlfriend.”
Ian shrugged. “I know. Chill out, man. It was just a joke. And besides, what else are people supposed to think? Roommates raising a kid together? It doesn’t add up, dude.”
The taller man rolled his eyes. “Exactly. Everyone’s gonna assume we’re gay. And what’s that gonna do to Smosh?!”
Ian sighed, tossing a package of pacifiers into the buggy. “Absolutely nothing. No one around here gives a crap about Smosh.
And anyone who does knows us well enough to know that we aren’t gay. So please, chill out.”
“All right,” Anthony breathed in defeat, “but don’t ever say we’re a couple again, Ian. That was…wrong.”
Admittedly, Ian felt a small pang of sadness at Anthony’s words, but he ignored them. Instead, he studied a packet of bottles.
“Would being with me really be that bad?”
Anthony sighed. “That’s…that’s not what I meant, Ian, and you know it.”
“Yeah,” Ian lied, “I know. Just…forget it. I won’t say anything else that makes us seem gay. Let’s just finish up here, okay?”
Anthony could tell that he’d upset Ian, but like his best friend, he decided not to press it any further. “Okay.”
Ian wouldn’t tell Anthony that he wished desperately for Anthony to want to be with him. Instead, he’d continue buying things
for Audrina and pretending to be happy for Anthony and Alyssa.