Some quite fascinating information about former Coronation Street actress Sarah Lancashire.

[wardytron]

If you're an avid reader of the Daily Mail, a keen fan of the former Coronation Street actress Sarah Lancashire, and in possession of an unusually good memory - it's a long shot, I grant you - then you'll probably remember this article by Kathryn Knight from April 2003. Ah, April 2003, when "Make Luv" by Room 5 featuring Oliver Cheatham topped the

Comments

[whizzerandchips]

Yessssss. The first comment on a Wardytron post ect...

If I was a barber, in Twickenham, and I'm not, but if I was, I'd be crapping myself that having cut Pete Townsends hair, and the transaction completed, he'd twat the place to bits with his guitar. Phew, it's a good job I'm not a barber. In Twickenham.

[wardytron]

I think it was Pete Townshend anyway, it definitely looked like him. Also, you know the comedian Milton Jones? No? Well anyway, I saw him the other day as well. He has a registered business address for Milton Jones Limited at 186 Amyand Park Road, if you want to send him a Christmas card or something.

[whizzerandchips]

You'd know if it was Pete Townsend. He'd be carrying a broken guitar and researching dodgy kids sites on the internets for his next musical project.

I envy you your plethora of famous neighbours wardytron. Round here all we have is Hiacinth Bucket and that woman who sang 'Downtown', and as neither of them are getting a Christmas card from me nor will Milton Jones. I don't care how many times he asks. The answer's No.

[wardytron]

I saw the Guardian's parliamentary sketchwriter Simon Hoggart the other night as well. He's got quite a chimplike face, look:

[wardytron]

I'm not very happy with the idea of Noddy Holder not living in the West Midlands, it seems wrong somehow. Unnatural. Good news though - Wikipedia says he's been rumoured to replace Paul Rodgers as the lead singer of Queen. Just imagine!

[oldbloke]

Queen to replace one guy who can't sing by another who can't sing, then? Some people are just weird.

[atommickbrane]

The dude who was Room 5 also did "da hype" ft FB Smith out of the Cure - I can't remember how it goes but it's good that Room 5 or Junior Jack as was in this case gets to collaborate. He must be super popular! Not with me though, Make Luv is awful.

[wardytron]

I'd never heard of Room 5 or Oliver Cheatham until I looked on everyhit.com to see what was no. 1 in April 2003. I've since learned that Room 5 was a project of Junior Jack, an Italian music producer whose real name is Vito Lucente. But yes, he's collaborated with all the stars - Brenda Edwards, Erick Morillo and Terra Deva, Olivier Gosseries, Nadia Mampaey, Onika Henderson. It's like a Who's Who of people you've never heard of.

[whizzerandchips]

I don't understand any of this!

[medusa]

All I know about Sarah Lancashire is that she has the same birthday as me and is exactly ten years older - something that I make a point of reminding myself every year when I wake up feeling decrepit on said day. 'Hah,' I tell myself, 'at least I am not Sarah Lancashire! I bet she is on the gin already!'

[wardytron]

I've had to make this entry friends-only because the Daily Mail article quotes an acquaintance who says "Given her own obsessive guarding of her privacy, talking about her to the Press is the quickest way to social Siberia with her." Social Siberia is the last place I want to go. There's also a quote from a TV executive who says "She refuses to become one of those wafer-thin actresses constantly on a diet." That's true, actually. You could tell she had a fat arse in those stonewashed, elasticated waistband jeans she was wearing.

[medusa]

It's not much to go on but the stone washed jeans and fat arse combination definitely makes her sound like a Gin For Breakfast sort. Hell, even a Gin Before Breakfast one.

It's a bit like Dorian Grey. I am not sure how, but it is.

[wardytron]

I felt quite superior in my chinos, buying some orange juice and the Sunday Times. But then I'm not one of television's best-known actresses, or married to Peter Salmon, Director of BBC North. In fact I'm not married to anyone named after a fish. Not Magnus Pike, not Feargal Sharkey. I can't think of any others.

[oldbloke]

If you didn't exist, Wardytron, it would be necessary to invent you.

And frankly that'd be quite a job, so it's rather handy you do exist.

[wardytron]

Well that's lovely, and something to reassure me as I struggle under the workload of responding to my daily stack of letters and emails demanding that I stop existing, for the sake of everything good and holy.