frühling » otac na službenom putu

Mar 20, 2006 19:56


on this, the first day of spring, i made my way to the airport at five in the morning. i felt anxious and the stars were pressing themselves up against the windshield as we drove. i would have rolled down the window to embrace them all, let them fall into my lap, but once the sun broke open on the eastern horizon they began their slow retreat into ( Read more... )

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Comments 74

storto March 21 2006, 05:05:00 UTC
Airports, are magical.. it seems. Especially in the early, early mornings. You are such a darling, you really are. I find that from your comments and from your entry, that we are in similar if not identical positions. I'm here for you, as always. We'll explore together, okay? Uncovering new meanings, thoughts and ideas - Pushing through sorrow, happiness + confusion.

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wartimeheroine March 22 2006, 13:27:54 UTC
i long for new meanings and would love to cross the border with you. merci. x

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heynameless March 21 2006, 05:13:49 UTC
I've been asking myself the same questions regarding fate and emptiness; so far it's caused nothing but heartbreak and tears over beautiful things.

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wartimeheroine March 22 2006, 15:52:23 UTC
it's important to ask ourselves these questions, but i wonder - will we ever find the answers, or simply create new, simpler versions of our identities?

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phenomenologic March 21 2006, 05:25:34 UTC
I'm not sure everyone feels the inherent sadness of airports. They often dress them up so much but that just detracts from hundreds--or thousands--of people leaving in a day. Business or pleasure or education...whether you're loved by everyone or just a random face in the crowd... Even with all those returning and the warm embraces and the I-could-kiss-the-soil-I'm-so-happy-to-be-back...they seem to just...drag to me.

I live almost literally down the road from the tenth busiest airport in the US (nineteenth busiest of the world). All day I could sit and watch airplanes coming and going, low to the ground, passing each other. I always imagine someone up there as lonely as I am is looking down at me pensively.

I couldn't begin to imagine why you think you're meant to be alone. all humans will spend portions of their lives alone, sure...it takes on a different meaning when someone implies they think that's how it's supposed to be. Though, I could name why I'm meant to be alone, and often curse my heart for letting people in so quickly ( ... )

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wartimeheroine March 23 2006, 00:43:54 UTC
i love people watching at airports. i love how for some people, the departure or arrival is a very big emotional event - but for others [business people for example] it's completely routine, perhaps even a hassle.

i live right underneath the flight pattern for both a major military base and an international airport. i love the rumble of the engines and i too think about the passengers aboard.

*why am i meant to be alone? because i repeatedly mess up relationships on purpose when i feel that i'm getting too close to someone. i pull back and close up. i distance myself from people as soon as we reach a level of intimacy. even when the person is wonderful, i just... i don't know why. i lie to get out of social get-togethers, i insist on doing things by myself... i keep thinking maybe it's because i just haven't found the right group of friends, but i'm not sure.

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privateroads March 21 2006, 05:38:59 UTC
I've never heard anyone describe the sunrise that way.. mm.
it's been a while since I've come to read livejournal and I am still always impressed with you.

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wartimeheroine March 22 2006, 20:02:30 UTC
ah thank you.
you were the first person to add me at this account.
somehow i think that means something :]

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armedwithanoboe March 21 2006, 06:30:44 UTC
Nice to hear from you again! Where've you been?

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wartimeheroine March 23 2006, 00:44:11 UTC
around :]

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