"I have lost friends, some by death... others through sheer inability to cross the street ( Read more... )

"Brass bands are all very well in their place - outdoors and several miles away."
- Sir Thomas Beecham

"I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: 'O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous.' And God granted it."
- Voltaire

"If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to."
- Dorothy Parker

"Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century."
- Dame Edna Everage

"Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself."
- Mark Twain

"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve." - JRR Tolkien

but you’re too physical, physical to me

"The government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it." -Ronald Reagan

"I like a woman with a head on her shoulders, i hate necks." -Steve Martin

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happy 77th anniversary guyeeeeessss!

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i hate it when my face stays numb for an hour and counting after getting a filling. it is teh suck.